When Naruto opened up his texts, he was planning on ignoring the link sent by his manager, until she followed up with “lmao better luck next time~!” It was that kind of cryptic shit that really pissed him off, and even though he knew that was probably her tactic to get him to open it sooner rather than later, he couldn't stop himself from doing so anyway.
It was a NextGen video link. He groaned: he had forgotten NextGen’s annual “Ten Hottest Faces of the Internet” dropped earlier this morning, when he had been filming a commercial for Fire Country’s most popular bottled tea company. Despite himself, Naruto opened up the video link, and quickly jumped through the video, scanning this year’s top picks. Some were obvious mainstays. Naruto snickered as Nara Shikamaru’s face came up at #8; they had actually been friends in grade school, and Shikamaru had had no interest in fame unlike his friend, but somehow went viral last year as Konoha’s most good-looking, stoic weatherman. Women went crazy for his classic catchphrase, “How troublesome.” Higher up on the list were folks he expected to see, like the alluring lead singer of the visual kei band Akatsuki had made it onto the list for the fifth year in a row. Naruto saw a glimpse of #3 and decided to skip it. His heart felt heavy still at the thought of seeing that stupid idiot.
For a brief moment, he relished his appearance on the Internet Ikemen list at #2, listening to the host’s gushing summary: “The visual of his group, Uzumaki Naruto is the second member of Shin_obi to grace our list, narrowly edging out his team leader with that killer smile, great tan, versatility as rapper and singer, and incredible dance moves. He had a flaming hot debut with his group last year and now he’s doing the same on NextGen’s Ten Hottest Faces of the Internet. Rumor has it he’ll be releasing a solo debut soon, and we cannot wait for him to take the internet by storm!”
The young idol pumped his fist in the air. "Yosh!" He'd only officially debuted for a year and a half and already he was making the splash he had always known he could. He couldn't wait to run this in the face of the CEO next time he saw that old geezer.
Wait. How come I'm not number one?
Naruto pressed play again. “And this year’s number one Ikemen, as voted by NextGen’s illustrious panel of judges is…video game streamer Scarecrow!” On a dark background a white porcelain fox mask with a gloomy expression came into view, bright red paint around the eyes and marking distinctive whiskers on either side. A mess of silver hair framed the mask, like a wolf's mane. "While Scarecrow has long been known in competitive gameplay circles, he recently caught the attention of young women and men everywhere when edits of his championship win at Jonin, the internet's top fighting game tournament, went viral. Unless you’ve attended Jonin, few have seen him in person and he's always been masked, but that's part of the allure with Scarecrow!"
Are you kidding me?
This is not how things was supposed to go. Sakura and Naruto had been running themselves ragged to line up the perfect promotional cycle for Naruto’s solo debut, and establishing himself as the ‘visual of visuals’ was a crucial part of the plan. For this complete streaming rando to overtake that title on this ranking list was beyond comprehension.
Naruto quickly scrolled down to skim the comments, pulling out the ones that praised him obviously and those that elevated this stupid Scarecrow guy:
“So handsome!!”
“Kyaaa, Scarecrow! He’s just as fit as any idol!”
“He’s so mysterious with the mask, but somehow I never want him to take it off~”
“I agree, but there’s no way he’s not handsome under the mask; you can hear it in his sexy, low voice!”
Before he could get any more annoyed about the situation, a thought suddenly popped into Naruto’s head. ‘Fuck it. If you can’t beat them…’ He hit the phone icon on his screen.
A lively giggle greeted him. “Good job, number two! You’re only second to some guy who’s probably AI-generated.”
“Shaddup, Sakura. I’m done with my shoot. You picking me up?”
Sakura sighed. “For once, I wish I were. Then we could go try that new tornado omelette spot. Kiba’s drama audition is going long, so I actually need to stay here until I can speak to the director. You’re on your own, kid. Need anything?”
Naruto paused. “Well, actually…what do you know about Scarecrow? Think he’s open to collabs?”
“Ooh! My little trainee is growing up! You’re only one step behind me. Aside from his livestreaming platform, Scarecrow doesn’t have any other social media and I can’t find a contact for a manager. Seems like he’s really just a gamer and not an influencer.”
Naruto groaned. What a geezer.
“I’ll keep looking if you’re interested though.”
“Sure. Thanks, Sakura-chan.”
“That’s Manager-san to you. Ah, there’s the director. I’ll talk to you later.”
Naruto intended to drop it at first, but for whatever reason, it really freaking bothered him that if it weren’t for this stupid masked streamer, he would have easily been number one! It seemed like the only way to contact this stupid man would be to wait for his next livestream on Thursday, jump into the comments announcing his famous self, and use that to get Scarecrow’s attention. Scarecrow would be in awe that an idol was reaching out, they’d do a collaboration, and everyone would see that Naruto was clearly the more handsome one, so he could be cemented as number one for the fall promotional cycle, at least. It was a foolproof plan.
