Chapter 2
Haruno Sakura was by no means "talented".
At least, that's what she thought. Though she had worked her way up through hours and hours of training until she could proudly call herself one of the strongest women (and sometimes people, when she was feeling particularly confident) to ever live, there was something fundamentally different about the 'gifted' people she often found herself surrounded with.
They were on this entirely different level that granted them the ability to succeed in anything, as long as they tried enough. It was a level she could've never reached, no matter how many more hours of Tsunade's bone-crushing training she endured and how many more volumes of books she read until she knew the words by heart, because Naruto and Sasuke were continuously achieving things she couldn’t even begin to dream of in a span of months.
They – Sasuke for sure – could've probably learned the arts of healing, if only they had enough time.
She wasn't special for being somewhat good at healing.
She wasn't 'the only one in her team that could heal', the others just didn't do it.
That was what set her apart from them. She had a limit. The maximum she could ever reach. Her possibilities weren't endless. Rather, they were countable. And once she used up all the potential she had, the others would continue to jump leaps and discover new abilities they secretely harbored. And then she would be looking at their backs again, sprinting past her with a speed she had long exhausted.
Sakura knew she shouldn't feel that way. Shouldn't feel jealous of someone else's success when they were in the middle of a war.
She knew.
But in the quiet moments she was given from time to time, in which she was left alone in the tiny tent she called hers before rushing back to either the frontline or the medic tent, she couldn’t help but be reminded of the everlasting fact that there was nothing that made her unique.
Nothing made her special in the face of the prodigies her team consisted of. No technique that only she could do. Nothing that people would specifically require her, Haruno Sakura, for, because it was only a matter of time before they were miles better than her in everything she built up for herself.
That's right, in this endless war between the (remaining) Allied Shinobi Forces and Kaguya's army, it was only a matter of time before she was the useless one again and the others could do what she could do but so much better.
She had learned to come to terms with that fact long ago.
That she could never be like them. Don't get her wrong, her self-esteem was nowhere near low, she knew she was strong. Maybe never as strong at the boys but still strong enough and that was what mattered. As long as they all survived, it didn't matter if she couldn't even begin to compare herself to them. Sasuke and Naruto acknowledged her powers. They knew she was someone they could rely on.
The problem was the others.
When it got to 7 years of war, nobody really remembered that there had been a time when everyone hated Naruto and considered Sasuke a traitor.
Now, they were the heroes of the Shinobi Forces. The pillars. The strongest. They were what kept the shinobi's morale high and the sole reason they could hold on this long.
But Sakura? Sakura was the same as before the war and everyone knew. She was still the weakest. She was still a burden. Always a bother, lke that time Ino threw herself in front of Kaguya's rod to save Sakura who hadn't been able to pay attention because of the dangerous levels of chakra she was losing to her summons, healing the people on the battlefield.
Or that other time when Kakashi told her to escape while he bought time, effectively leaving him to die fighting the Rabbit Goddess. She and Kakashi got called a lot of names for that one.
"How could he force us to abandon the camp with all the resources that we gathered?"
"We just started somewhat settling down, but now we gave to start from scratch again!"
"Couldn't he have just... you know, lured her away? Guess the Copy-nin's wits only amounted to so much if his first thought was to abandon everything we've build up."
"And the Fifth's apprentice, too. How could she just leave him to die? Wasn't he her teacher?"
Looking back at it, that was probably the moment she'd lost faith in humanity. The moment they started dragging the name of a comrade that sacrificed themselves for their survival though the dirt. As if she had had much of a choice when Kakashi was going to do it either way to save the whole camp from being wiped out. It was only logical for her to escape along with the rest, because what damage could she do to Kaguya? Saving one more person was better than fighting a fight she would only hinder Kakashi in.
And it wasn't like she wanted to leave him behind.
The people weren't always like that.
War made them bitter and anxious, having gone through countless losses and never knowing when the next wave of attacks would come – how much more time they had, before they too would be captured and consumed to become another member of Kaguya's growing army of mindless minions.
Another factor was probably that only people of prestigious clans survived up to that point. Only those who had training drilled into them as soon as they could walk, would've continued to get up after each battle. Unfortunately, being born into a warrior family meant being born with a golden spoon in the mouth.
A civilian-born like her wasn't exactly commom or welcomed into the community of noble clans.
The point was that Sakura was the odd one in Team 7, now consisting of only 3 members.
