Locksmith

The sun came in through the windows, and I grumbled as my eyes reluctantly opened. I was thankful that I’d been able to sleep at all, but I knew my eyes would be puffy from all of the crying I had done the night before. My hand blindly reached for my phone, and I began getting things set up for the day. I had the resort call the boys to make sure they were awake and told them which restaurant to meet me at for breakfast. I grumbled to myself as I rolled out of bed and began getting ready for the day. I wasn’t sure what the best way to dress for our activity was, so I went with something I wouldn’t mind getting dirty. I made sure it still looked okay, knowing that I might be able to convince the boys to take family photos so I could attach it to our Christmas letter. I finished most of the letter before we came on our trip, but I was hoping to include something about the trip and have our pictures be related. Once I was convinced I was ready, I made my way to the restaurant. When I walked in, I was shocked to see the boys waiting on me for once. The shock only increased when I saw that they’d ordered me a cup of coffee. I sat down with narrow eyes, trying to analyze what was going on and if they were planning to kill me or something.

“What’s going on here?” I asked slowly.
“What do you mean?” Billy asked with a frown.
“You’re both here before me. More than that, before me sits a cup of coffee, and next to that? Creamer that I like, and sugar.” I said, my gaze shifting to Tommy.
“We can’t be thoughtful sometimes?” Tommy asked, looking nervous.
“You can. Is that what you were being? You’re not going to ask me to do something dangerous today instead of what I have planned for us?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.
“We were just being thoughtful, swear,” Billy said, taking a drink of his juice.
“Well then… Thank you.” I said hesitantly.
“For sure, mom,” Tommy said with a nod.
“Are you guys excited about today?” I asked lightly.
“Yeah! I hope one of the dinosaurs burps on Billy.” Tommy said with a laugh.
“Well, I hope one sneezes on you,” Billy grumbled.
“Are you guys excited about something other than the possibility of the other having something gross happen to them?” I asked, shaking my head.
“Mom, we might get to touch a dinosaur. Of course, we’re excited,” Tommy said with a grin.
“I hope that you guys can understand why I had to say no yesterday,” I said gently.
“Yeah, we looked into the safety reviews of the hamster balls… There were a lot of reports about them just stopping.” Billy said with a shrug.
“Stopping?” I asked with a frown.
“Yeah, like, just stopped responding. They left people trapped in them for hours until they started to respond again.” He said, grimacing at the thought.
“That sounds horrible,” I said, shaking my head.
“Yeah… So, really, you did us a favor.” He said with a laugh.
“And… I’m sorry for calling you lame. It wasn’t fair.” Tommy said gently.
“Who did the two of you talk to?” I asked with narrow eyes.
“No one!” Tommy said quickly.
“That was too fast. Who was it?” I asked with a laugh.
“Fine. Mrs. Stark may have called to see how the trip was, and when we told her about the fight… Mr. Stark started to do research and shouted out a bunch of scary facts at us.” Billy said with a sigh.
“Of course they did,” I said, rolling my eyes.
“But, even if they hadn’t, you were still right to tell us no,” Billy said, shooting Tommy a look.
“Yeah. You’re our mom, or whatever. We know you want us to be safe, and because of that, we might disagree with you.” Tommy said with a nod.
“You were coached pretty well. They really scared you guys.” I said with a laugh.
“Not funny,” Billy said with a groan.
“Maybe not to the two of you, but to me and the Starks, it is very funny,” I said with a smile.
“Yeah, well, you guys are mean,” Tommy said, raising an eyebrow.
“I’ll stop. I think our waiter is here anyway.” I said, not wanting to push anything.

