Finding home

Hashirama had spent the last couple of months consolidating his powers and gaining more allies. Together with his cousin Touka they had been working to find who in their clan would side with him if it came down between him and his father.

He still hasn't found out what his father had done to push Tobirama away but he knew it had to be horrible. The only thing that gave him some comfort was that whatever it was couldn't have been too unforgivable. Otherwise he was confident she would have killed him before letting him get away with it. She had a spine of steel and would do what was needed if it came down to it, despite the consequences she may have faced.

But he just couldn't think of what would be so bad she would leave but not bad enough she would kill him. He had watched his father beat her down in the name of ‘training’ more times than he could count. He had pushed her until she didn't feel safe showing emotions any more, and he had basically caused the whole clan to see her as a rabid dog on a leash more than a person with the way he always called her a demon and only spoke praise when referring to her ability to kill. None of that has ever caused her to so much as flinch. Truthfully the only time he had ever seen her stand up to Butsuma was when she had been protecting him from their father.

What he knew for sure though, was that he couldn't trust a word out of his father's mouth. When Hashirama got home from his mission his father had informed him that Tobirama had been sent on a long term infiltration mission. Which was unusual for her because she had such distinctive looks. But he hadn't had reason to doubt his father.

That is until he went to bed and discovered the note under his pillow. It took every bit of his willpower not to confront his father right then and there. But even he knew not to let his father know he was on to him. When backed into a corner who knew what he would do. All he knew was that he could no longer trust him.

Which is what led him to where he was now. Trying to turn his clan against his father so that when he forced his father to give up his position as clan head they would side with him. So far he had about half of the elders siding with him, and over half of his clansmen, the rest were a mix of neutral and as warmongering as his father.

Unfortunately they weren't siding with him the way he would have wished, which was to end the war with the Uchiha, but that his father was pushing them too hard and it was beginning to hurt the clan. That they needed to stop inciting conflicts to give them a chance to recover and build up their finances again. This winter had done a lot to convince them that Hashirama had a better plan for their future. Rations were tight as they didn’t have the money to buy extra rice and wheat like they usually did. And without Tobirama leading their hunting parties, using her sensing to find game, they had been short on meat as well.

He hoped her absence was reminding the clan of all she did for them. Though they always seemed to take it as a given rather than being thankful for her help.

He let out a sigh and got up from his desk, he had been going over clan finances again. They needed to take more missions, there was nothing else to be done. But they were already stretched so thin. Butsuma had their forces on double guard duty. He was paranoid about something though he wouldn’t tell anyone what that was.

This might be the point he was finally forced to confront his father and push to take over leadership. But he knew Butsuma wasn’t going to take that lying down, and it really came down to was Hashirama willing to fight his father to force his point. And if he did would it start a civil war within the clan?

There were just so many unknowns. He wished Tobirama was here. She would know what to do. He had always used her as his sounding board for his ideas. Even when he had dreams of peace, she would hear him out and give him ideas on how they could make it happen one day.

It's fine, he was going to be clan head one day, sooner rather than later if things went right, he needed to be able to make decisions on his own. And besides, at least he had Touka on his side. She had been instrumental in his plans to sway the clan to his side.

Hashirama donned his armor and went to meet with his father. He always wore his armor when speaking to his father. He wanted to remind him of his strength. He hoped if he kept up the reminder his father would fight less when he finally made his move.

As he was walking out of the house he saw a hawk come flying towards him, holding his arm out it landed on him. He pulled a scroll off its leg, causing the hawk to take off again, and saw the Hatake symbol pressed into it.

That was weird. He couldn’t remember the last time he had spoken to his grandmother, or anyone else in their clan. What could she be sending him a letter about?

Quickly opening it he saw it was in fact a letter from her.

He was almost brought to his knees with relief. She wrote with word on Tobirama! She was safe. Though, the letter was vague on the details. He wasn’t sure what it meant that she was sending the letter and not Tobirama. Was she not actually with them? If not, where was she? He had hoped that was where she went but he had doubted it due to how long it had taken to hear word from her.

If Hashirama had any less faith in his sister he would have worried she wasn’t alive. But he of all people knew how capable she was.

****************

Tobirama felt like she was surrounded by white noise. Izuna was pale and unconscious. He was losing too much blood. There was no way he would survive this. She couldn't breathe.

She had to make a choice. It was either her or Izuna. Could she just stand by and let Izuna die though?

She found herself flashing back to every moment of the last few months where Izuna would take care of her, every time he made her laugh, the way the checked on her and the baby every day.

There really wasn’t any choice was there?

Grabbing Madaras arm she pulled him away from Izuna to face her.

“I need you to trust me right now. I can save Izuna but you have to promise me you wont do anything until after he is stable.”

“What? What are you talking about? What can you do?”

“Madara, promise me.”

She let the seriousness show in her face and stared straight into his eyes.

“Okay, of course, help him please.”

