Itachi-sama shows his smarts
As Itachi entered the student council room for the first time, he immediately headed to the president’s desk between the windows, not sparing a single glance to the cabinet filled with teas, coffee and hot chocolate powder or the table in the middle, decorated with fresh flowers or the just tasteful enough chandelier above it.
A little bit of tension left his rigid body as he pulled the chair from behind the president's desk and sat down upon it.
While the Uchiha was determined and straight-forward in each action, Kisame trailed behind him like a lost puppy, curiously looking at the room and its content. It still felt unreal to him. He never thought he would amount to anything more than the school’s main jock, but here he was. The student council's vice president.
He stared at the president from the corner of his eyes. He had yet to make sense of Itachi. He knew him only as a student; smart, serious, versatile and ready to help. But he didn’t know him as a person and he didn’t know why he chose him as his vice president. Everyone was sure he would either pick Nagato Uzumaki or Kakuzu Takikara, the only other students to rival him in intelligence - and sternness. But why didn’t he?
He took a deep breath and decided to break the icy silence between them.
“Well, now what?”, he asked and smiled broadly. Itachi stared at him with cold, almost bored eyes.
“After so many events and speeches, I sure hope you do remember our election promises. In contrast to many politicians, I intend to actually keep them.”
Kisame suppressed the urge to roll his eyes.
“Of course I remember them. I mean it literally, what are we going to do right now.”
Itachi opened his bag and pulled down a thick pile of papers, formulas and binders.
“Our predecessor was kind enough to give us copies from the last three months of his legislature, as well as the formulas that decide and appoint further members of the student council, that we will surely need. Other papers are pretty recent, from the time between the previous and the current one. I suggest that I go through last year's papers and you go through the recent ones.”
Kisame barely raised an eyebrow as he took the stack of papers. “Really getting into it from the start.”
Itachi stared at him. “I’m not sure I follow.”
The taller boy shrugged and smiled. “No champagne, no grand speech, just right beginning to work.”
The Uchiha opened his mouth, but Kisame cut him off with a lopsided grin. “Don’t worry, don’t worry, I know how important this stuff is…I’m just joking around.”
Itachi didn’t laugh. Instead he took off his glasses and intertwined his fingers.
Kisame groaned internally. He got into enough troubles with various teachers to know that he was about to hear the lecture of a lifetime.
“I understand that your athletic background and participation in many school clubs has given you valuable social skills and insights into the worries and moods of this school's students. This and your commitment and zeal for helping others are the reason I chose you for my vice president.”
Kisame couldn’t help but feel a gentle warmth flowing through his body. He had thought he had only been chosen as a sort of mascot to collect votes for the Uchiha, without actually respecting him as a person and colleague. But no, Itachi cares.
“However… I must remind you that we are the student council’s president and vice president. This is not one of your after school clubs without order and purpose. We have been elected by the people to help and guide them, to make this difficult and confusing phase in everyones lives a bit more bearable and to pave the way for the generations after us. And this means work. Hard work. Hard work without any distraction of any kind and this includes friendship, as harsh as that may sound. We have a huge responsibility to bear and there is no opening to any failure or unnecessary delays. So keep your stupid smirk out of this room!”, he hissed.
“Yeet!”
Kisame snapped out of his memories to watch a crumpled up paper ball fly in an elegant arch through the room and land in the trash can.
“Ah, yes!”, Itachi said with a triumphant smile.
Kisame looked at him, looked at the trash can which was surrounded by dozens of paper balls and then went back to Itachi.
“I’m not cleaning that mess up.”
“It’s not a mess…it’s the graveyard of my noble sacrifices which ultimately let me to achieve my ultimate goal!”, Itachi replied.
“The goal of throwing useless paper into the trash can?”
The Uchiha just shrugged and began to crumble up the next ball.
Kisame smiled, though it was a bit strained. “You’re in an awfully good mood today.”, he commented and Itachi raised his eyebrows.
“This sounds like that's the exception and not the rule.”
“Well, you can have your moods. A bit like a cat, really.”
Itachi laughed at that - a genuine, kind laugh that Kisame heard far too rarely for his taste.
“You are not the first to say that. Actually, most of my aunts and even Sasuke sometimes call me Meowtachi, though I have no idea when and why that started.”
Kisame chuckled. “That’s cute, maybe I should call you that too, president Meowtachi.”
Itachi glared at him, though a playful glint was in his eyes. “You wouldn’t.”
The vice president grinned predatorily. “Not only that - maybe I will tell Deidara as well.”
At this, Itachi actually paled.
“Just joking, just joking, you know that I wouldn’t put you through that hell. Though you did look rather scared…”
Itachi huffed and cleared his throat. “You must have been imagining things and of course I knew that you wouldn’t tell. I know you, after all.”
