As it only needed moments for every wound Hidan gained to heal up again, and because he had the habit to shout insults towards the world even when his head might have been severed from his body, a lot of people tended to assume that getting hurt wasn’t that much of a deal to him. And well, this was not wrong. Up to a certain point. Getting hurt was alright as long as it happened in a way that showed Hidan’s devotion towards Jashin-sama, might it have been during prayer or while offering a sacrifice.
Yes, those were the occasions Hidan felt fine about getting hurt. But right now the situation in question felt a little bit different, he decided. Still feeling lightheaded he got a few sheets of paper towels ready, cleaning up the puddle his own blood had formed on the floor. Leaning against the fridge while searching for stability, he watched how the bright white of the paper towels soaked up his blood, the sheets turning slowly into a rich red. The tiled floor of the kitchen was a bright grey, if Hidan didn’t make sure to clean up everything now the mess would leave stains after all.
And he would have liked to avoid that for two reasons: Reason one was that the more time passed, the more Zetsu turned out to be the especially uptight sort of neat freak who would start nagging the moment he noticed you had caused a mess and hadn’t managed to clean up all of it yet. (How the guy managed to never leave a mess behind of his own considering his eating habits stayed a mystery to Hidan. He suspected it had to do something with that creepy summoned plant –maybe that plant itself did most of the flesh eating if there was a body to dispose of?- but at the same time a weird hesitation prevented him from directly asking.)
The second reason Hidan wanted to avoid missing to clean up the last drop of blood was because of Kisame. If he would leave a blood stain behind Kisame would smell it and he would know the source of the stain had been Hidan. The prospect was not appealing for a pile of reasons, mainly because Kisame might ask what had happened.
Yes, Kisame might be the straightforward kind to ask directly what the matter had been.
Supressing a sight Hidan continued cleaning away the blood, using the soap he had brought just in case. And just in case had happened; the tiles were clean now but the blood was still clinging to the joint sealer in the cracks between them. Blood always tended to stick to those rough surfaces, it was ridiculous.
Hidan tried telling himself that noisy comrades or none, his wound in itself had nothing to mean. It hadn’t. It was not like he was special in that regard or anything: From time to time Kakuzu tended to lose his composure and whoever was unlucky enough to stand in his way in that moment might end up as collateral damage, it was that simple, Hidan thought, absentmindedly checking if the wound on his ear was still bleeding. It did, slightly so. But it had also already started to close up again, starting to heal.
Yes, sometimes Kakuzu lost his composure and as Hidan spent the most time with him it ended up being Hidan experiencing the fallout. Nothing personal. (Not really.)
And still. Kneeling on the floor, feeling how his head was in the process of getting even more lightheaded while cleaning up the last traces of blood, Hidan couldn’t suppress the thought that it would be nice if things could change. If he wouldn’t have to be ready at all times to be at the receiving end of patience reaching its end, be it while voicing out whatever random thought was crossing his mind at the moment or be it while getting in Kakuzu’s way in the cramped space of the kitchen.
“Do you have to pray in here?”
Hidan opened his eyes, not standing up from the spot he was lying on the floor, looking up at Kakuzu who had entered the room. “I’m in the corner of the room, so hardly in the way of anyone. Believe it or not, I’m trying to be discreet about it.”
Kakuzu made a huffing noise that sounded like a reluctant sign of agreement. His eyes never left Hidan’s face, intensity of the stare feeling especially meaningful with everything but Kakuzu’s eyes hidden away by his mask.
No longer standing the growing silence between them Hidan continued talking: “I mean, I could pray on the roof but despite the concealment jutsu on this place, you never know who manages to notice anything anyway, right?” Once again the accuracy of Kisame’s nose entered his mind. It was a calming thought that the guy was on their side. Managing to track the origin of some random-ass blood drop solely by sniffing at it like some kind of overgrown hound, the thought just felt upsetting for some reason.
This time the reaction Kakuzu showed was a clear nod of agreement. “If you can’t help yourself but continue those prayers of yours, yes, then doing it indoors is probably the best.”
