“Cait!” Vi calls. When Cait doesn’t respond the first time, Vi says her name again and turns her gaze over to the bed. Cait’s lying on her back, facing the ceiling with her eye closed and her hair splayed out around her like a halo. When she still doesn’t answer, Vi decides it’s time to say, “Caitlyn,” because Caitlyn is her business name, and Vi means serious fucking business right now.
This does the trick. Cait’s head tilts towards her, a frown pinching her eyebrows. When she spots Vi, she sits up. “What are you doing with that?”
Vi grins at her and pulls the cloak tighter around her. “I’m wearing your dumb cape.” She twirls around once, and the cape follows her movements, drifting around her. The lights of Cait’s room blend around her as she spins, and the floor underneath tilts before she finds her balance again, and she feels so free. She loves Cait’s bedroom.
When the world stills again, she hides her face behind the collar of the cloak and looks at Cait through her lashes. “Look at meee ,” Vi taunts, now with an exaggerated attempt at Cait’s accent. “I’m a decorated officer. Commander Kiramman is my name. Caitlyn fucking Kiramman.” Vi snorts and pulls her face out of the cloak. She spreads her arms out, admiring the golden design in the light. “It’s snug in here. No wonder you liked it so much.”
“I didn’t,” Cait mutters, watching Vi. “I wanted to burn it.”
“ Nooo ,” Vi says, twirling around in it again. Her vision tips, but she doesn’t mind. She feels too important and shiny and warm to care. “You look so fucking good, though. You look like a candle. A really hot candle. I’d let you burn me.”
Cait shakes her head, but a small, hazy smile slips over her. “Can you come back? I’m starting to fall asleep.” Vi starts stepping forward with a new fervor, but then Cait puts her hand out. “Without that thing. I don’t want to look at it.”
Vi scoffs and wraps herself further into the cloak. “No way you’re telling me what to do. I’m Commander Kiramman. No one tells Commander Kiramman what to fucking do.”
“If you’re Commander Kiramman, what does that make me?”
“You’re just a cupcake.”
“Just a cupcake?”
“You’re the cupcake.” Vi grins. “You’re all the cupcakes in the world.” She starts stepping forward again, but something catches on her foot, and all of a sudden the world tumbles over her, mixes into a whirlwind of blue and orange and green and violet. Then an ache erupts in the heels of her hands, and when she looks up, she finds herself level with the floor.
A twinkling sound echoes around her, and Vi’s heart soars at the realization that it’s giggles. She made Caitlyn Kiramman giggle. The thought makes her smile, because she loves to hear Caitlyn Kiramman giggle. She starts to lift herself up into a sitting position, and as she does, a weight on her back starts to slide off, too.
Then a pair of feet block her line of vision, and she looks up to see Caitlyn Kiramman looking down at her. The golden lights of her bedroom arc around her like a halo, and Vi thinks that’s kind of fitting. She is an angel.
A smile crawls over Vi. “You’re so fucking tall.”
Cait laughs again, and the sound of it makes Vi’s heart flutter because she loves hearing her laugh. She sits down on her knees and reaches around Vi, and the weight that was on Vi’s back climbs away as Cait drags a blue cloak off her and tosses it to the side. Was Vi wearing that? No wonder her back felt so heavy.
Cait turns her gaze back to Vi again, and a new giddiness bubbles in Vi’s chest. Something tugs at her jaw, and then her head is being tilted up, and suddenly Vi can barely even see the rest of the surroundings; only Cait fills her line of sight. Her good eye glows green in the soft golden lighting of her room, and the scar on her other one flashes, and her hair swings down her shoulders, so soft and perfect and beautiful.
Vi’s smile melts even wider, and she finds herself crawling forward on her hands as Caitlyn pulls. “Wow,” she breathes. “You’re hot.”
Cait smiles, and the pressure on Vi’s jaw intensifies. She can feel the insides of her cheeks sinking into her teeth, and it makes her heart full. “You’re precious when you’re drunk,” Cait says, her voice echoing around Vi’s eyes.
As Cait leans forward with the prettiest smile in the world, Vi reaches and pulls her along into her lap. Her arms rest against Cait’s waist, and she can feel the warmth of her skin through the thin fabric of her nightshirt. Something falls out of Vi’s chest, something airy and soft, and Vi realizes she’s laughing. “Who says I’m drunk?”
Caitlyn fixes her with a raised eyebrow, and the sight makes Vi’s stomach flutter. An audible sigh floats out of her, and she eases herself backward. She feels like she’s on a cloud. Except when she twists her head to the side, she realizes it’s just Cait’s bed cushioning her head. Cait has a really soft fucking bed.
“I say you’re drunk,” Cait says, and then she tilts her head a little, and a new ray of light shines right past her, and Vi’s heart swells. Her mouth falls open because, wow, Cait is so fucking pretty. She’s so pretty that Vi wants to bite a pillow.
So Vi tugs Cait forward, pulls her closer so that she can feel her chest pressing into her own. And not only is she fucking pretty, but she’s fucking warm. Of course she is. And also she smells like violets. She smells so good. Vi wants to lick her, and that want turns into Vi kissing her, and she can feel Caitlyn’s arms tighten around the back of her neck, feels her hands fluttering through her hair, and she tugs Caitlyn even closer. Maybe if Vi tries hard enough, she can tattoo Cait into her skin.