We put in our orders for breakfast and waited for it to show up. I couldn’t help but pull out my phone to send a quick text to Pepper to thank her for talking to the boys. She would tell me I didn’t need to, but I hadn’t been able to get through to the boys, and in one phone call, she and her husband fixed what was a big argument between us. She also got them to see that what I did was because I cared about them, something I never expected them to acknowledge in the first place. Our food arrived, and it was better than anything I ever could’ve expected. The waffles I got were the fluffiest things I’d ever eaten. They were perfect. The boys seemed to enjoy their food as well because they stayed off their phones for the entire meal. When we finished eating, Tommy got up to go to the bathroom before we left, and Billy looked at me as if he were studying me. It was unnerving; the way he seemed to be figuring something out the more he looked at me.

“Mom? Can I ask you a question?” Billy asked slowly.
“That depends… You told me you weren’t going to make this a shakedown. So, what kind of question?” I asked with a soft frown.
“Do you… Like Natasha?” He asked, grimacing as he spoke.
“Are you asking if we are friends?” I asked with a frown.
“No… Like, do you have a crush on her?” He rephrased.
“Why would you ask me that?” I asked quickly.
“Every time she pulls you to the side, you come back to us blushing. And this is kind of the first time I’ve seen you smile around someone who wasn’t us or your friends in a long time.” He said quietly.
“What do you mean? What teenage boy is noticing that kind of thing about their mom?” I asked, rolling my eyes.
“The one who wants you to be happy. It’s okay if you do, you know?” He said with a sigh.
“That talk with the Starks struck a chord with you, huh?” I asked, tilting my head.
“Can’t say the same for Tommy, though.” He said with a shrug.
“You have a right to be mad at me,” I said softly.
“For wanting to be happy? Dad’s happy. Why shouldn’t you be, too?” He asked with a shrug.
“Well, look at that. One phone call turned you into a man.” I said with a hum.
“Whatever.” He said, shaking his head with a grin. 

Tommy returned not long after we finished our conversation, and for the first time since we’d arrived, I didn’t feel like there was a weight on my chest. We made our way to the bus that brought guests to the park and started our journey. I was probably just as excited as the boys were to see dinosaurs. I think any sane person would be equally terrified and excited about getting to see the prehistoric lizards running around in this day and time. The bus ride felt like it took forever for us to get from the resort to the park, and that was probably a good thing, but the long journey, coupled with excitement, made it feel impossibly long. I knew I was being as bad as the boys, but I couldn’t help it. When we finally made it to the park, I figured out where we needed to be and grabbed a map to get us there. Hearing the sounds of the dinosaurs caused goosebumps to break out across my skin, and I could see the excitement building on the boys’ faces. We reached our destination, and they hurried to the railing in awe, with me following behind them slowly.

“Holy shit! Mom! Do you have your phone?” Tommy asked with excitement.
“I do. Watch your language.” I said, shaking my head.
“Sorry. You just have the best camera. No one is going to believe we were here and feeding dinosaurs. We have to have proof!” He said anxiously.
“Fine. But that means I’m probably using them on the Christmas card.” I said, raising an eyebrow.
“Does that mean pictures with us all together?” He asked with a whine.
“It sure does,” I said with a grin.
“Fine.” He agreed, sighing dramatically.
“I know, I’m the worst,” I said, putting a hand over my heart.

He rolled his eyes but didn’t make any smart remarks or comments, so I took it as a personal win. We began feeding the first dinosaur on our tour, and I watched the boys fall in love with each and every one we saw. To be fair, I was equally as enamored with them, but anyone would be if they were in our positions. The boys even let me take plenty of pictures of them, and for once, they looked happy to be together. More than that, they looked happy to be spending time with me, and that made me feel so much better about everything. Not only that, it reaffirmed that this trip had been a good idea, and I was starting to get through to them. Billy and I were getting more food from the bucket marked for the dinosaur we were on while Tommy was focused on trying to make the dinosaurs see him as a friend.

“Natasha?” Billy asked with a frown.
“What about her?” I asked with confusion.
“She’s here. Did you invite her?” He asked.
“She’s here? As in, she’s working?” I asked with a frown as my heart rate increased.
“Oh, my God. No. Mom, turn around.” He said with a sigh.

