Golden Years

Lily had heard that the other students were excited for the talent show, and she remembered Dumbledore expressing his pleasure at the idea, but she didn’t realize just how big the excitement had become until she walked into the Great Hall the morning of the event.

The tables had been rearranged and the staff’s table had completely disappeared. In its place was a large stage. Lily looked up to see an array of theater lights hanging from the ceiling instead of the usual candles.

“Guess the professors are more excited about this than we realized,” Remus said as Lily sat down, accurately guessing her thoughts.

“Yeah,” Lily said, looking around. “Who’d’ve guessed?”

It was almost strange to see everyone so excited. This kind of energy was usually reserved for things like Quidditch games, but the entire student body was almost buzzing. It seemed as though they had an unspoken agreement to pretend they were just kids being allowed to be kids. No uncertainty, no fear, no worry.

Only ABBA.

“So, idiots and assholes,” Sirius cried out from his end of the table. “Somehow, we are all here before 8 a.m. Cheers to that!”

He got a handful of whoops in response.

“And, guess what children? This is one of the last big events of sixth year!”

More whooping. Lily didn’t understand how everyone managed to be so energetic, but despite her confusion, she smiled along with them.

“We’ve only got the Quidditch championship left, which, may I remind you, Gryffindor has in the fucking bag-“ James and Marlene clapped- “and then the last Hogsmeade visit, eh?”

“You know exams are somewhere in there, right?” Remus asked rhetorically.

“Oh fuck off, it’s Dumbles, he’ll probably cancel them,” Dorcas laughed.

“Hear hear!” Sirius cried. “And so, my absolute bastard babes, I have a special surprise for all of you!”

“Bitch what?” James said. “What did you fucking do?”

“I’ve done the work-“

“You’ve never worked a day in your life and you know damn well you’re gonna be my sugar baby,” Remus called out, causing a ripple of raucous laughter. Sirius blew him a kiss sarcastically.

“I’ve done the work, I’ve done the planning, and tonight, I do so swear it, will be a most magical evening. Because Gryffindor Tower will be hosting the official talent show afterparty!”

The group cheered enthusiastically. James clapped Sirius on the back, who then took a bow.

“Well done, mate!”

“You know, yeah, I think a party is in order,” Alice grinned, her arm around Frank’s waist. “About damn time we celebrated surviving so much shit.”

“Right? This is gonna be great,” Mary said.

“Yeah, well, you all know there’s no party like a Sirius Black party, yeah? So today, we perform. Tonight, we party!”

The group cheered again, Lily outright laughing at their enthusiasm. Everyone went back to their own conversations, talking excitedly about their plans and the show, with the exciting addition of an afterparty.

“Uh, Red, could I talk to you for just a sec?” Sirius appeared at Lily’s side.

“Sure, what’s up?”

“I figured, well… I know most of the fuckery that’s been going on has been happening to you. You’ve had some supremely shitty luck this year, Lils.”

“Gee, thanks.”

“Yeah, no problem. Anyway, I figured…well, if the party gets to be too much for you, or you’re nervous, or overwhelmed, or whatever-“ Sirius shuffled from side to side, looking away. “I uh, I arranged for your dorm to be completely off-limits, no one will even go near it. I’ll set up some muffling charms and all that, and I’ll leave some snacks in there, so if you’d rather sneak off and have a quiet night in, maybe do some reading or something, it’ll be empty. You won’t even be able to tell there’s a party happening, guaranteed, and if you need anything else-“

Lily cut Sirius off by throwing her arms around him. “Thank you Sirius. Really. Thank you.”

“Yeah, sure, no big deal,” Sirius said bashfully. “Honestly, I wouldn’t be surprised if Remus snuck up there to join you.”

Lily grinned. “Jealous, Black?”

“Oh, hardly. We all know his heart belongs to me.”

“His heart belongs to chocolate, books, and sweaters, in that order.”

“Ok, yeah, but I like to think I’m maybe in fourth place.”