Vi pulls back to meet Cait’s eyes, and huff of amusement falls out of her. “I’m drunk on love,” she says, tucking a piece of hair behind Cait’s ear, and then something catches her eyes: the cuff piercing. She leans forward and gently touches it. When did she get that? Then she meets Cait’s eye again, and she doesn’t even remember what she was looking at. “Because I fucking love you.”
Cait’s cheeks flush softly, and Vi touches them. She wants to soak in her heat under her fingertips. Vi drags her knees in and Cait leans back against her thighs. Her legs embrace Vi’s waist, and Vi feels so happy because she loves to be between Caitlyn Kiramman’s legs. Her legs are so fucking cool. Vi runs a hand over Cait’s thigh, soaks in the goosebumps on her skin, the growing hair trying to poke out. Vi knows Cait likes to shave her legs; she says it gives her an excuse to stay in the bath longer. Vi hopes she lets her be the one to shave it next time. Then she’ll give her a real reason to stay in the bath longer.
Vi presses a kiss to her knee, then leans her head against it as she looks back up at Cait, and a brand new smile warms her. “Are you not drunk? Last I checked, you were a fucking lightweight.”
“Which means I know my limits.”
Vi scoffs. “Okay, Commander Cupcake. Who was the one ranting about the difference between a blimp and an airship fifteen minutes ago?”
Cait tugs on Vi’s bottom lip, and the touch steals Vi’s breath from her. Her grip on Cait’s thigh tightens. “Remind me, who just fell over on my cape?”
“You did. Remember, I’m you. I’m Caitlyn Kiramman.”
“Which means I’m also Caitlyn Kiramman.”
“No, you’re Cupcake.” Vi tugs Caitlyn’s finger from her lip and kisses it, then holds it gently between her teeth. Caitlyn giggles as she licks it, and Vi is so fucking happy right now. She loves feeling Caitlyn on her, loves tasting her, loves being surrounded by only her.
Vi leans forward again, this time to kiss her on the mouth, but the momentum sends her head spinning and instead she lands against Caitlyn’s shoulder.
“Myyyyy bad,” Vi murmurs into her shoulder. She should really lift her head, but Cait is so warm and soft, and she smells so good. She presses a kiss to Cait’s shoulder, but now, even so still in Caitlyn’s embrace, the world starts tilting under her, and she closes her eyes. “Ohhhh.”
The hands in Vi’s hair start crawling away, onto her shoulders, and it tickles. Vi can’t help giggling, and the sound of her own giggles makes the color behind her eyelids spin in this really ugly combination of red and green and blue. Then, for a brief moment, she’s floating, before something soft hits the back of her neck again. When she opens her eyes, she’s staring up at the ceiling, the drapes of Cait’s bed posts fluttering overhead.
She doesn’t move her head, but something makes her gaze flick down, and she finds herself staring at Cait through her lashes. Caitlyn fucking Kiramman. Most beautiful girl in the whole world. A smile slips over her and she closes her eyes again.
“Vi?” Cait’s voice calls, and it’s enough to bring Vi to open her eyes again. Her face is blurry, but Vi thinks she can see a smile on her. Except it looks strange. Not totally happy. Why doesn't Cait look happy? Tears spring into Vi’s eyes. She just wants to see Cait happy.
“Are you alright?” Cait’s voice rings around Vi’s head, but this time it feels something closer to gongs the way it reverberates through Vi’s skull. And Vi fucking loves Cait’s voice, maybe even secretly gets turned on any time she just says a word in that posh little accent, but this just feels downright uncomfortable.
“Yeahhhh,” Vi says, closing her eyes again. “I’m fiiiiine. But I think I should just keep my head here for a little bit.”
Cait scoffs. “And you said you weren’t drunk.”
Vi hums, but she doesn’t feel like answering. She just wants to feel Cait breathe against her. A pair of hands crawls over her face, warm and slightly calloused, and a smile tugs at Vi’s lips. She wonders how she even got here, with the hottest girl in the world on her lap, breathing through the alcohol buzzing in their bodies.
“My head feels funny,” Vi sighs. Her words bounce around her ears. “Can you kiss me?”
A beat of silence passes before Cait speaks. “How is me kissing you going to help you?” But Vi can feel her voice on her lips anyway, so close she can almost taste her words.
“You solve all my problems,” says Vi. “All of the world’s problems could be solved by a kiss from Caitlyn Kiramman. Commander Cupcake.”
Cait snorts. “If only it were that easy.” Then her lips brush against Vi’s, not quite a kiss just yet, but Vi can still feel the smile against her lips. “But I do like solving your problems.”
Then she catches Vi’s lips in her own, and Vi’s heart explodes.
Cait’s thumbs press under Vi’s chin, tilt her head further back, and Vi can feel her tongue against hers, warm and soft and familiar. A desperate frown pinches Vi’s brows, and she brings a hand to the back of Cait’s head, trying to pull her in deeper, trying to swallow her whole.