The wording, “if you can’t help yourself”, as if praying was some random enjoyment Hidan did to pass his time! As if he had nothing better to do or something! He wanted to say as much but in the end stayed silent, the memory of Kakuzu shoving him out of the way out of a sudden earlier in the kitchen managing to let Hidan’s throat feel heavy and leaden.
It was Kakuzu breaking the silence settling in between them: “Is this some other sort of prayer than the one you usually do?”
Hearing the question Hidan felt his mind go blank, feeling at loss what Kakuzu was referring to.
Trying to clarify Kakuzu nodded towards the candles standing on top of the prayer circle, only one of four burning.
“Oh! You mean those!” His mind sunken into prayer Hidan had forgotten for a moment that this time something really had been different from the usual. “Yes, this is a transfer ritual. I ask Jashin-sama to accept a pain I experienced outside of prayer or sacrifice as an offering.”
Kakuzu went still, the expression in his eyes becoming unreadable. “Your ear”, he finally said, acknowledging the earlier incident in the kitchen.
Avoiding his gaze Hidan nodded in confirmation, suddenly no longer able to be confronted with that empty stare Kakuzu was still directing at him. “Asking to transfer pain onto an offering is an option, so I thought, why not. All you have to do is get some fitting candles and explain the circumstances to Jashin-sama, so I thought, why not?”
“I see”, Kakuzu finally said, briskly turning around, walking towards the door through he had just entered the room mere minutes ago. “I see.”
“It’s an option, so I thought, why not?”
Kakuzu came to a halt at the doorframe, starting to speak without turning around again, looking out into the corridor instead. “I can’t stand cramped spaces. They make me feel trapped if they’re really small.”
Hidan leaned up on his elbows, still lying on the floor but trying to get a better look at Kakuzu now he was standing further away again. “Cramped spaces, huh?”
“I can’t stand them. Especially when I’m not alone in them but someone else is present. You surprised me sneaking up upon me from behind. Earlier I mean.”
“I wasn’t sneaking around at all! I don’t know in what kind of world you live where people make a noise like a wheezing dog the moment they start walking but I wasn’t sneaking up on anyone!”
Kakuzu was still facing the corridor, away from Hidan. “Fine, you were not sneaking. The thing I’m saying here is, if there’s a cramped space make sure I notice you before you come closer. Is all there is.” With this Kakuzu left the room, not turning around again.
For a moment Hidan just went still, looking after Kakuzu even when he already had been long since out of sight. Suppressing a sigh Hidan laid back on the floor again, feeling his head starting to spin again. It hadn’t been an apology. He hadn’t expected there to be one. Ultimately an apology didn’t mean shit if you were stuck with someone and they would continue to be an annoying asshole anyway. If someone didn’t change their behaviour to begin with an apology was utterly worthless, that’s why Hidan was no longer giving a fuck about people giving him apologies entirely.
He turned his head, looking at the single candle he had lit up. The symbol he was hoping his earlier pain would transfer into something meaningful, something helping to make Jashin-sama and him stronger.
Hidan hadn’t expected an apology and he hadn’t expected an explanation either. But Kakuzu had given him one anyway.
Still looking at the burning candle while his thoughts were wandering Hidan noticed a movement, a movement right next to him, breaking through the floor. He turned his head, being met with the dark green of a leaf. There was only someone in this place able to make this kind of annoying entrance: “Hello Zetsu.”
“Good evening.”
“What is it today with heathens keeping distracting me while I try to pray in peace? You’re the second one already!”
“I smelled blood”, Zetsu said, gesturing with his hand at the pile of blood-soaked paper towels laying at the side of the praying circle. Emerging fully through the floor he sat down on the floor, next to Hidan.
“Oh, those towels. It’s part of today’s ritual.”
Zetsu kept giving him a sceptical glare, a sign the part of the persona who loved to bitch around for no good reason was in charge of his body. Well, that was going to be fun then.
“I’m going to clean that up once I’m done here, okay? It’s part of today’s prayer, I just told you!”
“If you clean it up again that’s fine then.”
“Then stop bitching and let me pray in peace!”