——————————————————————————————

“Ok, you think there’s a chance we can just not do this?”

“No.”

“Please?”

“No.”

“Consider this: my dignity is the only thing I have left.”

“That’s like saying your most treasured possession is something you got at a garage sale, Lily. It might be the best thing you’ve got, but that doesn’t make it valuable.”

“Ladies, if we could stop squabbling,” Mary interjected, “that would be excellent.”

“Right. Sorry Mare.”

“Sorry sweetie.”

“Neither of you are but I’ll take what I can get. Alice, you started us on this harebrained scheme, you can do the whole speech thing-“

“You came up with this whole talent show idea, Mary,” Remus broke in.

“Fuck off Lupin.”

“Yeah Rem, fuck off,” James said, eyes sparkling with mirth. “But Mary has another good point, which is, we need an encouragement speech.”

“You and Lily should do it together,” Sirius tossed in casually. “You know, since you two have been working together so… closely, to make this whole thing work.”

“Evans?” James looked over to her. “Is that good with you?”

Lily looked back at him.

Back at the boy who was asking her permission, simply to make a speech with her.

Back at the boy who was running a hand through his hair nervously, worried he had misstepped.

Back at the boy with hazel eyes, looking at her with concern.

Back at the boy who had changed so much since harassing her last year.

Back at the boy she had come to care for deeply.

Back at the boy she suddenly felt the urge to kiss the breath out of.

Fucking hell.

“Uh,” Lily stuttered, doing her best to use the brain cells not currently flashing alarms and going into panic mode just to keep herself standing. “Speech. Yes. Good speech need speech. Cheers.”

Alice laughed. “Lils, honey, I love you, but I think your brain finally fucking died.”

“You alright Lily?” James asked, not looking away from her once. Lily couldn’t bring herself to look back, turning to look to the side at the rest of the backstage area. Out of the corner of her eye she saw other performers stretching and getting in last minute practice. It was twenty minutes until the show. Dorcas still hadn’t appeared yet, but that could have something to do with Marlene pulling her back into the dorm when she thought everyone else had left the common room.

Marlene and Dorcas. Right. The relationship they were here to start. Speech. Yes. She could do this. She was Lily Evans, and feelings for a boy would not distract her. She was stronger than that.

“Ok guys,” she began. “We all know why we’re here. Marlene and Dorcas have come so far. We’re so close. We just have to get them to finally act on their emotions and not just-“

“Physical desires,” James supplied when Lily paused.

“Yes exactly, thank you James,” Lily said. “I know it’s been long and hard-“

“That’s what he said,” Remus piped up.

“Did you seriously fucking have to- ok, fine, sure, whatever. The point is, we’ve all worked at this. We’ve all made sacrifices, especially Mary and Peter, who I would like to thank for giving up their standard date night to help pull all this together-“ there was a smattering of applause, Mary curtsied and Peter bowed- “and really, I don’t think there’s a single one of us who hasn’t given something up for this operation. But I promise you, it will be worth it in the end.”

“Because we’re doing this for our friends,” James cut in smoothly. “And if bringing them happiness gives Sirius the chance to act like Freddie Mercury in drag, then all the better!”

“To Dorlene, and to Sirius in drag!

“Dorlene and Sirius in drag!” Everyone shouted back.

“I fucking hate you all,” Sirius grinned.

“Oh dear, however will we find the strength to survive?” Alice teased.

“I think you look hot in drag,” Remus whispered in Sirius’ ear. Or at least tried to whisper.

“Fucking learn volume control and get a goddamn room, Lupin,” Lily laughed.

“Suck a dick, Lily.”

“I actually kind of need to sing in a bit, so maybe not right now.”

“James?” Mary interrupted. “You’re looking a bit red.”

Lily turned to James, who was fiddling with his glasses and tugging at his shirt collar.

“No, it’s just the makeup, and, uh, is it getting hotter in here? Must be getting crowded. Speaking of crowds, I’m gonna go check that Frank is in position in the audience. Yep. That’s where I’m going. See you!” James hurried off.

