Fools

Gaara couldn’t shake the feeling in his gut as he watched the remaining battles. It was like his mind was restless, his heart was heavy and he felt a surge of anxiety he’d never felt before. He wasn’t sure what was going on, but he made certain not to show it. His face was emotionless to the world, but inside Gaara was panicking.

Had Lee done this? Was hurting your soulmate bad?

Morally gaara thought yes, of course it was horrible to hurt your soulmate. It was horrible to hurt anyone actually.

But no, Gaara meant was the universe punishing him for hurting his soulmate. For trying to crush this so called blessing.

All these feelings, the red head had not felt up to this moment. It was so foreign he thought, even if someone could understand, would he even be able to describe it? Could he put into words what was going on in his ill ridden mind?

No, he thought, he was silly to think he could confide in someone with any of this.

Walking away from where the preliminaries were held, Gaara still held onto that dread he felt . The cracks in the floor just reminded him of everything he had done. Nobody said anything when he stopped walking and just stared at the ground.

His eyes followed the lines and holes that riddled the ground.

Baki was the only one to stop, he waited for Gaara to snap out of whatever hole he had fallen down in his head. He looked like he had wanted to say something, but refrained.

Baki cleared his throat when the boy finally caught up.

“How are you feeling?” He asked in a hush tone, keeping their conversation just between them.

Gaara fought between speaking or just ignoring the man. If he spoke, he felt the elder just wouldn’t understand.

“Why are you asking me such a question?” Gaara practically snarled. Whether he meant to act like a brat or not, it just always seemed to end up this way. He couldn’t help his annoyance. Or that was his excuse anyways.

“Apologies,” Baki muttered, backing off quickly. It seemed he decided not to pry any further for the time being.

He eventually went to catch up to Temari and Kankuro, leaving Gaara to think about his actions further.

Or really to think about Lee.

That bowlcut was simmering in the back of his mind. His essence slowly boiled over to the point it pained Gaara to even think about him.

Lee was about the total opposite of Gaara. Looks and personality wise, his fighting style was also very different. While Gaara stood still, Lee was bolting around faster than the human eye could see. His speed was incredible, even Gaara couldn’t deny it. He had been one of the first people to ever touch Gaara, and that stuck with the him.

Gaara had also seen how Lee was around his friend, he was kind and (extremely) loud. While Lee had all these people to support and help him, Gaara had no one. He wasn’t kind, and he definitely wasn’t loud. He didn’t love anyone, and he certainly didn’t need anyone to support him.

He clenched his fist.

When Lees mentor had stepped in between Lee and him, the boy had realized just how different they were. And that was why Gaara felt they couldn’t be together.

They were just too different.

Lee didn’t need to shoulder any of Gaaras burdens as Baki had told him, Lee didn’t need to have to deal with a monster.

Gaara felt that would only dull the boys shine severely. Not that he cared much for that.

This was all purely observation.

The red head sighed, crossing his arms as he walked. He was tired of all this soulmate talk, if he could pretend they didn’t exist then he could forget about Lee and this stupid string.

He could just live the rest of his life alone in peace (kind of).

Coming back into reality, Gaara noticed everyone around him. There were lots of people just going about their days around him, he watched workers rush around and children run passed him laughing loudly. Funnily enough, it seemed that everyone in Konoha was buzzing, full of life and happiness. Gaara wondered if one day even he could feel the same.

Shukaku laughed to himself in the back of his mind, curse that damned spirit.

Gaara kicked a rock at his feet, watching it roll not too far off from where he was. He followed behind it, deciding to use it as a distraction from the depths of his despair. When he went to kick it again, a foot stopped him, and to his annoyance it was a familiar blond haired boy.

He slowly looked up and met Naruto’s sky blue eyes. The boy stood up straight with his chest puffed out, he looked like a total idiot.

Gaara would laugh if it was a normal thing for him to do, but it wasn’t so he just stared blankly at the blond.

“You don’t look too happy to see me,” Naruto commented, expecting even the smallest reaction from Gaara. When he didn’t get one he huffed, and decided to finally get to the point. “Well I’m not happy to see your either ok no brows!” He exclaimed, giving Gaara an unnecessary nickname.

Gaara felt his eye twitch.

“I can’t stand by and watch you hurt yourself and Lee,” Naruto continued, his words making Gaaras whole world stop. It was strange, it felt like Gaara could hear his own breathing, what was happening?

“I know it’s not my business, but I can’t let you go without at least talking to bushybrow, he’s a nice guy I swear,” Naruro went on and on, but Gaara was still caught up on his last statement. “You know the hospital isn’t too far from here, and Ichiraku!” Naruto silently celebrated.

“Hey are you listening?”

Gaara furrowed his nonexistent brows, “Quit talking nonsense,” he uttered. What did he know about Gaara and Lee? No. what did he know about Gaara? He had no right to say anything to or about him.

“It’s not nonsense! I see the way that bushybrow is, he’s so meh,” Naruto tried to explain, making a weird face at the end. Gaara refrained from rolling his eyes.

When Gaara didn’t say anything Naruto pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Ugh! The point is, you need to do something. I know you want to!”

“You don’t know what I want to do,” Gaara replied ominously, Naruto groaned. The blond realizing he was getting nowhere.

“Look no brows, I can tell you don’t enjoy the idea of soulmates..I uh talked to your brother during your match, and I know it’s not polite to talk about someone but he seemed like he really cares about you. I can’t ignore someone who clearly needs help, you don’t have to think about it all now, but at least try and think about it for later,” He said, giving Gaara a nervous smile. “Sorry I’m not good with my words, but know that you have a friend here, I’m not too hard to find!”

The blond left after that, begging Gaara to think about what he said.

Out of spite Gaara wanted to say he had already forgotten everything, but in all honesty he remembered ever single word that came out of Naruto’s mouth. His words were like a splash of ice cold water, and Gaara hated getting wet.

Gaaras walk back wasn’t as peaceful anymore, and he was back in his head in no time. It seemed that his mind wasn’t letting him forget the noisy blond and his stupid excuse for a speech.

How could he just loudly and stupidly proclaim himself as Gaaras friend? No one was Gaaras friend, he was alone and it was always going to be that way. Whoever this Naruto boy was, he was a fool.

..

Gaara didn’t acknowledge the woman at the front desk as he stormed in, he just kept on towards his room. He wanted to avoid as much interaction as possible, he was already annoyed because of Naruto, plus that damned Shukaku for taunting him.

Right as Gaara stepped through the door, he was met with the sight of his siblings and Baki sitting in the living room. They were talking, but stopped when they saw Gaara.

Something about their silence fueled Gaaras anger more, and the boy slammed the front door and stomped to his room.

He made it clear how upset he was with the slam of his room door as well.

He was so upset, he felt he could just rampage here and now. Yet he couldn’t.

Gaara felt he’d lived with this feeling for a while now, so why out of all times was it starting to bother him? It seemed he had an itch for human connection he’d never had before.

He wondered if he could achieve that desire, but then he thought about the people he already had around him.

The stares of his brother and sister haunted him, they always looked like gaara was going to make it his goal to harm them, when in reality, he didn’t desire to.

Gaara had realized that was how everyone truly saw him, as just a threat, someone to watch out for and shun. He was a monster that everyone was afraid of, but he didn’t want to be.

Shukaku may be a monster, but Gaara was just a boy.

He didn’t know how to make people see that he wasn’t the beast he carried inside him. He wasn’t a threat or a killing machine, he had ambitions and he wanted to be accepted.

Gaara decided his first step was to talk to Naruto, and maybe even Lee..