I turned around and saw Natasha making her way over to where we were. There was no reason for her to be coming our way, and yet, there she was. In an effort to avoid the boys hearing anything I didn’t want them to, I decided to meet her halfway. My heart was racing; I had no idea how she found us in the huge park nor why she wanted to find us. Not only that, Billy already thought I had a crush on her; the last thing I needed to do was give him more of a reason to think so. I had to send her away as quickly as possible, no matter how curious I was about why she had shown up. She seemed surprised to see me walking toward her and stopped in her tracks, letting me close the distance between us.

“What are you doing here?” I asked through my teeth.
“I work here. If you forgot.” She said softly.
“I did not,” I said, shaking my head.
“I’m here because you ran away last night. I wanted to make sure you were okay.” She said with a sigh.
“Does it matter?” I asked with a scoff.
“Annoyingly, yes, Wanda, it does. For whatever reason, I can’t help but care if you’re okay or not.” She said, shaking her head.
“I’ll be fine,” I said flatly.
“Could you not be so fucking stubborn for thirty seconds? I’m trying to check-in. I didn’t mean to bring Pietro up and upset you.” She said with a gentle shrug.
“I said it’s fine. Really.” I said, convincing no one.
“Fine, Wanda. If that’s how you want to play it, we can do that,” She said, nodding to herself.
“How did you even find me?” I asked with a frown.
“I work here, Wanda. You don’t think I could put your name into the database and figure out what activities you signed up for?” She asked, raising an eyebrow.
“You know, I forget you were in the military until you say shit like that,” I said with a sarcastic laugh.
“I’m going to go. I can see you’re fine, or whatever you’re pretending is fine, I guess.” She said, shaking her head.

I didn’t say anything, my stomach twisting over the fact that she still saw right through me. I did my best to push the feeling to the side as much as I could. When I could tell she wasn’t going to move, I decided to turn around and make my way back to the boys. When I was about halfway back, I heard her speak again. Her voice stopped me in my tracks, and I could feel Billy’s eyes on me. He was clearly looking for something that I wished he hadn’t picked up on.

“Enjoy your day, boys.” She said with a smile.
“You’re not staying? Is there another big emergency?” Tommy asked with a frown.
“No, nothing like that. I just don’t want to interrupt your day with your mom.” She said easily.
“You should stay!” Billy said quickly.
“No, I couldn’t.” She tried, shaking her head.
“Come on, you have to. We need a photographer. Mom sucks at it, and she wants these to be on the Christmas cards.” Tommy grumbled.
“Christmas is in a few days.” She said with slight confusion.
“Yup, mom is doing them digitally with the yearly letter,” Billy said with a nod.
“Um, hello? You asked me to take pictures of you.” I reminded them.
“Mom, you were literally our only option.” He said in a hushed tone.
“Boys, really. I should be going.” She said, trying her best to escape.
“Stay,” I said without thinking.
“What?” She asked with an understandable frown.
“They’re right. I’m horrible. And the majority rule says that you should stay.” I said with a sigh.
“Are you sure?” She asked, still looking confused.
“Don’t ask her that.” Billy groaned.
“Yeah, she’s sure! You’re staying!” Tommy said quickly.

I nodded, and she agreed to the boys’ excitement. They quickly launched into asking questions about each of the dinosaurs we encountered. To her credit, she took the time to answer each question no matter how insane they sounded to me. There was never a hint of annoyance in her voice, and she spouted out facts and left the boys mesmerized by her knowledge. I hated to admit that I was equally as impressed by her knowledge, but maybe even more impressed with the fact that she fielded every question and explained it to the best of her abilities. The tour moved pretty quickly, but Natasha was able to get a few pictures of the three of us that actually looked good. I was stunned when she showed them to me on her phone, but I just nodded and thanked her. She airdropped them to me, and I was slightly disappointed that she hadn’t had to text them to me. Though I knew it would be wrong of me to text her after she’d done that for me, I wasn’t entirely sure that that would stop me.

