Concerned
Kakashi stood by the window, watching the raindrops that relentlessly pelted against the glass. A quiet sigh escaped him as he delved deeper into his thoughts. Time had long since lost its meaning for him. For the past few days, worry about his father, who had been fighting at the front for three months, had been gnawing at him. Although Kakashi knew there was no real cause for concern—after all, Sakumo was an experienced and capable shinobi who could hold his own at the front—the worry still clung to him.
Before Kakashi could lose himself further in his thoughts, a pile of laundry landed with a dull thud beside him. Startled, he flinched and turned his head. Standing next to him was Kushina, her hands on her hips, with a determined expression on her face. Kakashi turned his gaze back to the window and murmured, "What's wrong?"
"What's wrong?!" Kushina repeated sharply. "You've been standing at the window for almost two hours, staring out as if the world is ending. Stop being so down and get out of those training clothes. Minato will be home soon, and we want to have dinner. I don't want you sitting at the table all dirty. Besides, you need to help me fold the laundry—it's a mess," she scolded.
With an exasperated sigh, Kakashi turned and made his way to the bathroom. But before he could take another step, Kushina stopped him. "Hey, are you just going to disappear?" she asked insistently.
Kakashi turned to her and shrugged. "What else should I do? You said I should freshen up for dinner."
Kushina raised an eyebrow and studied Kakashi for a moment. Then she walked up to him and crouched down in front of him. "Do you want to tell me what's bothering you?"
"It's not important, it's actually quite childish," Kakashi explained, turning his gaze away to escape Kushina's curious look.
Kushina's face took on a thoughtful expression. "Stop lying! What's really going on?"
Kakashi sighed quietly and turned further away. "I'm worried about my father. He's been at the front for so long. Before you say anything, I know it might be unnecessary and he can defend himself well. But I have no idea how things are going for him, and I can't protect him." His voice sounded frustrated and filled with inner struggle.
Kushina was silent for a moment, then gently placed a hand on Kakashi's shoulder. "It's not your job to take care of him or anyone else alone. Remember, you're only six years old, and no one expects you to carry that burden alone. Minato has told you many times: accept our help."
Kakashi turned slightly towards Kushina and smiled at her. "Don’t forget, I'm actually 36. You’re all younger than I am, and I see it as my duty to protect you." His smile faded, and his expression grew serious as he lowered his gaze. "When I was really six, you took care of me and protected me, even though I was a little brat. I’m infinitely grateful for that. Still, I’ve made so many mistakes. This time, I want to be the one protecting you and giving back what you’ve given me." His hands clenched into fists to hide the trembling that ran through his body.
Kushina groaned in frustration and tilted her head back. "How can you be so stubborn?!" Then she withdrew her hand from Kakashi’s shoulder and stood up. "At some point, this behavior will hit a wall, and the consequences will be severe. But Minato will have to deal with that." With one last exasperated look, she continued, "Go take a bath now. We want to eat soon.”
Without saying a word, Kakashi made his way to the bathroom. He removed his dirty clothes and neatly set them aside. Then he filled the bathtub with water and watched as it slowly filled up. As the water rose, he sank deeper into his thoughts. Kushina’s words echoed in his mind, and the worry about his father wouldn’t let go.
Kakashi knew his concerns about his father were unfounded, but they held him captive. In recent nights, he had been plagued by nightmares of his father's death, seeing his lifeless body. It was as if his mind was slowly reverting to that of a six-year-old. But the fear couldn’t be shaken—the fear of losing his father again.
When the bathtub was finally full, Kakashi turned off the water and first took a shower. After thoroughly washing himself, he stepped into the bathtub. The warm water enveloped him immediately, and with a deep sigh, he sank further into the soothing warmth. For a moment, he closed his eyes and enjoyed the calming sensation surrounding his body.
After a few minutes, Kakashi opened his eyes and stared at the ceiling. Kushina’s words re-entered his consciousness. He knew how important teamwork was and recognized that Kushina was right—he should accept their help. But he just couldn’t overcome his own stubbornness. The urge to handle everything alone and not endanger anyone was too strong. Although he was aware that his behavior wasn’t right, he was determined not to put anyone in unnecessary danger. This time, Kakashi wanted to be the one protecting everyone.
Now Kakashi needed to find a way to find out how his father was faring at the front. He needed to be sure that his father was safe and did not need help. Kakashi knew he wouldn’t be at ease until he saw with his own eyes that his father was okay. But that was easier said than done. He couldn’t just go to the front—after all, he was a Genin and only six years old. Asking the Hokage to send him to the front was out of the question.
Frustrated, Kakashi finished his bath, got out of the tub, and dried himself thoroughly. He put on fresh clothes and donned his mask. Then he tidied up the bathroom, leaving it clean and orderly before heading back to the living room.
Before Minato came home, Kakashi helped Kushina around the house: he folded the laundry and set the table. When Minato finally arrived, they sat down for dinner together. The atmosphere was quiet; Kakashi was too absorbed in his thoughts to engage in any conversation. Minato and Kushina seemed to notice and left him alone, which Kakashi was grateful for.
