dry whetstones
There was something in Sakura’s head.
A piercing split gripped her mind, and the ground beneath her feet was slipping away as a force tugged at Sakura’s brain. Black spots danced across the genin’s vision, and before she could slip into a dark bliss, an eager murmur caught her attention.
“I’ve got you now! ”
As always, Sakura lost to Ino— Ino, who has always been more beautiful, more talented, more notable than Sakura. She thought of red ribbons as the force in her mind finally pulled hard enough, and with a flash of black, Sakura found herself in the middle of an empty dirt field. Her back was on the ground, and the girl who had saved her from her bullies stood over Sakura— towering her in a familiar shadow.
The blonde had a confident smirk across her face. She watched Sakura frown with sharp, amused eyes. Despite having been in a taijutsu bout only a moment ago, not a single platinum strand was out of place. Even the scrapes littered across Ino’s body were pretty— she looked like a kunoichi (and it made Sakura burn).
“Your mindscape is just as boring as you— who would have thought?”
Sakura grasped a fistful of dirt as she sneered, “Fuck off, Ino.”
Ino ( oh so pretty Ino ) flipped her recently cut hair, superiority laced within her posture. “That I can’t do, Forehead.” She gave Sakura a tilted smile. “I have to make you forfeit first.”
A vile taste sat in Sakura’s mouth. Here she was, dry dirt coating her body with ugly, yellow bruises blooming on her skin. She felt weak, without any weapons or options, in this wide field. Sakura hated the way her muscles burned and how her depleted chakra fatigued her bones.
However, what stung the most was how everyone was so confident in Ino’s victory. The moment Sakura had been captured in the Yamanaka jutsu, she knew that everyone in the stands would never remember the civilian-born shinobi who lost to a clan heir. It was an outcome to be expected. Even Kakashi-sensei, who Sakura spotted before passing out, had simply tilted his head when she was caught by Ino— as if her failure was predetermined.
Sakura pushed herself up from the ground with trembling arms. She murmured, chest heaving, “Shut up.”
Ino looked unfazed, hands still on her hips, “Sure,” her eyes crinkled upwards, “after you forfeit.”
Sakura screamed with a burning throat, “I won’t— I can’t! ”
Her stomach churned as her veins ran cold. She grasped her head with dirty nails— further knotting her matted hair. Icey water drenched her heart as the piercing throb of her brain worsened. It felt as if the ground was rumbling beneath her knees. An earth shattering eruption occurred in her mind, and the dusty dirt of the field split in front of Sakura’s body.
“We won’t lose!”
Sakura could barely hear Ino’s yelp from her cloudy thoughts. A sea of emotions bursted into a whirlpool of obscurity. A mystifying, frightening presence crawled out of the crack in her mind— pushing herself up with an angry growl.
The figure was tall— much taller than the two girls. Her body was in the strange purgatory of a person and a drawing, with black, graphite scribbles lining her figure. Sakura’s lungs were squeezed by her ribcage, and despite her slowly fading eyesight, she felt a sense of familiarity with the presence.
“What the fuck is that!” Ino yelled.
The blonde grabbed a kunai from her holster and sent it towards the figure. However, it was not enough, for the kunai was absorbed into the presence’s body. The figure grabbed Ino’s body with a tight grip— one full of malice, jealousy, and most of all, anger .
Ino wheezed, eyes bloodshot, “Monster. ”
The word rang in Sakura’s mind. Her numb body slumped against the ground— dirt dusting her face. She had just faced a monster, one made of perversion and snakes. She was nothing like that bastard. The genin took deep breaths to still the fear racking her body. She could still feel the Sanin’s phantom gaze. It was like a hunter’s— apathetic and deadly.
Sakura looked at the blonde in rage. How dare she utter that word when she was nothing like that fucker? Did she really forget how much pain that snake brought upon her boys? It made her want to strangle Ino herself.
But Sakura never wanted her to die. Ino wheezed as the figure cracked her ribs. It was excruciatingly slow, each crack rang across the empty field. She tried to reach for her rival— whose small face had a blue tint. Sakura's throat was shut despite trying to yell out an apology. Ino was dying, and Sakura could only wish for a chance at forgiveness as her world went black.
Sakura was greeted by the bright reflection of the stands.
The genin could feel the tension in the air. All eyes were on her. A civilian had just broken out of the impenetrable Yamanaka technique. An impossible feat for many shinobi over the years, and yet an unknown genin did it in a matter of seconds.
Her eyes flickered around the stadium. There Kakashi was, his widened eye betraying his stoic facade. Sakura tasted satisfaction on her tongue despite the crawling of her skin. It was bittersweet— overcoming the impossible but being the last person expected to do so.