Not that anyone said it to her, but she could recognize the looks in their eyes when she came back to tell them how many died that day (duties of a healer), while Sasuke and Naruto (mainly the latter though) boasted about their achievements in that particular fight.
"Naruto and Sasuke are guilty of their deaths, too." She sometimes wanted to say. But that wouldn't make her any different from them.
And she didn't want them to hate Naruto and Sasuke too. They didn't deserve that.
Was it after Tsunade's death?
People began to see her as less. For being weaker than her teammates. For being a 'bad healer' that 'couldn't even keep 10 people alive'.
But Sasuke and Naruto were right there fighting the Zetsu. They were supposed to have her back and ensure she could heal the injured. She couldn’t do that when the ones at the front seemingly weren't able to keep the enemies off and kept forcing her to fight. The war was hopeless anyway. Although Naruto seemed to have everyone convinced there was a future in which they could win, Sakura had given up hope quite some time ago.
Because she, the healer, knew the best.They were losing entire troops every day, and out of all the remaining, only a fraction was still willing and able to fight. Someone going to the battlefield had a 80% chance of not coming back, and fighting at the frontline was no different from suicide.
Might as well just throw yourself infront of the first Zetsu and become fuel for Kaguya's power, like some decided to do nowadays.
And yet they were saying they could win?
Come on.
Sakura was sick of it.
Sick of fighting herself to the brink of death for a future that wouldn’t – couldn't – come. Sick of shouldering all the blame. Sick of being the weakest. Sick of being replaceable.
And when she decided that, it was as if the world had waited for that moment. Even though she was jealous and sometimes even spiteful of Naruto and Sasuke, that didn't mean she didn't love them with all that remained of her heart.
She couldn’t blame them for the things others thought of her.
The both of them had lived a life unimaginably painful life. Hating them for something out of their control was the last thing she wanted to do to them. They were the only ones who had always been with her. Even if they parted ways in search of power, in the end, they would always come back together as Team 7.
Perhaps that's why she didn't feel too bad about dying. At least the last thing she'd do would be for them. Not for the Shinobi Alliance, of her village, or an unrealistic happily ever after.
To ensure they can live just a day longer, even if that day is filled with death and suffering. As long as they were alive.
And as Kaguya's arm pierced her chest, blood gushing out of the wound, along with the taste of iron blooming in her mouth, she heard a pained scream from not her but Naruto, whom she pushed aside a moment ago.
A raven-haired head in the distance, whipping to the side. Mismatched eyes widening and mouth moving in words she couldn’t understand, maybe because she was rapidly bleeding out.
The man appeared beside her in a flash and caught her falling body a fraction of a second before she hit the ground. She didn't really care.
Someone gently laid her onto the ground before they dissappeared out of her vision along with Sasuke. She didn’t know how long she lay there, trying to stop her body from automatically healing her, like years of training accustomed her to.
It was useless.
(Just like her)
Her lungs were punctured, a giant hole straight through the vital organs (she knew that she could've twisted at the last moment to avoid just that, knew she could've survived if she wanted to), and she was losing more blood than she could hope to recover.
She didn't regret what she had done. It was more beneficial for her to die rather than to lose Naruto.
She wanted this.
Sometime later, Naruto appeared before her again with a face all scrunched up and dirty from ash, blood, and tears running down his cheeks.
He held her tightly, though she was starting to lose the sensation in her body. Sasuke was kneeling on the ground, hair covering his eyes. Sakura didn't know what kind of expression he was wearing. She hoped he was at least feeling somewhat sad.
More people started surrounding them, but she paid no mind to them. They'd gotten what they wanted. At last, it was Sakura's turn to sacrifice herself for the sake of a bright future that wouldn’t happen. She would be forgotten in a few weeks time, and the camp would've appointed one of the better healers to the now vacant chief position, and Sasuke and Naruto would have to be a bit more alert, now that she couldn’t block the occasional sneaking up Zetsu.
Sakura didn't notice when her mind started drifting off, the annoying thoughts of– what now? quieting down like candles burning out one after the another. Her head was blank – similar to when she was mindlessly healing patients –, but when she had realized it, she was already too far gone to look Naruto in the eyes one last time or say some final words.
There was a strange feeling of calmness inside her mind in her last moment. Like being wrapped up in a cold, yet hot blanket.
She embraced it.