Golden Years

“I want to do something! I’m bored.” Alice threw her books down on the common room table.

“Come flying with me,” Marlene said brightly. “I’m clear to fly again.”

“You know I hate flying,” Alice replied.

“Yeah but I’m only clear to fly if someone is with me.” Marlene pouted.

“Take Dorcas then,” Lily said from the couch, “isn’t she the one who’s supposed to make sure you don’t overwork yourself?”

“Well, yeah, but she had a really busy day and she’s really tired and I don’t want to bother her. Plus she’s scared of flying and I don’t want to scare her,” Marlene said like it was obvious.

Lily sat up. “How do you know all that? She didn’t say anything about a busy day or being scared of flying.”

“She did that little jaw thing when I asked how her day was,” Marlene reasoned.

“What little jaw thing?”

“When she’s annoyed or tired, she clenches her jaw. It’s kinda hard to notice but she does it.”

“How do you know that?” Alice asked.

“Years of annoying her. Also her jawline is really sharp and hard not to notice,” Marlene replied, blushing almost imperceptibly.

“Well, then she should definitely go out with you,” Lily said, stressing the innuendo to make Marlene, usually the shameless one, blush even more.

“What.”

“Yeah, she should go out flying with you. You’re supposed to take it slow, so you can teach her how to fly better and get some flying in yourself. Win-win situation,” Lily argued.

“That’s….. actually a decent point. I’ll go ask her,” Marlene said, going up the stairs to the dorms.

“OK, Dorcas is definitely going to say yes, so the second they leave, the rest of us are having a meeting in the boy’s dorms. We have something to discuss,” Lily hissed to Alice.

Alice looked at her confusedly. “What? Why can’t they be there? What do you have to say?”

Marlene and Dorcas came down the stairs before Lily could answer.

“Hey guys, Marlene is gonna teach me how to not fall to my death, so we might not be back until dinner. If I don’t come back at all, Marlene is a worse teacher than previously thought,” Dorcas said, grinning despite her previous annoyance.

“Hey!” Marlene shoved her shoulder. “I’m a great teacher. At least a good flying teacher.”

“Uh huh. See you guys later,” Dorcas said as she and Marlene disappeared through the portrait hole.

“Ok come on,” Lily said, jumping up from the couch and bounding up the stairs to the boys’ room.

“Lily, what is this? What are you so excited abut?” Alice asked as Lily tugged her into the room.

“Ok, we’re all here, we can get started now,” James said to everyone. “Lily, if you would present the board?”

“Of course, James,” Lily said, pulling a mini-whiteboard out of her robes’ pocket and enlarging it.

“What the fuck is this? Why are you two playing nice with each other? Why does the whiteboard say Doctor Who theories?” Sirius asked.

“Oh that’s my bad,” Lily said, turning the board to show the other side.

“Operation Dorlene?” Mary read aloud.

“Exactly, dear Mary. Lily, take it away” James said with a flourish.

“Right then. I’m sure you’ve all noticed something between Dorcas and Marlene. The longing glances, the hugs, the closeness, that forehead touch back when Marlene was in the hospital?” Lily began, a marker writing down each example.

“Well, sure, but they’re just really good friends,” Frank said.

“Yeah, they’re just pals,” Peter echoed.

“Gal Pals,” Lily and James replied in unison.

“What?” Remus asked.

“Listen, what we’re about to tell you is sensitive information. You can’t repeat it, you can’t let anyone know that you know, and you can’t let anyone know we told you,” James said.

“Alright, what’s the big deal?” Frank asked.

“Marlene told Sirius and I that she likes Dorcas,” Lily said.

“What the fuck, Evans?” Sirius exclaimed. “She said not to tell anyone!”

“I know but it’s ok, Sirius,” Lily replied placatingly. “This is good for her.”

“How?”

“Because Dorcas likes Marlene back!” James said triumphantly.

“Hold on, what? Marlene likes Dorcas? Dorcas likes her back?” Peter asked.

“Yeah, how do you guys know this?” Mary questioned.

“Ok, Marls told me and Sirius she liked Dorcas when she came out to us. It was awhile back, but believe me, she’s still head over heels for her,” Lily answered.

“Cassie came out to me as bi over the summer. That’s why we spent a lot of time hanging out, she needed someone to talk to and I lived nearby and she knew I was accepting. She told me about her huge crush on Marlene about two weeks after she came out to me, and judging by the way she talks about Marlene’s legs, the size of her crush and lady-boner is only growing,” James said.

“Please never say lady-boner again,” Lily groaned.

