Longrider

Nathaniel couldn't have been more than six. He never questioned their visits, naively, he was just happy to be around a kid his own age. “Kevin, you and Abram can go on out back alright?” Mrs. Kayleigh said with a kind smile. The kind of smile that was so soft and warm that it could only be genuine. Kevin, a few inches taller than Nathaniel, had a similar one as he nodded and took Nathaniel’s hand in his. Nathaniel struggled to keep up as the older dragged him out of the door.

It was a large flat house, unlike Nathaniel’s that had hard stairs. It was blue, Nathaniel liked that. He’d only remember a few instances in which they’d arrived at the house as he grew older, but never really why. Usually, his mother would plan their visits for when his father was out of town. However, last night his mother had pulled him out of bed the night after a visit from the ‘bad men’ and put him in the car. 

“Owie.” Nathaniel had said, touching his mothers cheek. She would always smile, her eyes glossy and sunken. “I’m alright.” She whispered, holding his hand as she tucked him into the car seat. He fell back asleep a bit into the drive. When he woke up, he heard her crying. He pretended to still be sleeping. 

The “backyard”, Nathaniel thought, was nothing like the Wesninski’s backyard. It went on and on, a huge hill blocking his view. “This way.” Kevin called out joyfully, looking back at Nathaniel, as the younger jogged to keep up. Nathaniel couldn’t help but laugh as the grass tickled his legs. He felt free running through the field. Kevin pulled him to a gate, letting go of Nathaniel’s hand to duck under it. 

Nathaniel paused, noticing the big building. Often on their visits, Nathaniel was always in sight of his mother. He’d never been this far before. “Come on!” Kevin beamed, laughing as he went to open the big doors. Nathaniel took a hesitant look back to the house, shrunken in its distance. Then he turned towards the door Kevin was waiting at; Kevin’s excitement was unrufusably contagious and so Nathaniel ducked under the gate to follow him in.

The room smelt stale and putrid, causing the boys face to scrunch. Then he spotted the large beast, and his eyes widened. He had never really been allowed near animals before, let alone one as big as Driscoll. The way Kevin said his name mimicked his mothers accent. “It’s alright, he’s friendly. Watch.” Kevin showed as he held his hand out, letting the horse nudge him as he caressed its face fondly. Nathaniel, ever hesitant, slowly walked over. 

He let the boy guide his hand the same way. The horse cuddled into his palm, the sensation of soft hairs tickling his fingers forcing a giggle. Kevin went on and on about horse facts and how to care for them as they toured the stables. His mother rode them competitively and one day he wanted to be a great rider just like her. Kevin even let him feed the horse some carrots he’d snuck along. Nathaniel was fascinated with the animals every move. 

They must’ve lost track of time, Nathaniel realized, he heard his mother yell. “Abram!” She called out panicked, his stomach bottoming out at the worry in her voice. The horse backed away with a huff at the sudden noise. Nathaniel retreated and whipped around, hearing his mother’s distant calling. He ran out of the barn without a second thought. “Abram!” She called out, her voice relieved as she spotted him. She pulled him into her arms as she reached him.

“I’m sorry.” Nathaniel mumbled as she hugged him close, whispering to him. His mother pulled away, checking his face and brushing through his hair. “We’re leaving so say goodbye.” She commanded, her voice still shaking. Nathaniel’s stomach dropped. He didn’t want to go home yet. 

“Mary please. You can’t-“ Mrs Kayleigh said, her voice just as soft. “I have to.” His mother said, her voice tired and cold. Mrs Kayleigh went silent, her body tense. He watched his mother wipe her tears, and with that he waved over her shoulder as Kevin faded into the distant parts of his childhood. The happiest moments and fondest memories, never to see them again. Until that photo in the diner.

Kevin’s contagious excitement and bright smile had long been lost. Replaced with sunken eyes and a sharp scowl. He towered over Neil now, higher than those days on the farm. Nathaniel stood frozen, mouthing syllables he couldn’t speak. “Watch where you’re going.” His voice was deeper, lacking his mother’s accent or his childhood giddiness. He returned back towards the kitchen to grab from the roll of paper towels on the counter. Nathaniel forced his mouth closed, but couldn’t look away. He couldn’t move. 

An older woman turned from the oven on the opposite side of the kitchen. In the blue of movement Neil thought it was Kayleigh for just a second, until she spoke. “It’s just a spill sweetie, nothing to worry about.” She said sweetly. Her deep auburn hair was pinned up out of her face and it swayed as she wiped her hands on the apron around her waist. “Go steal one of David’s shirts and I’ll soak yours.” Her hands were gentle as she patted his shoulder and ushered him out of the kitchen.