After dinner, Kakashi immediately retreated to the guest room for some peace. He had no interest in socializing with them. Kakashi was not naïve—he knew Kushina would likely tell Minato about what had happened. It was certain that Minato would speak to him that evening, but as long as he could avoid the conversation, he was glad.
Kakashi grabbed a book and curled up in bed. Although it wasn’t his beloved Icha Icha, the story provided a welcome distraction and helped him relax a bit. For a moment, he could forget his worries, but thoughts of his father and how he could reach the front soon occupied his mind again.
After a while, Kakashi closed the book and fell exhausted onto the bed. His thoughts wouldn’t quiet down, and he desperately pondered how he could get to the front. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, hoping for a solution to come to him.
After a moment of silence, he suddenly sat up as an idea came to him. But he immediately realized that it wouldn’t be easy to put it into action. He needed to think through his plan carefully and consider the best way to proceed. He still had some time to prepare, and he would use it to work out every detail.
It wasn’t long before there was a knock on his door, and his Sensei entered the room with a gentle smile. “Everything okay with you? You’ve been so quiet tonight,” Minato asked with a concerned tone in his voice.
Kakashi gave a slight smile under his mask and rolled his eyes. “Don’t try to fool me. Kushina talked to you, didn’t she?” he said calmly as he sat on the edge of the bed.
Minato gave a faint smile, scratched the back of his head, and sat down next to Kakashi. “Of course, she talked to me,” he admitted, looking down at the floor. “She told me that you miss your father and are still reluctant to accept our help.”
Kakashi waved dismissively. “It’s nothing, really. Tell her not to worry. I’m managing.”
Minato sighed in frustration and gave Kakashi a piercing look. “Why am I not surprised by this answer?” he muttered, before his gaze fell back to the floor. “I’ve come to understand that it’s not easy to change your mind and that pressure doesn’t help. Still, I want you to know: I’m here for you anytime, and you can talk to me about anything.”
A warm feeling spread in Kakashi’s chest, and he said softly, “Thank you.” They were silent for a moment, as the words lingered in the room. Finally, Kakashi took a deep breath and looked Minato in the eyes. “There is actually something I’d like your help with,” he said, his voice firm but a bit hesitant.
Minato looked at Kakashi in surprise and took a moment to respond. “Of course, my offer still stands. How can I help you?”
Cautiously, Kakashi slid off the bed, stood in front of Minato, and looked him straight in the eyes. He tried to put on a pleading expression, hoping Minato wouldn’t be able to refuse. “I need to go to the front to make sure my father is okay. The Hokage won’t send me there easily, since I’m just a six-year-old Genin. But if you could persuade him to take me along, it might work.”
An uncomfortable silence settled in the room as Minato stared at Kakashi in disbelief. Then he shook his head resolutely. “No! I will not take you to the front. It’s far too dangerous, and besides, I don’t have any assignments planned in the near future.” His voice was firm and resolute, leaving no room for discussion.
Frustrated, Kakashi turned away and crossed his arms. “That would be the least of the problems. You could simply ask the Hokage for a front-line assignment and suggest that I come along. What’s the harm in that?”
“You’re only six and still a Genin! It’s just not a place for you,” Minato countered firmly. “Besides, your father would tear me apart if I took you to the front.”
Kakashi groaned in annoyance and sank down next to Minato on the bed. “Don’t forget that I’m not really six. I’ve been on many battlefields and seen more death and suffering than you. You can’t keep me from this forever. It won’t be long before I’m no longer a Genin.”
Minato flinched and stared at Kakashi with wide eyes. “What do you mean, you won’t be a Genin for much longer?”
Kakashi leaned back and stared at the ceiling. “The Chunin Exams are coming up soon. We’ll participate, and I’ll be promoted to Chunin. Back then, we were sent to the front for some missions to quickly gain experience. At that time, I was only six years old.”
“They made you a Chunin at six and sent you to war?” Minato asked incredulously, looking at Kakashi. “What happened to Rin and Obito?”
Kakashi kept his gaze fixed on the ceiling and closed his eyes. “They didn’t pass the exam, even though they participated in some missions. But they were never at the front with us,” he explained calmly. He paused, slowly opened his eyes, and continued, “No one would have questioned promoting me to Chunin and sending me to the front at such a young age back then. My father was dead, and I was seen as the son of scum. No one cared about me.” The thought left a painful edge in his voice.
A somber silence hung between them, and Kakashi could clearly feel Minato’s internal struggle. “You only told me that your father fell from grace,” Minato said finally, “but not what happened to you.”
Kakashi was silent for a moment before looking at Minato. “I don’t want to say too much, but the villagers made it clear what they thought of me. They transferred my father’s supposed faults onto me. It wasn’t an easy time for me. My father suffered from depression, which I couldn’t understand as a child, and the village didn’t make my life any easier.”
Minato’s eyes were shadowed with compassion. “Oh, Kakashi... I’m so sorry...”
Kakashi quickly shook his head, sat up, and interrupted Minato. “You don’t need to apologize. It’s been a long time, and I’m fine. Besides, there was always someone who never stopped caring for me.” He smiled at Minato.