“Yeah, I heard it when I said it. Bad choice,” James responded.

“Anyways, we’ve been listening to them go on and on about their big gay feelings for each other for way too long, and we’re tired of it. We need to-“

“Get them to bang,” Sirius grinned.

“I think they were going to say get them together,” Alice replied.

“Yeah, Alice is right. Although they do need to get rid of their sexual tension somehow,” Lily mused.

“Ok, I assume you’re asking for suggestions, right? Cuz I’ve got the perfect plan,” Sirius said.

“Alright mate, go ahead,” James replied.

“Ok, so we hook Cassie up with a guy. No wait, keep listening. That gets Marlene really jealous. So she goes to confront Dorcas about it, but she only gets more angry. And then, whoops, what do we have here? They’re having angry, passionate sex in a broom closet. That relieves the sexual tension, but knowing Marlene, she’d try to play it off as having an itch to scratch and Dorcas being the easiest way to get to it. So Cas breaks it off with her guy and is in a friends-with-benefits situation with Marlene. Then, say Marlene were to get injured. Maybe she gets hit with a bludger and re-breaks her ribs, maybe a prank she was helping us with backfired. It’s not a big deal, but it’s enough to get Dorcas scared. And then, when she goes to see Marlene in the hospital wing, she confesses all her big gay feelings and Marlene does too and bada bing, bada boom, happily ever after.”

Everyone stared at Sirius in awe and slight horror.

“You know, that’s actually pretty good except for all the pain it would cause them,” Remus said.

“The pain is necessary, babe. They have to struggle for each other early or they’ll pay for it later,” Sirius replied.

“Ok, I’m putting it on the board, but it’s a last result. Anyone else got anything?” James asked, writing “Painful FWB Situation” on the whiteboard.

“Ooh, a mix-up blind date,” Peter said.

“A what?” Lily asked.

“A mix-up blind date. Tell Marlene you’re setting her up with someone to get her over Dorcas, tell Dorcas the same thing, and have them end up at the same date. Neither of them would waste free food and a night away from us, so they’ll stay despite it being with one another. They’ll realize that they fit well together in a romantic atmosphere, and hopefully they enjoy it enough to want to do it again, so one of them has to ask the other out,” Peter explained.

“That’s really good, Pete,” James remarked. “You’re a romance genius.” He wrote “Blind Date Mix-up” on the board.

“He definitely is,” Mary said, leaning over and kissing Peter’s blushing cheek.

“Ew,” Alice said. “I’m with Sirius. They’ll admit to sexual attraction before romantic feelings. I say we have Dorcas shadow the quidditch team. I’ve been trying to start a school paper. We get it going and assign Dorcas to be a sports reporter. She spends time with the Gryffindor quidditch team, which means she watches Marlene work out all the time. Her self-control will snap like a crisp Cheeto and next thing you know, they’re banging in the locker rooms after a match. After that, they’ll come to you guys,” Alice gestured at Lily and James, “and all you have to do is tell them to confess their feelings and bam! Dorlene is not only boning, they’re in a committed relationship.”

“Too many sex references, I veto,” Lily said.

“That’s kinda close to how you and I got together,” Frank remarked quietly.

“First off, ew. But I guess if it worked for you guys, it could work for them,” James decided, writing “Gryffindor Scores And So Does Dorcas” on the board.

“Nice title,” Lily scoffed, but she was smiling.

“I thought it was pretty clever,” James retorted teasingly.

“Ok, does anyone think it’d be better to let them handle this on their own?” Remus asked.

Everyone turned questions stares towards him.

“Babe,” Sirius said, “we have an opportunity to interfere in their lives for the better. We are so not passing that up.”

“I wouldn’t even pass up interfering in their lives for the worse,” Alice remarked.

“Ok, we have friends-with-benefits, a mix-up blind date, and Gryffindor Scores And So Does Dorcas. Any other suggestions?” James asked, scanning the board.

“Yeah. Just tell them their feelings are mutual and let them handle it,” Remus said.

“Yeah, we’re not gonna do that,” Mary replied. “Have Cas sing in front of Marly.”

“What?” James asked.

“Oooh, that’s good, Mare, that could really work,” Lily praised.

“Why would that work?” Peter asked.

“Dorcas is a fantastic singer, and Marly really loves her singing,” Lily responded.

“Yeah, she went on about it for hours. Apparently Dorcas was singing La Vie En Rose in French while she had her hair up in a messy bun and was sleepy and it was the sexiest thing Marlene had ever seen,” Sirius recalled.

