One thing Viktor loved about the lab was the way the moon would break in through the windows at night. It was calming, to see simmering wisps of white light engulf the metal tables and bubbling vials. Watch as the stars came out and drew pictures in the sky one could see if the simply held a little imagination.
Viktor's mother once taught him about the stars, in a rare moments she wasn't exhausted from a day's work in the mines. She'd sat him down on the wobbling roof of their humble home and pointed out each constellation with gentle hands and comforting whispers. His mother was always gentle and always quiet. Viktor remembered that most about her, even if some days he couldn't quite picture her face as clearly as he once was able.
She called him 'little star' when he was younger, a nickname Viktor held close to his heart even now.
But as beautiful as the moonlight was, Viktor couldn't help but favor the sun these days. The bright, golden glow of the sun reminded him of Jayce. Strong and bright, resilient, brave, and well, good-looking. Yes, the sun and Jayce were one in the same in Viktor's eyes. Both brightened up the world......and both were out of reach from the distant moon.
Viktor's small smile faded as he sank further into his seat, the beautiful moonlight seeming colder than it did moments ago.
The sun and the moon. Always grouped together, but never really together.
It was the sun and the moon. Not the sun and moon.
The sun was loved, loud, and charming. The moon was distant, calm, and quiet.
How could such differences be cast aside in the name of compassion or invention?
Viktor shook his head, eyes drifting from the window and back to his notes. It was wishful thinking at best, day-dreaming at worst, what he was doing. The.....feelings he held for Jayce needed to be covered and silent. The man had his sunlight already in the form of the Counsellor Mel. She was bright, brillant and beautiful. She was worthy of Jayce.
Viktor was not.
"Viktor?"
Speak of the devil, Viktor sighed as Jayce entered the lab, hands busy carrying two cups of tea.
"One spoon of honey," Jayce announced, sliding a cup over to Viktor, "And before you try to tell me you don't like sweetened tea, don't think I don't see how you're face scrunches up whenever you have to drink it plain."
"I was simply going to thank you," Viktor huffed, relaxing as the warm cup helped to ease the tension his his hands. Jayce rolled his eyes lightly. "I'm sure you were," he teased before taking a sip of his own tea.
They sat in silence for a few minutes, nothing but the sounds of tea being drunk echoing around the room. Eventually though, Viktor set his cup down in favor of reaching for his notes. Which is, of course, when a hard cough seized him and sent him curling in on himself.
"Viktor," Jayce whispered, tea cup crashing to the ground as he ran over to his partner, arms hovering around the man's body as the cough faded. A small stream of blood was trickling down Viktor's chin now, and Jayce quickly pulled a handkerchief from his pocket to wipe it away. Rather than smack him with his cane as usual, Viktor merely murmured a complaint half-heartedly and let Jayce gently tug his chin towards him.
"It's getting worse," Jayce said softly and Viktor nodded, eyes glossy and cheeks slightly flushed.
"We knew it would," Viktor muttered, "It was simply a matter of time. And mine is....limited."
"Don't," Jayce said sharply, "Don't say that. Don't you dare give up on me now Viktor. We are going to heal you."
"Jayce," Viktor said softly, one hand reaching over to rest on his shoulder, "There will come a time....when you must let me go."
"Let you go?" Jayce asked, appalled, "Viktor, there is nothing in the world that could make me let you go. Not Hextech, not the Undercity, not the Counsel, not anything."
He slowly reached over, his hands cupping Viktor's pale and hallow cheeks tenderly.
"You," Jayce whispered, "Viktor, you.....I....we......"
Viktor's eyes softened, and he placed a hand over Jayce's.
"There will still be a future for you, outside of me," he said quietly, "You will still be a scientist, a counsellor, and a good man, without me here. And someday, you can have a family and a partner that loves you as I-"
Viktor froze, unaware of how a confession of the love he held so closely for Jayce had nearly slipped out unintentionally.
Jayce didn't notice the hesitant words, too far gone in Viktor's eyes.
"There is no future worth fighting for," Jayce murmured, "If you aren't there to enjoy it with me."
"Jayce," Viktor breathed, eyes widening.
"Please," Jayce asked, "Please....just let me pretend that future is real. Just for tonight."
So Viktor did. He let Jayce hold him and whisper to him. He let Jayce fall asleep in his arms and he indulged himself by letting his fingers run through the surprisingly smooth hair on Jayce's head. He let himself dream of a future that could never be.
One of a family and a home. A life together with Jayce outside the science and the politics.
Viktor let himself fall asleep that night, dreaming of a reality were the sun and moon could love freely, with no consequence to it all and no concepts like time to limit them.
It was a good dream.