Silent Suffering

Spells

'Thoughts'

::Parseltongue::

::Parseltongue Spell::

Dumbledore's eyes were twinkling maniacally before he finally spoke, "Harry, my boy, I'm afraid I am going to have to insist that you return to the Dursleys for the last week before Hogwarts starts again."

Harry's head shot up to look at Dumbledore. 'Oh Merlin,' he thought, 'Dumbledore has lost his fucking mind. Honestly and truly gone insane!' He could not believe what had just come out of the headmaster's mouth. He had spent the entire summer with those people in order to spend his designated two weeks at Grimmauld. It didn't matter that Dumbledore didn't know that Harry was technically an adult, there was no way that man was getting him back into the Dursley household. Harry didn't want to yell or have a conflict with the headmaster, but inside he was raging. Grimmauld was safer than the Dursley's anyways, with all of the ancient Black wards.

Harry gathered up all his patience and spoke calmly, refusing to look the headmaster in the eyes, "Why on Earth would I have to return to the Dursleys, sir? You told me that I could remain here with Sirius and Remus for the last two weeks before I had to return to Hogwarts. No offense, Headmaster, but there is no way I am going back there anytime soon."

Dumbledore spoke his next words condescendingly and slightly disappointed, "Harry, my boy, you must understand that it is not safe here. I fear that Voldemort may be close to finding this place, and if he is, then it won't be long until he finds a way to get in. Even though this place is under the Fidelius, there are people who still know where it is. Bellatrix Lestrange and Narcissa Malfoy are two of those people. They have Black blood and have been to this house before. What will happen if they come and bring others? Are you willing to risk the lives of yourself and your friends? They will kill any who gets in their way, my boy. By staying here, you will be putting Sirius, Remus, all the Weasleys, and Ms. Granger in extreme peril. Are you willing to risk their lives for a week of their company? Especially after last year, where you almost got Sirius and a group of your friends killed by Death Eaters in the Department of Mysteries?"

The more Dumbledore spoke, the angrier Harry got. But, the words also settled heavily in his heart. He never thought about the fact that anyone else with Black blood could enter the home. And he knew that if they thought he was there, then there would be no qualms about burning the house to the ground with all the inhabitants still inside. There was something in his head urging him to go to the Dursleys for the week. It was only one week and he didn't want to be responsible for any of those people's deaths.

Harry tried to think rapidly of a way keep the Dursleys at bay for a week, but then realized that he would have his magic! He could deal with them if they got out of hand.

Harry looked back to his hands and played with a string that was sticking out of the chair, wanting Dumbledore to think that he had won. Harry spoke quietly and timidly, "Of course, sir. You are right. I couldn't possibly endanger all of these people, and I can deal with spending a week at the Dursleys. When do I have to go back?"

Harry looked up in time to see the maniacal twinkle in the headmaster's eyes and got a little concerned as it did not bode well. Harry had a feeling he may have gotten himself into more trouble than he quite realized.

Dumbledore smiled at him and gleefully responded, "So glad you could see sense, my boy. You leave in two days, at night so that there will be less of a chance to be seen. Remus and the eldest Weasley will bring you there."

"Of course, sir," Harry said and stood up to walk back to the kitchen. He heard Dumbledore stand up and leave through the floo, but couldn't bring himself to care that much. Harry was extremely nervous about having Remus bring him to the Dursley household when it was so close to the full moon. There would only be another 4 days, and his senses would be hypersensitive as Moony rises to the surface. How was he supposed to tell everyone?

Harry wandered back into the kitchen and sat down in his chair, dreading spending the next week with the Dursleys. He didn't notice everybody's nervous glances at his blank expression. He picked up his previously discarded apple and continued to eat it.

Little conversations were made as Harry finished his apple. Sirius waited until Harry finished eating to ask him, "So pup, what did Dumbledore want to discuss with you?" Sirius tried to ask nonchalantly, but everyone in the room could hear how tense he sounded.

Harry's eyes widened and he stared at his plate before stuttering out his response, "He- uh- the Headmaster just.. he wanted to- um ahh- di-dis-discuss some..uhh... living arrangements."

Sirius' froze with his cup halfway to his mouth and just stared at Harry. Everyone else seemed to have a similar reaction. The twins were the first ones to speak, sounding uncharacteristically serious.

"What do you mean-"

"Living arrangements-"

"Harrykins?"

"You're living here," they finished together.

He knew this was going to be difficult, but Harry didn't realize just how hard it would be.