So Naruto waited until Thursday finally rolled around. It shouldn't have been difficult, because Sakura had packed his schedule with dance practice, workouts, and a variety show taping. But even between breaks, he felt restless, checking his calendar to see the distance between him and 9pm when Scarecrow would go live.
Sakura had been kind enough to end his schedule at 7pm that day, two hours of dance practice with his choreographer. Sai was a giant pain in the ass, a cold young man who had made a name for himself as one of the best dancers in the industry. He was the same age as Naruto, but he quickly rose in rank because he preferred to be behind the scenes, which was all for the best because sometimes the pale man said the most out of pocket shit. No amount of media training would ever make Sai suitable for unstructured (or structured) interviews. Naruto both hated their sessions together because Sai was unrelenting in criticism and pace, but also appreciated that very few people in the company gave him and the other idols such direct feedback nowadays.
Naruto took the company van with his colleagues back to their respective apartments. Neji and Shino had their earpods in as usual. Kiba and Naruto both gave in a little to their usual ribbing, but even that quickly gave way to quiet on the ride home. While they once used to all bicker frequently in their trainee days, the brutal regimen and lifestyle that led to their becoming Shin_obi, one of the country's most popular idol groups, had forced them to put aside difference in service of a common goal (becoming successful) and common enemies (the insane schedule Sakura put them on, rival groups within their label and at other companies, crazy stalker fans). Things had also chilled recently with the recent defection of their former leader, but none of them were ready to acknowledge the absence of their fifth member quite yet.
Naruto yawned loudly as he entered his modestly sized apartment, stripping out of his sweaty, baggy clothes he preferred for dance practice and immediately starting up the shower. He sang loudly and joyfully as he washed up. Even though singing was part of his job responsibilities, Naruto was grateful that he genuinely enjoyed both singing and dancing even when the job got hard. He knew he wasn't the best out there. He certainly didn't come close to Neji's smooth tenor or Kiba's resonant belting, and Shino has a surprising sweetness to his tone. (Then of course, there was the perfect clarity of their former leader, but he tried to push that thought out of his mind.) His own voice sounded more like a brook babbling over ragged pebbles than the smooth rivers of his idol mates, but Naruto loved hearing and joining in on beautiful harmonies, being part of something bigger than himself. The only thing he appreciated more than a good voice was a good bowl of ramen.
Three hit singles in the shower and a fresh, oversized t-shirt over his boxers later, Naruto wandered into his kitchen and started boiling water for dinner. He was supposed to be on a strict diet with the other members, but twice a week he cheated anyway with a bowl of instant or actual ramen. His manager had long given up on persuading him otherwise, and honestly, it had not made any meaningful difference in his popularity. Fans found him lovable whether he was cut like the rest of Shin_obi on their miserable diets or a little round-faced, his distinctive whiskers became even more notable. In fact, he gleefully pointed out to a resigned Sakura-chan, his gleeful, ‘chubby’ portraits had the highest value on the photocard market, flipping at 217% of their initial value.
Naruto still had some time to kill before the livestream. He shook the soup flavoring packet before ripping it open and scattering it over his curly ramen noodles. Then he grabbed a handful of finely sliced scallions and an ajitsuke egg from the refrigerator, neatly placing it on top before pouring the water from his electric kettle over everything. It wasn’t the same as Teuchi-san’s ramen from Ichiraku, but it would do. Naruto was already anticipating his next day off next week, which would be his last one for a while once his promotional schedule for his solo debut picked up.
Okay. He was clean. He had ramen. He had a few minutes before the livestream.
Naruto opened up his burner account on Otogakure, the latest and most popular SNS platform where users posted short clips of themselves with fast edits and overlaid unique sounds. Shin_obi’s singles had all done very well as sounds on Oto and Sakura had them on a regular content calendar to post choreography challenges to their songs or others. Even if Naruto had had the time to be on social media for personal reasons, he rarely ever felt called to be on it.
Before he could stop himself, he was typing in “Scarecrow unmasked.” A grid of videos showed up, all of them clearly oriented towards clickbait. The top result, however, said “Scarecrow’s Sexy Body Fancam @ Jonin!” and had over a million likes. He tapped on it with his thumb.
