Hairball and Nymphikins

“Well? What happened?” Draco demanded the instant Harry returned to their dormitory. The other boy ignored him in favor of going over to his bed, flopping face down onto it, and groaning dramatically into his pillow.

“That well, eh?” Blaise snickered from across the room.

“What gives him the right?” Harry complained, picking his head back up. “What makes Dumbledore think he’s entitled to meddle with my life and living arrangements?”

“Besides the fact he’s the head of the Light faction and you’re the boy who defeated the Dark Lord?” Both Harry and Draco turned to shoot glares at Theo, who ignored them and continued reading his Transfiguration textbook.

“Yes. Besides that.”

“Well, let’s see - Headmaster of Hogwarts, also Head Warlock of the Wizengamot, Supreme Mugwump of the International Conference of Wizards, do I need to go on?” Theo raised his head in order to arch an eyebrow at the rest of them, only to be forced to duck a pillow chucked at him a moment later.

“None of which give him legal rights to meddle in his students home lives,” Harry grumbled, jumping up to retrieve his pillow. Vince got there first and tossed it over to him.

“What did the Headmaster even try to do, Harry?” The larger boy asked as he returned to his own bed.

“Switch custody of me from Aunt Andy and Uncle Ted over to some relatives on my mum’s side-”

“Muggles?” Draco blurted. “He was going to give you to muggles?”

“Apparently. He seemed to think some sort of blood protection would be activated if I lived with them.”

“Do you need to be protected?” Greg spoke up. “I mean, most folks who’d wanna were in Slytherin, but now you are too...”

Harry blinked at him. “Are you trying to ask whether or not I’m going to be the next big Dark Wizard or something?”

The room’s sudden silence was telling.

“Oh, for Merlin’s sake, like I’d want to follow in the footsteps of the nutter who killed my parents.”

“Does that mean you’ll be a member of the Light, then? Because in that case you’d be better off following Dumbledore rather than antagonizing him.”

“What is it with this division between Light and Dark anyway?” Harry griped, shooting another glare over at Theo. “Why can’t somebody decide to be a Grey Wizard, like Gandalf?”

“Who?” Several voices rang out with the same question, causing the Boy-Who-Lived to groan and flop back onto his bed.

Draco snickered, and jumped in to speak for his cousin. “He’s making a muggle literature reference. Gandalf the Grey was a wizard in the world of Middle Earth who meddled with other people’s affairs, started and ended wars, was generally irritating but still got hailed as a great being because he helped bring about significant changes for the denizens of the assorted kingdoms.”

“Sounds like Dumbledore to me,” Blaise snickered, before shooting a sly look at the blonde boy. “Have you actually read this piece of muggle literature, Draco?”

As his cousin reddened and remained silent, Harry chuckled. “Only because I made him a deal - he read ‘The Hobbit’ and ‘The Lord of the Rings’, and I taught his house elf how to prepare a bunch of the muggle foods I’ve gotten him hooked on over the years.”

“Ah, of course.” As the other lads laughed, Draco shot Harry a dire look that promised retribution. The dark haired boy responded by poking his tongue out and blowing a raspberry.

The rest of the school week passed without too much of note, filled mostly with the usual matters that came of a few hundred students all settling into new routines. On the weekend, however, were three separate events that would later prove to be highly influential to the future of the Boy-Who-Lived.

First, early on Saturday morning, came Harry’s private tryout with the Slytherin Quidditch team captain, Markus Flint. The teen gaped when Harry rocketed off the ground, running through a standard series of professional tricks and movements much faster than any eleven year old had a right to. Several paces behind him, Draco was smirking in triumph, while Professor Snape watched with a single eyebrow raised.

When the boy finally landed, he sent a cautious glance at the captain.

“Potter,” Markus finally managed to say. “You’re gonna be our new Seeker.”

“Are you sure? You don’t want me and Higgs to compete or-”

“Merlin’s beard, Potter, you’d outfly Higgs in a heartbeat. Nah, get your permission slip signed, a decent broom, and be ready for practice next week. I’ll let Higgs know he’s out the job today.”

Harry wrinkled up his nose. “That seems a bit harsh. Wouldn’t it go over better to move him to the reserve team?”

