Epilogue
“Bakabakashi, always doing things the hard way,” Obito sat by a purple fire, goggles glinting in the light.
Kakashi stares at Obito, memorizing the features of his friend’s face, “Obito? What am I doing here? Where are we?” He wants to look around, but he’s afraid Obito might disappear if he looks away for too long.
“I’m holding an intervention for you and the stupid shit you do!”
“I don’t do stupid shit.”
“That’s pretty much all you do. Your heroic, stupid bullshit! Silver-haired bastard… Do you remember when you realized that I was right that being a ninja is more than just following the rules? It’s also about protecting your friends. Nowhere in there did I teach you to do crazy suicide missions!”
“I still don’t see how that’s stupid bullshit.”
Obito flaps his hands around. “Of course you don’t. Genius Kakashi can’t see Obito’s point because he’s so smart! Let me enlighten you: You’ve gone completely off the rails! You’re protecting your friends, sure, but at the cost of your own body.”
“I will do whatever it takes to protect them.”
“Life isn’t black and white! Think of all the gifts you have; of the gift I gave you! Whether I want to admit it or not, you’re a fucking ninja genius. There should be a way for you to stay alive and protect your friends. Do both and figure it out!” Kakashi stared at him. He couldn’t believe he was being lectured by Uchiha Obito, of all fucking people, about sacrifice.
“I was half-crushed. I didn’t need my eyes anymore,” He seemed to know what Kakashi was thinking by just looking at him. “Oh, and another thing! If you go around will-nilly throwing your life away, then what was my eye worth, really? Are you in such a hurry to join us that you don’t want to enjoy your life anymore?” That last sentence hung in the air with a bit more of a sad tone than the rest of Obito’s upbeat intonation.
“You don’t need to punish yourself, Kashi,” Rin’s voice echoes. Kakashi turns around and they’re in the place where she died. Where he killed her. Where she killed herself. “It was my choice.” A cold chill enters his heart. “For what it’s worth, I’m sorry I used you to do it. I wish I had done it a different way now, seeing what it’s put you through.” She rubs her arm, looking down guiltily.
“I should have stopped it. Why wasn’t I strong enough?”
“It has nothing to do with strength. It was my choice… and I’m sorry I did it the way that I did,” Rin repeats the apology, looking at Kakashi.
Kakashi shakes his head, “Please, don’t apologize.”
Rin smiles, “I’ll stop when you stop.”
He exhales shakily. Obito walks up and the two of them smile. “Live, Kakashi. For us,” Rin says. Obito nods, rubbing his nose, “Quit being a moron, and tell sensei we say hi!”
Everything begins to fade, as if someone was lowering a set of blinds, and Kakashi runs towards them. “Wait!” He calls out, running towards them. “Don’t leave! Don’t leave me! Come back!”
Kakashi opens his eye and squeezes it shut; the light too bright. The lights switch off with some scolding that sounded suspiciously like Kushina. “Turn it down, you know, it’s too bright for him!” Menma’s little babbles fill the room and Kakashi tries opening his eye again.
His face feels naked, with no fabric against his mouth or chin. “My mask,” Kakashi murmurs, voice coming out as a croak. He felt too exposed like this.
Minato’s yellow hair enters Kakashi’s line of sight, “Sorry, Kakashi-kun, they had to sew the wound on your cheek up and they had to remove it. I brought you another one, just in case you wanted it.”
He reaches out his hand, which feels weirdly numb and floaty. Something pulls and Minato’s hand stops his wrists movement. “I’ve got it.” He loops a black medical mask over Kakashi’s ears. “This should hold you over for now.” Minato-sensei’s hands stayed wrapped around Kakashi’s wrist and hand as he settles down in his seat next to Kakashi. He let’s his hand be held, it felt nice, and he can’t remember the last time he felt like this since his dad-
“Am I high?” He asks drowsily. Minato nods.
“Perceptive, my pupil. They needed to give you something for your injuries, especially with your burn.” Kakashi groans. He discovered from the time with Guy, and from this whole situation, that he doesn’t like being under the influence of anything. Too easy to talk.
“We would prefer if you would talk more,” Minato answered. Fuck. Minato laughed a bit.
“It’s too vulnerable,” his mouth stumbles over the syllables.
“You have to be vulnerable around someone,” Minato answers quietly, squeezing his hand. Kakashi squeezes back. “The damage to your leg shouldn’t be permanent, but it will leave a nasty scar from the flames… Fire nature in the land of Mist, huh? Looks like they’re outsourcing.” Kakashi nods.
