twenty-six
“I am sorry to pull you away from your team, Gai-kun, but this could not wait.”
“Of course, Hokage-sama!” Gai smiled brightly. “My team are fully prepared for the exam tomorrow and will shine brightly in the Springtime of their Youth! I know they will do wonderfully!”
The atmosphere in the Hokage’s office remained grim after his declaration.
“It’s about Naruto.”
Gai’s smile faltered. He had been looking for his student to wish him luck for the exams but he had been unable to find his former apprentice or his team. He had heard Kakashi was in the village so he knew they were not out on a mission but he had not managed to track down his rival either. Kakashi had not avoided him like this since his ANBU days but Gai had assumed he was preparing his genin team for the exam. Naruto was a determined young man and now he had a real team Gai had not a single doubt that his wonderful student would take the exams by storm, earn his chunin vest and take one step closer to his dreams.
“He has defected from Konoha.”
…what?
“The ANBU are on his trail and we have contacted Jiraiya. They should find him soon.”
Naruto had…
“You were his teacher for a long time so I felt you deserved the courtesy of hearing it directly.”
What?
It felt like Hokage-sama had driven a kunai straight into Gai’s chest. Naruto had left Konoha? He knew that it was his goal but Naruto had hoped to emulate the Sannin. He really thought his student was making strong strides towards his goal so why would he suddenly run like this? What had changed?
“I’m sorry, Gai-kun.”
For once, he did not know how to respond. He could only stand there in silence, going over every single interaction he had had with Naruto in recent months. There had been nothing. He had been his teacher for four years, Gai should have noticed! How could he claim to care about the boy if he missed something like this? Did Naruto lose faith in him? How had he failed his student?
“Gai-kun.”
He swallowed, his throat dry.
“Hokage-sama.”
His leader looked at him with pity.
“We have always known Naruto’s heart lay beyond the borders of this village. He only stopped his attempts to defect when he was young because he realised that it wouldn’t work. He has obviously been planning this escape plan for a long time. It is a shock, yes, but not a surprise.”
Gai was surprised. Gai was very surprised.
“Focus on the team you have.” Hokage-sama continued. “They will need you for the rest of the Chunin Exams. ANBU and Jiraiya will handle Naruto. He will be back soon enough.”
Naruto would never be allowed on missions again. He would be branded a flight risk; he would be confined to the village, if not outright imprisoned, until he could earn the trust of the village enough to be restored to normal duties. Gai knew that would never happen. They had not managed to foster a positive relationship with Naruto when he was not a criminal but now?
“Of course, Hokage-sama,” he bowed, turning to leave quietly. The door to the Hokage’s office softly clicked shut.
Gai loved Konoha. He loved this village with everything he had and he would gladly lay down his life for it. The Will of Fire burned brightly and Gai was so proud to be the Sublime Green Beast of Konoha. He had never once wavered in this loyalty and he trusted Hokage-sama with his life, his team, his friends; everything he had to give belonged to the village and its leader.
He knew this was the protocol. They had to retrieve Naruto not only for his own safety but to protect the village from secrets being leaked to other villages. It was the same for anyone who defected.
But Gai didn’t want them to find him. He did not want Naruto to be dragged back kicking and screaming to a village he would never be able to leave. His mind kept being forced back to every mission they had spend outside the village and every moment of joy he got to experience with his student. Naruto had never been so light and free and vibrant and Youthful than he had on those missions. Every time it was like seeing what his student could have been and Gai had always hoped he could find that in Konoha one day. He had been naïve.
He loved Konoha and he was its loyal soldier…but he also loved Naruto and he was his teacher. It was the first time Gai had ever experienced such a divide within himself. Gai had never doubted his path and his loyalties but he just could not bring himself to agree with Konoha on this. He wanted Naruto to be happy and free and now it had reached this point, Gai knew that would only happen outside of Konoha. He wanted his student to be safe but Naruto was strong; he had always been so strong and determined and diligent and a shining example of Youth for all. He knew everyone else would have seen it eventually but Gai was realistic enough to know that there was no turning back from this. Naruto had made his choice and there was nothing Gai could do about it.
He wanted Naruto to be happy. It was all he ever wanted for his students. If Naruto could only find it far from here, Gai could not find it in his heart to stand in his student’s way. Gai’s failure was not Naruto’s burden to bear; it was on Gai for not giving him a reason to stay. He had tried for four years and still failed. He could not fault his student for seeking his own happiness.
His team would be making their last minute preparations for the exams right now. He knew they would be fine. He needed to find Kakashi. His rival had avoided him for too long and now Gai knew why, he was not about to let his rival suffer alone a moment longer.
