EPILOGUE
he felt like throwing up.
his insides twist and turn as the realization of what he has to do slowly settled in his mind.
swallowing the disgusting, acidic mixture of his stomach that was building its way up, he fought to keep the contents of his stomach down.
his surprisingly steady hands clenched into tight fists at his sides as he silently stared into the crib, inside laid an innocent, clueless infant, it’s large, glossy eyes curiously staring up at the odd, unfamiliar masked hound that had appeared before it.
he was caught in a spiraling argument with himself. had humanity truly fallen this low? He couldn't deny it, this was part of this disgraceful job. But to see what someone would do to their own child for the sake of... ugh.
he had no real way of proving this thought and theory(if you could even call it that, the truth was quite obvious)false, which just made him feel like vomiting his guts out even more.
–
it was the young adults last mission as an ANBU member, which, he supposed he should've been… happy about, excited even. he never enjoyed this job, not in the slightest, but he wasn't quite sure what to make of it yet.
he had oh so naively thought the hokage was gonna go easy on him, give him something ‘quick’ and ‘easy’ as a rather..goodbye ‘gift’, of course, that would never be the case, not for kakashi, because god forbid one thing goes in his favor.
he accepted the mission under the impression that it wouldn't be anything too…challenging(well, as ‘easy’ as an ANBU mission could possibly ever get.) -not like he could reject it anyways- he were soon to figure out just how wrong his admittedly ‘optimistic’ assumption was.
the mission had seemed straightforward at first. when kakashi unrolled the scroll, the orders were clear: retrieve a "special" scroll. he had no idea what the scroll contained -or whether it even truly belonged to the hidden leaf in the first place for him to ‘retrieve’ it- but questions weren't part of the job. as ANBU, you learned not to question orders. after all, you were nothing but a pawn in a never-ending game of chess, devoid of any personal thoughts, simply trained to do as you are told..
though kakashi never really liked being ANBU, he wasn't thrilled about leaving either. the third hokage had mentioned something about making him a jōnin sensei– a prospect that felt more like a punishment than a new opportunity…talk about a nightmare.
kakashi, admittedly, had zoned out the rest of that conversation upon realizing he couldn't slither his way out of this one. the reason of his displeasure was easy to assume: it was all he has known. for such a long time, all he has known was to be an ANBU member(eventually an ANBU captain i suppose), it was all he was good for, nothing but a killing machine. a ruthless weapon, kakashi the friend killer. he wasn't a babysitter, he wasn't gentle or kind or..compassionate and understanding like a sensei needs to be. he would be completely out of his element! but of course, hokage's orders were to be obeyed.
before he knew it, the bittersweet day of doom had came, the day he looked forward too…kakashi wasn't sure how to feel about this day.
his morning went relatively normal as it was routine, he had woken up early morning, beat the sun in rising first, and freshened up.
he wasn't too fond of eating breakfast lately…or of any meal in general. he wasn't sure why, but he had a hard time keeping food down…was this his body's way of killing itself and putting itself out of it's misery? kami knows. he hopes he wasn't getting sick.
he didn't bother pondering over the subject too much and decided to just eat as much as he could, before he was set and left the village.
the people who apparently had the scroll , according to his mission scroll, were a small clan in the middle of some forest. nothing he couldn't manage, judging by the information provided, he had already spactated that the clan wasn't going to be a challenge, they didn't have any abilities that stood out to him, nothing for him to fear or look out for, they seemed…relatively normal, it was quite odd for such a non-threatening, basic clan to be harboring and somehow stealing such an important scroll. oh well..who was he to question it anyways?
before he knew it, he had already arrived, perched on top of a tree branch, hiding behind the green leaves as he gazed down upon his target.
the small village in which the clan members were located in was as expected…very much so regular, nothing about it really stood out, normal people living their normal day to day lives.
the livestock were already lively and awake, lazily eating the food their owners had provided for them, a few early risers already up and awake, doing their chores one by one, a relatively peaceful morning.
you can just imagine how quick and effortless killing them was, the hatake boy felt strange, guilty– i mean, these people couldn't even hold a kunai right for the life of them, it felt unfair to harm them, let alone kill them…but orders were orders. they had stolen a precious secret from the hidden leaf, and now they were facing the consequences of their actions. or so he tried telling himself.
kakashi was starting to feel…suspicious, why would such an easy mission be assigned to a high ranked shinobi such as himself?? this barely took him half an hour.
though, something didn't feel… *right* about this– nothing about this felt right.
the alarm bells in his overworked brain were going off and blaring annoyingly loud, before he decided to ignore them once again and simply ran a gloved hand through his wild strands of silver, he seriously needed to put a stop to his spiraling thoughts. he thought too much. all he had to do was to follow the orders that were given to him and then it would be all over, he's just making it harder for himself…
he decided to proceed with more caution, surely this was some sort of trickery to get kakashi to let down his guard and relax his posture. whatever it was, he didn't like it one bit.
