Chapter 5
"Well, here we are - my place." Kakashi said awkwardly, opening the front door. "I thought you might feel more comfortable staying with me rather than being alone at yours."
"We don't live together?"
"Uh, no. We haven't, uh, discussed that before." He answered, slightly panicked.
"Oh, okay…"
Iruka frowned as he took in his surroundings. Nothing about Kakashi's house felt familiar to him; and the whole atmosphere was kind of… empty and lonely, like no one was ever home or invited around. If it wasn't for the plant in the living room, Iruka would have thought the house had been completely abandoned. The style was very minimalistic, like Kakashi was just using it to survive in, and didn't consider it a home; and Iruka couldn't help but imagine what sort of things he would have at his own place to decorate it with. He didn't know what his house looked like, but he was sure he'd at least have something hanging up and on display.
"Is something wrong?"
"I just feel like I've never been here before."
"Well, you do have amnesia…" Kakashi said.
"No, I mean… With other things and people, I don't remember them, but I feel like I'm supposed to. But here, it's just… completely blank. It's like I'm looking at everything for the first time."
"Oh… Well, maybe that'll change as you get more familiar with the house. I'll show you around, if you like."
He decided not to tell Iruka that he was right and had never been here before, because he got the impression that Iruka thought their relationship was long-term; and if he wasn't expecting that they weren't living together, then he would have definitely been confused, and possibly hurt, that he had never even been invited over before. Kakashi felt guilty not telling the truth, but while Iruka thought they were together and was looking to him for support, he wanted to act convincingly as his partner to make him feel more comfortable while he was recovering.
"You'd better, if you don't want me to get lost." Iruka commented playfully.
Kakashi raised an eyebrow as he looked over at him, curious of his sudden change in mood; and when he saw the amusement dancing across his eyes, Kakashi knew exactly what he needed to do to keep the mood going and make Iruka feel more welcome. He straightened his posture, holding his head high; and bent his arm into an L shape and stuck his elbow out slightly.
"Perhaps you should grab hold, then, so there's no chance of that happening." he winked.
Iruka laughed and shook his head, wrapping one hand around Kakashi's bicep, and resting the other near his elbow. It was a little ridiculous, but it was exactly what he needed to escape the stress of losing his memories; and Kakashi seemed to know that. He had been such a perfect partner so far - so caring, sweet, and understanding of his needs; and was only giving him reasons to love him more. He really couldn't have fallen for a better man.
After the tour of the house, the rest of the day seemed to fly by. Kakashi had offered to make tea; and he and Iruka had spent the afternoon getting lost in conversation. Iruka had been curious about his life and the village; and by the time Kakashi had answered all of his questions, it was time to prepare something for dinner. Iruka had offered to help, but Kakashi wouldn't let him, so he disappeared to have a shower. When he came back out, Kakashi couldn't stop looking at him, and seemed to be blushing beneath his mask.
"W-What?" Iruka asked self-consciously, as he finished slipping his shirt on and fixed up his hair, which had been left out to dry.
"You just look really good." he said shyly.
Kakashi hadn't been acting when he said that. He'd gotten a glimpse of Iruka when he was shirtless, and he was better than really good - he looked sexy. Even as he was now, Kakashi was distracted by him. Iruka had gone through his drawers and found some plain pyjamas that looked similar to his uniform - a long sleeved shirt and long pants that were slightly too big for him; and there was something about seeing Iruka in his clothes that turned him on.
"Is dinner ready yet?" Iruka suddenly asked, snapping Kakashi back to reality.
"Oh, yeah, it is. Let's eat."
It wasn't much of a feast - just a simple traditional meal of rice, miso soup, fish, and vegetables; but Iruka seemed to really enjoy it, and volunteered to wash up afterwards. Kakashi felt guilty letting him do it, but he had insisted since he hadn't cooked. When all the cleaning was done, they decided to watch a movie together; and Iruka had curled up beside him on the lounge, relaxing into him as he got into the show. And while it was playing, Kakashi spaced out and reflected on his day.
He had been shocked when Tsunade told him Iruka thought they were dating, and even more surprised when she explained the reason was because he already had feelings for him; and all day he had been nervous and hesitant about his decisions, wondering if he should have told Iruka the truth. There were times he wanted to, but he kept seeing that smile - the one he saw at the hospital; and that always stopped him from saying something. There was a beauty in Iruka's expression Kakashi had never seen before - a depiction of true love and happiness, of someone completely fulfilled; and he didn't want to take that away from him. Iruka deserved to feel that happiness.
Kakashi looked next to him and saw that exhaustion had crept up on Iruka and he had fallen asleep; and a warmth stirred in his heart. Everything Iruka had projected onto him all day - all that love, the smiles, the affection, had made him feel weird in the chest, like even subconsciously he didn't know how to deal with it; but he felt like he was slowly coming to terms with it. And this time, he was feeling strangely relaxed and content, like all of this was normal for him.
Like Iruka was meant to be with him all along.