For a second Kisame was taken aback, though he wasn’t sure why. Of course Itachi knew him, they were in the same year and spent over six months working closely together as the president and vice president of the student council. Still, he felt strangely flattered.
“Really, you know me?”, Kisame asked with a teasing grin.
Itachi's expression sobered up. “Of course I do, you are my best friend after all.”
Oh.
Silence. Black eyes met yellow eyes before Itachi broke eye contact, seemingly embarrassed and returned his focus to the papers in front of him.
All the while Kisame’s heart beat louder than a horde of rampaging elephants. He swallowed thickly, he wasn’t aware that Itachi felt this way about him. He thought he was just a colleague to him, although the one he liked best. He didn’t even know he considered him a friend. Of course Kisame referred to Itachi as such, but he was known to wear his heart on his sleeve - in stark contrast to the icy Uchiha.
Clearing his throat he tried to elevate the heavy and awkward tension between them and he put on his most charming smile.
“Well, you can’t say such grand things without the proper proof and citation, right?”
Itachi looked up again and Kisame was sure he saw a quick flash of relief traveling over his features. “Well I can try to enter your name into JSTOR, but I doubt I would find much there.”
“Then you’ll have to bring proof with your own studies.”
Itachi smiled thinly at him. “I know you want to lead me to something specific, just spit it out.”
“Do you know the game of twenty questions?”, Kisame asked and before Itachi replied he bowed mockingly. “Of course you do, our enlightendness, why am I asking such foolish things?”
Itachi rolled his eyes, but his smile widened a bit more. “Twenty questions is a game in which one player thinks of any person or thing, while the other player has to guess the answer in twenty questions or less, though the first player is only allowed to answer with either yes or no.”
Kisame raised his eyebrows. “Did you memorize the dictionary entry by heart, or what?”
Itachi shook his head. “But I did play it a lot with Sasuke when we were traveling and he was bored. After a while we both became quite good at it.”
“I’m not sure this is a game that requires a lot of skill…”, Kisame said with a slightly condescending intonation.
Itachi only smiled. “I beg to differ. Let me prove it by using just half the questions. I can assure you I can find out anything you think of in only just ten questions.”
Kisames eyes narrowed in challenge and he took out a small sticky note and quickly scribbled a single word down. “Bring it on then.”
—
Itachi stared into his yellow eyes, his soul really, as his mind raced. He had played and won hundreds, if not thousands of rounds against Sasuke and his little brother probably had a more cunning and mischievous mind than his vice president.
“First question: Is it something that physically exists?”
“Yes.”, Kisame answered, his face uncharacteristically calm and blank.
So neither an abstract concept nor something fictional like Excalibur or the feather of Maat. Still, it doesn’t reduce the pool all too greatly. But… I think I have an idea… Kisame only suggested this game after I mentioned that I regard him as my closest friend, so the thing in question is most likely something close and personal to him. Well, that should make it a lot easier…
“Second question: Is it solid?”
Kisame seemed amused by the question. “Yes.”
So it can’t be any type of water or drink.
“Third question: Is it any type of sports equipment?”
He shook his head. “No.”
Alright, that does scratch quite a lot of things. And looking at the way he curls and opens his fists, he knows it too.
Itachi smiled confidently.
“Fourth question: Can you eat it?”
Kisame looked genuinely taken aback for a moment as he carefully weighed his two options.
“Uh…yes?”, he answered and raised his eyebrows both in doubt and possibly even concern.
“Fifth question: Would you eat it?”
“No!”
Hmm… I should have asked this first, now I wasted two questions just to discern whether it's food or not. But this too isolates the possible answer further.
“Sixth question: Is it a living being?”
“Yes.”, Kisame replied, or more truthfully, grumbled. Itachi's smile widened. He was getting very close and he was pretty sure he already knew what it was.
“Seventh question: Does it have hair?”
“Yes.”
"Eighth question: Does it have dark hair and eyes?”
“Yes.”
“Ninth question: Do you love it?”
Kisame stared at him. “Sorry?”
“Do you love it?”, Itachi repeated and after a second that stretched like eternity, Kisame nodded.
Itachi smiled broadened in an outright triumphant smirk, but Kisame, who he thought would be huff and fume at his imminent defeat looked strangely detached, frozen behind an unmoving, unfeeling face.
“Tenth and final question: Is it Samehada?”
A flash of emotion flickered across Kisame's face that Itachi could impossibly decipher, but then he smiled all teeth and crumbled the sticky note between his hands and threw it in the trash can, landing perfectly in the middle.
“Yup, you figured me out!”, he lied.
Today's result: Itachi-samas victory.