Zetsu kept staring at him, and when he continued talking his voice carried that abrasive edge his dark persona loved to display so often: “No one’s complaining here. I found it odd that it smelled of your blood so strongly for no apparent reason, so I decided to check.”
“Well, as you can see it’s because I’m praying right now.”
“I’m aware”, Zetsu said, his wandering gaze getting stuck at the candles, making no impression he planned on leaving anytime soon.
Well, whatever. Trying to concentrate again a sudden thought placed itself in the centre of Hidan’s mind: “Wait! What does that mean, you smelled it was my blood? You can smell blood and that it is mine?”
Zetsu looked unimpressed, managing to appear even more unapproachable by directing his eyes back on Hidan again. “Yes, and once again, yes.”
Beginning to feel an odd sort of exposed Hidan stayed in his praying circle, giving Zetsu a critical glance. “I never knew that. I only knew of Kisame.”
“Well. Our sense of smell isn’t as good as Kisame’s by far. But it’s higher than average.”
“I see.”
“Yes.”
Hidan clutched the pendant of his rosary. His prayer actually had been over shortly before Kakuzu had entered the room earlier but for some reason he had no desire whatsoever to make that apparent. “I’m cleaning the towels away once I’m done. Told you.”
“I’m sure you will.” Zetsu’s voice had been unreadable. Hidan couldn’t say what aspect of his personality had been in charge.
Fuck it. Hidan sat up, feeling too restless to lay still anymore. “Oh, come on. Stop looking so freaked out because of a few bloody paper towels. I mean, don’t you ever make a mess when… uhm… eating?”
Zetsu looked unimpressed. “I don’t, no.”
“Oh?”
“It’s called having table manners.”
Hidan felt a lopsided smile show up on his face that had absolutely nothing to do with happiness. The dark side, it was definitely still Zetsu’s dark side in control of the body.
Fucking heathens and their lack of respect, fuck it all! Suddenly feeling fed up with absolutely everything Hidan decided to give in to his curiosity: “Can I ask you something?”
Hearing the question Zetsu started looking cautious. “You can. But depending what it is we might not answer.”
“That’s fine. Fine then. So, look: If you dispose of a body for us: How do you do that? I mean, you can’t have a much bigger stomach as the rest of us. There is no way you can eat an entire human body in one sitting!”
Some of the tension left Zetsu’s body. “Well, I can’t, you got that right. I only eat some parts of it, to signal my plant the nature of the target. It’s my plant then taking care of the rest.”
Hidan gave the leaves that seemed so firmly attached to Zetsu’s body a thoughtful look. “Right, your plant…”
“It’s a summon. I summoned it.”
“Oh. It’s just, I’ve never seen you without it.”
“It also serves as a shield. So I got into the habit of keeping it with me whenever possible.” From the way Zetsu was holding his body it was apparent his darker side was still in charge. But the abrasive edge had disappeared from his voice fully by now.
Hidan nodded, looking at the candle that was still burning. “Makes sense. With it being a shield and stuff.”
Zetsu stayed silent, only shrugging his shoulders. His attention had been grabbed by the burning candle as well. The candlelight flickering on his face seemed to erase the last bit of caution that had been set around his eyes, making them appear atypically distant. Like this the yellow colour of his eyes seemed to be an extension of the flame burning bright beside them.
The memory of Kakuzu showed up in front of Hidan’s inner eyes, how he had come to a halt at the door, before he had left the room. He hadn’t looked at Hidan when talking then. But the point was, he had been talking; Hidan hadn’t expected to get as much as an explanation why Kakuzu had flipped on him earlier. Hesitantly Hidan’s hand wandered to his ear, to the spot the skin had ripped. The wound was already healed fully.
More than ever Hidan felt he couldn’t give less of a fuck if someone apologized to him or not. He let his fingers trace the edge of his ear, looking if there was still the rest of a scab or something. But there was nothing, only smoothly healed skin. He asked himself if Kakuzu giving him an explanation for his outburst meant that Kakuzu was making an effort to get his temper a bit more under control. If Hidan was honest, he wasn’t averse to the idea.
The End