Wear black clothes, for the current and the up coming funerals
Tricky conversations/Nxdia
3 months and 15 days ago
Abby had been eyeing her, for the past 5 days, since ellie had arrived
She had green eyes, ginger hair, freckles, hands that she would love to place under her thighs to keep them warm, a nose that would be red in the cold so quickly, and a personality of an introvert
She had asked about introverts of her therapist in the session she had a few hours ago
"Oh? It's a friend of yours? The introvert I mean" her therapist had asked
Abby had nodded
"Well..those people are like onions, layer by layer, it takes a lot of time to get to know them fully, they don't easily open up, and they are interesting people, not much to hide but they still look mysterious"
Ellie did look mysterious, though, she and those notebook of hers that she always seemed so into putting all her attention on it, but abby did notice the few seconds that ellie would look up, she took a few rounds of look around the place, and then settled her eyes back on her notebook
Abby had caught her eyes staring a few times, she wanted to smirk though, but she stayed poker face, abby wouldn't scare her away
"I usually let her stare...I like it when she does it" she had answered to her therapists question
And it was no lie
To know that you have a pretty girls eyes on yourself, and not just anyone, a green eyed girl
Green was her favourite...not in colour...but in taste
"Colors are what you see abby, they are not tastes"
"Who says that?"
"Everyone"
"See, that's the problem you people have going on, doctor" she moves in her chair, looking directly to the woman in front of her "you guys think just because everyone think one thing is right, then it truly is, but haven't you thought that maybe all these people are wrong? By any chance?"
"Like how right they all were in the court when they saw the evidence of you killing your boyfriend? With stabbing him 56 times?"
Bitches do still exist, that's what abby figured out before smiling "didn't know that you had memorised the number though" doctors eyes follow abby's movements when she gets up "how many times would you like me to stab you? Think you can keep up counting and memorising that?"
The therapist does nothing other than looking up when abby stands one inch away from her chair and titles her chin upwards
"It depends on my mood...you're going to do it now?"
"Would you like me to do it now?" Abby whispers, her breath hits the doctors face
She nods "I wanna see you try, abby" and she closes the space between them
She tastes the blonde girls lips, she backs off when abby doesn't kiss her back "what's wrong?"
"You're not fun to fuck anymore, Maggie" she murmurs
"I thought you liked me"
"I was just bored, and you were too, of your husband cause he has such a boring personality with stupid jokes and is the worst in the bed"
"And who has your attention now?"
"None of your business" she turns and walks towards the door
"I will see you for the next session?"
"No"
Everyone had told her that she had a loyal character all the time, at least when she had found someone who she was interestedin no matter if the interestwas both sided or not, that she would never be the one who cheats in a relationship, or that she would be those type of mom's who would not be ok with her child fucking another person other than their partner
Abby didn't really give a shit about kids, she never wanted to have one and she knew that she wasn't going to
Not when she had been not able to the kid that had called her "older sister", not when she had fucked up a kids life up with just giving her a piece of advice
Not when Lev had done abby had told him, "I wanted to runaway from everything and everyone when I was your age" that was what he had heard from abby and he had done it, he had ran away but he was stopped and killed while doing it
"Pathetic" abby shakes her head, goes to her cell but faces an empty one "where's my stuff?" She turned to the gaurd standing nearby
"You're moved to a cube, Anderson, your stuff is there"
---
Present
The funeral was quite
Joel wasn't crying, not on the outside at least
Tommy stood by Joel's side all the time, saying a few scentces here and there
Tess was there with ellie, ellie was grateful of her, mostly when she just hugged ellie in the second that she got of her car and arrived at the funeral, not that tess was late..no, she was on time, ellie and Joel were just too early
Ellie had followed the steps of the blonde that she knew until they were alone
"You have to appear now? Couldn't you do it sooner? Huh?"
Ellie's yell fills the place
Abby takes a step closer to her, cupping her cheeks "I told you to wait on me-"
"I couldn't, abby, don't you understand?, I couldn't trust you with closed eyes until you came back to me again"
"Then why did you do it when I was taking both of us out of the hospital?"