“Y-you—” Ino stammered across the arena, “You crazy bitch!”
Sakura took a step towards the blonde, “Ino?”
“Stay back!” Ino screeched, fumbling a kunai in her hand. She threw a multitude of weapons at Sakura, however, none of them reached her, too shaky to slice through the air. The blonde’s eyes were wide with fear, and her entire body trembled when her holster emptied. In a way, it was satisfying— seeing a clan heir so scared of a civilian. Yet, each blood curdling yell broke Sakura’s heart.
“I’ll kill you!” Ino sprinted towards Sakura with a jittering body, like prey whose only option was to fight.
Sakura could feel her heartbeat strum over her body. Each breath from her lungs felt heavy. Weight sat on her chest as her mind begged her for more oxygen. Time slowed as Ino and Sakura’s panic grew closer.
Not knowing what else to do, Sakura placed her weight on her right leg as she raised her arm in a fist— matching Ino’s stance.
Within a few seconds, Sakura could count the pores on Ino's face as her fist was nearing the blonde’s cheek. All Sakura could do at that moment was to counterattack.
She felt pressure on her face and her fist hitting something soft before the world went black for a third time.
❀
They had tied.
To Sakura’s shock, her fist had reached Ino at the same time the blonde had punched her. She wanted to celebrate taking down her rival, but she couldn’t revel in it. After all, she didn’t make it to the next round. It had been a day after her fight, and Sakura knew she had to train.
She had just practiced the Academy Three. She had always thought that there would be room for improvement, but there was none to be found. Her hand signs were quick, and her chakra control was perfect. As she lowered herself in the Academy kata stance for the nth time, she couldn’t help but notice how empty the Team 7 training grounds were. All that stood there was her— even the animals were silent.
Sasuke had left with Kakashi-sensei to learn an ‘awesome’ finishing move, according to Naruto— who had just gone under the wing of the legendary Toad Sage. As her thoughts lingered on Naruto, she realized that, as much as a bad student he was, there was someone who wanted to guide him.
As happy as Sakura was for him, she could not ignore the bitter taste in her mouth. She was supposed to be the good student. She was intelligent, quick on the up-take, and most of all, eager to learn. The chart in front of their class that had all of the students’ progress always noted her as a sponge. It was something she took pride in when she noted the other kids’ envy when they saw ‘Haruno’ next to the comment of ‘competent.’
But then she saw a flash of Wave— of her standing back, away from the violence, until all she could do was hold Sasuke’s limp body as she cried. Tears welled up at the thought. Of course she was alone. She was stupid, abrasive— annoying. Ever since she joined Team 7, all of the things she believed were enough to survive crumbled away by the harsh winds of reality.
Sakura, who’s taijutsu was always weak but never performed wrong, fell flat on her back after a high kick on the tree she used as a punching bag. All of the emotions building up in her chest clawed out of her throat in an animalistic screech. Her throat stung as she continuously attacked the tree. All she could see from her blurred vision was the inertia of her limbs as they moved away from graceful motions to erratic clawing— as if she was trying to reach for something that wasn’t there. She kept attacking until the pain of the truth became numb at the chipping of her nails and the scratches on her shins.
That was until she felt a presence behind her.
All of a sudden, Sakura’s vision sharpened. Her hands fell to her sides as she straightened her spin. She was hyper aware of the branches littered in her tousled hair and the blood dripping from her fingers dressed in scarlet. Her body felt sticky as she felt eyes pierce her back. Sakura opened her mouth to speak, but the words were stuck in her raw throat. She made up her mind to turn around until she heard the person speak.
“Training grounds aren’t meant for mindless bloodshed.”
The voice of an old man startled her. She expected a ninja. Civilians weren’t quiet with their footsteps, and only old men could be civilians— unless they were the Third Hokage. She felt a hand on her shoulder turn her face to him, but before she could meet his face, her eyes met the ground. Sakura saw long, black garbs and a wooden walking stick. His deep, orotund voice made her jump, but what made her truly frightened was when he asked her, “Where is your sensei?”
She was going to get in trouble. The old man will tell Kakashi-sensei, and he’ll see her unfit to be a ninja. He’ll think she’s lost her mind and ship her to T&I. Should she lie and say Kakashi-sensei knows of her habit, or should she come clean? She’ll definitely be sent to a Yamanaka if she tells the truth, but this old man was obviously a shinobi— he would sniff out her lie in an instant. His walking stick tapped her calf, and she met dark, piercing eyes.
“Well?”
The training grounds were still as Sakura determined the best response. When she made up her mind, she spoke with a slight shake, “My sensei isn’t here.”
The old man lifted a single brow, “And why is that?”