—
the silver haired hound brought his boot covered leg down on the bloody and heaving chest of the dying man, his once bright eyes slowly draining of life as more and more blood oozed out of the open gaping wound on his side.
before he could even mutter a word, a katana's sharp edge was pointed in his face, demanding for the scroll, the disoriented man racked in his brain, trying to figure out what the boy was saying, groaning out in pain when pressure was added to his injured chest.
“where is it?”
the icy cold and oddly calm voice of the young one repeated itself.
the old man, hoping for a drop of mercy, finally caved in and limply tilted his head to the side with the little strength he had left in his withering body, a faint whimper leaving his lips, his dull eyes almost shutting and rolling to the back of his head. the silver haired boy followed the old man's gaze, his eyes landing on a rather traditional, neat looking house. was that house always there? he doesn't remember seeing it earlier when he got a look over the village- tho it looks quite empty…
he made a hum of acknowledgment, before the sharp tip of his katana came down and cut the dying man's life short, putting him out of his misery, before pulling the blood covered katana out of the soft tissue and gripping it in his closed fist, taking firm yet careful strides towards the place of residence, making sure to keep all of his senses on high alert, looking out for even the slightest of movements.
with all of the villagers dead the forest sure was quiet.
he slid the door aside, stepping inside. rays of the early sun shone in through the thin papers of the doors and the window's, lightening up the house slightly.
kakashi cautiously looked around the otherwise dark house, he quietly stalked around the shadows, checking every single room and door there was intensely, the house was…eerily empty, but i suppose that was for the better.
he remembers the man looking at the house when he asked for the scroll…was the man playing tricks on the hound or was he truly pointing him to the right direction? he decided to not take any chances and began to search, putting his katana away and getting to it.
he searched, **everywhere*
everywhere it could possibly be at least, out of desperation he even began to look through the most unusual places, every room, every drawer, every floor, wall, lamps, curtains and so on,,,, but he found nothing.
just as he was about to give up this house and curse the now dead man under his breath for wasting his time so much, he was startled out of his thoughts by the loud and ear piercing cries of what sounded like an infant, coming from the direction of a closed wall. it was still loud despite being somewhat muffled due to the wall.
the sound made him tense up, straightening his posture even more as he reached for his weapon once again, frowning behind his mask- was this some sort of cheap trick? to take him down? there was no way that was an actual infant crying…
–
he had gotten inside the bedroom, slowly pushing the creaking brown wood door he had found that led to the secret room open, his grip tightening around the hilt of his katana, ready to strike or disable any form of trap or attack.
but he once more stood dumbfounded, finding nothing but a single beautifully carved wooden crib and (as he rightfully assumed) a baby laying inside of it, there were no windows or other doors or..really anything else in the bedroom, aside from the drawer in the farway side of the wall, the room was very much so empty, lightening up by one singular lamp, and now by the natural light let in thanks to the open door kakashi left gaping.
he stepped closer, before standing right besides the crib, gazing down at the child, not making a move.
the infant squirmed in the crib, tiny fists rubbing against it's cheeks in frustration as it wailed, likely longing for the familiar comfort of its guardian's embrace. its small, round and chubby face red with tears, its throat scratchy and sore from crying out for so long- perhaps it's sleep was disturbed by the screams and horror filled cries of his clan members as kakashi slashed their throats and ripped out their hearts without a second thought. either way, that thing seemed upset and it was disturbing.
kakashi sheathed his katana once more, ignoring the upset infant as he searched the room, he wasn't really shocked or surprised by the revelation of the infant, it wasn't as rare as one might think for people of his rank and in his field of work to murder children in cold blood. he has seen it more than he can remember. he himself tried to avoid it as much as he could, for example now, he had no reason to harm the infant. or so he hoped.
thanks to the usual unbearable guilt that ate away at his shame filled, dead heart , he didn't find the energy in himself to mourn for the innocent infant, that was now an orphan and were surely to die soon due to hunger or something of that kind, because of the ruthless acts of one single shinobi.
'this is a common thing' he told himself, as unfortunate as that was, it was true.
so, he focused his mind on only finding the scroll and getting out of the suffocating atmosphere as quick as he possibly could, he had already wasted enough time.
–
He stood next to the crib, frowning with confusion and frustration after he searched the empty room(tho there wasn't much to search anyways), there was nothing in the thin walls, nothing in the wooden floor, certainly nothing useful in the single chest-of-drawers in the otherwise empty room.
he stared down at the now quiet child, the much to loud cries of the infant had began to annoy and overwhelm the young adult, so he had shoved a pacifier he had found in the drawer in its mouth hoping for its silence, it worked, surprisingly enough.
both of them were staring at each other now, unblinking, the big, innocent eyes of the child were curiously staring up at the masked man staring down at it's small body, the innocent and purity radiating off the clueless infant made him feel even more disgusted with himself,
sadness and confusion visible in the child's features. he simply sighed.