He didn’t know how long he had been sitting here. He’d stopped feeling the effect of the elements a while ago and he hadn’t seen anyone for longer than that. He wondered how Sasuke and Sakura were doing but the thought wasn’t enough to move him. They would be fine, better off without him. He had failed completely and utterly as a teacher and his students knew it.
Naruto had defected. Sasuke had covered for him. Sakura felt like she was ignored and disregarded. His failures piled up one after the other and Kakashi was drowning in them. He never should have taken them on as a team. He had destroyed his own team as a student now he had destroyed another as a teacher. He couldn’t even look at the Memorial Stone where teacher and teammates’ names were carved into the smooth surface without bile rising in his throat. He knew he hadn’t been suitable for teaching but he’d done it anyway and now they were here; three genin irrevocably changed and their trust broken. Kakashi knew what a team falling apart did to a person and now he had inflicted it on his own students.
He wasn’t even allowed to track Naruto down himself; not that he knew what he would do if he found him. He wanted to speak to his student, find out where things had gone so wrong, fucking apologise but he didn’t know if he would be capable of bringing his student back to the village. He knew once Naruto entered those village gates he would never be allowed outside of them again and Kakashi knew the kid well enough to know that was a sentence worse than death for the Uzumaki. What would he even be bringing him back for? The team was broken and Kakashi a failure as a teacher. He could honestly say that Naruto would not be better off back on Team Seven.
He needs to transfer the other two to other teams. He would not be their teacher any longer. They deserved a sensei that knew what they were doing and more importantly, one that didn’t ruin everything they touched. Sasuke would be fine as long as he was put with someone strong to teach him. Sakura would take it harder but she had been more attached to the idea of a team. She would probably feel betrayed, like she’d been swept aside once again without consideration, but Kakashi knew that she would understand eventually. This would be the best thing for the both of them.
He would go back to ANBU. It was where he belonged. It was where he could be the most use for his village while doing the least amount of damage. He knew his friends would not be happy with him, especially Gai with how long they’d fought to get him out but this was his life. They hadn’t fucked up like he had; they didn’t understand this was for the best.
He felt the bile rise at the thought of Gai. He had managed to avoid the other jounin since returning to the village. He couldn’t face him. He knew how much Gai loved Naruto. This wouldn’t have happened if Naruto was still Gai’s student.
“Kakashi.”
No.
“Kakashi, you cannot blame yourself.”
He couldn’t do this.
“Kakashi.”
He wouldn’t be able to escape. Gai was fast and Kakashi’s limbs were stiff.
“The fuck I can’t,” he finally replied, voice hoarse.
“Naruto has always been an independent spirit. You cannot assume responsibility for his choices.”
“Like you haven’t.”
Gai did not reply. It was the quietest he’d ever heard Gai and it somehow made it all worse. He wished he’d yell at him.
“Naruto has always planned to leave.”
Kakashi swallowed, his throat dry. Gai walked over and sat himself next to Kakashi, crossing his legs with his back straight. He barely recognised him like this.
“Naruto’s dream was to leave Konoha,” Gai continued. “I am sure you are aware of his attempts in his youth. He wished to become strong enough to reach Sannin status so he could do it legally.”
He knew Naruto hated Konoha, that he took every opportunity to leave when he could. He hadn’t known the Sannin bit though. Where was Gai going with this?
“I tried to give him a reason to stay,” Gai’s deep voice was subdued. “I failed in that.”
“You were probably the only reason he stayed as long as he did,” Kakashi scoffed, looking away to stare into the trees. “He never would have left if he stayed with you.”
“We cannot know that.”
“I can!” Kakashi snapped. “Don’t fucking patronise me. This was my fault. He was under my care, under my watch, in foreign territory. He slipped away under my nose.”
“You are too hard on yourself, my rival.”
Kakashi scoffed. He didn’t know why Gai wasn’t being harder on him. Gai had always been stupidly optimistic and forgiving and it was not fucking helpful. Kakashi knew he had failed and Gai pretending he hadn’t was making it even worse.
“I failed him, Gai. I failed him and Sasuke and Sakura and I was never cut out to be a teacher.”
“He is more than your student.”
That stopped Kakashi short.
“What?”
“He would never express his sentiments out loud and he kept his emotions to himself, but Naruto was mine for three years. I know my student, Kakashi. His heart is guarded more closely than the Daimyo but he allowed you as close as he was able. Those years you spent as his tutor did not suddenly vanish.”
What the fuck was he even talking about?
“There were things he would talk to you about that he would not mention to me. He trusted you. I do not believe that has changed.”