The video was shaky and it was difficult to tell where the viewer should be focusing their attention at first, as it depicted a large stage with a small handful of people sitting on stage in front of a computer monitor. Luckily, Naruto was used to unsteady fancams. The announcer yelled, “our top contender, Scarecrow!” and the camera cut left as a man walked from the crowd up the stairs and zoomed in. Scarecrow was a tall man, and Naruto felt a pang of jealousy as he approximated the guy’s height at around 180cm when he stood next to his opponent, competitive gamer, competitive eater, and occasional variety show guest Akimichi Chouji. He dressed simply in midnight blue joggers and a black long-sleeved knit shirt that fit so well it seemed like it had been tailored to his body. For whatever reason, he wore fingerless gloves but it seemed like the remaining exposed skin seemed fairly pale, as most of the gamers there were. Even with the stupid fox mask on, Naruto had to admit he could see the appeal. This guy looked like a freakin’ model based on stature alone. The idol hit the back button and tried to trawl through other videos on Oto, but very few gave him much more to go on, elaborate cuts of the same video with different songs. The blond couldn’t decide if he was grateful or irritated when an edit included a Shin_obi song.
Whatever. He’d get this guy soon enough.
Nine o’clock came around and Naruto finally logged onto the video game platform on his laptop. He didn’t use Raikiri as a livestreaming service very often, as it was more preferred by gamers than idol fans, but Kiba had made an account on his behalf a while back when he had wanted his friend’s blue eyes to get a look at this beautiful Raikiri streamer with great tits. He hadn’t been particularly interested in her or the livestreaming service back then and he hadn’t even thought of the platform until the last few days. Now, he logged in as Dattebayo and navigated to Scarecrow’s streaming page. He laid back in his bed, waiting for the page to refresh.
Scarecrow has started livestreaming. The white fox mask appeared on the screen, seeming almost disembodied against a black chair and dark, blurred background. A stream of excited comments cascaded down the right side of the screen.
Okay, this was it. Time to wait through some boring gameplay from this weirdo and–
"Oh-ha- yo ."
Oh, fuck.
The moment he heard that voice, the hairs on Naruto's neck stood on end. Scarecrow had a very pleasant voice, low and smooth and almost sultry .
"Welcome, or welcome back. This is Scarecrow, reporting for duty. Tobirama22, marumarukonoha, the usual crew, thank you for your monthly subscriptions to the page so I don't have to waste my time or your time with groveling. We can get right into the gameplay. It’s been a while since I’ve done a traditional combat format and the subscribers voted for a return to Shinobi World War III, so that’s what’s on the docket tonight.”
Naruto winced as it became apparent that the hairs on his neck weren’t the only things standing at attention. Despite his ardent desire to deny that anything was happening right now, the front of his boxers were forming a not so subtle tent, heat pooling in his lower abdomen. He closed his eyes, willing his hard-on to go away.
This was so unserious. Sure, his label had made him sign a very strict no-dating contract. Sakura packed his days end-to-end with activities so he hardly had a chance to breathe. And it had been a while since he had even had the time to find anyone attractive. Plus, he was in the peak of his young adulthood. He couldn’t remember the last time he had a moment to jerk off. And he hadn’t had any kind of physical intimacy with anyone since, well—
Scarecrow’s voice cut through his thoughts. “Hnnh. There you go, on your fuckin’ knees.”
Oh, fuck this .
The blond palmed the aforementioned tent, the front of his boxers already wet from precum. The part of Naruto’s brain that should have felt shame at jerking off to a very non-pornographic livestream of a military combat video game completely shut off as he kept his eyes closed, slipping into a haze as his brain filtered out most of the sounds of weapons clashing and NPC groans, listening only for that delightfully sexy voice.
“Alright then, down we go.”
Shedding his boxers so they hung off of one ankle, Naruto grabbed for the lube in his drawer. He squirted a cool dollop on his palm and took his very hard dick in one smooth move. With a shuddering sigh, he turned the volume down and closed his eyes again.
With the volume low, Scarecrow’s words were hardly intelligible and Naruto’s attention shifted to its melodic ups and downs. The man had a distinct lilt to his phrases, like he was always trying to tease something out of you, push you closer to your edge. Naruto imagined a hand in a black fingerless glove, the thumb tracing small circles into the divot of his hip as his own hand slid up and down his shaft, developing a fraught, ragged rhythm. His breathing was getting heavier, his face warm and assuredly flushed.
A low whistle and then— “We’re looking good tonight, aren’t we?” Scarecrow’s voice slithered into Naruto’s ears. The adrenaline rushed down his face and straight into his hips, where he’d begun to buck into the slippery, wet hold of his palm. He wished desperately that a larger body and cock were pressed right up against him, pinning him down. He had no face to imagine, but he hoped there was a serious, lidded expression as someone’s dark eyes gazed down at him, willing him to keep going.
There was a thrumming of gunfire and then he heard Scarecrow make a guttural groan, and it was only half a moment later that it was his own throat letting loose their own groans. “Goddamn it, no, no, not yet, shitshitshitshitSHIT! FUCK !”
With that, Naruto’s body seized up. A flash flooded his body and vision as he felt heat spreading across his belly. He let out a long exhale as he opened his eyes and stared upward at the empty ceiling. Shadow and light reflected from the apartment complex pool danced above him. He couldn’t think anymore. His head was entirely empty.
