A Year and A Day

Music wafted out of the open doors of a bar, beckoning Sasuke and Sakura toward its welcoming atmosphere. They had been on the road for a few weeks and had finally made it to the last town in between the Land of Fire and the Land of Earth. Traveling to the Land of Earth from Konohagakure would take an average shinobi a few days, but Sakura’s insistence on seeing everything that her home country has to offer kept their pace slow. Sasuke knew the reason for her idling wasn’t really due to any tourist inclinations. She was reluctant to leave the Land of Fire because she didn’t know when she would return.  It was because of that that Sasuke remained quiet when she asked to stop at one last town.

The warm mid-spring evening added a charge to the air that even Sasuke couldn’t ignore. It reminded him of when he was younger, chasing butterflies in the backyard of his family’s estate while his mother fussed at him to come back inside. It was a feeling accompanied by the notion that there was never enough time to take it all in. He knew that this night would be no different.

The bar was a small affair with a dozen tables and a counter long enough to accommodate a few extra patrons. As they entered, they garnered a few stares from the rather busy room. Although they took every precaution to conceal their identities as shinobi, there was no hiding the fact that they were outsiders. Sasuke pointed out a small table toward the corner of the room and the two took their seats. A three-piece band finished up on the small stage and quickly moved to make room for the next group to perform. Sasuke couldn’t help but be impressed by the liveliness of the establishment, especially in such a modest town. 

He ordered for the both of them, two of the day’s specials, a bottle of sake, and a beer, and began to indulge in the meal. Eating rations every day made even simple restaurant faire seem gourmet.

“Since when did you start drinking?” Sakura asked, her face flush with the heat of alcohol. He never noticed how much she could look like her former teacher, Tsunade. He shook the thought out of his head and refocused on the conversation.

“I do sometimes, just not around you. I figured it would help us blend in better.”

She rolled her eyes. “You can have fun without having to justify it, you know.”

Sasuke took another swig of the cold beer and turned his attention away from Sakura. The last month had dulled his senses, as he felt himself slipping into a comfortable routine with his traveling partner. He was enjoying himself more than he had in years, but with that enjoyment came complacency and obliviousness. Having someone as capable as Sakura by his side calmed his nerves, but he knew there would come a time when he would need his sharpness. He wondered if he would be able to provide it.

The next band entered the stage, rallying up the local patrons and causing a few to rise to their feet for a dance. The raucous atmosphere of the place made him uneasy and he was about to suggest that they leave when he noticed Sakura rising from her seat, a grin spreading across her face. She moved to stand over him and grabbed his arm.

“Come on, we have to dance!” She said, tugging at the sleeve of his button-up.

“What? No, we can’t. It’s too crowded,” he protested.

She gave his arm one last tug with enough force to drag him to his feet.

“Just one song, I promise.”

He stood for a moment, observing her excited eyes and blushing cheeks. He then sighed and began to move toward the dance floor, causing Sakura to chuckle in delight. As he walked, he felt his legs move automatically as if separated from his body entirely. He would have never, not even in a thousand years imagined that he would be in the situation he now found himself in. Marching toward the open dance floor of a bar, a stomach full of beer and Sakura not far behind him. He chalked his decision up to the alcohol and continued forward.

The band started up a new song as he arrived at the edge of the dancers, and Sakura wasted no time jumping into the action. She swayed and moved in time with the upbeat rhythm, matching the style of those around her. He stood completely still, watching her as she lost herself in the moment. He was suddenly struck by a familiar feeling, one that had been haunting him over the past month. It came to him seemingly at random and he had no real comparison to speak of. He experienced it first one night while he was on watch, leaning on a tree while Sakura slept peacefully on her bedroll. He felt it again when she insisted that they watch a particularly beautiful sunset together, and again when she helped patch up his sprained ankle. He could only describe it as a knowing, a sensation that there was a fundamental truth hidden within all of those moments. The difficulty came in deciphering what that truth was.