“Huh. That was weird,” Lily remarked. “Wonder why he ran off like that.”

“Yeah,” Peter said. “There was absolutely no possible explanation for that kind of completely unusual and out of place behavior.”

“Peter, why are you being obviously sarcastic? Peter? Peter! Don’t walk away from me!”

——————————————————————————————

“Marlene…. Marlene, Jesus Christ, fucking hell,” Dorcas gasped out, tugging on Marlene’s hair with both of her hands, tensing up at the feeling of Marlene’s mouth on her skin.

Marlene grinned up at her from her spot between Dorcas’ legs. “Does that feel good, Cas? My lips on your thighs?”

“Stop fucking teasing me.”

“Teasing? I would never dream of it,” Marlene replied. “Can’t help that you look so fucking delicious.”

“So I take it you have- ah- a thing for fishnet leggings then?” Dorcas asked, stifling a moan when Marlene playfully bit down on her inner thigh.

“When they disappear into a miniskirt, hell yeah,” Marlene answered. “Speaking of the miniskirt… would you mind if I took it off?”

“Well, I wouldn’t say no…” Dorcas sighed. “Except for the fact that I only have ten minutes to get to the Great Hall.”

“What? I thought we had an hour at least!”

“Well, if you hadn’t spent so fucking long teasing me without ever taking anything off, we may have gotten a bit further,” Dorcas responded cheekily.

“Listen, can you blame me? Much as I love what’s underneath the outfit, you have to admit, the whole ensemble looks…. Well, you look fucking hot, Cassie.”

Dorcas climbed out of the bed and inspected herself in the mirror. Luckily, Marlene had taken her request seriously and avoided leaving any visible marks on her, despite the fact that she clearly wanted to. And honestly, Dorcas didn’t blame her. She usually didn’t dress boldly, but the look was actually working out? The black fishnet leggings that had Marlene drooling, the red miniskirt with a black leather sleeveless top tucked into it…

Marlene was right. She looked fucking hot.

“Yep. Thanks for not screwing any of it up,” Dorcas replied, continuing to check herself over in the mirror so she wouldn’t have to look at the girl still sprawled out on the bed behind her.

“Sure thing. Although, you’ve got just a little bit of hair out of place-“

Marlene stepped up behind her, looking intently at her hair. Dorcas watched their reflections in the mirror as Marlene carefully fixed Dorcas’ messy bun, tucking a curl back into place.

“Thanks,” Dorcas whispered, needing to break the silence, but not wanting it to end either. She wanted to press her lips to Marlene’s, fill the silence with a symphony of affection, but that would break her own rule. No kissing outside of a hookup. Damn past Dorcas for coming up with that.

“Any time. Now come on, the future talent show winner can’t show up late,” Marlene said, tugging Dorcas towards the door.

“You know I might not win right?”

“Bullshit, you’ve got this in the bag. Now let’s go, I can’t wait to see the looks on everyone’s faces when they see you in this costume, they’re gonna lose their damn minds. I don’t think any of them have ever seen you in something like this.”

“Sirius helped me pick it out, you know, he’s already seen it.”

“Wait. Sirius helped you choose this outfit?”

“Uh, yeah?” Dorcas replied, confused as to why Marlene had stopped short.

“Which parts were his idea?”

“Um, the leather tank top, I was just gonna wear a normal one… and the fishnets?”

“That bastard…. Told him that in confidence,” Marlene swore under her breath. Unsurprisingly, this cleared up none of Dorcas’ confusion.

“Marls? Are you alright?”

“Yeah. Yes, of course, doing great. Let’s get you to the show!”

——————————————————————————————

“Sirius, you disgusting little man,” Lily cried from her spot leaning against the back wall, turning to her friend. “What the fuck did you do to Dorcas?”

“I styled her, Lily, quite well in fact,” Sirius replied. They watched from across the room as Dorcas entered the backstage area.

“You put her in leather and fishnets.”