Sakura’s ribs squeezed her lungs. He left me for my teammate. I’m not worthy of his time. He thinks I’m weak.
“He’s helping my teammate train for the Chunin Exams, sir.”
The old man slightly tilted his head to the side, and if she wasn’t attuned to Kakashi’s small expressions, she would’ve missed it. His lips turned down slightly in contemplation, “I see…” The old man straightened his head but the small frown stayed. “Your teammate being Sasuke Uchiha, correct?”
Sakura blurted out a yes before she could scrutinize his question. She really wanted this conversation to end quickly— the dried blood started to itch until her thoughts finally caught up. How did he know I’m on Team 7? She was about to ask, but he broke the quiet atmosphere.
“Do you think shinobi die out of loyalty or for honor?”
“Um..?”
The old man gave her a less-than-impressed look at her eloquent answer. Sakura briefly blushed out of embarrassment before placing a hand on her chin in thought. Her blood smeared on her chin when she put her hand down, “Honor.”
The old man’s lips thinned in consideration at her response, and she took his silence as him urging her to continue. She took in a deep breath to steady her nerves. Sakura was still embarrassed from her previous incompetence. She hated people thinking she wasn’t smart. She steeled her eyes as she made eye contact, “Shinobi die for the honor of the village,” she paused, “but they live out of loyalty to their precious people— at least if they’re seasoned shinobi.”
Her words caused the old man’s face to go completely blank. He had a far-away look— as if he was somewhere else, but he gathered himself so quickly that she almost thought she saw something that wasn’t there.
“Seasoned shinobi?”
Sakura became sheepish— her answer was too vague. “Well, seasoned shinobi have faced death the most. However, they also create the strongest bonds.” Sadness flashed across her face as she remembered Kakashi’s confession in Wave.
Team 7 were in their room at Tazuna’s house. Sakura and the bickering boys gathered around an injured Kakashi after their tree-walking exercise. Their bandaged sensei ceased their argument by lowering his brightly colored book from his face. The air was still as Kakashi looked at each of his students. He broke the tension himself, “I already told you Zabuza will come back,”
Naruto nodded at his words. Kakashi-sensei had told them before today’s training . The jounin continued, “Will you be able to work as a team?”
Naruto bursted out with encouragement, “Of course, Kaka-sensei! Team 7 has been on it, believe it!”
“At the very last second,” Kakashi gave him a stern look. “It seems as if you’re only able to execute teamwork when you’re desperate.”
Naruto and Sasuke turned to each other simultaneously. Naruto scowled. Sasuke frowned. It amazed Sakura how alike they are despite their animosity. The boys both turned away from Kakashi to berate each other, but their sensei already put a hand up.
“Listen,” the boys stopped at Kakashi’s commanding tone. “You won’t live long without teamwork. Konoha shinobi are known for their 3-man cells. The Hokage will never assign a solo-mission to anyone under ANBU. As a chunin, your cells will constantly be shuffled. You’ll make bonds with many people, but for nearly everyone, their genin team will have the strongest bonds.”
Sakura almost missed his eye flash of melancholy.
“If you’d believe it, I was on a genin team once. My favorite memories are with my teammates.” The jounin sighed, “I just want you all to make bonds. Having precious people is important in your shinobi career, but in order to create friendships, you have to have teamwork.”
Sakura contemplated his advice. She really didn’t like Naruto. He always asked her on dates and was super annoying. She felt as if she were getting closer to Sasuke— until he shunned her after she finished the tree-walking exercise first. Sakura looked at the boys and was surprised to see them in deep thought. Her lips turned upwards, moments like this made her appreciate them.
Naruto spoke up first, “Sensei, where is your genin team? Can we meet them? We can go to Ichiraku’s!”
Sakura and Sasuke saw Kakashi visibly tense. His voice was far away, “They’re not here.”
Naruto was silent for a moment until he perked with energy, “That’s fine, Kaka-sensei! We’ll go together as Team 7!” The somber mood lifted, but Sakura could see how much of his heart he lost.
Sakura shook her head out of the memory, and looked back up at the old man. “Having a bond means sharing love, hopes, and trust. When those bonds break because of death, all of the dreams once shared are now all on you. If you die, those dreams will be lost.”
“Would you rather die for honor or live out of loyalty?”
“Live.”
“Is there anyone you share that with, Sakura?”
“...no.”
The old man takes a step toward her and presses something in her clean hand, “Meet me here at 0400 hours tomorrow.” Sakura looked up at the old man. She knitted her eyebrows and tilted her head— confusion clear across her face. The man took a step back, and disappeared in a swirl of leaves. The wind carried his words.
“I will train you.”