99. POPSLASH
“Chrissy, it hurts so much!”
“Honey, I know.”
“I want to be mad at Justin for not trying harder, for deciding that he couldn’t deal with the pressure and us always being apart. But I can’t! I know he’s hurting too!”
“He is, Britney. Just because he didn’t know how to deal with being your boyfriend any more, it doesn’t mean he stopped loving you. You know he still does.”
“That’s what hurts so much. I love him; he loves me. Why can’t we be together?”
“Honey, you know why.”
“I just want it to be the way it was!”
147. POPSLASH
{beep}
"It's Brit. Call me."
{beep}
"Me again. Call me."
{beep}
"Chrissy, why aren't you calling me?"
{beep}
"Ryan told you, didn't he? I told him not to! Jerk! It wasn't a big deal! He didn't have to tell!"
{beep}
"Come on, Chrissy. I'm sorry! Anyway, it was only one kiss! Justin kissed me! I didn't kiss him. Well, only a little. But I liked kissing you more!"
{beep}
"I got your message. Umm. You didn't tell me that you were going to the zoo with your Mom. Umm. That whole Justin thing? Can we just forget I said anything?"
148. POPSLASH
Britney wasn't sure if she liked Mandy's new hair. No, that wasn't right. She wasn't sure she liked the new Mandy that came with the new hair. She was more self-confident, more outgoing, more in control.
Mandy didn't ask for her opinion as often as she used to. She didn't show her the scripts that she'd read or the songs she'd written. She hadn't invited Britney to come to the studio to hear her record in over a month.
Mandy didn't need her any more and it scared her. She was afraid that Mandy had outgrown her and her love.
149. POPSLASH
Britney missed Christina with a bone-deep ache. She missed talking to her about everything and nothing. She missed holding her in the middle of the night. She even missed the jumble of cosmetics on the counter, the cause of many arguments. But what she missed most was knowing that someone loved her just as much as she loved them.
The hardest thing about not having her any more was not being able to tell anyone. No one knew they'd been together so no one knew they were apart. That's what hurt the most. It felt like Britney&Christina had never existed.
172. POPSLASH
"What the hell have you guys been doing? What were you thinking? Were you thinking at all?"
"But, Momma…"
"You know that you can not be Britney Spears and be married! Are you ready to give all this up? To give up the cars, the houses, everything that comes with this? Are you ready to throw it away? Are you ready to go back to Louisiana and be like all the other girls you grew up with?"
"But, Momma…"
"Don't but Momma me, Britney Jean. Are you ready?"
"No, Momma."
"We're going to annul this marriage today."
"Yes, Momma."
173. POPSLASH
She had known the moment that Jason had given in. His head bent down and his shoulders slumped. She'd been desperately hoping he could withstand the combined forces of her mother and her manager working in tandem.
They'd made so many plans. They had talked about going back to Louisiana, getting a house, having kids, and building a life together. He had made her believe it was possible. He'd convinced her they could make it if they stood together.
She whispered his name and he turned his face away from her.
Britney knew she shouldn't be disappointed. But she is.