He was jolted out of his thoughts by Sakura as she grabbed his hand and offered him a smile.

“You can’t just stand there. What happened to blending in?”

She pulled him in close and began to sway once again. “I’ll lead, you don’t have to do anything.”

The two began to move in harmony around the floor, drawing attention from some of the other gathered dancers. He had always hated being the subject of others' curiosity even when the intentions of the bystanders were harmless. But as he felt Sakura pressed close to him, his tension began to wane. Every moment spent with her made him feel as if he was sinking deeper and deeper into calm, dark waters. Her presence enveloped him whole and he wondered if there would come a time where he would reach a point of no return. He wondered if that would even be a bad thing.

As his worried eyes scanned the room for any potential dangers, his gaze stopped at a table full of rather brutish-looking men whose prying glares were undoubtedly fixed on him. He attempted to pretend he didn’t notice them, swinging Sakura around to the furthest spot away from the table. He leaned in closer to her and whispered into her ear.

“We’re being watched. Don’t let your guard down.”

“I’m sure it’s nothing, Sasuke. Probably just some creeps.” 

The song concluded and the two began back toward their seats. As they passed by the table Sasuke set his sights on, one of the men spoke up.

“Hey, now! You’re gonna keep that beauty all to yourself?”

His voice was gruff and grating. Paired with his balding head and crooked teeth, Sasuke thought he might be one of the most disgusting men he’d ever laid his eyes on. He glared at the man and attempted to usher Sakura past the table when one of the other men stood up and blocked their path. 

“What are you, deaf? We’re talking to you.”

The man’s breath reeked of alcohol, and Sasuke knew that the altercation would not end without a fight. 

“We don’t want any trouble. We were just leaving.” Sakura said, anger rising in her voice.

“Oh, you may not want any.” The second man slurred. “But, we want plenty. We know you aren’t from around here, so how about you ditch this idiot and come with us? I know how to show a lady a good time.”

He reached up to touch Sakura’s face and, in an instant, Sasuke threw out his hand to catch the man’s wrist. He clenched it hard, just enough to keep it in his grasp without breaking it. The action caused the others at the table to jump to their feet, drawing even more eyes from around the bar. 

The captured man gritted his teeth and glared. “You’re trying to be tough now, are you? Well, let me tell you something.” He leaned in closer and smirked. “I hate a man who’s too proud to share.”

In one swift motion and without hesitation, Sasuke twisted the man’s hand forward into an unnatural position. The bone broke instantly with a crack, so loud that it could be heard over the band’s music. The man howled out in pain, grabbing his now malformed hand as he leaned against the table. 

“Bastard!” He screamed. “You fucking bastard!”

Sasuke felt the other men closing in on him and whipped around to face the next assailant. The balding man threw a lazy punch, which flew past Sasuke’s face. He reciprocated by grabbing the man’s head and slamming it into the top of his knee, knocking him out cold. The next man, short with an overgrown beard, attempted to slam Sasuke into the ground by tackling his waist. He only managed to push the larger man back an inch before being flung into his own table, splashing glasses and plates onto the floor. 

Sasuke glanced over at Sakura just as she sent an attacker flying across the room with a chakra-infused punch. She looked over at him, clearly sobered from the altercation.

“We have to go!” She yelled.

“I know, I’m trying!”

The interaction let their guard down just enough for Sakura to miss the slightest movement coming from the man with the broken hand. The light of the room caught the black metal edge of a kunai, flashing a reflection right back at Sasuke. Time slowed, as the man lunged at Sakura from his place near the table. Sasuke grabbed her by the waist and quickly swung her away from the point of the kunai, shielding her body with his own.