“A leather top, darling. With a v-neck. And sleeveless too. Do you know how hard it is to find something that gorgeous in the meagre shops of Hogsmeade? They’ve got a few pairs of leather pants, sure, but you’d swear none of them had ever heard the word punk before unless it was meant as an insult.”

“The red miniskirt?”

“Brings out the traces of blush on her cheeks, and you really can’t go wrong with a miniskirt.”

“Ok, that’s true.”

“Mhm.”

“And you put her in fishnets just because you know Marlene has a thing for that?”

“I can neither confirm nor deny that particular statement.”

“Of course not.”

“Lily! Sirius!” Dorcas noticed the two and ran over. “This is amazing, right?”

“Yeah, it’s great. And speaking of great, you look…” Lily let her eyes trail over Dorcas’ outfit. “Like something else, Cas.”

“Stop it,” Dorcas blushed. Sirius was right about the skirt making it more apparent. “Actually, no, don’t, flirt with me as much as you can. Just make sure Marlene’s here while you do it.”

“I’m sorry, what?” Sirius blurted out.

“Oh right. Sirius, I’ve got a massive crush on Marlene,” Doras said.

“No, I fucking got that part, why do you want Lily to flirt with you in front of her?”

“Because I’m tired of this bullshit!” Dorcas exclaimed. “I really like Marlene. And I honestly think she likes me too. And if that’s true, then dancing around our feelings and pretending we only want each other for sex is just about the most stupid thing we could do. And if it takes making her jealous to make her realize that, then so be it.”

“Wow. Where’d all this confidence come from, Cas?” Lily wondered aloud.

“Well, Princess, I guess I’ve learned from Sirius’ punk lessons.”

“Your what?” Lily turned to Sirius again, mystified.

“Well, dear old Dorcas here expressed her desire to, uh, change things up for the show,” Sirius answered, “and I thought I’d be the perfect person to teach her about the more daring, bold side of things.”

“And what exactly did you teach her?”

“That being punk is about being confident enough to take up space in a world that allows none for you,” Dorcas responded.

“Fucking christ Sirius, who knew you had wisdom in you?” Lily laughed.

“I mostly stole it from Remus,” Sirius grinned. “Now if you’ll excuse me, this queen has to change into her Crown Jewels.”

He strutted off, making Dorcas and Lily giggle.

“Did you see-“

“God, the man can’t even walk straight!”

The two laughed.

“What a weirdo,” Dorcas remarked affectionately.

“Yeah, but he’s the best weirdo.”

“Oh, undoubtedly.”

Lily smiled at Dorcas. “You know, I’m really proud of you.”

“Yeah?”

“Fuck yeah! All the new confidence, this awesome outfit, deciding to act on your feelings… it’s amazing, Cassie. It really is. Shit, dude, you’ve gotten so much braver over the past year.”

“Where’s this coming from?” Dorcas asked teasingly. “Since when do you get all emotional like this?”

“Fuck, I don’t even know!” Lily laughed. “But it’s almost the end of the year and I just… fuck, I just can’t believe how much has changed. How much we’ve learned…”

“Lily?” Dorcas said gently. “Is this still about me or are you on your own thing right now?”

Lily chuckled. “Who fucking knows?”

“Fair enough. Cheers, to no one fucking knowing.”

“Cheers!”

“All performers, please gather with your groups and be ready. Good luck and don’t be the reason my hearing finally goes,” Professor McGonagall’s voice rang out.

“Well fuck.” Lily said. She stuck out her hand. “Good luck?”

Dorcas took it, squeezing tightly. “Good luck.”

——————————————————————————————

Lily shook her head as the room burst into applause as the last singer walked away into the backstage area and then disappeared into the crowd. “Fuck, that was good. Anyone know the girl that did that?”

“Damn Lily, and to think I thought we had something, but you don’t even remember my name,” Lily heard a voice from behind her. She whipped around.

“Emmeline!” She cried, throwing her arms around the girl. “I didn’t know you could sing! And you grew out your hair!”