“Reserve? We don’t have a-” Markus paused. “Y’know what, kid, that’s not a bad idea. Professor Snape, can we get a reserve team set up?”

“I leave it in your hands, Mister Flint.”

“Brilliant.”

Heading back to the castle, Harry and Draco exchanged beaming grins.

Later that day, though, in order to get away from the excited whispers about him, the new Seeker headed off to the library for a bit of privacy. With his homework tucked under one arm, the boy was heading for the most secluded corner he could find when a wall of book stacks caught his eye. Wandering a bit closer, Harry peered around the side of it and found the same bushy-haired Gryffindor girl he’d first noticed at breakfast on Wednesday.

“Erm, excuse me?” The girl glanced up at him in surprise. “Granger, isn’t it?”

“Hermione Granger, yes,” she replied, studying him. “And you’re Harry Potter.”

“Yeah. Look, I’m not trying to intrude, but are you actually planning to read all these this afternoon? Or did you just make the barricade to hide yourself?”

“Oh, no, I’ve already read all these.” Hermione waved a hand at the books.

“Hn. Fast reader.” Harry gave her an impressed look. “Don’t suppose you’d mind my joining you back here? I could use a good barricade myself.” She seemed startled at his query, but scooted further down the table to make room for him to pull over another chair. “Thanks.”

The two of them remained there for sometime, working on their own assignments in silence. Harry noted the occasional confused looks Hermione would send at him, correctly interpreting them as bewilderment over why anyone, let alone such a famous individual in the Wizarding World, would ask to share a space with her for such a long period.

As far as Harry was concerned, he was doing a lonely girl a good turn, and would hopefully be viewed a bit more normally in return.

When they left the library together to head to dinner, he asked if she’d like to meet up in the same manner again. Surprised once more, Hermione gave him a nod, agreeing to be in the same spot the next Saturday. Noting that the girl then went to sit by herself at the Gryffindor table, Harry decided to talk to Neville and Ron about including the witch in their future get-togethers.

He brought it up the very next day, as the four boys headed for Hagrid’s hut at the edge of the school grounds.

“Not that bloody know-it-all,” Ron groaned as soon as Hermione’s name was mentioned. “She’s such a pain! Always volunteering answers, acting like she’s so much smarter than the rest of us-”

“Well, considering how much she reads...”

“Not helping, Neville.”

Harry huffed a sigh, then noted the look on his cousin’s face as the blonde began to speak. “Draco, if you’re about to tell me not to waste my time trying to help a muggleborn, I swear I’ll turn all your uniforms’ sigils from Slytherin to Gryffindor.” The other boy promptly shut his mouth with an expression of abject horror, which of course set Ron and Neville off cackling.

Hagrid happily welcomed them all in, offering tea from a massive pot, and cakes that upon inspection proved harder than granite. The conversation started off with how well the boys were all settling into their new routines, then switched to Harry’s new Quidditch position, which of course set off an argument over the professional teams. This last was mostly held between Ron and Draco, and only ended when Neville spoke up to ask how Nymph was doing in the Aurors.

“She’s good,” Harry replied, grateful for the change in topic. “A bit stumped by her new case, trying to help Gringotts solve the mystery of that robbery earlier this week.”

All four of the boys jumped when Hagrid set down the re-filled teapot a bit more forcefully than needed.

“...In point of fact, her last letter was mostly ranting about how close-lipped the goblins are being about the whole-thing, and the difficulties that she’s having when she doesn’t even know what the object was or who took it out earlier that day.” As he spoke, Harry watched Hagrid out the corner of his eye, noting how stiff the large man was becoming. “Don’t suppose you’ve heard anything along those lines, Hagrid?”

“Hm? Oh, no, can’t say I have.”

“It was withdrawn the same day as the robbery?” Draco asked in surprise. “Well, that’s suspicious right there.”

“It is?”

“Of course, Weasley. Anyone sophisticated enough to get past goblin security wouldn’t have been tripped up by something as trivial as mistiming their theft - the owner of the item must have known they were about to be stolen from, and decided to move their property without any advance warning.”

Hagrid coughed.

