I love you
Christmas was around the corner, finals ended like a week ago and the roommates were doing their best to coexist in their shared room, ignoring their situation, their misunderstandings, the longing and the guilt they both felt.
They didn't fully ignore each other's existence but their small talks didn't go beyond a question and an answer, they existed in a space full of silence. It was peaceful at times if you don't overthink it but then suddenly it becomes suffocating whenever they remembered the unspoken, unsolved tension hanging in the air of their shared room.
And today wasn't that different from their previous ones but seoyeon noticed something, of course she did, yooyeon was acting strange, in a way seoyeon couldn't explain.
It was like a black rainy cloud was hovering over the girl's head, following her around like a shadow, and seoyeon didn't know why. In their 3 months of knowing each other, 2 of which they spent in awkwardness and misunderstandings, seoyeon never asked about yooyeon's personal life. She pretty much didn't know anything about the other girl but she couldn't shake the uneasy feeling that took over her as she looked at the girl sitting on her desk.
It was the 24th, Christmas night, and even tho seoyeon was excited to spend it with her family, she couldn't, both her parents had to travel out of the country after an emergency call. So, here she was sitting on her bed, scrolling through her phone mindlessly, while in reality she was trying her best to ignore the darkness coming out of her roommate who was laying on her own bed, back turned to seoyeon, staring at the wall.
Then out of nowhere she heard the bed next to her squeak, and then yooyeon was up, jacket in hand, walking to the door.
"I'm going out..." An inhale followed "don't wait up or look for me if it gets late just sleep"
And with that she was out of the door in record speed that seoyeon didn't even have enough time to respond but she knew, she's not sleeping tonight until her roommate was back. Call her selfish and stupid considering she was the reason they both barely talked anymore but she couldn't help but worry. Adding to that, for the past month yooyeon never told her to 'not wait up' it's like she was asking for the complete opposite and seoyeon couldn't ignore it.
Xinyu and sohyun have been getting closer day by day since they went out for drinks that night.
Xinyu still remembers it like it was yesterday, it was 2 weeks ago, and it was the best night she had ever since she set foot in college. Having a pretty woman sitting across from you, who's cheeks kept getting redder by the minute, while you both talked about a lot of nothing for more that 2 hours was a great experience she wanted to go through again.
So, here she was standing in front of the vision club, on Christmas night waiting for the pretty short haired barista. It was like déjà vu when she heard her voice calling.
"Xinyu!"
But this time xinyu wasn't as startled as last time, turning around she saw her, sohyun, walking towards her with an easy smile and okay, xinyu isn't going to describe how good she looked again, that will probably take her hours anyway, but just know that sohyun looked absolutely amazing, in her eyes at least. And with a smile of her own she greeted the other girl.
"Sohyun! Hi!"
When the barista finally stood in front of her, they both stared, mesmerized, Then suddenly after a minute or two of silence sohyun's hands went up to her own neck, taking her own scarf off and fixing it around xinyu's, the taller girl physically melted. At the thoughtful action, at the warmth it brought with it and at sohyun's scent that enveloped her whole.
"There you go silly, it's cold you should've put more clothes on." her eyes spoke so much and xinyu just wanted to dive deep into them like they were an ocean that held all of her answers.
"Let's go?" It was sohyun again because xinyu was currently still day dreaming.
Snapping out of it, she smiled, wider and brighter, compared to the snowy and gloomy Christmas night. "Yeah let's go."
And just like that they walked to the parking lot, shoulders rubbing with easy conversations filling the air.
Getting into the car, sohyun didn't miss the chance to do the ultimate "let me fix your seatbelt for you" move, and if making xinyu stutter and blush was her goal, she has successfully achieved it.
And that's the story of how they found themselves driving down the main roads of Seoul, off to a place even xinyu didn't know where it's located.
