The Beginning
Ivan staggered into his apartment, slamming the door shut hastily. His legs felt weak, barely managing to carry him to the couch before he collapsed onto it.
His chest ached, each breath coming in shallow gasps as the events that had happened moments prior replayed in his mind over and over again.
Today was their graduation. Ivan was supposed to confess today. He had spent months planning this moment, rehearsing the words over and over until they were etched into his brain.
But it had gone so wrong.
The moment the words left Ivan’s mouth—“I like you. I’ve always liked you Till, for a long time now.” —Till..
He looked at him, his eyes filled with a disgust so raw that it made Ivan’s stomach twist.
“Seriously, Ivan? Am I a joke to you?” Till asked, his voice sharp and filled with disbelief.
The words hit Ivan like a punch to the gut, but it was the coldness in Till’s tone—the sheer lack of trust—that hurt the most.
Just how low did Till think of him?
“It’s not a joke,” Ivan had said, his voice cracking slightly as he fought to keep his composure.
“I’m serious.. I really mean it.”
But Till's expression only grew darker.
“Do you think this is funny? Did you honestly think that I would believe that?”
“I’m not joking! I’m serious!” Ivan insisted, his voice rising with desperation.
“Stop it,” The harshness in Till’s voice was enough to make Ivan flinch, his vision blurring slightly as a wave of dizziness hit him.
“This isn’t funny, Ivan. I don’t know what kind of game you’re trying to play now, but this is not okay.”
Ivan shook his head, his chest tightening. “Why would I lie about something like this? I—”
Till threw his hands up, his frustration etched in every word. “Because you're always like this! That’s just what you do! You’ve always been like this—stealing my pencils, hiding my things—just to hand them back later like you were some kind of.. saint!”
“That was years ago!” Ivan shot back, his voice cracking.
“But it’s still you!” Till snapped, his voice sharp and bitter.
“You’ve always needed the spotlight, always had to make everything about you.” He paused, taking a deep breath before continuing, “And you know what? I ignored it—I let it slide—because you were my friend.”
“But we’re not kids anymore, Ivan.”
The words sliced through him like a blade, leaving Ivan stunned.
Till took a shaky breath, his tone dropping but still laced with venom. “We’re graduating now. We’re supposed to be moving forward.”
“And yet, here you are, standing in front of me, pulling this—this stunt, like nothing happened!”
He exhaled sharply, his voice softening in that familiar way that always made Ivan melt.
“I really thought you had changed.”
The room fell silent, the tension between them was thick and suffocating, as both of them stood there, staring at each other.
Till looked at him like he was the one whose heart had been broken— when it should have been the other way around.
Ivan’s chest felt tight, as if the air had been sucked out of the room.
His breaths came in shallow, uneven gasps, each one more difficult than the last. His throat constricted painfully, and no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t seem to pull in enough air.
Subconsciously, Ivan was aware of the wetness gathering at the corners of his eyes.
He had prepared himself for rejection, but this—this—felt like his entire world was caving in.
It wasn’t supposed to feel like this.
It wasn’t supposed to hurt this much.
Till's words had cut deeper than he thought was possible.
And so, Ivan did what he always done when the situation becomes too much for him to handle.
He ran.
Ivan had turned and ran away before Till could say anything else. He didn’t even know what Till’s expression had been when he left.
And part of him didn’t want to know.
Now, back in his empty apartment, the weight of those words pressed down on him.
He had ruined everything, not just his chance with Till but their friendship, too.
Tears blurred his vision as he curled up on the couch, his body shaking.
He had known this was a risk.He had known Till would probably reject him. But he hadn’t expected it to hurt this much.
Ivan thought he had prepared himself well for this situation, but the ache in his heart says otherwise.
Wiping his eyes with trembling hands, Ivan pushed himself off the couch and stumbled to the window.
The city skyline stretched out before him, the lights glittering like stars against the night. But something was different.
A meteor shower blazed across the sky, bright streaks of light slicing through the darkness.
Ivan blinked, his breath hitching as he took in the unexpected spectacle.
The meteors were impossibly vibrant, painting the heavens with red and gold trails, their intensity almost hypnotic.
The sight stirred something deep within him, pulling memories from a time he thought he’d buried.
He and Till had watched a meteor shower once, years ago, lying on the rooftop at school. Ivan could still hear Till’s voice, laughing as he pointed out the brightest streaks.
Ivan pressed his forehead against the glass, watching as the sky seemed to come alive. The beauty of it felt cruel, like a taunt.
A reminder that his universe didn’t care about him.
His voice trembled as he whispered into the void, “I wish I could just disappear.”
The moment the words left his lips, one of the meteors flared brighter than the rest, a blinding burst of crimson and gold. Ivan instinctively closed his eyes, throwing his arms up to shield his face.
When he opened them again, everything was... quiet. The meteors were gone. The city outside his window looked the same as always.
“Huh..?”
Was he losing his mind?