Every shinobi possesses a natural instinct for self-preservation. It is the only way to ensure survival while participating in such a dangerous profession. Hesitation or the lack of that innate understanding determines the outcome of any fight, no matter the difference in skill or talent between opponents. Sasuke understood this principle from a young age and by the time he was a genin, he had mastered it. But now, there was an undoubtable shift in this instinct. It wasn’t dulled but extended beyond himself like waves dispersing over the shore. Every reaction now accounted not only for his own safety but for Sakura's as well. There were moments when this extension had struck him before when he was younger and more unpredictable. But now, it crept up on him anytime they faced adversity and that fact scared him far more than the sharpened edge of a weapon. He wasn't concerned that his instincts would fail him. He was instead afraid that they would fail her. It meant that failure in combat could result in a fate worse than his own death, and that simply could not happen.

He felt a sharp pain spread from a point in his side and he looked down to see that the man had managed to slash him. He quickly disarmed him and knocked him unconscious with a swift blow to the back of the neck. Sakura grabbed a hold of his shoulder, turning him around to see the now-bleeding wound.

"Why would you do that?" She said, a look of guilt spreading across her face.

"Stop worrying about me and go."

Sakura began to push past the crowd of bystanders with Sasuke close in tow when the room around him began to dip and turn unnaturally. He took another step but was quickly tossed to the side by his own unsteady body. He attempted to grab the edge of a table but undercorrected, sending him crashing into the floor. His mind raced as he tried to piece together the cause of his ailment but his ability to think straight was quickly waning. He looked up to see Sakura crouching in front of him, speaking words that he could no longer understand. The sounds of the room blended together into an unending ring as lights and colors blurred his vision. He felt hands lifting him up, dragging him somewhere he could not see. 

As the confusion reached an apex, he was surprised to suddenly be thrust back into clear reality. He stood on the street outside the bar, soft lights illuminating the completely empty space. The moon greeted him as he tried to make sense of his situation. He took a deep breath, composing himself as he gathered information from his unfamiliar surroundings. But when he attempted to focus his senses, he found them to be useless. He could feel no other presence at all and it was as if everything around him was coated in a static hue. 

“Sakura?” He called, his voice echoing off of the hallow walls around him.

He foolishly hoped that she could bring him back to an equilibrium, but there was no answer. He reached for his longsword at his side and noticed that he had been left unarmed. His pulse began to thump in his chest, anxiety threatening to blind him even further. Suddenly, he heard the sound of footsteps pittering along the stone street. He turned around to see an unlikely sight. A young boy stood with his back towards the older man, sauntering down the main thoroughfare of the small town. Sasuke thought he recognized the child at a glance, but shook off the idea in frustration.

“Hey! Where is everyone?” He said.

The boy stopped, turning his head slightly to acknowledge the voice behind him. His dark eyes reflected the orange glow of the streetlights, and at that moment Sasuke’s mind cleared. He took a step forward, causing the boy to turn around and dart toward a nearby alleyway.

“Wait! Stop!”

Sasuke raced after him, diving into the dark sidestreet as he kept pace with the uncomfortably familiar figure. The chase continued for an immeasurably long moment as the pursued led the pursuer down the winding village streets. Sasuke turned one final corner and found himself staring not at the boy, but at Sakura. Her bright, green eyes were darkened with a look of terror as she stared helplessly back at him. She wore an outfit that he had not seen her in years. The same red jacket and shorts that became a staple during his time away from the village. He narrowed his eyes in concern and took a step into the narrow alley, causing Sakura to stumble backward into the wall behind her. Her fearful reaction to his movement made his stomach lurch. It was one that he hoped he would never see again.

“It’s alright. Just, please tell me what’s happening. I can’t get us out of this if you don’t.”

He made his way closer to her until he stood just a few feet away. He held out his hand to help her up and tried his best to put on a calm demeanor. She stared up at him and reluctantly reached out toward him. Sasuke attempted to grab her outstretched arm but was suddenly interrupted by the sight of blue lightning erupting from his arm. The sound of thousands of sparrows pierced the air and caused Sakura to reflexively jerk backward. Sasuke stared at the chidori, wondering how it manifested against his will. He tried to end the jutsu, but the blinding light continued. 

