Itachi Uchiha awkwardly patted the shoulder of blonde who was crying hysterically against his chest.
His partner, and fiancée, Izumi Uchiha (FAQ answers – No, we’re not that closely related and no, we aren’t married yet.) was trying to get her to answer some questions. “Miss, what is your name?”
The sobbing blonde hiccupped and lifted her face off Itachi’s chest. “Ino. Ino Yamanaka.”
Izumi smiled encouragingly. “Hello, Ino. I’m Conservation Officer Izumi. This is my partner, Conservation Officer Itachi. I have to ask this, but didn’t you see the signs on the fence declaring the area off limits.”
“Yes, but…but we thought it wouldn’t hurt if we just went in a few meters…”
Izumi’s smile was customer service polite, but her tone could have frozen the whirlpools of Uzushio. “So, you thought that the tall fence with the signs that said ‘Forest of Death – no trespassing’ meant that it was okay to enter?”
“We thought that name wasn’t serious!” wailed Ino.
Itachi was fairly certain that if this woman went to the United States and visited the National Park called Yellowstone, she’d try to pet the ‘fluffy cows.’
Izumi continued to smile as she made some notes on her tablet.
Itachi was thankful it wasn’t turned against him. And their co-workers seriously thought he was the ‘bad cop.’
“And where exactly did you and your friend enter the Forest of Death?” queried Izumi.
“Um…um…the area about a kilometer down the road that way.” Ino pointed towards the Southwestern corner. “It was across from the cemetery entrance.”
Izumi looked up from her tablet “And what was the name of your friend and what does she look like?”
“Sakura Ha..Haruno. She has pink hair and green eyes and she’s about my height.” Ino choked on another sob.
“Thank you. And did you see what carried Sakura off?”
“It was a tree! I didn’t know tree could moooovvvveeee!”
“Yes, well, that’s why it’s called the Forest of Death. Can you describe the tree?” Ino shook her head. Izumi sighed and tucked her tablet away. “Alright. My partner and I will try and rescue your friend, but I have to warn you that the chances of her still being alive are slim.”
Ino’s response was a shrill scream that pierced Itachi’s ear drums like an ice pick. He pried the blonde off him and into the arms of one of the medics that had just arrived.
He walked to the back of Izumi’s truck and looked at her. “Did you have to tell her that?”
Izumi snorted as she slammed the tailgate shut. “They ignored signs and had to actually climb over a two-and-a-half-meter chain-link fence to get in there. I have zero fucks to give.”
Itachi sighed. “Well, this is the tenth person this year.”
“So far.”
“So far.” concurred Itachi.
Itachi went to his own truck and got his own equipment on. By silent agreement, they didn’t bother driving. The nearest official entrance was close enough to walk.
The pair got to the gate and unlocked it. They carefully made sure to lock it behind them. The Gods forbid some other idiot thought they could enter.
They began walking the perimeter, staying close to the chain-link, looking for signs of where the two women entered the Forest. After 10 minutes of walking, they found what they were looking for.
Footprints entering the Forest.
They took simultaneous deep breaths. Izumi unsheathed her machete while Itachi made sure his weapon was prepped and ready to go. Warily watching their surroundings, they followed the footsteps until they found where the attack occurred.
Itachi stood guard as Izumi carefully picked up the scattered remains of a fashionable backpack and its contents. After getting the pieces stowed away in an evidence bag, Izumi turned her gaze back to the forest floor. Pointing down she spoke “Look.”
Itachi nodded. “Wisteria.”
“Yeah. Let’s go.”
The pair followed the tracks. And found more signs.
A shoe.
Pieces of clothing.
An arm.
Then, as they entered a clearing, was a wisteria tree. From the crunching noises they could hear coming from its trunk, this was the tree they were looking for. Its branches thrashed angrily at the sight of the humans invading its domain. But when Itachi pointed the wand of his flamethrower at the tree, it froze briefly then backed away to the farthest point of the clearing.
Izumi spoke slowly. Most of the flora in the Forest of Death while dangerous were barely sentient. Wisteria trees being the exceptions. “Is there anything left of the human that you seized?”
The wisteria’s branches rustled then a round pink, beige and bloody object was thrown at them. It rolled to their feet. Izumi used a booted foot to stop it from rolling further.
She picked up the head by its hair. Itachi could see that what remained of the face was frozen in terror. Izumi dropped it into another evidence bag.
“Thank you.”
At that, they carefully backed out of the clearing and made their way back to the fence. After that, they made their way quickly back to the gate, unlocking it, making their way through then locking it back up.
They made their way back to where they left their trucks. Thankfully, the other woman was taken away but waiting for them was Itachi’s father, Fugaku, who was the Commander of the Konoha Conservation Corps. With him was Minato Namikaze, who was the CEO of the Konoha Archaeological Preservation Site.
“What did you find?” asked Fugaku.
Izumi shrugged off her backpack and held it out. “An arm and her head.”
Minato sighed sadly. “Well, that’s more than the last one.”
“I don’t think the wisteria liked the taste of hair dye.” Said Itachi quietly.
Fugaku snorted. “Take the remains to the morgue so that Tsunade can make the official identification. Then write your reports.”
“Yes, sir.”
As they walked back to their respective trucks, Izumi swung the backpack back over her shoulder then asked “So, love of mine, what do you want for dinner?”