“Gai, he left!” Kakashi finally turned back to his friend, meeting grim dark eyes. “He chose to become a criminal over being on my team!”
“It was not about you.”
That stopped Kakashi short. Gai crossed his arms, looking the most grave Kakashi had ever seen him. There was nothing of the happy, ‘Youthful’ man that Kakashi knew. It was very seldom that Gai was serious like this. Kakashi could count the number of times on his hands with fingers to spare.
“Naruto leaving was not about you. You are not the sole reason for his defection. Naruto has been failed by this village his entire life and we were not enough to overcome that. That failure is on us but Naruto leaving? You cannot take that choice away from him by assuming responsibility for it.”
Gai sighed heavily. How much had he been thinking about this?
“I’ve never heard you say anything against the village before,” Kakashi couldn’t help but comment, still processing Gai’s words.
“I always believed they would see what I see. A wonderful student; the best I have ever trained. He is hard-working, diligent, faces everything head on and never holds himself back. He would have been the best the village has ever seen. He is kind and honest and if you are fortunate to be allowed past his guard, a wonderful person who cares with his whole heart even if he struggled to show it.”
Gai shook his head.
“We did what we could,” he continued. “We loved him and supported him and gave him room to be himself without judgement, but it was not enough. We failed, yes, but Naruto has been let down for longer than we have been in his life. We just were not enough.”
He hadn’t been expecting this from Gai. He knew his friend was clever and observant, a fact many people overlooked due to Gai’s personality and way of expressing himself, but the man was an Elite Jounin. You did not get to that rank by strength alone. Kakashi had known him too long to be fooled like the others but it still caught him off guard occasionally.
“You don’t want them to bring him back.”
It wasn’t a question.
“Do you?”
Kakashi’s silence was answer enough.
“Wherever he may be, I hope for his happiness,” Gai smiled, the ghost of his usual enthusiasm emerging. “I hope he is finally able to be free and immerse himself fully into the Springtime of his Youth. I have no doubt he will shine brightly no matter where he is.”
Kakashi still didn’t think he was teacher material. He still fully intended to transfer his team out and reapply to ANBU. The weight of Naruto leaving still sat heavily on his heart and the guilt still churned a storm in his gut. He didn’t know how Gai could still find the positives in this situation.
“He won’t be able to evade the ANBU forever,” Kakashi pointed out. “Jiraiya will find him too. Whatever happiness is temporary and when he gets dragged back, things are going to be even worse for him.”
“And if that happens, we will be here for him,” Gai said as if it was most simple thing in the world. “We will show him that we are still here and we always will be.”
His friend finally stood.
“When is the last time you had a meal?”
“I’m fine.”
“That is not what I asked.”
“I’m fine, Gai.”
“Eggplant soup it is. I will return shortly, my rival.”
Gai vanished and Kakashi sighed. He could leave to escape but he knew Gai would just track him down again. The other jounin had been there for the entirety of the shitshow that was Kakashi losing his team and as much as he’d tried to ditch the older man during his time in ANBU, Gai had always turned up with a smile and a challenge. Gai had seen him at his lowest and never looked away. This may be a new low for Kakashi but Gai would never waver. He didn’t know why he bothered with Kakashi. He certainly didn’t return the favour.
He finally looked at the Memorial Stone.
“I’m sorry, Minato-sensei. I failed your son.”
Silence was the only answer.
Naruto bounced through the streets, using his bloodline limit to avoid any collisions on the narrow streets. It wasn’t the same as training but it was nice to stretch it a little. He couldn’t use chakra or anything that might give him away as a shinobi but nobody ever noticed his eye. He already had to run at a normal civilian speed and couldn’t water walk on the canals or use his tree-walking to navigate the rooftops so he had to use something to challenge himself. He wanted to keep developing his bloodline limit and this was one way to make sure he didn’t get rusty.
It had been one blissful month since he’d escaped from the Land of Waves and although it hadn’t been long since he’d settled in the capital, Naruto found that the lightness and joy he’d felt on arriving hadn’t faded in the slightest. He’d managed to find room and board in exchange for courier services. It was less than he’d earn on a D-rank per package or letter and he lost most of it for his ‘room and board’ but Naruto didn’t care. If anything, working for an asshole who was taking advantage of kids with nowhere else to go worked to his advantage because it was much more likely to be kept on the down low which was perfect for him. He had somewhere to sleep and he scavenged enough to eat and he had something to not only keep him active but let him get to know the city.