Minato raised a confused eyebrow. “And who was that?”
Kakashi chuckled and nudged Minato playfully with his shoulder. “Well, who do you think?” he teased. “You never abandoned me, no matter how difficult I was or how often I brushed you off. You were always there for me and took care of me. Even though I realized it late, I’m incredibly grateful to you. It hurts even more that I couldn’t show you and Kushina that better.” His voice trembled at the end, and he bit his lower lip to control his emotions.
Before Kakashi could think further, Minato pulled him into a warm embrace and held him tight. “I’m sorry you had to go through all that,” he whispered. “But you don’t need to feel guilty about anything. I’m so glad that Naruto and you survived. It means more to me than my own life, and I’m sure Kushina feels the same.” Minato hugged Kakashi even tighter, his voice gently resonating through the room.
Kakashi leaned into the embrace but didn’t actively return it. “I’m sure Kushina thinks the same,” he said quietly. He hesitated for a moment before continuing, “She wanted to adopt me; she wanted me to become a part of your family.”
Minato smiled softly and gently stroked Kakashi’s hair. “You probably never accepted that, did you?”
Kakashi shook his head in response but didn’t elaborate. For a moment, he enjoyed the soothing warmth emanating from Minato before pulling away from the embrace and looking him firmly in the eyes. “Would you please help me get to the front?”
Minato ruffled Kakashi’s hair and stood up. “I’m sorry, but I stand by my decision. Even though you’ve seen many battlefields, I won’t take you with me. Trust that your father is well taken care of.” He turned to leave the room. “You should get to bed soon. Tomorrow we have training with Orochimaru.”
Irritated, Kakashi rolled his eyes. “Yeah, yeah.”
Before Minato left the room, he turned back to Kakashi and smiled gently. “Thank you for telling me that. I really appreciate it. Please don’t be angry with me; I’m just worried about you and don’t want you to be in danger.” He added quietly, “Sleep well, Kashi. See you tomorrow.”
Kakashi smiled back, though he was frustrated that Minato wasn’t willing to help. He had already expected that convincing him wouldn’t be easy. “It’s okay. Sleep well, Minato-sensei!”
Minato left the room, leaving Kakashi alone. Frustrated, Kakashi collapsed onto the bed and began to think again about how he might get to the front. But slowly, he had to admit that he might have to wait until his father came home. For now, he needed to focus on training with Orochimaru. The Sannin would challenge him again tomorrow, and Kakashi was actually looking forward to it. It helped him distract himself and provided a chance to truly push his limits.
**********
Another blow struck Kakashi, throwing him hard to the ground. Before he could get back up, a kunai flashed in front of his face. “You’ve lost,” Orochimaru said in a cold tone, putting the kunai away.
Struggling, Kakashi got back on his feet and brushed the dirt off his clothes. His gaze fell on Orochimaru, who was turning away from him. “Let’s have one more fight,” he requested, determined.
Orochimaru turned back to Kakashi and examined him critically. “We’re done for today. There’s no point in continuing. You’ve lost all our matches and are unfocused. Further training would be futile. Go home.”
Kakashi shook his head. “Please, Orochimaru-sensei, just one more fight.”
Orochimaru sighed in annoyance and rubbed his face. “Stop being a nuisance, kid. When I say ‘no,’ I mean it. You’re too unfocused to keep fighting. There’s no point in training any longer.” He turned away again, his patience exhausted.
Kakashi’s shoulders slumped, and he let out a deep breath. Orochimaru was right—he couldn’t concentrate on the training. “I’m sorry, Sensei.”
Orochimaru paused and glanced over his shoulder. “Next time, I expect you to be more focused. By the way, I’ll be heading to the front soon; reinforcements have been requested.”
Kakashi flinched slightly and stepped forward. “So you’re going to the front?” he asked, as a sudden idea occurred to him. “Can you take me with you?”
Orochimaru turned fully to Kakashi and looked at him in surprise. “You want to go to the front?” he repeated in astonishment. “Why?”
Kakashi hesitated for a moment before deciding to tell Orochimaru the truth. He hoped it might strengthen their relationship. “My father is at the front, and I want to find him there.”
Orochimaru stared at him expressionlessly for a moment before laughing. “You want me to take you with me and confront your father? What does your blond sensei think of that?” he asked with a sharp, interested tone.
Kakashi crossed his arms behind his head and smiled challengingly. “Minato-sensei didn’t want to take me. But you’re not afraid of my father. Wouldn’t this be a good opportunity for me to make quick progress?”
Orochimaru shook his head and crossed his arms. “You really are a brat,” he murmured with a grin. “Alright, I’ll take you. A bit more experience won’t hurt you. Minato is just too soft. But remember, you’ll have to deal with your father.” He started to move and added, “In two days at six o’clock at the village entrance. If you’re not on time, I’ll leave without you.” With that, he disappeared.
Kakashi smiled in satisfaction. Even though the training hadn’t gone as planned, he finally had a chance to get to the front. Minato would surely be unhappy, but Kakashi didn’t care. Reinforcements had been requested, so there had to be a problem. Kakashi needed to make sure everything was alright; he had to protect his important people at any cost.