"Both?" She laughs, like abby had just said the funniest joke, "both of us? No no no, no you didn't, I could leave whenever I wanted, I was there for YOU, until you bitch decided to runaway from the mess that you have created in the damn place" she pushes abby by hitting her fists on her chest, abby lets her "you- it was all because of you- all of it-"
Ellie was right, abby knew it, the girl had almost sacrificed her life for her, like life was a gamble and ellie took the risk no matter the cost, all for abby
Abby had never been that special to anyone, she had never had anyone obsessed over her, maybe own, but he was left in the past, abby had made sure of that
And Owen was in love, not obsessed
The love that you can easily forget when you see a hot girl in a club wearing almost nothing, the love that abby couldn't even count as a feeling
Love was a home wrecker, that was what abby had lurned from her father, "they leave...the people who are in love, they always leave you alone, abby, don't ever get fooled by them" he had said and abby had noted that in mind since ; Like a student, who wanted to be a life winner and not a doctor to stitch the wounds that people had left on her
"You won't need to take care of yourself until someone dares to tell you that you worth a kiss followed by love" abby had written that in her diary right after her father had said it
Her father who would always avoid making any mistakes so he wouldn't have to solve anything
Abby would be left without food for a few days or a week if she did make any mistakes in her childhood
But that eventually stopped when abby got older and older by each passing day
She learned to stand up for herself, to defend herself, that was what led to her killing Owen
She was only standing up for herself like how her father had taught her by giving advice and pushing while being let down by abby, and he was proud of her when he found it out
Why wouldn't he be?
"You being blind isn't my fault, ellie" abby whispers "maybe she just deserved to die by your hands" she looks deep into ellie's eyes, her cheeks feels cold against abby's hand, she doesn't mind though
"You're a monster" Ellie murmurs, the look she is giving ellie is the one just like the first sight abby saw of her, ready to snap but blinded by the blue eyes
"I have been told" she places a kiss on her forehead " but thought you had a different way of seeing me, sweetheart"
After a year being in the mental hospital she slowly lost her mind, she couldn't remember how many days she was in there and how many days were left, maybe because the judge never decided to give her a day out
Her lawyer had told her that she wouldn't be kept there forever, but of course, she wouldn't get out in a week or a year
So she waited, until ellie arrived, and that was when she knew she could count down the days left, it all started with 3 months and 20 days, or 110 days, or 6600 hours, or-
"I do" Ellie let's herself relax in abby's arms, with her cheek resting on her shoulder, ellie breaths abby's air in "and that's my down hill"
"Care to explain?"
"I dont know abby...I just love you" she looks away from her eyes, blinks a few times before facing abby again "that's enough for you?" Her tone low and soft
"It's more than enough"
"Care to explain?" She repeats abby's question, it makes abby huff out a laugh
"I always felt good around people just because I could fuck them, but you showed up and made all of those people look like garbage, like..even if I don't get to fuck you...that would be ok"
Ellie raises her eyebrows "Didn't like that"
Abby places her plams are either side off ellie's jaw, her thumbs caressing the soft sking on her face "just looking at you is enough, then imagine what more than that would be for me, ellie dear"
"Enough for you to love me?"
"Enough for me to burn down the world for you, and more than enough for me to love every inch of you" and with that she pulls her into a kiss
Ellie doesn't pull away, not when she was waiting for this moment all her life
---
3 months and 15 days ago
"I have seen you before"
The girl raises her head and eyes away from her sketch book "good for you?"
Abby sits on the empty bed in the cube "good for me, honor me with your name?"
"Ellie"
"Abby" She reaches her hand out from where she is sat down "You're new, aren't you?"
Ellie's eyes darts between abby's and her hand that us stretched for ellie to shake
She had never been interested with physical touch, she had a lot of people, or friends who wanted to give her their first hug to her on the last day of the school in a few years ago, she had rejected their offer politely or not, and had walked home with a wave of her hand
Dina had been the first girl- the first person in the world out of the home and the family who ellie wanted to hug so badly, or just brush a finger against her hand while handing her the eraser that dina had dropped accidentally on the floor
And Dina had not rejected her when she had hugged her so tightly before going on the winter break, which ellie wouldn't be ashamed of if she did reject her hug, at least she would know how dina smelled like when they were so close
𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘴𝘩𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘪𝘵, 𝘴𝘵𝘶𝘱𝘪𝘥
Ellie doesn't "yeah, you're not I guess"
"Yeah, you're not I guess" what was ellie had also said to dina when the dark haired girl had kissed her and had asked ellie if she was gay
Ellie had say yes and dina had just nodded
Ellie had been that type of girl who dina would kiss to get her ex boyfriend or her current boyfriend jealous in the first year of high school, then later, after her break up with the boy named jesse, she had stayed single for a while which was so unlikely of her
Ellie had asked her why and she had said that "I'm tired of trying to find the right person"
And a few weeks after that dina had told her that she loved her, ellie did not hesitate to take her out on the evening of that day for a date
Abby rolls her eyes, lays down on the matters "a year"
"It's hard?"