Yooyeon knew exactly what was going on inside of seoyeon's mind, she noticed all the glances the girl sent her way all throughout the day, there was worry, confusion and curiosity in her eyes that felt somehow mocking to yooyeon or maybe it's the fact that today isn't just another ordinary day for her and she might be a little over sensitive but, in her mind seoyeon had no right to look at her that way.
That was probably why she asked the girl not to wait up knowing damn well it will only make her roommate worry even more but she couldn't help it, she wasn't on her right mind for the past few days leading up to this day, the 24th, and oh how she dreaded it.
She tried all day long to hide how she really felt, to act normal and composed, a big contrast to the rage and hurt and brutal memories that haunted her mind, trying to convince herself that she was okay felt like asking a fish to breathe outside of water.
Suffocated, drowned, choked and dead is how she felt as she walked through the streets of Seoul, a shell of her real self, with no actual destination in mind. At that moment she didn't care if she looked absolutely crazy, in pyjamas and slippers, bumping into ppl with no care in the world. All she wanted was to be alone and freed from her thoughts, those scenes that kept playing in her mind like a broken record, fire, sirens, sobs, alone in a dark room that held their frames, at just 5 years old.
Back then she didn't want to believe it. She never thought that there will come a day where she would lose any of them, her parents and grandmother, let alone all of them at once, yet her biggest fear came true, too soon, on a Christmas night, a night everyone celebrated with family and friends yet there she was at the age of 5 laying on a hospital bed wondering what's going to happen next.
The people that came acted like they cared, like they weren't there for the free food and drinks the funeral house had to offer. Yooyeon was so young, she wasn't supposed to understand the gravity of the situation, she wasn't supposed to be greating guests that came to give their condolences, when all she wanted was to crawl to a corner and cry herself to sleep calling out her parents names.
And here she was 13 years later, Christmas again, with only one thought in mind, getting rid of the pain once and for all.
She thought she was getting better, it's been 13 years she should be over it by now, she tried to convince herself, but it was to no vain. They say kids tend to erase trauma if it happened at a very young age, as a coping and defense mechanism but she never did and it makes her wonder, why didn't her younger self develop that?
She never believed in god either, especially not after she was old enough to know the meaning of the word, it felt meaningless to her, it felt like made up lies to make people feel better but, to her, the whole concept made her extremely sad because if god existed why would he take away the only people she loved at such a young age? Why?
She found herself standing on top of the han river's bridge looking over the water, enveloped in thoughts she buried years ago, thoughts that crossed her mind every Christmas since the age of 12, thoughts that led her straight to where she was now. The bridge.
She wanted to heal, she really did but, she was alone in a big world that doesn't easily accept her kind, an orphan, with no real home, no real family and no real goals. An orphan, that everybody pitied but never cared enough about to actually help. A kid that was ripped out of her family's warmth to live in a world as harsh as ours. Sure she had her goals in mind, she had her future planned but then again society was a brutal reality check that led her back to those decisions in the first place.
And this time, like every other time, she turned around again, away and off the bridge. It's not that she didn't have the heart to do it, it's not like she didn't want to join her favorite people up there in the sky, she did but there was something and someone holding her back, a certain brown eyed girl and the fact that her parents would be disappointed, her parents hated people that gave up easily and she wasn't about to be that person, the one that gives up easily.
Usually she would head straight back to the orphanage but now she's an adult and a drink won't really hurt, right? At least it will erase, make her forget her growing pain that doesn't seem to be subsiding anytime soon.
Sohyun was a gentlewoman that's how best xinyu can really describe her character. She doesn't want to call their outings a date yet but during the 2 dates she had with the barista she couldn't help but notice how mannered and gentle the woman that was sitting in front of her was.
She would do absolutely anything xinyu asked for, a cup of water, a bite from her own dish, a towel...everything. And xinyu wouldn't change that for the world. Being cared for and adored by someone you, yourself like is a great feeling she'd prefer diving deeper into.
So here they were after a dinner and a few drinks sitting on the swings of an empty playground near xinyu's dorm, enjoying the comfortable silence that hang in the crispy air filled with the holiday's atmosphere, sharing secret glances at each other from time to time. Enjoying each other's presence, minds having the same thoughts that non of them dared to let out.