He took a calming breath and let out a steady stream, just hoping to get it all out, "Dumbledore wants me to go back to the Dursley's for the last week of vacation. There are security flaws here that could get all of you hurt if anyone was to consider me being here. Dumbledore says that it will be safer at their house because of the blood wards. It's only a week. He said that Remus and Bill can drop me off at the Dursley's in two days time sometime after dark."

Everyone was silent for almost a second before Hermione shattered the glass in her hand. She spoke in a quiet and threatening tone, "How. Dare. He. How dare that man waltz in here and tell you what to do? How DARE HE make you go back to that house! They aren't even BLOOD RELATIVES," as she spoke her voice rose in volume and pitch until she was screaming, "There is NO protection there, Harry! That man is trying to get you killed and you know it! We may as well hand you over to You-Know-Who! At least HE would probably be more hospitable than those ANIMALS. There is no way in all of hell that I am allowing you to return there. Only over my dead body!"

Harry shrunk down into his seat, wishing he could disappear from all of the questioning and concerned glances. Hermione just said a bunch of things that he certainly did not want to address with anyone at this time, but knew something had to be done.

He stood up and vanished the shattered cup with a wave of his hand. His next words were quiet, but forceful, "Hermione, stop. This is my decision. I will speak with all of you, but I can't do it in a large group like this. Especially as some of you are more explosive than the others," Harry stared pointedly at Sirius and Hermione, "Sirius, Hermione, and the twins can all go wait in the sitting room. I'll talk about this first with Remus, Bill, and Charlie as they seem to be much more calm about this."

Sirius looked like he was about to fight him on this so he looked desperately at the twins to help him before Siri made it any worse. They each stood up and almost dragged the other two out of the Kitchen.

As soon as they exited Harry dropped his head onto the table. Why he could never just have a normal life was beyond him. He felt as Remus and Bill moved to the seats across from him as Charlie took the one on his left. He gave a slight wave of his hand and put up silencing charms to keep the others from hearing him.

Charlie moved his hand to rub circles on Harry's back as he spoke, "Come on little brother. We may be more patient, but we are all quite hot-headed too. You know you'll have to explain it all to us eventually, so why not now? And what is so wrong with the Dursley's that Hermione seemed ready to tear them apart?"

Harry knew he would have to tell them about everything that happened sooner or later, but there was no way he could deal with it at the moment so he went for a light version.

Harry picked his head up and began to speak, "Hermione was just overreacting. The Dursley's were never that fun to live at, I had an extreme amount of chores and there wasn't a lot of love in the household for magic so they didn't really like me, but it doesn't matter now. I only have to spend a week there. There may not be blood wards there, but I know there are other protective wards. Plus, none of the Death Eaters or Voldemort even know that there aren't blood wards now, nor have there ever been any. You guys can't change my mind because I am unwilling to let anything happen to any of you. You're all my family and I love you guys."

Remus was the one to respond, "Listen, cub, we respect your decision and know that there is nothing that we can do to change your mind. But remember this, we would do anything to protect you. Just have fun trying to convince Siri to let you go. He loves you, and just misses you a lot so go easy on him."

Harry nodded and stood up to walk into the sitting room to find the others. He spoke before leaving, "Thank you guys, I really appreciate it. I love you all." With that, Harry left and walked towards the others, mindlessly disabling the silencing charms he put around the kitchen.

Uneasily, Harry made his way to the sitting room that he knew they would all be at, and stood just outside the door.

He could feel the tension and anxiety of the people in the room prickling against his skin and wondered how that was possible before dismissing the feeling to the back of his mind to deal with later. Harry took a deep breath and entered the room. Fred and George, Sirius, and Hermione were all sitting around in chairs or on the sofa. No one spoke as Harry walked in and paced in front of the fireplace.

Sirius was the first one to speak up after he had enough of the silence, his voice laced with a protective edge,"There is no way you are going back to the Dursleys, pup. I just got you, there is no reason for you not to spend the last week with us before you go to Hogwarts. Unless you can tell me under Veritaserum that you will be absolutely safe there and I have no reason to worry, I am not allowing you to go back there." Sirius' expression told Harry that he knew that there was no way that those words would ever come out of his mouth under the influence of the truth serum.

Harry ran his hand through his galmoured hair and sighed, "Listen, Sirius, it is only going to be a week. And in case any of you forgot, I am technically an adult. I will be able to use magic at their house if anything gets out of hand. There is no reason for you guys to be so nervous. And Voldemort doesn't know I'm lacking blood wards, so he still will leave the place alone. There is no way that I can risk any harm coming to you guys so you can't change my mind. I leave in two days with Remus and Bill. I love you guys, but I don't know what I would do if any of you died."