“First I need you to do something for me. There is a chakra seal on the back of my neck. I need you to push as much chakra as you can into it. And when it breaks you have to remember your promise. You have to let me save him first. Then you can do whatever you want.”

Madara flicked his sharingan on and focused completely on her face. Coming to a decision he nodded and did as she asked. With a burst she felt her chakra flow back into her, but she didn’t have time to enjoy having access to it again. She pushed Madara out of her way and placed her hands on Izuna's stab wound, her hands glowing green.

All movement and noise came to an immediate stop. Everyone was watching her.

She couldn’t help but mourn the life she had here. She would miss the kindness everyone had shown her. She would never forget those calm nights hanging out with everyone around the kotatsu. She would hold these memories dear until her end. Which was now probably closer than ever. She sent a silent apology to her baby that she had probably just doomed to die with her.

Tobirama didn’t have time to focus on that though, she had to put all her energy into saving Izuna, once she started healing him she realized the damage was worse than she had thought. It wasn’t just one stab wound. He had a puncture in his lung, a stab into his stomach and poison coursing through his veins. She put her focus on his lung first, that was the most critical. It was going to be a long night of healing. She just hoped they wouldn’t stop her before she was finished.

No one spoke the entire time she healed him, they all stood around for hours just watching her. Madara, Tajima, and Mai, who had been called in to help treat Izuna, were silent.

She watched as color started to come back into his skin and his breathing became even again. With a sigh she finally stepped back, turning to face Tajima first.

“He’s going to be okay, if you are willing to let me, I can heal him more tomorrow. I don't have enough chakra to finish it all today but he should be out of the worst danger. I've stopped the poison from getting to his heart but he will still need an antidote to clear it completely from his system. If you don't trust me enough to finish, I understand and it's probably healed enough that Mai can finish treating him and he should make a full recovery. I believe the poison was one of the more common that the Hagormo uses, I assume you have an antidote for it.”

Taking a breath she kept talking before anyone else had a chance to say anything. “I’m sorry for lying to you all, I promise I have no ill intent toward your clan, I really was just trying to get to the Hatake. I understand that you probably can't forgive me for this, and I submit myself to whatever you feel you need to do.”

Tajima nodded his head at her explanation before speaking. “If you aren’t Hatake what clan are you from? Why did you hide the fact that you had chakra from us?”

Madara stopped her from answering by questioning her first. “Are you the White Demon?’

Tajima instantly turned from watching her to looking at Madara. Tobirama flinched from him. Then bowing her head she answered, “yes.”

“How?! I have seen him on the battlefield, he is bigger than you are! But I know that chakra anywhere. I have only felt one person with icy chakra like his.”

“I wear thick armor and heels when I fight to make me look both broader and taller.”

Madara had a look of deep betrayal as he asked, “was any of it true?”

Tobirama felt anger fill her up, she snapped her head up to glare straight into his spinning sharingan, no not the sharingan she knew, it was something else, she had never seen eyes like that before. But she didn’t allow this new unknown sharingan stop her from looking him in the eyes and making sure he saw every bit of her anger at his question.

“Yes! Only it was worse than you know. It wasn’t some unknown clan head that brought me to those men. No, it was my own father. He had one of his men slap a chakra sealing tag on me so I couldn’t fight back, so I had no chance to run away. Then he dragged me into a room with 5 men, whoI had fought alongside, men who were closer to my fathers age than my own and told them they could do whatever they wanted to me as long as I left the room pregnant. And then once they were done he escorted me to my room where he called me a good girl and thanked me for my service to the clan. All because he decided he wanted another backup heir to Hashirama because I wasn’t good enough for him. You have no idea what I went through! When I first saw you I resigned myself to death, but you didn’t recognize me and I thought maybe things would be okay. All you had to do was let me go and I could continue to the Hatake and they would protect me. I am sorry I lied to you, but I had to protect myself.”

She spoke fast, hardly taking a breath. Tobirama hadn’t intended to say all of that, but she was just so angry. How dare he doubt her. He had seen her at her worst, flinching from everyone, the nightmares that still plagued her. He knew and yet he questioned her anyway.

**************

Madara didn’t know what to think. He knew she had been hiding something from them. But he had never expected it to be this. He was at a complete loss for words. But he couldn't stop looking into her eyes.

Everything she just said was true. Of that he was certain. He warred between wanting to go to the Senju compound and break down their gates to kill Butsuma and all those men involved, and wanting to shake her for betraying him.

Despite the betrayal he was feeling he couldn’t stop the feelings he still had for her, and the desire he had to protect her.

He was pulled from his thoughts by his father.

“What you did was brave. And extremely risky, you had to know there was a chance we would just kill you outright. Why did you do it?”

Tobira broke his gaze to look over at his father, who he now noticed also had his sharingan out. “I couldn’t let him die. I know it's only been a few months but he’s become like family to me. And I would do anything to keep him safe.”

Truth.

What did that even mean? She was the White Demon for fucks sake! She wasn’t supposed to save Uchiha lives, she should be thankful her rival was going to die! He didn’t have a chance to voice his own questions because his father was speaking again.