This time, all the first years watched him, until the man became so discomfited that he spoke. “As a matter o’ fact, lads, I took that parcel out fer the Headmaster. An’ I’d be obliged if’n ye didn’t go mentionin’ it t’ anyone, understand?”

“Don’t worry, Hagrid, we won’t tell a soul.”

And for the time being, the matter was dropped.

After Halloween night, and the troll incident, the matter came back up.

Harry, as a matter of principle in order to honor his parents’ sacrifice, had decided to remain in the Slytherin common room rather than go to the feast. His dorm mates each offered to stay with him in their own ways, but he sent the lot on to enjoy themselves, even Draco. Professor Snape had also checked in on him just before the meal started, but left with the assurance that Harry was going to read ahead in some of the Potions texts for later years. Surprisingly, after clearing the air about the Marauders, the two had begun developing something of a mentorship (it helped that Harry was genuinely interested in his professor’s subject, and already wielded more skill than was typical for his yearmates). This meant that Snape was willing to trust that he wasn’t remaining behind in order to lay the pieces for a prank upon the rest of the Slytherins.

Not half an hour after the feast officially began, however, a doe patronus manifested in front of the sofa where Harry was reading. Sufficiently surprised, it took him a moment to realize the thing was delivering a message.

“Mister Potter,” Professor Snape’s voice snapped out authoritatively. “You will remain put where you are, and do not move under any circumstances. There is a troll loose in the dungeons, but it should not be able to enter our common room. The rest of the student body has been ordered to remain in the Great Hall while I and the other professors deal with the troll.”

With that, the patronus faded.

Blinking, Harry’s gaze flicked over to the main door, to his book, and back to the door. The sudden urge to go poke his head out into the hall, just to check, was extremely difficult to ignore. It took all of the boy’s willpower to turn his head entire head back down in order to focus on the text.

Then there came a massive whump at the door.

Jerking his head back up, Harry watched with wide eyes as the thick stone was bowed inward by a second whump. With the third, a crack appeared in the door, green and silver sparks spitting madly from it.

Harry jumped to his feet, Potions book falling to the floor, and began to back away as the door and its protective enchantments started to fail. When the massive club became visible, he pulled out his wand. And just as a huge, grimy hand showed up, pushing at the hole in the wall, Harry shot off the most powerful stinging hex he could.

There was an irritated grunt from the other side, and then the club started to smash about with greater ferocity. Gulping, Harry moved as far back as he could, only coming to a stop when his shoulders hit the opposite stone wall. He tried the Bombarda spell he’d read about in Nymph’s textbooks, but only managed to knock some more dust from the rubble. A cutting curse didn’t have much effect either, and Harry was starting to get desperate when several distant voices shouted at once. The troll paused in its efforts to enter the Slytherin doorway, before slowly tipping over. It landed with a jarring crash that shook the ground beneath Harry’s feet.

He didn’t notice the white-knuckled grip he had on his wand, still pointed at the doorway, and jumped when Professor Snape suddenly placed a hand on his shoulder.

“Are you alright, Potter?”

“Um,” he stared at where the rest of the teaching staff were milling about the troll’s body, several of them casting plain looks of concern at where he stood. “Yeah, I’m fine. That- that certainly wasn’t how I expected my evening to go.”

“I’d imagine not,” Professor Snape said dryly, carefully tapping on Harry’s wand hand. The boy released his tight grip, unleashing a huff of air as he did so.

Dumbledore entered the room then, glancing about before making a beeline towards the two Slytherins. “Harry, my boy, are you well?”

“I’ve been better, Headmaster.” Harry replied, unconsciously mimicking his Head of House’s tone. “But I’m not hurt, at least.”

The old wizard let out a sigh of relief. “Very good, dear boy. Severus, I think it is safe to say the Slytherin students should sleep in the Great Hall tonight, so that we may repair the entrance.”

“Agreed, Headmaster. In the meantime, perhaps you should consider sending someone to check on the safeguards-?”

“I had Pomona and Silvanus go there straight away, Severus. They’ll ensure that the package is not disturbed.” At the word ‘package’, Harry’s ears suddenly picked up, and his thoughts immediately sped back to Hagrid’s admittance of picking up a parcel from Gringotts for Dumbledore, just before it could be stolen by someone ingenious enough to get past the goblins.