“Yeah, she’s got it so bad,” Lily grinned. “But how do we get Dorcas to sing in front of her? It’s not like she does it that often.”

“Ooh, I’ve got it. Everyone’s been kinda down since the Hogsmeade visit, right? What with Mulciber being expelled and everyone else being scared, no one is having much fun. Lily, Remus, you two pitch an idea to McGonagall. A school-wide talent show, to help cheer everyone up and make sure they’re not worrying themselves to death. After she agrees, all we have to do is convince Dorcas to sing, and then, before you know it, bam! She and Marly are making out in a broom closet,” Mary suggested.

“Why do all of your plans end with them making out in a broom closet?” James muttered, but he wrote “Talent Show” on the board.

“Ok, that’s four plans. Anyone else got anything?” Lily asked. “Remus, we know you disapprove, you don’t have to contribute. Frank, anything from you?”

“Actually, I’m with Remus on this. Let them figure it out on their own, we don’t need to cause them unnecessary pain.”

“Boo, you’re useless,” Peter said. Frank just shrugged.

“Thank you for remaining rational, Frank,” Remus said, shooting a smug look at Lily. Lily, ever the mature prefect, stuck her tongue out in retaliation.

“Ok, so the four plans then,” James said. “Let’s take a vote. Which one do we start off with? All in favor of the talent show, say aye.”

“Aye,” said Mary and Peter.

“Ok, that’s two,” James said, putting two tally marks on the board next to Talent Show. “All in favor of Gryffindor Scores And So Does Dorcas, say aye.”

“Aye,” said Alice and Frank.

“Ok, that’s two. All in favor of starting with the Blind Date, say aye.”

“Aye,” said Remus, Lily, James, and, surprisingly, Sirius.

“Ok, that’s four for the blind date. We start there,” James said. “If it doesn’t work, we move to Gryffindor Scores And So Does Dorcas, and if that doesn’t work, we move to the Talent Show. And if, god forbid, none of that works, we move to Sirius’s plan.”

“Alright, when do we start?” Alice asked.

“How about we do the blind date thing next Friday?” Lily asked.

“Sounds good to me. I handle Dorcas, you and Sirius handle Marlene?” James asked.

“Sounds great to me,” Lily answered.

“Ok, cool. Go ahead and put away the board. The first meeting of Team Dorlene is adjourned. Remember, this information is secret. Do not let anyone know what we are doing,” James said seriously.

“Sure thing, mate” Sirius said.

“Yeah, we won’t have a problem with that. We’ll manage to keep it under wraps,” Mary said.

The group left the room, talking about their plans for the weekend and homework.

“Do you think this’ll work?” Lily asked, watching them leave.

“No way to tell,” James answered. “But I think that they care enough about each other to make it work.”

“Ok. Right, well, see you at dinner.” Lily began to leave, suddenly feeling awkward.

“Yeah. Hey, Evans, I’ve been meaning to ask you something,” James said, also awkwardly.

“You’re not going to ask me out again, are you? Because, no offense, James, but I’m not really into you like that-“

“No! No, no, Merlin, no,” James chuckled. “That was a jackass move. I’m sorry I bothered you so much about that. I shouldn’t have done that and been so awful about it last year.”

“Oh. Ok then, what is it?” Lily asked, feeling relieved that James wasn’t going to repeat last year.

“I kinda need some help in muggle studies,” James said. “I’m not really around muggles very often, and I’m not doing as well as I should be in the class. Could you help me out?”

“Oh. Sure, James! I would be happy to,” Lily answered. “What do you need help with?”

“I could use some help with this computer stuff. I mean, I kinda get it, but not nearly enough to pass a test on it,” James said.

“Ok, when do you want to get started?” Lily asked.

“Um. Is now good?” James asked, running a hand through his hair. Lily used to be annoyed when he did that, thinking he was trying to look cool, but she now realized it was actually a nervous tick.

“Now is great, James,” she said warmly. James grinned back at her, going to get his textbook.

——————————————————————————————

“So why did you and James come to dinner together?” Marlene asked, raising an eyebrow.

“I was helping him study for a muggle studies test. Why did you and Dorcas get back so late?” Lily fired back.

Marlene blushed and looked around. “I’ll tell you about that later.”

“And me, right?” Sirius popped up beside them.

“Jesus Christ, Black, how did you even hear us?” Lily asked.

“I hear everything, Evans. You’re gonna tell me too, right?”

“Yes, Sirius, I’ll tell you too. Meet us in the common room later,” Marlene answered.

“Excellent,” Sirius said. “Got to stay updated.”

“Why?” Marlene asked.

