Black Memories

The boy’s were on the train. Remus and James were playing chess. Peter was organizing his cards while Sirius was reading. James threw him a glance and rolled his eyes.

“Hey, Sirius!”

The boy looked up.

“Come here and talk to us. Someone could start thinking that you and Remus have somehow changed bodies.”

Sirius rolled his eyes and turned his face towards the window. The snow outside was thick and the weather looked as if it would only get worse. They were on their way home. And he wasn’t happy. He knew that he would have to face his parents. James, almost as if he read his mind, smiled softly.

“Will it be that bad?”

Sirius shrugged.

“Not sure. But I went against his direct orders. He won’t go easy on me. That much I know.”

James frowned.

“Can’t you just ask if you could come spend the Christmas at my place? I’m sure my parents won’t have anything against it.”

Black looked at him with disbelief.

“Are you completely mad, Potter? My father will kill me if I ask about something like that.”

They quieted again and, after a few minutes, went back to what they were doing before. Half an hour later, Remus stood up.

“We should most probably change our clothes. I think we’ll be there soon.”

Everyone nodded in agreement. Quickly they all changed. Remus put on jeans and a too big, thick sweater. James had jeans and t-shirt. On the seat next to him laid a thick winter jacket. Peter wore jeans and a hoodie. Even he had a jacket on the seat next to him. Sirius looked at them and then at his own clothes. He wore black pants, a green shirt and a black cloak over it. He sat down on his seat and picked the book up again. Remus tilted his head a bit to see the front of it. His eyes widened when he noticed what was written on it.

“Sirius.”

The boy made a sound to show that he was listening.

“Um… Is that a fourth year book?”

Sirius looked up at him, closed his book and read the title. Then he read it again.

“Yeah. Why?”

Remus’ eyes widened even more.

“But… Why?”

Sirius shrugged.

“Father wants me to be on top of the class. What better way than to get through all the books up to seventh year?”

By now, everyone was staring at him. Remus pulled a book out of his bag and stretched it out to Sirius.

“Can you read this?”

Sirius grabbed it and opened on the first side. He let his eyes fly over the lines for a moment before he nodded.

“Yeah. Although I’m wondering why you would read a book about how to tame trolls. In latin.”

Remus giggled.

“So that’s what it is about.”

Sirius frowned.

“Wait. You didn’t know?”

The young werewolf shook his head.

“No. My mom knows that I love to read so, when we went to the Diagon Alley, she went to a second hand store and bought this for me. She, of course, didn’t know what it was about either. Trolls, you say?”

Sirius nodded. He gently flipped a few sides and his expression got cold.

“You know what? You should throw this away.”

Peter tilted his head.

“Why should Remus throw it away? You said it was about trolls. What could be wrong about that?”

For a long moment it was quiet. Sirius kept flipping a few pages at the same time and reading small snippets from each of the sides. His expression got more and more dangerous. In the end, he gently closed the book.

“This is a dark book, Remus. It doesn’t only talk about taming trolls. It talks about taming all magical creatures. Hippogriffs. Fairies. Acromantulas.”

James’ eyes widened with fear.

“But… They are dangerous.”

Sirius nodded.

“Exactly. Every chapter here seems to follow the same model. First you have a few actually smart ideas about how you could try to tame them. But then it changes into things that you don’t want to go near. Dark, ancient magic. Torture methods. The most common advice seems to be…”

He opened the book and flipped to the right page.

“Here it is. ‘The more pain you cause it, the more you’ll break it. And the more you break it, the bigger chance that you will tame it.’ And every chapter ends with the same thing. ‘If you can’t break it, just kill it.’”

The book was closed again and Sirius looked up at the terrified faces of his three friends. He made a move to hand the book back to Remus, but the boy quickly moved away.

“No. I don’t want it.”

Sirius looked down at the book. Then he grabbed his own bag and dropped the book into it.

“I’ll leave it somewhere in the library at home. I doubt anyone will notice. Not with the amount of dark books we have there. I’ll just have to make sure to put it high enough so that Reg can’t reach it.”

James frowned.

“Reg?”

For a moment, Sirius just stared at him. Then he suddenly realized what was going on.

“Oh. I never told you. I have a younger brother. Regulus. He is one year younger than us.”

Peter looked at him in concern.

“Do your fa… Do they have to… Discipline him?”

Sirius barked out a laugh.