"Hey" after hearing the girl's hesitant voice, sohyun turned around to look at the pretty woman sitting on the swing next to hers.
"Hmm?"
Xinyu's breath hitched when she met sohyun's curious yet comforting brown eyes. She felt her words catch in her throat, forgetting for a second how to really function.
"I- I was thinking..." A pause. She was nervous and it was evident so, she averted her eyes back to the night sky. "Our little hang outs...I know it's just the second time we actually went out but..."
If you take a look at sohyun right now you will definitely think she resembles a confused and lost puppy, she didn't know where this whole conversation was going or what xinyu was trying to say but she tried her best to make sense of it.
"I don't want this anymore." That felt like a punch to the guts if you ask sohyun, but, before she could speak or complain xinyu added.
"Us being just friends I don't want it" the air of confidence that suddenly envelopped xinyu was surprising, she continued "since the day we first met, about a month ago, it might be a little cliché but, I wanted to pursue you since then. I kept coming back to the club, alone majority of the time, not really drinking anything just sitting there and watching you work" with that her gaze flicked back to sohyun "I like you, sohyun"
If you believe that sohyun isn't stupid considering how cool and charming she looks then I'm gonna tell you otherwise because sometimes that woman can be absolutely naive that it drives you insane.
"Not as a friend sohyun, I like you." She had to clarify because sohyun's frown looked so damn stupid right now.
"Oh."
That wasn't the reaction xinyu actually hoped for. An oh...really? It kinda hurts in a way, sure, she didn't want to get her hopes up, neither did she believe she had no chance. Since they met she was honest with herself and what she really felt and right now she wasn't going to deal with whatever sohyun was planning to say next, she might reciprocate xinyu's feelings but she might reject them too. In that moment xinyu didn't care, she didn't want to act like a looser the same way her friend, seoyeon, did but she got up and started walking away to her dorm's building before she could think her decisions through.
"Goodnight, sohyun"
"Wait! Xinyu! Hold on! Wait!" But that was to no vain, the girl's frame kept getting smaller and smaller as she walked away and into the building without sparing sohyun a single glance and in that moment she realized. I'm so fucking stupid.
It was past midnight already, 1am, seoyeon was still up looking at the ceiling, waiting. She was told not to but her mind wouldn't stop racing, overthinking and worrying about the girl that stole her heart before she even realized.
She knew something was wrong, and she knew that she had no right to ask about it but she was curious. Everything about the past few days felt strange, yooyeon wasn't her usual stoic self, she was sad, extremely sad and it was painfully obvious and seoyeon couldn't do anything about it or shake the bad feeling that overtook her away.
She was about to get out of bed and go on a haunt for her roommate when she heard the door unlocking. Going back under her blanket, facing the wall, seoyeon waited. For a sound, for a sign that her roommate was in need for her help. What she didn't expect tho is for footsteps to come closer to her own bed, a squeak and an added weight on her mattress as yooyeon laid next to her. For a second she didn't move but then she faced seoyeon's back and put her hand on her waist over the blanket. All seoyeon could smell was alcohol, and she felt relief knowing that even in whatever state yooyeon was in right now she was able to make it back safely. Her train of thought were interrupted when she heard a tiny, hoarser voice from behind.
"I know you're awake." busted. Seoyeon wasn't about to act again, she was tested enough already. The past month have been hard filled with her lies and maybe it was finally time to talk it out.
So, she turned around facing the girl. her breath hitching at the very close proximity between them. This was the first time she found herself in this position with yooyeon as the sober one, and it made her wonder, what did yooyeon feel back when she had to deal with a drunk seoyeon?
They stared at each other for a few more second before, out of nowhere, yooyeon moved closer and buried herself in seoyeon's chest. Like it was an instinct seoyeon found herself wrapping the girl in her arms. Those stupid feelings and the fast beating of her heart was about to get her killed and yooyeon's head laying right next to her heart wasn't helping her case either.