“Yeah well, I don’t sing very often, but I don’t think I’m too bad,” Emmeline grinned. “And as for the hair, I just wanted to switch things up a bit, put a charm on it. Think I might keep it this way though.”

“Hey Vance, what’s up?” Alice greeted her. “The hair looks great, and you’re definitely not too bad at singing.”

“Yeah, voice of a bloody angel,” Remus called out from where the Marauders were lined up behind them.

“Thanks Rem!” Emmeline called back. She smiled at Lily. “So, I never thought I’d see the day Lily Evans sang in front of the school.”

“Yeah, well, if I’m lucky I’ll go into cardiac arrest before I get onstage,” Lily replied.

“You haven’t changed.”

“Never do.”

“One might call that stunted growth.”

“One might also question why you should expect an already perfect thing to improve.”

“Quick as ever.”

“And twice as clever.”

Emmeline laughed loudly. “Ok, you get bonus points for the rhyme.”

“Why thank you,” Lily replied. “I work very hard.”

“Mmm, but do you still play very hard?” Emmeline said, stepping closer, voice dropping. “Because if that’s the only thing that’s changed about you, it’d be a real shame.” She bit her lip, grinning roguishly at Lily.

“You coming to the afterparty?” Lily asked coyly.

“Uh-huh.”

“Well then. Find me there and you can see if anything’s… changed,” Lily challenged, letting her eyes trail over Emmeline’s figure when she paused. The Ravenclaw girl was just wearing jeans and a t-shirt, but there was no denying that she was still Lily’s type.

Emmeline smirked. “I might just do that. Have fun up there, Evans.”

With that, she turned and walked away. Lily turned back to her friends.

“What?” She asked, looking around to see them gaping. “Is there something on my face?”

“Well apparently tonight it’ll be covered in Emmeline’s lipstick!” Alice replied. “Since when are you and Emmeline Vance… whatever the hell that was?!”

“Since fifth year,” Lily replied casually.

“You and Emmeline are dating? Why didn’t you tell us?” Mary gasped.

“What? Oh, no, we’re not dating. She’s just fun to flirt with, you know? And if I’m bored at parties, well, she manages to make things interesting.”

“Ok. Ok, good,” Alice responded, clearly relieved.

“Good?” Lily repeated incredulously. “What, would it be that bad if we were dating? Emmeline’s nice!”

“No, no, I’m sure she’s nice,” Alice hastily corrected.

“She’s just not who you’re like, meant to be with,” Mary finished.

“Exactly.”

“Whatever, weirdos,” Lily snorted. “Time to get this show on the road.”

——————————————————————————————

Ultimately, Lily didn’t remember much of her own performance.

But dear god, she would always remember the Marauders’.

Sirius in a slinky black dress with pearls and white elbow length gloves, strutting around the stage, belting out the lyrics to ‘Somebody To Love’, Peter behind a set of drums almost bigger than he was but absolutely killing it anyway, Remus playing the guitar, slightly hidden in the shadows but clearly enjoying himself, and James.

James, singing back-up and and playing the piano.

James, wearing a tight black t-shirt and jeans.

James, his eyes alight with excitement and energy.

Shit.

She needed to get this crush under control, and she needed to do it fast.

“Lily?” Mary interrupted her thoughts. “Are you alright? You’re scowling.”

“M’fine,” Lily mumbled. “Just, uh, just waiting for Dorcas to go up.”

“I think she’s right after the boys, so it won’t be long,” Mary replied. “Are you sure you’re alright though?”

“Yeah, yeah, of course.”

“I find that difficult to believe.”

“Fuck off, Macdonald.”

“Uh-huh.”

“That means go away.”

Instead of doing that, Mary leaned back against the wall next to Lily. “Hey, did you know when I realized I liked Peter, I was really mad at myself?”

“What? Why?”

“Because, well, I thought it would be a distraction. I wasn’t doing too well in my classes back then, and the Marauders were still in their douchebag phase, and I thought it was the worst possible thing that could happen.”

