Suicide
May, 1998
Tonks hadn't been able to stand the gnawing pain of worry in her stomach. Remus had, of course, done the noble argument thing, told her to stay with Teddy, and then Disapparated to the Hog's Head. Alone. Without her.
Well, Kingsley was going there too, but Tonks was pretty sure they didn't have a son together, and thus was not terribly comforted.
So she'd kissed Teddy lightly on the head, told her mother she was going out for some air, and Disapparated off to the Hog's Head right after him.
"Ginny," she puffed once having gotten through the portrait hole against the flow of the evacuating student body. "What are you doing in here?" she asked confusedly, unable to help her curiosity.
"I've been ordered to stay out of harm's way," Ginny replied bitterly, angry tears still shining on her face.
"You too, huh?" Tonks said with a half-smile, glancing nervously toward the exit.
"So what are you doing here?" Ginny asked moodily, catching a hold of herself now that she had company.
Before Tonks had the opportunity to reply, the portrait swung open again and a surprisingly agile elderly woman sprung out of it and landed gracefully on the carpeting. She turned and said a few magical words to the portrait behind her; it glowed momentarily and then made a loud suction noise, as though sealed. "Where is my grandson?" she asked the two women in front of her demandingly.
"Left with the crusade," Ginny explained unhappily, though slightly more cheerful now that she had company. "Not sure what's happening beyond that, I've been banished here under the pretence of protection." She rolled her eyes.
There was a quiet creak at the top of the stairs as the passage door was opened and shut quietly. Three pairs of feet came clambouring down. All three of the Room's guests turned to regard the invaders; Ginny relaxed visibly as Harry's face became visible, followed by those of Ron and Hermione.
"Ah, Potter," said the elderly woman immediately. "You can tell us what's going on."
"Is everyone okay?" Ginny and Tonks asked together.
"As far as we know," Harry said hurriedly. "Are there still people in the passage to the Hog's Head?"
"I was the last to come through," said Mrs. Longbottom. "I sealed it, I think it unwise to leave it open now Aberforth has left his pub. Have you seen my grandson?"
"He's fighting," Harry said distractedly.
"Naturally. Excuse me, I must go and assist him." Harry watched her go, and caught Tonks' eye as he followed her path. He frowned.
"I thought you were supposed to be with Teddy at your mother's?"
"I couldn't stand not knowing," she said with a plea in her voice. "She'll look after him... have you seen Remus?"
"He was planning to lead a group of fighters onto the grounds," Harry said, and that was all she needed; she sprinted up the staircase, through the door and down the corridor. She skidded to a halt in moments, however; an all-too-familiar angry cry from the grounds had caught her attention. She ran to the half-smashed window and squinted into the night, trying to find her husband in the group of fighters below. Ginny rushed moments later to her side and began shouting curses at the hooded figures below; Tonks promptly followed suit, taking the jets of light as an advantage in finding Remus amongst the crowd.
Aberforth roared something behind her; she turned immediately, barely registering the faces of Harry, Ron and Hermione. Aberforth had finished whatever he was saying about giants; Tonks felt almost feverish in her rush to find her husband. "Have you seen Remus?" she yelled after him as he sprinted away with students in tow.
"He was duelling Dolohov, haven't seen him since!"
The pit in Tonks' stomach grew. She didn't even process Ginny's comment as she sprinted down the nearest staircase, desperate to reach the grounds.
She ran out into the grounds, searching desperately around, and finally she spotted him against a castle wall, the deep lines in his face emphasized by fury. He was still fighting Dolohov, but Remus clearly had the upper hand; his wizarding skills usually hidden by modesty showed clearly in the calibre of curses and counter-jinxes that came from the end of his wand. Dolohov was slouched over, and though he was putting up a fair fight, sounded exhausted and weak. Tonks hurried up behind him all the same and cursed him silently from behind; Remus' shocked face was illuminated by the light of the spell.
"Dora!" he shouted, caught offguard by her appearance on the field. "What the hell do you think you're doing?"
"I'm helping you, Remus!" she shouted back, silently deflecting each one of Dolohov's spells with expertise. Remus was about to reply when he caught Bellatrix Lestrange out of the corner of his eye and turned to curse her before she had the chance to do the same to him.
"Go home, Dora!" he screamed between jets of light.
"I'm an Auror, Remus, I fight Dark wizards for a living! How can you expect me to sit at home, not knowing if you're alive or dead?"
"I don't want our son to end up like Harry!" he screamed desperately, far too much emotion dominating his actions; his spells shot over Bellatrix's head and into the castle wall, causing a constant shower of pebbles and dust. "He needs to have a mother, if not a father!"
"He can have both!" Dolohov was fading fast, and she lessened her attentions. "I couldn't..."
But she faltered as his expression turned from anguish to fear; he left his own battle and leapt physically toward Tonks. A flash of green light shot from the end of Dolohov's wand, but Dora was already on her way to the ground.
"Remus," she whispered. He lay on top of her, unmoving. "Remus. Get up. Remus." She struggled momentarily but finally shrugged him off. He rolled over onto his back and didn't make a single movement; his eyes stared emptily up at her as she crouched over him and shook his shoulders. "Remus. Remus."
"He isn't getting up, girlie," Dolohov's cold tone came from above her, weak but pleased. "Now face me and meet your own doom."
With incredible speed and grace that she never would have ordinarily managed, Tonks spun to her feet, raised her wand swiftly and, ignoring the words spoken clearly behind her, brought it