“I’m sorry, I don’t know what’s going on.” The fear in his voice surprised him, and he tried his best to compose himself. “I’m not going to hurt you, I swear.”

He took a step back but was flung forward again by his own unconscious movement. He felt himself losing control of his entire body as if he was being controlled like a puppet on a string. He attempted to break out of the unknown grasp but could not summon up the willpower to overcome it. He watched helplessly as he continued his path forward and raised his hand over his head. He knew what would come next.

“No! Stop!” He begged, his voice trembling with shameless horror.

There was no reaction as he felt his arm thrust itself into Sakura’s chest, striking her through the heart with ease. He watched as she gasped one final time before going limp against him, and only then did he feel his body return to his own agency. He removed his arm from the wound and stared at his now-bloody hand, unable to comprehend his own thoughts. His breathing quickened to a racing pace as he held onto the lifeless body before him. Although it seemed impossible, he had seen the scene hundreds of times before. His guilty conscience plagued him with nightmares for years, filled with the same gruesome reality that greeted him now. But now he knew it was much too real to be another nightmare. 

He inhaled sharply once, then again before letting himself collapse into a painful rage. He screamed, long and unimaginably loud, before beginning to sob. His curses and indecipherable rambling cascaded back down on him in lingering echoes, which only increased his hysteria. He wanted only to lay down on the cold stone of the street and drift into a wakeless sleep, but he knew that mercy wouldn't be afforded to him. 

His outbursts continued for what seemed like an eternity when he felt a sudden presence looming over him. He lifted his head and squinted through his tear-filled eyes to see a familiar figure sillohuetted by the light of the moon above. His tremoring stare met the boy’s hate-filled eyes, his own eyes, which suffocated him in relentless misery. He wondered how he could have ever harbored that much resentment within himself. The boy reached down and grabbed him painfully by the hair, a mocking look of pity spreading across his face.

“Look at you. Pathetic.”

The boy threw Sasuke’s head down as if disgusted by the mere touch of him. He stood for a moment before crouching down, his face inches away. 

“You’ve lost your ambitions. You worked so hard to get stronger, so that you could crush them for taking everything away from you. Have you forgotten that?”

“You’re wrong.” Sasuke hissed. 

“Am I?” The boy interrupted. “Or are you just too dull to realize it?” Sasuke watched his eyes drift past him, landing on the lifeless body behind him.

“You could’ve killed her, do you remember that? After what you did to Karin-”

“Shut up.” Sasuke snapped, but the boy continued 

“You could’ve ended this a long time ago. You’re better off alone, you know that. You’re better off without Naruto and the others, and you’re better off without her.”

Sasuke lunged forward in an attempt to tackle the boy, his rage boiling over in an explosive burst. He landed face first onto the street as his chin collided with the pavement, sending a shock of pain up his spine. He recovered quickly, springing to his feet to see the boy now standing a few feet from where he once was. 

“Cut all ties, that’s what you said. Every last one. So do it, then. Keep your word.”

“It’s not the same as it was. Things are different now.” Sasuke said through pained heaves of breath.

The side of the boy’s mouth upended in a joyless smile as he began to saunter toward the older man.

“Different?” He scoffed. “Because you think that the village accepts you again? Or that you’re somehow a better person now?”

The boy stopped and met Sasuke’s glare.

“You’re no different than me, and you want to know something?” He leaned in closer, paralyzing Sasuke in fear. “You’ll never be anything else.”

Sasuke’s vision began to blur as his constitution failed him. He fell down to one knee before collapsing onto his side, his head throbbing with immeasurable pain. As he sunk deeper into unconsciousness, he saw the visage of the boy fading but his words remained. They echoed in his mind like something shouted into a great cavern, resonating in every part of his body until he was filled with reverberation. Then, at once, he consigned himself to the shameful truth about the ordeal. That he believed every word.