More silence filled the air but for the first time in over a month it didn't feel suffocating, it was peaceful, so peaceful that it scared seoyeon a little bit. Lost in thought, she was pulled out of it when she felt her shirt getting wet, finally paying full attention to the girl in her arms, she heard a sob, one that sounded so painful, so heart wrenching and agonizing that made her hold the girl tighter trying her best to be a sense of comfort.
"I miss them..." Seoyeon couldn't make out what yooyeon said, her voice was muffled by seoyeon's arms around her and by her own sobs that kept getting higher. But seoyeon tried her best to listen, to make out what the girl was saying, to try and make sense of the state her roommate was in.
"It's so hard..." sniff "being alone for years..." a sob "I miss them..."
Missed them? Who was yooyeon talking about? Seoyeon was even more confused now but she didn't dare say a word.
"Back then i never thought I would lose them all in one day..." Another sniff "the doctors said I will forget..." Clearing her throat yooyeon continued "they said kids block out painful memories but why..." silence "why didn't I...?" yooyeon was violently shaking, then her fist met seoyeon's shoulder. she hit the girl that was holding her like that will take the pain away, while seoyeon just laid there, motionless.
"I thought I was finally okay..." An inhale "that I was getting better, getting over it but..." Another inhale "nothing have changed..."
With that yooyeon pulled her face away, completely facing seoyeon now. "I went to that bridge again" a pause "I thought I will finally do it after years of contemplating you know?"
She tilted her head a little, her eyes red, full of tears that were threatening to fall again. "But then I thought of you..." Her voice cracked and she looked down as she continued "my parents might be gone but they hated those who gave up easily..." Inhaling again, she lifted her head "I gave up easily on you...on us...on them.." Silence "and today, it marks 13 years since I last saw them, Happy listening to Christmas songs in the car that led to their death, yet, you were the first one I thought about while standing there wondering if it was finally time to end this pain once and for all..."
Silence engulfed the room again, they held eye contact for a while, but then slowly seoyeon lifted her hand, placing it on yooyeon's face, wiping the stray tears away as she caressed her reddened cheek. Yooyeon closed her eyes at the gentle stroking as she felt herself melt into the girl's touch. It was a simple action but one that showed so much care and love that made yooyeon unwillingly smile.
She was miserable, she was in pain and sorrow yet a single gentle touch from the girl she fell for, but didn't get the chance to confess to, made her feel like life was worth living again.
Opening her eyes she saw those same brown orbs looking at her with so much love that made her breath hitch. That look haven't been directed at her since the age of 5 but somehow this 18 years old girl that laid next to her with her hand still caressing her cheek, looked at her like she was the whole universe and yooyeon couldn't help the tears that started welling up again in her eyes as a sob escaped her lips.
Seoyeon wasn't panicking, in fact she was taking this whole situation in better than she thought she would. This confession, this secret yooyeon finally let out made so much sense all of a sudden, how the girl was always focused on nothing but School, how she had no friends, that seoyeon knew of, how she was alone 99 percent of the time, it all clicked and it all doesn't change the fact that seoyeon was far gone and in love with the human laying on her bed.
Loving the hard-headed, unresponsive and emotionless yooyeon was somehow easy but, loving the vulnerable, fragile and broken yooyeon was easier. It's like she has finally seen her in a new light, one she would like to see and experience more of.
So when the silence prolonged, in the quite of their room, seoyeon have made a decision. She wasn't going to run away from her feelings anymore, this was like a second chance that she will embrace. And with that she moved forward as she held yooyeon's head in both of her hands and planted a small peck on her cheek.
Yooyeon wasn't completely startled but she was shocked. What the hell just happened? But before she could even utter a word, seoyeon was pulling her back to her chest, holding her tight.
"Sleep yooyeon, we'll talk tomorrow. Goodnight."