“But you two are amazing together!” Lily exclaimed incredulously. “I mean, Frank and Alice are always gonna be Hogwarts’ dream couple, but you two are fantastic!”

“Well, now we are. But only because I pulled my head out of my ass and decided that Peter was worth the risk of rejection, you know?”

“Huh?”

“I realized that even if he rejected me, I’d rather have him know how I feel than not. Because, ultimately, love isn’t about keeping yourself safe. It’s about giving, and if all I could give him, if all he wanted from me, was the knowledge that someone in the world liked him? I wanted to give that to him.”

“Mary?”

“Yes?”

“Why are you telling me all this?”

Mary snorted. “Well, I was hoping you might find it a valuable lesson, but I suppose you haven’t even realized why your head is up your ass, so it may take a while for the meaning to sink in.”

“What?”

“Oh bloody hell, just watch the show, Lily.”

——————————————————————————————

Unlike Lily, Marlene really wouldn’t remember much of the Marauders’ performance. She wouldn’t remember much of any of them.

Except Dorcas’.

She scanned the common room, looking for the girl in question. Unable to see her through the throng of party-goers, she sank into a chair, drink in hand, and continued to bury herself in her memories.

Memories of Dorcas, onstage, with flashing lights, screaming the words to a punk song Marlene only barely recognized considering she was largely focused on the singer instead of the lyrics. Had she tuned into the music a bit more, she would have noticed it was a song she had danced to during one of their Girls’ Nights, blasting the radio and jumping around as though the rhythm had made a home in her bones.

But now, the song would forever stay in her mind as Dorcas’ song. Dorcas’ song, sung in those fishnet leggings, and that miniskirt, and while she was moving her hips in just that way, and holy shit Marlene needed to find her immediately.

She stood, pushing her way through the crowd.

“Micks, you bitch, where’ve you been hiding?” Sirius appeared at her side, slinging an arm around her shoulders. “How did you enjoy the show?”

“It was great, you bastard, really great. Have you seen Cas anywhere?”

“Ugh, should’ve guessed you’d only want to spend time with the girlfriend.”

“Sirius.”

“Yeah yeah, last I saw her, she was by the fireplace. Do use a condom, dear, don’t want her to catch anything from you.”

“Fuck off.”

“Love you too,” Sirius laughed, stumbling slightly as he began to walk off.

“Sirius?”

“Yeah?”

“The show really was great,” Marlene smiled. “And thank you.”

Sirius grinned. “Go find your girl, McKinnon.”

Marlene set off, the common room feeling much bigger due to the enormous mount of people in it. She waded through the chaos, laughing to herself as she realized it was probably the most focused she had ever been at a party before.

Wait, fuck. Since when did she do this? Track down one specific girl at a party, only flirt with her, only want anything with her? Since when did she pass up the opportunity to play around a bit for a single person?

Since Dorcas.

Fuck.

She was getting too soft.

But then, she finally caught a glimpse of Dorcas. And with the way she looked, the way the firelight shined on her, the way she seemed comfortable, confident, at ease in her own skin?

How could any other person, any party, anything else ever compete with that?

Marlene walked forward, determined to catch Dorcas’ eye, distract her from whoever she was talking to-

Marlene stopped in her tracks.

Who the fuck let Jack Barrow in?

And why did he get to talk to Dorcas?

And why was Dorcas smiling at him like that?

Marlene froze in place, watching the two from a distance. She fumed as Jack grinned, saying something to Dorcas that made her laugh. Not her fake, uncomfortable laugh, but her real one, usually reserved for their friends or Marlene herself.

But a second later, Dorcas’ laugh wasn’t even on Marlene’s mind.

Nothing was. She went completely blank.

Because a second later, Dorcas’ lips had found a place on Jack’s cheek.

And Marlene had no right to be jealous.

But fuck.

Since when did she get hurt like this?

Oh, right.

Since Dorcas.