"No, not when you have already lost your mind"
"But you haven't, so it's not hard"
"How do you know?"
"You sound normal"
𝘌𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘴𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘳𝘮𝘢𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘴𝘦 𝘥𝘢𝘺𝘴, 𝘦𝘭𝘭𝘴, 𝘶𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘭 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘺𝘳𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧 𝘵𝘪𝘦𝘥 𝘶𝘱 𝘵𝘰 𝘢 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘪𝘳 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘰𝘯 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘰𝘯 𝘢 𝘥𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩
"And you don't"
"Why not?"
"Normal people are locked up here, who don't need to pretend to be someone else, ellie, but people out there? Those are the crazy ones" she huffe sout a laugh, her hand opening the tight braid of her hair" the ones who mask up and act like they are tough" she points at ellie "and you're one of them, i can tell that you don't belong here"
𝘚𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘦𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘺𝘰𝘶, 𝘩𝘰𝘯𝘦𝘺, 𝘐𝘮 𝘨𝘭𝘢𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘐𝘮 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘢𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦
"See? Silence is the answer"
"Who told you that? The four walls of your cell?"
"I would laugh if you said it With the right tone"
"It sounded like the right tone to me"
she places her sketch book on the side, brushing a strand of her behind her ear, and decides to stay silent and watch abby taking out her eye lens
"Poor sight eye?"
"Colorblind"
𝘋𝘪𝘯𝘢'𝘴 𝘥𝘰𝘨 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘰𝘰, 𝘸𝘢𝘴𝘯𝘵 𝘴𝘩𝘦?
"Didn't know they would let people wear lens in here"
𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘣𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘴𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘱𝘰𝘰𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘯 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘣𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘣𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘦𝘦 𝘪𝘵𝘴 𝘤𝘰𝘭𝘰𝘶𝘳?
Dina used to have a dog named Alice, a tiny little dog who was really interested in ellie until she had found the drug that ellie was supposed to keep in her pocket and had torn its plastic and licked it
The dog had tried to bite dina's leg which was faced with a push towards the edge of the pool that was placed in the yard
And had fallen in the water
Ellie had gotten close to the pool to get the dog out of the water before she drowned in it, but was faced with a bite on her forearm that was now covered with a tattoo
And before she could try to grab the dog again, the dog, Alice was shot in the leg, by jesse, who had dropped the gun instantly and went to help ellie and stop the bleeding
𝘗𝘰𝘰𝘳 𝘥𝘰𝘨, 𝘴𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘴𝘰 𝘶𝘨𝘭𝘺
"Why wouldn't they? When they already let people wear glasses" abby looks at her, poker faced "you can harm others with a glass, but not with lens, now can you?"
"𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘴 is what you call normal? Talking back and throwing a tantrum over nothing?"
"Just because my words were correct doesn't mean that it was talking back, I was just trying to have a conversation with you"
"Why with me? You have no friends over here?"
"Well you're the one who I will share this cube with, I feel like that we need to talk to each other unless you want both of us to go insane while acting like we are in cells where we can have no connection to other people"
"You could just say that you have no friends"
"Guess so"
And that was the end of that conversation for an entire week of being in the cube together, abby didn't want to push the girl further, ellie was glad
So they just simply stayed quiet, both of the waiting for ellie to give abby a thumps up sign so abby would start talking again without making the girl uncomfortable
The day after that also went quietly, with a few small talks here and there, "is it hard? Not being able to see the colours?"Ellie had asked
"It's not, but it's better when you have something to see the colours through it"
"I dont think I could ever wear lens"
"Why not?"
"I always think that I can't take them off"
"Cause you'll like them?"
"No, cause they won't come out of my eyes when I try to get them out"
Or the other conversation that abby liked a lot
"Do you ever miss people? Who you knew before ending up here"
"No, it was only my dad who died cause of a heart attack, and I killed my boyfriend which made me end up in here, so there is no-oneleft to care about"
"Then it was more than just a killing that got you locked up in here"
"Stabbing" abby had shook her head in disappointment "a few times, that was unfair"
"How many times?"