a gloved claw reached down, the bloody hand hesitantly inching closer to the curious baby, before a finger ever so gently touched the soft, rosy chubby cheek of the child, the only sound that could be heard the occasional chirping of birds outside and the suckling noises of the infant enjoying his pacifier, breathing and making baby noises, for some reason he was drawn to the poor child, maybe it was due to the fact that he just ruined it's life(not like that was anything new.), a future that never came to be, who knew who the child could have been one day?
that aside, now that the wailing had stopped and he finally had a few moments to properly gather his thoughts, he realized he could very clearly feel incredible chakra waves coming off of
.….the infant?
it confused the hound, had he been that out of it that he didn't notice it before?
no, it definitely wasn't there when he entered. even in a disillusioned state there is no way he could have possibly ignored such a thing.
he pulled his hand back, recoiling into himself with a hidden grimace upon noticing the small blood stain he had left on the already rosy cheek of the infant, with the blood of its own clan, its own people.
it was poetically tragic, in a sick, twisted way.
he shook his head, taking a quick, deep breath to calm his nerves, he did not have the time nor the energy for panic or anything of that kind. he was about to turn around and walk away to search the empty house more thoroughly than he already had done so, before the baby moved to its side, the soft, small blanket that was covering it body this whole time gently falling off of it's small chubby body, showing a long, dark scar on the side of the unsuspecting child, now curiously squeezing and inspecting a small plush toy in his crib.
the scar caught the interest and attention of the silver haired hatake.
he reached down once more, touching the dark scar, quickly drawing his hand back once again, this time with an unexpected sharp intake of breath, which escaped him before he could stop it.
–
this chakra...it was powerful, far beyond what a normal, regular infant should possess. It was wild, untamed, and surging in subtle pulses like a heartbeat. his mind raced with questions. What clan had he just obliterated? why was a child with this level of chakra hidden so thoroughly? Could this be why the mission was assigned to him? why and *how* hadn't they know about this?
kakashi straightened, his hand hovering near the edge of the crib, uncertainty rooting him in place. the gravity of the situation sank deeper into him with each passing second. If this was what the hokage wanted him to retrieve… if this child was the objective... This wasn’t a retrieval mission. It was an assassination, masked as something cleaner. a loose end to be tied. a threat to be eliminated before it could grow….a part that was kept secret from him.
his stomach twisted violently. the contents he’d suppressed earlier surged up once more, burning his throat as he forced it down. his shaking hands curled into trembling fists as he took a step back, then another. his gaze flickered to the open door, sunlight spilling through, a tempting reminder of the world outside. he could leave. walk away and never look back. lie and say there was no scroll for him to return, that he saw nothing.
but he knew he wouldn’t. he couldn’t.
the third hokage had sent him here for a reason, and Kakashi needed answers. this child wasn’t ordinary—not by a long shot, clearly. and though his ANBU training screamed at him to follow orders, his instincts, his humanity, screamed louder.
he had already done the unspeakable, wiping out an entire clan without hesitation. but this? killing a baby? A defenseless infant, ignorant of its own existence?
kakashi hated the ANBU. he hated the mask he wore and the cold-hearted monster it turned him into. but this was beyond even the horrors he was tolerant to.
with trembling hands, he moved the crib’s blanket aside. There, tucked against the baby’s side, was a folded piece of paper. kakashi frowned, hesitating, his gloved fingers brushing against it, before finally unfolding it.
the handwriting was hurried, almost desperate, clearly written in a rush.
"please, if you’re reading this, show mercy. this child is innocent. she carries a burden too heavy, but she is not the cause of it. protect her."
the words struck like a kunai to the chest. kakashi reread the note, the meaning sinking in slowly. the child stirred in her sleep, her small mouth working against the pacifier as if in response.
"save her."
the words echoed louder in his mind, clashing violently against the cold, clinical orders he’d been given. the rules swimming in his head.
his mission was clear: retrieve the scroll, eliminate threats, and return. yet, here he stood, paralyzed, staring at this child. a baby who should’ve been nothing more than another mark on his kill list, a quick and easy one. and for the first time in years, kakashi felt an unbearable resistance to following orders.
he stared down at her. big and dark glossy eyes fluttered open for a moment, locking with his in a sleepy haze before drifting shut again. her tiny chest rose and fell with each quiet breath, and he could feel the overwhelming chakra radiating from her with every beat of her small heart.
kakashi inhaled sharply, his decision made before he even realized it.
he reached into the crib, his gloved hands trembling slightly as he lifted the baby into his arms. she was so small, so fragile, and yet she carried an impossible weight—he truly fid pitied the child.
when kakashi stepped out of the house, the sunlight felt different against his skin, warmer somehow, as if the world itself had shifted. the child stirred in his arms but didn’t wake, her tiny hands clutching weakly at his vest.
and as he walked away from the ruins of the village, cradling the child who had already changed everything, kakashi knew one thing with certainthishe didn't care what others said, he wasn't gonna let any harm come to her.