He continued to lay there for a good while, the sound of video gameplay and a stranger’s rough voice washing over him like ocean waves.
Forget ever meeting the man; Naruto didn’t think he could ever live down meeting a complete stranger who a) not only one-upped him in a Ikemen poll, but b) apparently had a voice that made Naruto fantasize about getting fucked to kingdom come.
(Heavy emphasis on come).
The next morning, he meant to text Sakura to forget about trying to hunt down Scarecrow’s contact information. It would really be too humiliating to face this stranger and Naruto wanted to move on with his life. So what if he wasn’t the internet’s most handsome man this year? He’d be fiiiinneee .
But he had quickly forgotten about it when he climbed into the company van because Neji had handed him a phone and commanded him, “Read.”
Naruto was going to gripe about the long-haired man’s tone but his eyes skimmed the headline: Former boyband star enlists in the military after signing with Missing-Nin Entertainment . He continued to read the opening paragraph of the article.
“The former leader of Shin_obi, one of the country’s leading idol groups last year, Uchiha Sasuke announced today that he would be beginning his required military service next month. This news comes as a surprise to many after his sudden and recent departure from both his group and label as he signed a new contract with Missing Nin Entertainment. Along with his older brother, Uchiha Itachi, lead singer of visual kei band Akatsuki, Sasuke has lived a rocky and tormented life ever since the untimely deaths of his family members in the terrorist attacks that targeted the wealthy Uchiha Corporation fourteen years ago.
“While Sasuke himself declined to make a statement, label president Nagato asked fans to continue showing Sasuke their love and support until he…”
His heart dropped into his stomach as he looked at his three remaining idolmates. They all looked as forlorn and dejected as Naruto himself felt and must’ve looked.
The car ride to the company headquarters was silent. When they arrived, Sakura waved them out. She looked more like an idol herself than a manager with glittery butterfly clips adorning her pink hair and her silvery, holographic heeled lace-up boots.
She pursed her mouth as she saw the four of them clamber out of the van, each more stoic than the last. “I take it you read the news this morning.”
They nodded.
“Hey. Look at me.” She waited she had all of their attention. “Remember how I used to be in love with him? Like, I grew out my hair for all of my teens because I heard some dumb rumor in the company that he only liked girls with long hair?”
They nodded again.
“Okay. Well. I’m telling you this: to hell with that guy.” She stomped one shimmery foot. “He abandoned us. He’s got his own shit to figure out. I’m not waiting around for him and neither are you. Got it?”
Naruto couldn’t help a thin-lipped smile just as much as Sakura couldn’t help the tears rimming her eyes.
“Okay. We got it, Sakura-chan.”
“Good.” With that, she pulled out four pieces of paper from her clipboard. “Here’s your schedule for today then. Can you all head to the gym for assessments with your trainer? Naruto, I’d like you to hang back for just a second and walk with me. There’s someone I’d like you to meet.”
Shino, Neji, and Kiba waved their goodbyes as they walked down into the building. Sakura began to lead the blond around the company’s perimeter to the enclosed courtyard where they sometimes had lunch.
“What’s up? Who am I meeting?”
“Ah well, you know how last week the Internet Ikemen rankings dropped and you lost to a fox mask? And you were interested in a collaboration with him, maybe?”
A sheepish laugh immediately erupted from Naruto’s lips. “Ahehehe, yeah…about that, Sakura-chan, actually, I was thinking maybe it wasn't such a good ide—”
The pink-haired woman carried on, having not heard anything he had said. “So I decided to do some digging, right? Because like, what guy on the internet with a million followers and two gaming championships under his belt has no SNS? It’s so weird!”
“I mean, plenty of people don’t care that much about social—”
“—I was intrigued. So I decided to watch his livestream last week, he was playing some dumb ninja warfare game, whatever, I’m sure you were using your time more wisely than me—”
“Um, not exactly—”
“—but then, it started to dawn on me. I had heard this voice before!”
A growing pain was starting to gnaw at Naruto’s stomach as the panic started to sink in. Well, that could mean anything, right?
“You recognized him? Is he like, uh, a voice actor or something?”
Sakura finally acknowledged his words, turning around and taking his hand in both of hers. “No! Even better! I used to know him! Still had his email address saved and everything!” Her light green eyes sparkled in the morning light.
“Really?” Even Naruto could tell his voice was high-pitched and strained. “What a coincidence,” he said through gritted teeth.
Then, a chill went straight down Naruto’s spine as he felt a tall presence behind him.
This couldn’t be happening. No.Nonononono.
But he couldn't deny that voice, coming from behind him, so close and so present, as if those words were skimming right across his earlobe. “Sakura-chan. Yo. ”
No. Goddamn. Way.
“Naruto, meet Scarecrow!”