The brunette huffed towards Neil, shooting him a glare as he stalked towards the stairs. “Ignore him, his people skills leave something to the imagination.” The woman whispered, her hand steady on Neil’s shoulder. They were just as gentle as he imagined, which made him tense and pull away slightly. He watched Kevin disappear before turning to her. With a nod, she dropped her hand and led him into the kitchen to wash up. “I’m Abby.” She said, tucking herself against the counter by the sink as Neil washed his hands. 

“You must be Neil.” The smile that accompanied her words wasn’t as bright as the others. It was warm and motherly in a way that burned Neil to look at it. He nodded, drying his hands on a nearby embroidered towel. “Pay him no mind; go fix yourself a plate. I bet your starved” She said, handing him a plate and a set of silverware. He nodded again, although the sight of Kevin had killed his appetite. 

He turned the corner and watched for a moment as the group chatted amongst themselves, passing around dishes. He noticed a white chair that contrasted the dark oak set was pulled up between Dan and Wymack at the far end of the table. He felt his nerves shudder at the thought of sitting squished up next to Wymack but then swallowed it down and scooted past the others to accept it. 

Dan shortly handed him a dish and went back to talking. Wymack eyed him slightly as he adjusted his seat a bit further. “Don’t let that idiot get to you.” He muttered, with a nod towards an empty seat between Nicky and Andrew. Neil made the mistake of following it, locking eyes with the blond. The intensity of his stare made Nathaniel’s skin feel raw. “He thinks the sun comes up just to hear him crow.” Dan muttered next to him as she handed down another dish. Neil nodded, taking a very modest portion of each option he was handed. 

The stairs creaked under heavy stomping. Neil jumped slightly, almost causing him to drop the food in his hands. Kevin rounded the last step, wearing a plain t-shirt a size or two too big. Nathaniel met Kevin’s glare and matching grimace. This time, Nathaniel avoided his eyes like a plague. He only looked up to Abby sitting down straight across from him, she smiled gently asking Wymack to pass the dish. He could see out of the corner of his eye, Andrew's accessing glare next to her. He refused to look back up again after that.

He ate in silence amongst the chatter, everyone easily keeping on without him. Until Nicky got nosey. “What about you Neil?” Nicky pipped up from the far end of the table. Nathaniel didn’t look up to the name more than to the abrupt silence as everyone turned towards him. He looked up slowly, confused and frightened at the sudden attention. “What?” He asked dumbly. 

A few people snickered along the table and he was convinced he’d said something wrong. Andrew didn’t move, he seemed to be awaiting Neil’s answer. Nicky began to speak again. "Where’d you come from? What's your story?" asked Dan, her voice kind but curious. The gaze of the others did not waver. Neil shifted awkwardly in his seat, feeling like a rabbit surrounded by foxes. He glanced around the table, his gaze catching on Andrew's stare. 

“Nowhere really. I moved around a lot.” Nathaniel said awkwardly, his fingers fidgeting as he played with his food nervously. Matt chirped up from beside Dan. “Military?” He asked, mid chew. Nathaniel blinked for a moment. He could say yes but isn’t there some sort of way to track that? Not that anyone would, maybe they wouldn’t question it. The look on Andrew’s face disproved that theory immediately. “No.” He answered shortly. 

“Foster care?” Nicky chimed in innocently, taking a bite. Nathaniel shook his head, causing more than one person’s brow to furrow. “Just move around a lot?” Dan asked, more doubtful that clarifying. Nathaniel looked at her, still for a second before nodding. The room got quiet, the clinking of forks to plates setting an unpleasant rhythm. 

Alison snorted across the table, being the first to speak up. “This one’s got a limited vocabulary.” Her winged eyes were as sharp as her tone, steady with condescension. Dan laughs loudly, almost spitting out the beer she’d just taken a drink of. ”Limited? That’s putting it lightly.” She retorted, “I’ve heard mutes say more.” Matt snickered to himself, gesturing with his beer. “Like Andrew.”

Andrew's glare slid to Matt with ease, yet it was laced with boredom now. Abby shook her head, “Boys. Don’t be mean.” She says before taking a bite, fixing them with a stare. As Matt smiles in apology and looks back down to his food, Nathaniel watches Andrew drop his gaze and spare Abby a furrowed brow. Wymack snorts in response to her chiding but continues to eat his dinner. “Don’t bother it”, he says between mouthfuls of food, “These two will never be able to play nice for long.” 

Wymack shot them both a look, turning to Neil as he gestured with a fork. "You ain’t gotta go into specifics, but surely you can give us something," he said, his voice gruff but not unkind. Nathaniel shifted again. "I don't really have anything interesting to say," he said shortly, trying to shrink into his chair. 

 “You know I bet he’s just shy.” Nicky said confidently with a smirk towards Neil. Neil didn’t answer, just looked back at his food. He didn’t look up again. “Who wants pie!” Abby jumped up from her seat, Neil guessed she was eager to cut the tension. Neil hated sweets but took a slice when she offered it.