As if in response, Cait drags one hand down, painful and deliberate as she pulls it over Vi’s neck, down her chest, teases the hem of Vi’s shirt. Her fingers feel like matches dragging down Vi, as if she’s looking for something to ignite her fire.
“Fuck,” Vi mutters. It’s kind of embarrassing how turned on she is; Cait’s barely even done anything. But also Cait is just amazing, and anything she does drives Vi crazy, drunk or not.
Cait huffs a laugh against Vi’s lips, and then a hand slips under Vi’s shirt. Vi’s neck arches further at the feel of her fingertips against her stomach, against her sternum. She feels like a painting, the way Cait’s hands brush over her, carving over the lines of her body. But then she presses a hand against Vi’s breast, and at first Vi doesn’t mind; she welcomes the pressure building at the pit of her stomach. But the second time Cait does it, the ugly red and green and blue colors behind Vi’s eyes come back, and the dizziness in her head feels a little worse. She sighs and then, slowly, painfully, she pulls Cait’s hand out.
“Sorry,” she mutters. “Is it okay if we just… hold each other?”
Vi’s eyes open, if only to stop the ugly colors, and she meets Cait’s gaze. Through the haze building up in her vision, Cait’s eye is a star in Vi’s focus. It’s a pretty blue, prettier and bluer than the one behind Vi’s eyelids. She can’t tell if Cait’s smiling or frowning, but when Cait leans forward and presses a kiss to Vi’s forehead, a wave of relief falls over her. “Of course,” Cait says. Then, almost nervously, she adds, “Sorry. I got carried away.”
For some reason, the nervousness in her voice makes Vi’s chest ache. She made Cait feel bad. She hates making Cait feel bad. An ache presses against Vi’s throat, and she tries to swallow it away.
A thumb brushes against her cheek, and Cait says, “Why are you crying?”
Vi says, “I made you sad,” and she’s surprised at how badly it hurts to talk. She can barely get a word over the lump in her throat.
“You didn’t.” Cait smiles at her now, a soft and warm smile, and Vi’s heart swells at the sight. “Can I tell you a secret?”
“I love secrets.”
Cait brushes a thumb against Vi’s lip, then leans forward and presses her face into Vi’s neck. Her hair tickles Vi’s shoulder, and Vi leans her head on top of Cait’s. Cait’s arms wrap around her waist now, and Vi runs her fingers through the back of Cait’s hair. It’s so soft. It's so pretty.
“You make me so happy,” Cait says into her shoulder, and Vi shivers at the heat of her words. “Every time I have to go to some meeting without you, that’s what makes me sad. I only like the meetings where I can go with you. I love hearing you tell the council to go fuck themselves when they say something you don’t like.”
“They deserve it.”
“They do.” Then Cait pulls away and gazes at Vi, and the way she watches Vi, it makes her head spin in a really good way. “I love you .”
Vi’s chin trembles. Caitlyn Kiramman loves her . Vi closes her eyes and sighs, and Cait kisses her shoulder. “You’re such a fucking cupcake,” Vi mutters. “You’re too sweet.” Then a grin creeps over Vi. “You want to know a secret?”
“Always.”
Vi presses her cheek to the side of Cait’s head. “I think I’m drunk,” she whispers.
“That wasn’t a secret. Your head is rolling all over the place.”
“That explains why I’m so dizzy.”
Cait snorts, then she places her hands on either side of Vi’s face, and the grin on Vi’s face grows wider now. She loves feeling Cait on her. “Maybe it’s time to go to bed.”
Vi nods, but now that Cait’s mentioned the prospect of having to stand up and move, her head starts to feel heavy again. Cait shifts against Vi, but Vi doesn’t want to get up, so she just tugs on Cait’s waist. “Wait. Not yet.” Before Cait can respond, she presses Cait’s body into hers, and Cait relaxes. “Give me a minute. I just want you right now.”
Cait sighs against Vi, but she gives her a minute anyway. More than a minute. Five minutes. And with each passing second, Vi’s head grows a little bit heavier.
The ugly red and green and brown burst in Vi’s eyes again, and she frowns. Suddenly Cait’s breathing feels too loud against her, her skin too hot. But Vi doesn’t want to let go, not yet.
Cait sits up, and the movement makes Vi feel even hotter. She kind of wants to peel her skin off.
“Vi?”
“I’m okayyy,” Vi says, but her words feel kind of like cotton in her mouth now. The ground tilts a little too much, and she presses the back of her hand to her eyes. She waits a moment, trying to will the world to stop moving. But it doesn’t. The ground starts pressing a little too hard into her right leg now, and with a start, she realizes that she’s tilted over slightly.
Her head falls back against the bed and even though it’s so soft, her skull pulses and the colors behind her eyes burst in an ugly brown. “Ohhh,” she groans. “I think that last shot was a bad idea.”
A curtain of cold falls over Vi, and when she opens her eyes, she finds Cait standing over her. Even through her haze, she can see something soft and loving in her features, and Vi wants to smile, but the colors around her are starting to twist.
Cait holds her hand out. “Bathroom?”
Vi nods. “Bathroom.”