“Is Guy…” Minato nods. “He’s fine. I had to stop him from running two hundred laps around the village until his cracked ribs heal. He said something about going décor shopping?” Kakashi wrinkles his nose, imagining his childhood home turning an unbecoming shade of dark green. Minato laughs again, and Kakashi can’t help but smile in return.
“Sounds like having a roommate will be fun. We will have to come over more often and help with the garden harvest when it’s time,” he adds. Minato-sensei seems hopeful, his eyes seeming to ask Kakashi for something.
Kakashi resists the urge to push away and manages to say, “That would be nice, probably.” Minato’s smile could light a room right now. Kakashi takes pride in being responsible for making his sensei happy like that for once instead of making him frown. Kakashi shuts his eye, about to drift back into a dreamless sleep, when he remembers.
“Sensei, I almost forgot-“ Kakashi starts.
“The sanbi is secured. Everything is okay-“
“No, no, not that,” Kakashi counters. “It’s about Obito… and Rin…” Minato’s expression becomes stricken and Kakashi feels some regret in chasing away that smile Minato had and felt desperate to get it back. “They told me they wanted me to tell you that they say hello,” he whispers. Minato’s face crumples into a smile, his lip wobbles a little bit as his eyes fill with tears. Kakashi’s eye shuts again, unable to hold Minato-sensei’s gaze for any longer. No nightmares. Maybe drugs sometimes weren’t so bad. He feels a hand run through his hair, a comforting gesture.
The next time Kakashi came to consciousness, the room was empty. He found himself missing the people that were here last time. He scoots his hips up and sits, glancing down at the IV when his arm pulled. His head seems to float a bit as he somewhat bobs. Right. Drugs. Time to go home.
He uncovers his legs from under the blanket and looks at the huge swath of gauze. His leg is definitely going to scar, if the wrapping is anything to go by. He grimaced, knowing it wouldn’t be pleasant getting home with a leg injury; however, he was itching to get out of the hospital and get home. He wanted to settle into the quiet and remove himself. Summon his ninkin and snuggle into his bed with them like he used to do more often when he was younger. He missed that. He wanted to sit in his home and think about his Obito and Rin dream that probably just fueled by drugs… they had felt so real… He wanted to believe their words.
Kakashi’s fingers found the edge of the IV and removed it as gently as he could, wincing. He pushes himself with his hands to the side of the bed and looks down at his hospital gown. That’s right, his clothes must have been tossed, burned and bloodied. He looked left and right and saw the folded-up fabric to his left. Navy jonin blues and one of his regular masks.
He smiles in relief at the clothing and stands up to get dressed. “Woah,” he murmurs, leaning back against the bed. “Drugs,” he mutters. He could do this, he just needed to go slow. The first step that he took on his injured leg did not go well. He almost fell on his face, clutching the edge of the chair that had his clothes and swinging to land on his butt. “Ow.”
He reaches for his clothes again when the room stops moving. The shirt was easy enough, but the pants took some manipulation. When his hands brushed with his gauze, he resisted the urge to flinch. Memories of Guy’s worried face hovering above his own trickled back in. Thankfully, the pain medication was doing its job, was still pretty numbed up. On the other hand, he seems to be moving with the grace of a harbor seal, not a great side effect. He takes off his medical mask and reaches for his typical cloth mask when he hears the door open and freezes. Crap. Gold light spills in from the hallway.
“Forgetting something?” Kakashi tilts his head backwards until he could see the doorway. Guy stood there with a pair of Kakashi’s sandals in his hands, grinning. Smug bastard.
He frowns. “No,” he answers. Kakashi, forgetting about his mask for a moment. To prove his point, he grabs the edge of the chair and stands up. Kakashi turns to Guy, grinning at him in triumph before his balance starts to go and he was about to tumble backwards, before his friend darts forward, wrapping an arm around his middle to keep him upright.
“Stupid,” Guy insults him, and Kakashi almost breaks down there because it sounded so much like Obito. “Let’s go home?” Guy asks.
“Yeah, that would be good… Thanks, Guy,” he answers softly, voice a little raspy from disuse.
In the days following their mission, Kakashi notices the added knickknacks and television set in his home, as well as the extra bedroom becoming suspiciously dark green. Kakashi lets it happen. The knot in his chest, the one that he thought might be there forever, loosens a bit.
He looks out from his kitchen window, watching Guy, Minato, Kushina, and little Menma picking out vegetables and fruits from the garden. Menma must have eaten some strawberries because his mouth was smeared in red fruit juice. He smiles and looks beyond his precious living ones, seeing three figures out in the distance that he would recognize anywhere. The mantra of their names repeats in his mind and Kakashi decides from then on that he would follow Obito’s advice. Rin, Obito, Dad. Thank you.
FIN