“You mean if father ever hit him? No. Merlin, no. Reg is mother’s favorite. If either father or grandfather touched him, she would curse them for the rest of their life. Maybe even kill them. And, to be honest, that’s the only thing me and mother seem to agree on. Neither of us will ever let anyone hurt Reg. That’s just how it is.”

Before anyone could answer, the train slowed down. Sirius quickly put his own book in the bag and grabbed his trunk. Seeing that, James did the same.

“Come on, guys. If we wait at the doors, we’ll be out quicker.”

The other two followed them and, very real, they managed to get off the train first. Grins appeared on their faces when they noticed that Remus’ mother, Peter’s parents and Dorea and Henry Potter stood together. The boys went over there and Sirius looked how his friends were drawn into hugs from their parents. After letting go of her son, Dorea turned to Sirius. She smiled widely.

“Hallo, Sirius. How are you?”

Sirius smiled back carefully.

“I’m fine. Thank you, Mrs Potter.”

Then he glanced around and, not seeing his parents anywhere, took a step towards her and said quietly:

“I wanted to apologize, Mrs Potter. For that night. For calling you a blood traitor.”

Dorea just smiled and drew him into a hug.

“It’s alright Sirius. I’m not mad at you. I know how life in that house can be.”

Then she took a step away from him and crouched down to be at the same level as him.

“Remember Sirius, your family don’t have to define you. Even though you are a Black, you don’t need to be like your father. Be yourself.”

Sirius looked at her with wide eyes. Before he managed to say anything, Dorea stood up and put her arm around James’ shoulders. The messy haired boy smiled widely towards his friends.

“Hey, guys. Do you want to come over during the break? You could floo home to me.”

Peter glanced over to his parents. His mother nodded and he smiled widely towards James.

“Sure. Just send me an owl when I can come over.”

Meanwhile Remus and his mother had exchanged a look. Then he smiled and turned back to James.

“Sure. Just send an owl.”

James turned to Sirius.

“And you?”

The boy sighed.

“I would love to. But I’m not sure my father will allow me.”

Then he spotted said man in the crowd and took a deep breath.

“I’ll see you in Hogwarts.”

Then he turned around and quickly left. Orion was standing in the middle of the crowd, but no one dared to go too close to him. When Sirius reached him, he was met by a hard stare.

“May I ask why you were with those people?”

Sirius paled. He knew he was in deep trouble.

The clip ended and Snape turned to Sirius.

“How bad was it?”

Sirius immediately understood what he meant.

“The belt. He went pretty easy on me that time. Most probably because he knew that grandfather was coming home to us a few days later.”

Arthur frowned.

“And what did he do? Since you were so scared of him when you were younger.”

Everyone noticed how Sirius paled and his breathing quickened. Orion smirked from his portrait.

“Look how low the mighty Black has fallen.”

Sirius eyes snapped open and he glared over to his father.

“No. Not anymore.”

Then he turned back to the others.

“Grandfather caned me. So hard that he almost broke my spine once. Only aunt Druella’s skillfulness in healing saved me that time.”

And suddenly Remus eyes widened.

“Regulus.”

Sirius flinched but, before he could say anything, Remus continued.

“He never touched Regulus because you always took the blame. You always stepped in front of him.”

Sirius nodded slowly.

“Yeah. I couldn’t let Reg get hurt like that. But why do you bring it up now?”

Remus took a deep breath and turned to McGonagall.

“Minerva. Do you remember what Sirius always did when we all got caught? Every single time.”

The woman frowned, trying to remember. Then her eyes widened just as Remus’ had done.

“He stepped in front of the rest of you.”

She quickly turned to Sirius.

“You thought that we would…? The teachers?”

Sirius shook his head.

“No! No. I… To be honest, I never noticed doing that. It was an instinct. We were in trouble. I had to protect them.”

That was when Hermione got an idea.

“Sirius?”

He turned towards her.

“Is your grandfather’s portrait in this house?”

Sirius nodded after a few seconds of hesitation.

“Yes. I put him in the basement. Thought he would appreciate it.”

Orion snorted.

“I can assure you that he appreciates it. Especially appreciates the fact that he doesn’t have to see the… people, you bring into this house.”

Sirius rolled his eyes.

“I’m sure about that.”

Then he turned to Remus.

“Next one, Moony?”

The man nodded and the next clip started.