When Sasuke opened his eyes again he saw that he was no longer in the dark, mocking alleyway of the nightmare. Instead, he found himself in an unfamiliar room surrounded by golden morning light. The sensation of a soft embrace enveloped him, sinking deep into his bones and soothing him from the inside out. As his hearing returned, he was greeted with the only sound he wished to hear.

“You’re okay. Take a deep breath. You’re safe now.” 

He looked over to see Sakura, holding his upright frame gently against her own. She rested her head against his chest and continued her string of comforting words. Feeling continued to return to him and he suddenly sensed his shaking body and pounding head which only further confused his muddled mind. He put a hand on Sakura’s back, causing her to pull away from him in surprise.

“Sasuke? Are you…here now?”

Their eyes met and Sasuke could feel the sharp pricks of tears at the back of his eyes. He swallowed hard and pulled her back into an embrace, wrapping his arms around her neck as if she could disappear at any second.

She let out a sigh of relief. “Oh, thank goodness.”

She leaned into his embrace, tighter now, causing him to real back in pain. He looked down to see that his shirt had been removed and a bandage had been placed to cover a wound on his side. He struggled to remember how he could have gotten it, but eventually, the memories returned to him. The bar, the dancing, the fight, and then…

He looked away from her, hoping to hide his suffocating guilt. The altercation was just a dream but he wondered how that could have been true. He experienced everything in excruciatingly vivid detail, in a way that a nightmare simply couldn't provide. He wondered if the cause of the vision was a genjutsu, but he knew something that complex would require skills equal to his own. 

Sakura began to inspect him closely, her eyes narrowed in focus. She pressed her fingers to check his pulse just underneath his ear.

"You need to rest some more before you think about moving around," she said as she moved her fingers to his wrist. "Do you remember anything from the last few hours?"

He shook his head. "No. The last thing I remember is the bar. Then I started to feel ill before I lost consciousness."

Sakura took his chin in one hand and began to move his head around slowly, observing his eyes as she did so.

"I see. Well, besides dehydration I think you’ll be alright soon.” She removed her hand from his face and smiled.

“You’ve given me quite a night, that’s for sure.”

“What do you mean? What happened after the fight?” He asked.

Her smile faded as her nervous eyes moved toward her pack nearby. She reached in and pulled out an item wrapped in cloth, handing it over carefully. He took it and unwrapped it to reveal a familiar black kunai, its surface covered in a fine white powder.

“Poison?” 

She shook her head. “No, it’s a powerful hallucinogen. Strong enough to knock out a normal person for over twenty-four hours, if I had to guess. Luckily, it was in your system for only half that time.”

He stared at the kunai before wrapping it back up again.

“A dose delivered straight to the bloodstream, completely disorienting his opponent and giving him an easy win in a fight. What a cheap tactic.” 

He handed the weapon back to Sakura and laid back down on the tatami mat. He glanced around the room and noticed that it was the same inn that they had checked into the morning they entered town. It seemed that they couldn’t make it far in his current condition. A pang of guilt ran through him as he wondered what trouble he had caused her while he was unconscious.

Sakura rose to her feet and turned toward the door.

“Well, now that you’re doing better I should head over to the shop downstairs to grab us something to eat. Is that alright?”

He turned his head to look at her. Her nonchalant attitude failed to hide her tired eyes. It had been a long night for the both of them.

“Will you be fine going out by yourself? We haven’t gotten kicked out of town by now?”

She waved her hand dismissively. “Oh, no. Apparently, those guys had been causing trouble in town for weeks now. We were just the first to take care of the problem.”

He nodded and listened as she continued toward the door before stopping just short of it.

“Can I ask you something?” She asked, still facing away from him.

“Ya, what is it?”

“When you fell under the effects of that drug last night, what did you see?”

He thought for a moment how he should respond, weighing his options carefully. If he lied, he could save himself from the painful conversation of explaining the vision he experienced. But did she really deserve to be lied to again? If he told the truth, he would be sharing a part of himself that he was afraid to disclose. The part that believed that he really hadn’t changed at all, that he was still the same heartless coward he was when he was sixteen. 