It was way bigger than he’d first suspected on his arrival. The whole place was organised in concentric circles with canals separating the streets and running through the entire city. The closer to the centre of the city, the higher the ground became, like a man-made mountain. At the peak was the Daimyo’s residence, decorated in gaudy fountains and white metal fencing. The buildings in the city itself were tall, with the majority a light beige and at least five stories high, topped with rounded red roofs. Unlike Konoha, which tended towards sprawling, low level complexes, the Capital was condensed with buildings that were thin but tall to fit them all in. The streets and buildings were so bright and clean. Konoha was well-developed but it retained some of the elements of the natural world that surrounded it; this place was designed to be sleek. It made sense with all the rain. It was like things were built for water to slide off, draining back into the canals.
Tall white walls surrounded the city, with smaller buildings and residences on the rougher ground outside. They still had the canals but they lacked the clean, white stone pathways that ran throughout the rest of the city, instead using well-worn dirt paths and misshapen wooden bridges. There was free traffic between these buildings and the others beyond the wall but the divide was quite clear. Naruto lived in the poorest of the city and he honestly preferred it. The city itself was a little too nice for him to be comfortable with but he sucked it up for his job.
He would probably be able to do the courier runs in a third of the time if he used chakra but it was fine. It had become apparent he was still one of the quickest on the job and so he was given the deliveries than required the most groundwork. He didn’t speak to any of the other kids though some had attempted to speak to him a little and the geezer that hired them had no interest beyond barking orders.
He was left alone and it was fantastic. Everyone had gotten the message so they all ignored him back at the house other than to give him his portion of breakfast and dinner. It wasn’t like back in Konoha where they ignored him with malicious intent; they just ignored him because they had their own problems or they didn’t have time for him. It was what he’d always wanted. No one picked a fight with him either, because that was a one way ticket to being chucked out for causing trouble and no one could afford that.
Even in the city itself, it was like he was a part of the scenery. No one looked at the couriers or the gondola drivers or any of the workers that kept the city ticking over. They were just there and even the people Naruto delivered to barely looked at him, much less thanked him.
He was having the time of his life.
He’d even managed to scrape together enough money to get a waterproof poncho. He kept his non-descript clothing that he’d initially brought but after two soggy days of delivery he’d decided he’d had enough. It was a boring brown, with a couple of holes and had obviously been well worn before he’d gotten his hands on it, but it was light and kept him dry. The bucket hat he’d stolen from Tazuna hid the blond hair that was already starting to grow back; he’d have to cut it off again soon. He would have to figure out a better idea to cover the whisker marks on his cheeks; he was running out of sunscreen and dirt may not go over well with some of the clients. Something to think about. He was starting to get used to his fake name ‘Riku’ at least.
He was not naïve enough to believe Konoha wouldn’t be on his trail, just waiting to drag him back to the village and lock him up. He’d kept an ear out for any mention of his home village and his deliveries to the city guards (which he was pretty certain were bribes but was none of his damn business) had given no indication that people from the Land of Fire had entered the city limits. ANBU wouldn’t exactly announce their presence and Naruto doubted he’d be able to pick them out a crowd but it wasn’t exactly risk free.
The Land of Water was barely recovering from the recent civil war and shinobi from other countries were not exactly welcome. He’d heard enough stories during his time in the city to know that if word got out that Konoha shinobi had entered the Capital of the Land of Water, the home of the Daimyo, there would be uproar. If they did find him, if he could get the attention of anyone, it would at least Konoha some trouble. He sure as shit wasn’t going to go quietly.
He knew he couldn’t stay forever but he could enjoy it while it lasted. He’s earned a little peace.
Brown eyes looked up at the tall white walls. It had taken longer to get here than he would have liked but he was here now. He’d beaten the ANBU at the very least and despite how annoyed he was with the whole thing, he had to give Minato’s brat credit; he’d planned this out well and had managed to stay hidden longer than any of them had expected.
It wasn’t enough though. Very few people could escape his information network, certainly not a genin. It was an admirable attempt but he couldn’t help but think that the measly month the kid had managed to squeeze was hardly going to be worth the punishment back in Konoha. Sarutobi-sensei had already informed him that the training trip he had planned for the brat may not be possible. The kid was one step away from being locked up and Jiraiya was one of the few things standing in the way of that. The kid had to learn how to use the Kyūbi’s chakra and he could hardly do that from a cell. It was a waste of his potential and a dishonour to Minato.
What was the point of this? Why had Minato’s brat fled the village? All he remembered of his godson was a happy, gurgling baby in the wake of the Kyūbi attack. He knew he hadn’t exactly hung around but it was hard to imagine a kid of Minato and Kushina committing treason like this. He would get the answers before he took him back to Konoha.
Jiraiya entered the Capital of the Land of Water.