Insecurity
As if he had been torn from a dream, the fox demon jumped back and found himself back in this world.
His eyes were wet and his heart was heavy in his chest. His trembling limbs could hardly hold him when he leaned on his hands and tried to sort his thoughts. He had seen it, his memories.
He had called him a murderer, he who hasn’t done anything and had lost everything himself.
"Sasuke it ... I'm so ... sorry ...", Naruto just sniffed and felt the tears running down his cheeks.
It was quiet.
His blue eyes froze as he looked at his friend's motionless body, which lay on the cold floor in front of him.
"Sasuke!"
He almost fell over him trying to pull him close.
"Sasuke say something!"
Nothing.
His pulse was racing and he tried to listen. Nothing. No breathing, no heartbeat, no pulse.
The fox demon's wet eyes filled with even more tears as he pulled his friend close and hugged him.
"Sasuke wakes up. Please ... ”, he sobbed softly while rocking his friend in his arms. It couldn't be!
"You can't die now."
He clung to him and implored every god, demon and power in the world to have his friend open his eyes and insult him.
He whispered his forehead laying to his friend's.
"You can't leave me alone."
"His life is in your hands," It whispered softly into the demon's furry ears.
He raised his head and saw the white fox spirit that had previously revealed the truth about his family.
Naruto's face twisted into an angry, desperate expression.
"YOU! You allowed that to happen! Why didn't you tell me the truth?“
He shouted at him, his pointed canine teeth flashing out sharply.
“Truth is never absolute. Everything is truth, but you let yourself be dominated by your feelings instead of trying to find his truth. ”
Naruto's lips curled into a narrow, trembling line. He hated to admit it, but the fox was right. It was his fault. He had doubted him, thought he was like the others, even though he should have known better.
"His life is in your hands," repeated the white fox spirit the words of the shadow.
Naruto raised his head. Did that mean he had murdered him?
The white fox fell silent before a sharp, whistling sound drew Naruto's attention to Sasuke.
"He is breathing!"
He almost dropped the blind one in surprise. It was a terrible sound, but the black-haired man was breathing, though the blood of his agony was still covering his face.
"You alone have the power to relieve his torments, because it is your powers that can influence his curse. Beware of the shadows of your anger, little fox demon. "
The white ghost disappeared, leaving the blonde baffled in the cold night.
◊◊◊
"I'm so infinitely sorry Sasuke ..." the fox demon whispered softly after washing his friend and bedding him onto the small futon. Sasuke was cold as death and still hadn't said a word. His eyes were closed, but he was breathing. Naruto cuddled lovingly to his friend, still barely believing that he had almost murdered him. He had made him suffer, inflicted pain on him for something that wasn’t even his fault. On the contrary, Sasuke had suffered almost the same thing, if not worse. Naruto felt bad. His impulses had taken him by surprise and he had almost killed the most important person in his life.
"I'm a monster ..." he whispered ruefully as he pulled the black-haired man close.
He was really a monster. The villagers had been right.
The fox demon suddenly felt cold fingers on his arm and opened his eyes just to look into his friend's now almost white-grey eyes.
Shocked by the sight, but happy that his friend had regained consciousness; he pulled him closer into his arms and buried his face in the crook of his neck.
"I'm so sorry Sasuke! I…"
Sasukes cold hand slid slowly, even tenderly, into the demon's golden blonde hair.
"You ... didn't do anything wrong," he whispered softly, his voice broken and rough.
It was okay. He hadn't done anything wrong, even though Sasuke still didn't know what had happened. He sensed what was in the mess of his own memories.
"Sasuke ...", sobbing and sniffing, the fox demon pressed himself against his friend. After all he had done, how could he say he hadn't done anything wrong?
◊◊◊
"Are you sure you don’t want me to help you?" Naruto asked worried and sneaked around his friend.
He'd taken care of him for days - or at least tried to - and was glad that his friend could get up again, but he was worried.
"If I stay in your care for another day, I will certainly die," Sasuke replied only, remembering the failed meals of the past few days. The fox had certainly meant well, but his culinary experiments had finally persuaded Sasuke to take care of it himself again as soon as possible.
"You're mean ... I really did my best!"
Naruto pouted, even though he was really happy that the Uchiha was feeling better. However, uncertainty remained. What was it, the fox had said? He had his life in his hand. If he wasn't careful, he might hurt him again.
The very thought frightened the fox demon. He didn't want to lose him.
If he had realized one thing in the past few days, it was that he truly loved Sasuke. He never wanted to be without him for even a second.
But even though he was tempted to break the curse, he was afraid to harm his friend by trying. Who knew what would happen if he consciously concentrated his strength onto him.
"Naruto, are you alright?"
Sasuke suddenly pulled him out of his thoughts. He sensed something was wrong and Naruto still hadn't told him what exactly happened that night. He hardly remembered the events, only felt a hot, dull throbbing pain when he tried to remember.
"I... oh nothing. I was just wondering what to hunt for you! "
Sasuke paused for a moment. Inside him, he felt resistance to let his friend go alone.
"Why don’t we just… stay inside today? We still have enough supplies. ”, He suggested, before even thinking.
Naruto's furry ears straightened in surprise. Sasuke asked him to stay?
How long had he dreamed of that moment? How many times had he tried to imagine what it would feel like and started grinning? He no longer knew, but now that it was happening, his mouth simply stood open.
"You… eh..I should ... so you mean I should stay with you?", He repeated stuttering. Was he hallucinating?
"Hm.", Sasuke just nodded silently, his back turned to him. Yes, he didn't want him to go and maybe not come back.
Sasuke winced as the arms of the fox demon hugged him from behind and pulled him close, his nose snuggled close to his neck and Naruto purred loud and satisfied.
Sasuke felt the warmth on his face as he leaned his head and body against his friend, enjoying their intimacy for a moment.
"Naruto ...", he finally started quietly and tried to find the right words for what he wanted to tell him - no – what he had to tell him.
"Hm?" The demon grumbled and turned his ears a little to cuddle closer to his friend.
"One day ... I won't be with you anymore."
Sasuke's voice was shaky, uncertain. He hadn't wanted to tell him, but it was probably better to prepare the demon for the inevitable before it broke his heart.
Naruto raised his head in shock and released the black-haired from his arms.
"W-what are you saying? But why? Did I do something wrong? I… I will never hurt you again, I promise! I don't use my powers anymore! I-"
"NARUTO!" Sasuke interrupted and finally turned to him.
The pale hands rested gently on the demon's scarred cheeks.
"Not because I don't want it, but because people don't live forever."
The blonde felt a lump in his throat. Did that mean, no matter what he did, his friend would die? Sooner or later he would just die?
"That too ... is time. Do you remember what I told you? ” Sasuke breathed softly and put his forehead against his friend's.
"Nothing is eternal, Naruto. Not for us humans. "
Naruto felt sick. That could not be true!
"That ... I won't allow that," he replied stubbornly and put his arms around his friend again to pull him close.
"If we die, then only together!"
A moment passed, before Sasuke slowly put his hands around his friend and hugged him back. They both knew that the fate was not in their hands. Demons lived forever or were reborn like the gods, but humans were not. Human beings eventually die and leave nothing but the emptiness in the hearts of those who had survived.
"I won't let you die," Naruto whispered again, making a decision at that moment. He would break his friend's curse and find a way to live together with him. Here or in the world of demons. There would be a place for them somewhere.