“That's a strong sentiment from someone who has been fighting and killing my clan for years. How old were you when you first stepped onto the battlefield?”

“I was 5 when my father first brought me with him. And things changed, I no longer see your clan as I once did. I grew up being told you were monsters, your clansmen killed my youngest brother when he was only 11. Of course I fought you. But then you all welcomed me, and treated me like I was one of you. It made me realize your clan wasn’t what we had been told, in fact your clan might even be better than mine. I have never felt safer than being with you all.”

“I actually believe you. But I don't know what to do about this. How can I let our clan's enemy walk free? I find I’ve come to care about you and that baby you are carrying. Not to mention I don't want to make your life harder than your father has already made it. Will you promise to not lay a hand on anyone in my clan? And to use your skills in the service of the Uchiha?”

Madara couldn’t believe his ears, and from the look on Tobira’s face she couldn’t either.

She nodded, with her face in clear shock.

“As long as I’m not used against the clan of my birth, yes. I may hate my father and his followers but I won't betray my brother.”

Holy shit, she was Hashirama's little sister! He had tried to kiss Hashirama’s sister! He was going to kill him!

Wait. Did Hashirama know where she was now?

“I have to ask after hearing how young you were when you first took to the field, how old are you? I’ve always assumed you were the same age as Izuna, but now I’m doubting you are as old as I thought you were.”

“I’m 17 Tajima-sama”

Oh it just kept getting worse. She was only 17?? He was 4 years older than her! He knew Hashirama was a year older than him and had just assumed she was as close in age with him as he was with Izuna, who was only 2 years younger than him.

Yup. Hashirama was going to kill him.

Wait, hold on. Did his father say she could stay with them? He wasn’t going to throw her in a cell?

“Younger than I thought. Your father truly is a monster, I stand by my promise, I’m going to kill him. How does that make you feel? Are you going to fight me on this?”

“I’m only sad I wont be able to see it.”

Tajima laughed. “You have a fire in you girl, almost as much as an Uchiha. I’m impressed. Tomorrow, finish healing Izuna and then we can have a meeting and you can tell me what skills you have and we will find a way to make a place for you here. Unless you’d like to leave now and go to the Hatake. I won't stop you, though it does make more sense now that they were willing to give so much in thanks for saving you. How are you really related to Hatake Akari?”

“As I said she really is my grandmother, her daughter married my father. She was foolish enough to think herself in love and gave up her position as heir to join the Senju. Little did she know he would slowly break her down until she finally died giving birth to my younger brother. My grandmother has always hated my father and tried many times to convince my brother and I to leave. But Hashirama felt obligated to the clan because no one had strength like he was given with the mokuton, and I would never leave my brother. Well, until my father gave me no choice.”

Tajima nodded. “Are you okay to walk back to the house? You look shaky. Does Mai need to look you over?” He asked, waving over at Mai.

Madara had honestly forgotten she was here. But there she stood, completely silent against the wall just watching Tobira. He wondered what she was thinking.

“I’m fine.”

“Madara, come. Let's go home. Mai will you come get us if anything changes with Izuna?”

“Y-yes Tajima-sama.”

“I trust everything you heard tonight will stay in this room.”

“Of course.”

With that Tajima turned and walked out. Madara wasn’t sure he wanted to leave Izuna’s side. But his father had asked him to come back to the house and he had seen the way Tobira had healed him. He believed her when she said he would be okay.

They walked in silence back to the house.

Once they walked in, Tajima bid them goodnight and went to his room. Tobira looked like she was about to do the same but he grabbed her hand and stopped him.

“Is this what has been holding you back?”

What was wrong with him? His brother had almost just died, he found out the girl he had come to have feelings for was lying to him, and was in fact one of the most fearsome shinobi the Senju had, and he wanted to talk to her about his feelings? Apparently yes. That was his priority.

She turned back to him.

“Yes. I couldn’t lie to you more than I had to, I couldn't let you come to have feelings for me when I was lying to you.”

“Are you lying about anything else?”

“My name is actually Tobirama, I don't actually know why I told you Tobira, I don't think anyone outside the Senju knows my name. But it's what my brother called me and it was what came to mind.”

“Do you have feelings for me?”

She held her breath for a moment before speaking, once again looking right into his eyes.

“Yes.”

He didn’t say anything else, he just put his hands on either side of her face and pulled her to him. Kissing her breathless.

Seriously, what was wrong with him? Was he forever going to be ruled by his heart?

That's when it hit him. He didn’t just like her, it wasn’t just that he found her attractive. He loved her. That's why he couldn't help but go after her, no matter what else was going on. Its why her lies and her true identity meant nothing to him. An Uchiha’s love was all consuming, and once it was there it never went away.

As he kissed her all he could think was he had to convince her to stay. He didn’t want her to go to the Hatake and he didn’t want her to go back to Hashirama. He wanted to protect her and love her. He wanted to be a father to her baby.