“Good. In that case, I’ll take Mister Potter to the Hall now.” At his Head’s nudge, Harry snapped back to the present, and carefully started off to the wrecked doorway. Slipping out into the hall without tripping on the rubble took some doing, but he managed, followed close behind by Professor Snape. They were a few corridors away and almost to the staircases before Harry spoke up.

“Sir? What’s the Headmaster hiding in the third floor corridor that someone wants to steal so badly they’d set a troll loose as a distraction?”

The Potions Master froze, staring at Harry with a mix of incredulity and utter disbelief.

“...I’m going to pretend you didn’t ask me that, Mister Potter.”

“But-”

“Drop it, Potter. If this were a matter to be known by the students, then the Headmaster would have said so at the beginning of the year.”

Harry sighed. “Yes, sir.”

The rest of their trip was made in silence. As the two approached the Great Hall, Harry could pick up on the dull roar of hundreds of voices murmuring amongst themselves. Then they arrived at the doors, which Professor Snape pushed open with a wave of his wand.

Every student within the Hall went silent at their appearance, and then quite a few Slytherins surged up from their seats out of concern for the overly pale Boy Who Lived.

“Sir?” Markus Flint was the first to ask. “What happened?”

“The troll attempted to enter our dormitory. Fortunately, it was delayed by Mister Potter, and then stopped by myself and the rest of the staff. Tonight, as the entrance to the Slytherin dormitories has been badly damaged, my house will be sleeping here. The rest of you will return to your houses only when your Heads arrive to escort you.” With that, Professor Snape gave Harry a nudge towards the Slytherin table, before turning on his heel and departing again.

The boy only made it a few steps before his yearmates gathered around him, and then the lot were absorbed by the ranks of older Slytherins. Other students across the Hall craned in their seats in order to catch a bit of the forthcoming explanation, made easier when one of the seventh year prefects cast an amplification charm for Harry to speak into.

“-was just reading,” he said, his words caught and sent throughout the room. “When the Professor’s patronus appeared, ordering me to stay put. I was still wondering whether or not I should check outside the door when something big hit it - and I mean really hit it, enough to bend the stonework.”

“Bloody hell,” everyone heard Draco mutter as well.

“It only took a few swings of that club for the troll to make an opening, and that was when I tried firing some spells at it - not that they did any good, sadly. I’d backed up to the far wall and was trying to figure out my next move when the professors all got there, and they took it down with an onslaught of spells. Whole thing was over in just a few minutes.”

“Weren’t you scared?” Pansy asked, eyes wide.

Harry snorted. “I think a bloke would have to be barking mad not to be scared in a situation like that, even a Gryff.” Several boos were directed at him from the table of the lions. “Oh, pipe down, you lot. You can prove me wrong when you all get to stand alone in a room with an angry troll breaking down the door in order to come squash you underfoot.”

Quite a few of those same Gryffindors who’d jeered the boy suddenly found themselves being slapped into submission by their other housemates.

“What really gets me, though, is that someone did this deliberately.” Silence reigned in the Hall again.

“...What do you mean, deliberately?” Theo asked.

“Oh come on, there’s no way that troll got past Hogwarts’ defenses and walls by itself. Not to mention whatever that parcel is that the Headmaster’s hiding in the third floor corridor, the one that someone tried to steal from Gringotts just hours after it was withdrawn. I think the troll was just a distraction so that the thief could make a grab for his target - I heard Dumbledore say he’d sent Professors Sprout and Kettleburn to check on it, that means he knows why the troll was really here too.”

When it was apparent that the boy had finished, hushed conversations broke out at all tables, as students discussed this interesting turn of events. The amplification charm was removed, and then Blaise turned a shrewd eye onto his dormmate.

“You do realize, every student is now going to write home about this, and their parents are going to flood the Headmaster with complaints about the situation.”

Harry grinned.

“Which, you evidently knew in advance.” Daphne surmised.

“But of course. This is my revenge for him trying to meddle with my custody arrangements.”

Draco slowly shook his head in awe. “I don’t know what Aunt Andy and Uncle Ted were worried about - you’re the classic example of a Slytherin.”

“Thanks, cousin. Now, is there any treacle tart left?”