The next morning, sohyun found herself standing in front of the building she left last night feeling like the stupidest person on earth. Why did it take her that long to realize what xinyu meant? Why did she have to react like that knowing damn well that she felt the same way? She's still mad at herself but she was determined to fix her stupid mistake.
Going up to the reception of the dorm's building she found an old woman. Sipping her tea.
"Hello young lady, how can I help you?" Her voice was so gentle, old with age but inviting and comforting that made sohyun feel more at ease.
"I'm sorry to bother you this early in the morning miss, I'm just..." Pause "I'm looking for Zhou xinyu? A freshman in ewha woman's university?"
The old woman looked confused but then her face lit up, a flicker of recognition crossed her eyes. "Oh! The tall Chinese lady? She's in room 157, second floor"
"Thank you very much!" With that sohyun bid her farewell with a bow and headed straight to the stairs.
Nakyoung just woke up when she found her roommate and best friend, xinyu, sitting on her desk in a daze. She didn't hear the other girl coming in last night so she was sorta confused.
"Hey, you!" Xinyu was startled at first but then she looked at her roommate with annoyance.
"What?" Her tone was flat, and that's not really a xinyu thing which made naky frown.
"why are you sitting there this early in the morning and when did you get home last night and why do u look like you got rejected." With that the bell rang and naky walked to greet whoever it was, most likely seoyeon she thought.
Opening the door tho, naky was shocked but then confused. What the hell was sohyun doing here, fidgeting, playing with her fingers, clearly nervous? But then everything clicked, annoyed xinyu, nervous sohyun in front of their bedroom's door. Something happened and naky wasn't going to involve herself, nah not today.
"I get it now...Xinyu it's for you!" She gave sohyun a smile as the other girl smiled back nervously.
"Huh? Who?" Sohyun could hear xinyu's voice from inside filled with annoyance and that made her even more nervous.
"Oh." There stood xinyu, startled, and somehow confused on why sohyun was here but then it's like everything clicked and she narrowed her gaze to the door of the room right in front of her's and naky's.
"What are you doing here?"
"Um...I was just wondering if-" clearing her throat sohyun continued "can we talk xinyu?" She didn't let xinyu respond before she spoke again "I'll be on the swings of the playground waiting. Take your time"
With that she walked off and down the stairs and xinyu closed the door behind her, finding nakyoung looking at her with a raised eyebrow that clearly meant explain.
"I confessed yesterday...then ran away" the disappointed in naky's eyes told xinyu that she fucked up and she obviously knew that.
"Not you too...why do I have to deal with your dumbasses lord!"
"Okay I'm sorry I know, but I wasn't ready for whatever she was gonna say and her first reaction was just an oh and I got scared...c'mon naky at least I wasn't drunk and am going to talk it out with her now.."
"Yeah you better get going before I throw your whole desk at you right now" with that xinyu gave her an offended look, took her jacket and went straight out of the door.
In a building that was just 3 blocks away woke up seoyeon, it was just 7am and that added weight by her side was still there.
Looking down at the girl cuddled up in her arms, sleeping peacefully, like she wasn't breaking down right in front of her last night, seoyeon couldn't help the smile that crept on her face. She tried her best to get out of bed without waking yooyeon up and she somehow succeeded if you ignore yooyeon's sleepy protest.
After like an hour of doing her daily routine, seoyeon found herself in their little kitchen, preparing breakfast for 2 instead of one like she has been doing for the past month.
And being so engrossed in her tasks, from beating the eggs to looking for the flour to getting the milk and melting the butter, she didn't notice that she wasn't the only one awake now and just a few feet away stood yooyeon, watching her.
Yooyeon woke up with a buzzing head and for a moment she was about to wonder why when all of the memories from last night came flooding in, the bridge, the bar, the breakdown in seoyeon's arms and the brown eyes that looked at her with so much love she didn't seem to notice before.
With the memory of the other girl in mind yooyeon moved around the bed looking for contact but when she felt nothing she fluttered her eyes open just to find herself laying in an empty bed. If their room was bigger, like a house maybe, yooyeon would've started panicking wondering where seoyeon went but the smell of pancakes was overtaking their small shared room and that brought a smile to her face.