He turned away from her and made his decision. “A nightmare, that’s all. The same one I’ve had for years now. You don’t have to worry about it.”

“Did it involve me?” Her words were eerily soft as if trying her hardest not to intrude. “It’s just that you were talking in your sleep and I thought that I heard you say my name.”

She turned around and put up both of her hands apologetically. 

“I mean what am I saying? I’m badgering you for no reason, and-.”

“Ya,” he interrupted. “I did see you. I always do.”

She stared back at him.

“So, you only see me in nightmares?”

“No, that’s not true.” He braced himself for what he would say next. “You’re in my worst dreams and my best.”

She smiled shyly, color rising slightly in her cheeks. She moved back over to where he lay and sat next to him, grabbing his hand and holding it in her own. 

“I’m sorry for bringing it up. You don’t have to justify yourself. I know you can’t control stuff like that.”

“Why are you apologizing?” He asked, his voice rising in annoyance. “Why should you continue to treat me like this when I never once tried to apologize to you?”

There was a brief pause, and Sasuke thought that he may have driven the conversation into a wall. He wondered if that was his intention all along. To his surprise, Sakura continued.

“You don’t have to apologize to me, not for anything that you’ve done. Because the truth is, I’ve forgiven you for everything. I forgave you the moment that you left the village, and again when we saw each other at Orochimaru’s hideout after all that time.” She paused. “Even that day on the bridge, after the Five Kage Summit. I knew deep down that nothing you could do could make me resent you.”

She laughed dryly. “How pathetic is that?”

He held onto her words like water flowing through his fingers. He was used to the feeling of being forgiven. It was something that he hated, the idea that others could look past his faults and his mistakes and see someone better on the other side. It was part of the reason why he fled the village so soon, without the chance to face those he had left behind. Out of all of them, Sakura’s forgiveness hurt most of all. It reminded him that throughout all of the trials of the last few years, she had been there waiting for him. Wishing for him to return to her while he spent his days considering how he should destroy everything she cared about. It was an awful feeling, being given something that he knew he would never be deserving of.

“I don’t deserve that,” he admitted. 

“You do, Sasuke.” She squeezed his hand tightly. “The reason I forgave you so quickly is because I knew that you would never forgive yourself. I hoped that when you did come back to us, I could be there for you no matter what. I wanted to show you that you don’t have to hold onto your guilt forever.”

Her eyes finally met his own and he felt the familiar sensation of knowing once again, stronger than he ever had before. He wondered if he could ever bring himself to believe her, that he was somehow worthy of her kindness. Worthy of being accepted back into the village as a friend. Worthy of being someone that others could trust. The pain of the last few years held his soul in its grasp, but with every passing moment, he could feel its grip loosening. He hoped that there would come a time when it would release him completely, whether it be for just a moment or for the rest of his life.

He felt Sakura release his hand and rise from the floor.

“Sorry to get so serious like that. I know big talks have never been your thing. I’ll be back soon, okay?” 

He nodded as she left the room. He wanted to ask her to stay by his side for as long as she could take, but he squashed the impulse and stayed silent. He contemplated what kind of man he was becoming. The kind that would admit to wanting company after so many years of being alone. He placed his hand on his bare chest and took in the feeling of his own beating heart. 

The two spent the rest of the day lounging in the small room, recuperating from the fight at the bar and the long night afterward. Sasuke learned that his body hadn’t been motionless while he experienced the effects of the kunai’s drug. Sakura took amusement in recalling her attempts to drag him back to the inn as he thrashed about at nothing. For her, the night had just been a small hiccup in their travels. They both made it through relatively unharmed, with only a small slash to speak of.  But for Sasuke however, the altercation had dredged up feelings that he could no longer ignore. Between the hallucination and the conversation afterward, there was no shortage of unspoken emotions teeming within him. 