Hermione was the one to speak up next, "Harry, we just care about you. That household is toxic for you to be in and you spent almost all of the summer there anyways. The Dursleys are-"

Harry cut her off quickly, "None of your business. I know you guys care, but it doesn't matter at the moment. I will not risk your lives again." With that, Harry got up and stormed out of the room. He didn't realize where he was going gone until he was standing in the middle of the Black Library. He walked towards the table that held his books and saw Kreacher skulking up one of the rows. Harry knew the elf hated all of them, but he figured that he should still be nice because Grimmauld was his home for much longer than they had been there.

"Hello Kreacher," he said as he settled himself into a plush chair to read up on Dark Fae.

The elf looked up at him in surprise, obviously surprised that Harry was polite. "Hello, young Master Black. Is there anything Kreacher can be doing for young master?" the elf said cautiously.

Harry's head shot up in surprise. He had not expected that all. Not only was Kreacher being nice, but he was offering him help. "Umm, no thank you Kreacher, I have everything I need as of right now. If I may ask, why are you calling me young Master Black? And why be polite to me, but not to Sirius who you have known for his whole life?" Harry knew he was taking a chance, but the elf had been nicer to him in the past couple days than to anyone else he had ever seen.

The elf spoke as if it was the simplest thing in the world, "Young Master be being kind to Kreacher and has noble Black blood running strong and pure through his veins. There is no taint in Young Master. Kreacher be being rude to filthy blood-traitor mutt because he be suppressing himself and his family magic. He has turned his back on his blood and magic, that nots be being the noble Black way. Master Blood-Traitor be hating Kreacher because Kreacher knows hes be better than that. Yous be calling Kreacher if yous be needing anything young Master Black. Yous will restore Most Noble and Ancient House of Black. Good day, young Master."

The elf popped out of the room, and Harry could not have been more surprised. How was Sirius suppressing himself and how was he supposed to restore the Black name? He decided that it would be a worry for another time and focused on the books in front of him. He picked up Dark Creatures: The Truth Instead of the Myths. He leafed through to the chapter labeled Dark Fae, and found the section referring to their abilities and read:

Dark Fae are similar to Light fae in which both have similar abilities and powers, but the differ in the case that Dark Fae are inherently more powerful than their light counterparts. This is one of the reasons that they have been labeled as Dark Creatures by the Ministry of Magic and are closely regulated.

Dark Fae have been known to have the ability to predict the future or give warnings, whether it be through tea leaves, reading the stars, or premonitions. They have the natural ability to use glamours to protect themselves from those that hunt them, or wish to harm them in anyways. The glamours are difficult to detect and are nearly impossible for anyone who is not a creature to detect. Dark Fae have the capability of controlling, at least, one element, but many can control more than that. It is also believed by many that they have the ability to glow and become luminescent, whether it is controlled or conditionally is unknown.

Harry tried to continue reading, but he couldn't get his mind to focus on the book. He kept drifting off into thoughts about the Dursleys. Hypothetically, he knew that he would be able to legally defend himself there, but after 16 years of abuse in that house, he was conditioned to submit and take it from them. Not fight back.

Harry's inner creature snarled at the thought of submitting to the Dursleys. The only person he would ever submit to would be his mate. At the thought of his mate, Harry realized he should probably read that portion of the book, but since he was unlikely to keep focused on it, decided that he would do it later.

He cast a tempus to see that it was 11:30 and made his way downstairs to the kitchen to make lunch for everyone. He figured that even if he wasn't hungry, everyone else would be.

Once Harry had finished it was only 12:15 and the table was filled with Cheeseburgers, Pasta Salad, Grilled Cheeses, and a couple of types of chips. Knowing that everyone would come down in a few minutes, Harry made his way to his room after casting a heating charm on the sandwiches and a cooling charm on the pasta salad.

He knew that avoiding the situation and the people would not fix his problem, but he couldn't find the energy within himself to actually face them. They were making it harder on him than necessary. Did they think that he wanted to go back to the place where he has so many painful and hurtful memories instead of staying with them?

Harry sighed. He knew he wouldn't be able to get to sleep without having nightmares and decided he would just take some Dreamless sleep and nap until someone decided he was needed. He opened the drawer in the table next to his bed and pulled out the potion. Harry downed the draught and placed the empty vial before falling into a deep sleep, oblivious to the concerns of the people below.