"I dont know, 57 or something like that"
Ellie had huffed and turned silent before saying "they might have had saw something in you that put you in here"
"Like what?"
"I dont know"
And the conversation that ellie hated it
"Did you..by any chance, knew anything about the boy named Lev?"
"Why do you ask?"
"Curiosity"
"Here isn't a place for curiosity"
"A girl told me that I should stick to it" abby rolls her eyes when she sees the questioning look that abby has "Nora, was that girls name"
"Then let me tell you something, nora is stupid"
"And I'm not, do you know anything about the boy?"
"I do...but I can't find any reasons to convince myself to tell you" abby takes her shirt off "why did you ask me though? You have no other friends in here to ask them about it?"
"I do" Ellie had lied, "but they haven't been here as long as you have, so"
Abby had chuckled
And that chuckle and the sound of it had made ellie blush, she didn't mind it though
---
Present
"Fucking search through the evidence then, the guy was literally in the goddamm house! And you tell me that you can't find one fingerprint of him?"
Ellie breaths loudly, her throat hurts from yelling
"Ellie, I know that you're disappointed-"
"Oh you fucker I'm more than just disappointed-"
"-but all we have found was Sarah's fingerprints in the place, I am so sorry but me and my team tried to do our bests for you and mister miller" the woman says without paying any attention to ellie snapping out
"Well then fuck you and your useless team.." she looks at the woman's name tag and reads "Maria"
She gets out of the office with a turn on her hills, pulls her hair free from the hair tie that had had them in a messy way of a ponytail "I need to cut this shit off"she murmurs while picking the fallen hair tie off of the dirty floor, and she stops and looks at the hair tie that has fallen out of her hand again
She leaves it there we she gets a glance of bill, who is waving his hand towards the door of his office
"So?"
Ellie finds herself in his office a second later
"That was it, she told me that she couldn't help me further even though she had not even helped me with taking one step forward"
"Maria doesn't like getting involved in things that is not a problem for her people" he sighs, leans forward in his chair "she mostly takes risky cases for the family or close friends"
"She is a bitch, then"
Bill nods quickly after, and places a piece of paper in front of ellie "we have had this guy named David on out wanted people's list, but since last year he has been low, until you found him"
"He is wanted for more murders?"
"I have a file of his past, ellie, and none of the people who are known as victims on his file were not died by his hands, he usually likes to put ok traps for people to step on"
"Also a bitch" she murmurs, "had there been any survivors?, or a family member to one of the other victims?"
"One survivor out of 58 victims"
"You..you didn't tell me that there was this amount of murders"
"I did now, and it is a normal number to have here, ellie, he had been doing this since 2008"
𝘐 𝘴𝘶𝘨𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘰 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘢𝘴𝘬 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘯𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘰𝘯𝘭𝘺 𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘤𝘪𝘢𝘭 𝘴𝘶𝘳𝘷𝘪𝘷𝘰𝘳, 𝘣𝘢𝘣𝘦
"What was the name of the-"
"Anderson"
"Anderson what?"
"Abby Gail Anderson, currently 24 years old"
𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘯, 𝘦𝘭𝘭𝘪𝘦, 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳
.
"The fuck, abby?"
She puffs out the cold air, puts her hands in the pockets of her coat "he was my first therapist in the mental hospital" and god how much ellie liked it when she had this coat on
"The details, stupid" she kicks abby's ankle yo get her attention "like, couldn't you tell me that this guy who had kidnapped sarah- was someone you knew? While I told you all the story and how I was just searching everywhere to find a glimpse of him?"
"You didn't ask"
"Oh my god" she laughs, "abby, literally oh my god, you-" with a pointed finger ellie says "-you- I didn't need to ask since you knew it abby i-"
"Isn't your job to find the right people to ask questions of?" Abby looks down at her, and brushes a strand of hair out of ellie's face "I could've told you but in that way...I don't know...you wouldn't be a great detective, hmm?"
"You're such a Gaslighter"she pushes abby's hand away
"Only If you want me to"
"We will go to a coffee shop, cause I won't be standing here freezing, and you?, you'll tell me everything Anderson"
And David laughs to himself while he stand a bit far away from them, watching thier every move like how he had done it with sarah "such a nice...couple you two are" he murmurs before he starts walking behind the two girls "wonder which one of you I will put seven feet under sooner....since the two of you are my favourite"