She got up, fixed herself in front of the mirror and stood by the little counter of their kitchen for a second admiring the girl moving around so effortlessly like this was a dance she was used to. A few moments later yooyeon found herself walking to the said girl standing in front of the little stove and without thinking she wrapped her arms around seoyeon.
Seoyeon flinched at first and cursed under her breath when she almost burned her hand but then she relaxed knowing exactly who was the culprit standing behind her with their hands on her waist. And when yooyeon noticed how seoyeon seemed to melt against her she held her a little tighter, more confident now.
"Good morning"
"Good morning to you too" the smile was evident in seoyeon voice that it made yooyeon's own smile grow bigger.
They stood there, in that position for a while as seoyeon took the last pankcake out of the pan and into a plate that was filled with food. Turning the stove off, seoyeon felt yooyeon loosen her hold and she took that opportunity to face the girl, and oh how beautiful she looked, a mess but a beautiful mess.
Her eyes were still a little red from last night, the alcohol smell from her clothes was mixed with toothpaste smell coming from her breath and her hair was a little mess but a good one. Seoyeon smiled, so did yooyeon and before any of them said a word and before seoyeon lost her courage, she brought her face closer and landed a kiss on the tip of her roommates lips which left both of them shocked because seoyeon could swear that was not where she was aiming.
Silence followed as they both looked at each other with widened eyes but when yooyeon smiled, seoyeon felt shyness take over heras she lowered her head looking down at her feet. then she felt a hand on her jaw lifting her head back up, locking eyes again, she saw the happiness in yooyeon's brown orbs, a sight she hasn't seen in the past month, a sight that was a whole contrast to last night's yooyeon.
Her train of thought were interrupted when yooyeon spoke "the pancakes are getting cold, set the table I'll make the coffee" with that she let go and seoyeon felt the loss of the girl's presence so fast that she had to mentally scold herself for wanting too much.
_________________
Xinyu found sohyun right where she said she'll be, on the swings that held the memory of last night, of xinyu's confession and cowardness. The girl was sat on there kicking her feet on the ground as she waited, she looked anxious and stressed, yet she sat there patiently waiting for xinyu and that made the latter's heart melt.
When Xinyu sat down sohyun didn't look up, she knew exactly who it was, her scent was enough for sohyun to know that the person sat on the other swing was the girl she had slowly fallen for.
"I'm sorry for yesterday" sohyun didn't even wait a second before she talked, she was nervous and she had to get it off her chest before she goes back to her shell "since the day we first met, I knew I was screwed you know?" Looking up she continued "I was waiting for you to ask for my number or something but, you never made a move even tho I can tell you were interested, even just a little" she paused admiring the taller girl's face, that currently had a frown painted on it "but then the day u got drunk, I finally got the courage and a reason to give you my number"
Xinyu let her talk, the same way sohyun allowed her to let out her feelings yesterday, xinyu did the same.
"But then you didn't text me for a week and you didn't come to the club that weekend and I thought I scared you off you know?" Sohyun looked more relaxed now, gone was the nervous and fidgety girl that was standing in front of xinyu's bed room door 30 minutes ago "moral of the story xinyu..." She pause and smiled "I like you too and i'm so sorry for yesterday"
The smile that broke out on xinyu's face was definitely worth sohyun's nerves, not sleeping all night and getting out of bed early in the morning to get here. It was worth it.
The girl who sat on the swing next to her suddenly got up and moved her way, held her hand and made her stand up. She can feel the excitement and happiness radiating out of the taller girl and she couldn't help the smile that spread on her own face.
"Would you go on a date with me?" Xinyu was definitely thrilled and sohyun was just as delighted so without any other thoughts she moved closer and held the girl in her arms.
"Yes I would"
__________________
"I'm sorry for yesterday"
They were sitting on their little table, breakfast sat in front of them in one singular plate, in silence at first till yooyeon spoke.