“Do you have a gun?” Tommy asked, analyzing her belt.
“Dude? What? You do not need to answer that. Nor should you.” I said, sending Tommy a questioning look.
“I was just curious.” He said, holding his hands up in surrender.
“How about I answer your question and say that because I’m off-duty, I’m not allowed to have a gun. But when I’m working, I get to have one.” She said with a breathy laugh.
“Go back to feeding the dinosaurs,” I said, shaking my head.
“You ask one question.” He grumbled.
“About a gun,” Billy said with a snort as he joined him.
“You do have a gun on you, though, right?” I asked quietly.
“Do you not trust the park’s safety?” She asked, raising an eyebrow.
“No, I don’t,” I said with an obvious frown.
“Well… Me either.” She admitted with a shrug.
“So you have one?” I asked slowly.
“I choose to plead the fifth on that.” She said with a hum.
“So you do. Cool.” I said with a nod.
“I was surprised you told me to stay. I didn’t expect that.” She said gently.
“Yeah, well, I would do anything to make them happy,” I said, looking at the boys.
“And what about yourself?” She asked, her eyes studying me.
“Meaning?” I asked with a frown.
“Will you do anything to make yourself happy?” She questioned lightly.
“I already did that. I uprooted their lives and everything they knew to make myself happy.” I said, shaking my head.

I walked back over to the boys and helped them feed the dinosaur we were on while Natasha took a little longer to rejoin us. Neither of us spoke to the other for the rest of the tour, only focusing on the boys, both of us knowing that it wouldn’t be fair to ruin the day for them. We finished our tour, and it was finally time for us to go back to the resort. My feet hurt from the walking we did, and my head hurt from being around Natasha for that long. I focused so hard on not giving Billy anything to read into that I’d given myself a headache. The boys got on the bus to let me say goodbye to Natasha, and I knew Billy had himself pressed against a window somewhere to try and watch us to see if anything happened. But I was more concerned with the fact that the thought of saying goodbye to her made me want to throw up. I couldn’t think of anything worse than having to tell her goodbye, so I decided to take a risk and hope that it worked out the way I wanted it to.

“Come back with us,” I said, deciding to take my shot.
“What?” She asked with a frown.
“Come back with me.” I tried, praying my confidence didn’t waiver.
“What do you mean by that?” She asked slowly. 
“I want you to come back to my room. With me. I wasn’t lying when I said I missed you.” I said with a sigh.
“I have dreamed of the day that you would find me and say something along those lines.” She said, shaking her head.
“You have?” I questioned.
“Yes. Of course, I have. And then, when it became a decade of nothing from you but seeing your family Christmas cards on my parents’ fridge every year, I gave that dream up. You were clearly happy, and I was just a phase you were going through.” She said, staring at the ground.
“No, that’s not true. I wasn’t happy.” I argued.
“I can’t, Wanda. And please don’t ask me again.” She said with eyes that looked broken.
“Why?” I asked quietly.
“Because saying no to you once was hard enough.” She whispered, wiping away a fallen tear before pulling herself together to say goodbye to the boys.

She made her way onto the bus as if nothing had happened and talked to the driver to let him know that she wouldn’t be coming back; she just wanted to say goodbye to some people. I found a seat near the boys but kept my distance as she said her goodbyes. I could hear that her nose was stuffed from holding in her tears, but they were none the wiser. They happily said goodbye and waved to her before we made our way back to the room. My heart felt like someone had taken a knife and split it open so the blood was freely filling my chest. No amount of air I took in made me feel less suffocated, and my heart was racing. I knew that I couldn’t let the boys know that anything was wrong, so I held myself together until I made it to my room. Then for the second day in a row, I cried over the girl who always saw exactly who I was from the beginning and chose to love me still. My being at the park hurt her, it was clear. But I couldn’t let go of the idea that we belonged together. Maybe it was insane, and maybe I was insane, but my heart belonged to her if she wanted it. It had always been hers anyway.