For hours, he laid staring at the now-dark ceiling waiting for sleep to come to him. Restlessness led him to his feet as he made his way toward the door of the room. He slipped on his shoes and coat before departing silently into the night. He traveled the empty streets out of town, taking in the clear late-summer sky in earnest. He hoped that it would help clear his overactive mind but the sight of the full moon only clouded him with more unwanted thoughts.

As he wandered through the woods, he came across a large tree that stretched far above the others around it. With a few short bounds, he made his way up toward one of its large branches and stopped to overlook the valley below. In the morning, he and Sakura would cross into the Land of Earth and enter a new era of their journey. He wondered if being in a new environment would change things between them. He feared that if he continued to keep everything he wished to say to her to himself, she would eventually find out who he really was. Someone that couldn’t even express the simplest emotion to a person that he cared about so dearly. Someone who simply wasn’t worth the trouble. 

He was drawn out of his thoughts by the presence of someone approaching. He placed one hand on the hilt of his sword and braced himself. 

“There’s no need for that. It’s just me.”

He turned to see Sakura following his path up the tree, landing next to him with a few small boxes in her hands. 

“I knew you’d be out here somewhere. You can’t sleep?”

He eyed the boxes before turning back to face the moon ahead of them.

“What’s all that for?” He asked nonchalantly.

“You didn’t eat dinner so I figured you’d be hungry.” She took a seat on the branch and laid out a small cloth before arranging a few bento boxes on top of it. “If you’re going to be out here this late, you might as well eat.”

He rolled his eyes and smiled. “You worry too much, you know that?”

She looked up at him and narrowed her eyes in annoyance. “If I don’t, then who will? You barely look after yourself to begin with. Now, sit.”

He obliged, taking a seat next to her and grabbing a pair of chopsticks off of the cloth. The two sat in silence, enjoying their meal while the night's breeze swayed their meeting place to and fro. 

"If we both can't sleep, why don't we just head towards the Land of Earth tonight?" Sakura said as she looked across the valley. "It's right there, isn't it?"

“Didn’t you stay up all night?” He asked. “You should rest before we leave.”

“Now look at who’s worrying too much.” She jeered as she placed her gentle hand on his.

Sasuke’s face grew hot with embarrassment as he turned away from her. He wanted to run away from the situation entirely, deeper into the woods where he could continue to keep his emotions at bay. But what good would that do him? Wasting away all while hoping his silence would be enough for her when knew she deserved much more than that. He just couldn’t bring himself to speak to her, no matter how hard he tried. 

At that moment, an idea crept up on him from the back of his mind. Words may fail him, but what if actions could fill the void? They were a language that he spoke well, and one that Sakura understood better than anyone. If he could communicate to her through other means, then perhaps he could say what she deserved to hear. The question was how would he do it? What could convey all of the things he had been holding back from her? 

He turned back around and was suddenly dumbstruck by the mere sight of her. The moonlight glinting off her green eyes, a small smile on her face, her hair blowing softly in the breeze. He had been to so many countries, seen so many grand sights and landscapes. There was simply nothing that compared to the view he had now. He watched as she turned to meet his stare, knowing exactly what he had to do. He leaned toward her, grabbed her face gently, and kissed her. 

The weight of the last twenty-four hours lifted, leaving him feeling so light that the softest breeze could have swept him away into the night air. It was then that he realized that he was never really sinking, falling into dark depths until he could no longer see the light above. He was instead ascending to the surface, slowly and peacefully drifting upward until he could feel the sunlight on his face again. He drank in his first breaths and smiled, pulling away from her to see that she was smiling too.

“I’m sorry,” he said.

“What for?” She responded as she pulled him in for another kiss.

As the moment continued, he hoped that she could understand him. Understand that she was the most important thing in his life. That he would do anything to keep her by his side, even if he knew he didn’t deserve her. That he finally realized what the feeling of knowing meant, what the truth he was searching for actually was. That he loved her and he knew she loved him too.