"Hmm?" Seoyeon's mouth was full of pancake and syrup was threatening to spill on her shirt. She looked so happy that yooyeon couldn't even stop the little chuckle that escaped her lips as she moved her hand forward, wiping the stray syrup off seoyeon's lips, and the way her big brown eyes widened at the action was probably the most adorable thing yooyeon has ever seen.
After she finally gulped her food down seoyeon's face suddenly turned serious again.
"You were saying..?"
Seoyeon was looking straight at yooyeon's soul, that's how the latter felt, her sadest and only secret was out in the open now and it felt like her roommate can see straight past the walls she spent years building. Yooyeon never thought she'll let someone in, especially not the roommate she spent a whole month ignoring. But here they were, waking up in the same bed, sitting in front of each other with shared adoring gazes as they ate breakfast.
"About last night, I'm sorry" in seoyeon's opinion yooyeon had nothing to apologize for, in fact she's the one who should be apologizing for not just last night but the past month so, she reached her hand out holding yooyeon's.
"You have nothing to apologize for" she gave her a reassuring smile as she continued "in fact I'm very thankful you were able to open up to me even after I ruined whatever we had" she sighed as she averted her gaze to the plate sat between them "I should be the one apologizing"
Yooyeon was confused but before she could ask what seoyeon meant, the girl started talking again "that night, the one at my parents house, I remember it all too well" lifting her head she looked at yooyeon and saw the flicker of hurt in them at the mention of that call "I acted like nothing happened because..." Pause "I was scared. I didn't know if you would accept or reject my feelings, I was a coward and decided it was better to act like nothing happened but then-"
She inhaled sharply, engulfing their room in silence as their hands stayed locked with each other "then last night, when I was laying on my bed, mind racing wonder where you might be, I was about to go look for you before you came in you know? I wanted to hold you in my arms right then and there, to forget whatever problem I caused for a second and have you close...and you- you came to my bed and I was able to do exactly what I wanted, hold you tight, kiss your cheek, feel what it's like to openly love someone, freely without being scared"
Tears welled up in both of their eyes as seoyeon finished her sentence, yooyeon squeezed seoyeon's hand, nodding, encouraging her to keep going.
"You were in pain, you were sad, I wanted to ask why all day long, I wanted to be there for you but then I couldn't...when you broke down in my arms last night I felt my heart break, I wanted to erase it all, your pain, your sadness, you grief...I wanted to be there. When you said I was the first person you thought of as you stood there in agony wanting nothing more but to feel better, to have someone to hold, someone to be there and tell you that it was okay I realized that...that's exactly what I wanted to do, I realized that I didn't just like you yooyeon, we might be young, I might sound dramatic but...I don't like you...I love you"
At that point as seoyeon finished her speech, yooyeon was breaking down, full on sobbing, her head in her hands as she let her shell break again in front of the girl who loved her unconditionally, the same girl that she herself loved and adored.
Seoyeon stood up and made her way to yooyeon, turning the girl's chair to face her, seoyeon bent down and held her as she cried. When her sobs subsided, yooyeon lifted her head, as she faced seoyeon, without any hesitation yooyeon moved forward.
Lips locking in a peck both girls felt the jolt of electricity going through their bodies as time stopped for a second then they pulled away, hypnotized and mesmerized, seoyeon held yooyeon's face in her hands as she wiped her tears away, the action continuing and moving down to her lips, feeling them on her thumb before she pulled her in again, for a second there was no contact as yooyeon closed her eyes, anticipating but seoyeon just stood there in that position for a little longer admiring how beautiful the girl she fell head over heels for was.
"I love you"
"I love you too"
When they locked lips again, the kiss was sweet, slow, full of emotions they both felt deep in their hearts. All it took was one night for seoyeon to finally have the courage to truly confess, one night to get rid of their misunderstandings, one night for yooyeon to finally have someone to hold her and see her worst, most vulnerable and fragile side.