“You listened to me ramble about Remus all last year. Seems fair,” Sirius responded.

“Yeah, I guess so.”

“Also I really love gay drama.”

“There’s the truth.”

“Both of you can fuck off,” Marlene grinned. “My life is not your entertainment.”

“But it’s ever so ridiculous, darling,” Sirius replied.

“Go to hell, Black.”

“I’ll see you there.”

“I will tell Satan that you’re single and into him.”

“I’ll tell him that you want to suck his-“

“And that’s enough from both of you!” Lily said, cutting off the friendly argument. “Please no more, I will cry.”

“Wow, spending time with James has really wound you up, huh?” Marlene said, raising her eyebrows suggestively again.

“Fuck off McKinnon,” Lily replied.

“Yeah yeah.”

——————————————————————————————

“Ok so give us the details bitch.” Sirius settled on the couch, laying across it with his head on Lily’s lap.

“Ok, so we head out to the field, and obviously I’m not just gonna hand Dorcas a broom and let her steer herself into a building, so I got the steadiest, easiest to control broom I could find and told her to hop on.”

“You wanted her to hop on something else, didn’t you?”

“Shut up Sirius. Anyway, she got on the broom and somehow immediately started wobbling and shit, so I reached out to steady her. My hand brushed up like right on her hip and I just? Can’t handle it? So I grabbed her and made sure she wouldn’t fall off, but she’s still pretty nervous. So I, being a dumb gay idiot, tell her to scoot up and hop on behind her.”

“Oof, did you ‘accidentally’ grope her? I did that to Remus once. He got so flustered.”

“Sirius, first off, ew. Secondly, we’re listening to Marlene now.”

“Right, sorry. Continue.”

“Thanks. Never tell us about you groping Remus again. Anyway, I got on the broom behind her so I’m basically hugging her from behind to steer and make sure she doesn’t fall off and shit, and honestly? I might have abs and muscles and shit but Dorcas has, like, soft curves and a cute tummy and a really nice waist and her hair smells like jasmine-“

“You’re rambling babe.”

“Yes, thanks Lily. So I’m behind her dealing with my internal combustion, and she has the nerve to be all cute and nervous and sweet and shit-“

“Hate it when they do that.”

“Look who’s interrupting now, Evans.”

“At least I’m not interrupting to talk about fondling someone, Black.”

“Cuz you’ve never gotten that far with someone.”

“You know what bitch-“

“Guys! Can we get back to my thing?” Marlene asked.

“Oh right, terribly sorry darling. Go on,” Sirius said.

“Ok, so eventually we get to the point where Dorcas can steer pretty well. Then it’s just a matter of getting her to relax and not be so stiff. So I started talking to her, telling her she was doing really well and how great she was at this, but she stiffened even more for some reason, so I figured talking wasn’t helping. So I started kind of holding on to her waist and then she relaxed. We flew for about half an hour like that before it was time for dinner,” Marlene finished.

“Well that’s incredibly gay,” Sirius remarked.

“Yeah, I’m with Sirius on this. You need to ask her out,” Lily said.

“No! No way,” Marlene answered. “She’s way out of my league, and she doesn’t even like me like that. I need to find a way to get over this ridiculous crush before it gets even more out of hand.”

“I disapprove,” Lily said. “But if you’re that set on it, we could try getting you a date with someone else. Best way to move on is to just move on.”

“Yeah, I think you’re right,” Marlene replied. “I don’t know any other not-straight girls though.”

“Leave that to me,” Lily said. “I’ll set you up.”

“Ok, yeah, that works,” Marlene responded. “Sirius, what do you think?”

“I say you should ask Cas out, but if you really don’t want to, moving on is your best option,” Sirius answered.

“Ok. How about next Friday?” Lily suggested.

“Sounds good to me,” Marlene said. She yawned. “Ok, I’m headed to bed. Lily, you coming?”

“I think I’m gonna stay down here a bit, get a head start on some assignments. Christmas break is coming up soon, I don’t want to spend it working.”

“Of course not, miss perfect prefect. Goodnight then,” Marlene said, making her way up the stairs. Lily turned to Sirius when she was gone.

“Go get James and tell him to come down here. He needs to know that Marlene is in for the blind date.”

“On it,” Sirius said, scrambling up the stairs.

James appeared a moment later, groggily walking down the stairs. “What’s this I hear about an advancement in the plan, Evans?”

“Marlene has agreed to allow me to set her up on a blind date next Friday,” Lily said triumphantly.

“Is it because of the flying from earlier?” James asked, sitting down next to Lily.

“Yep. She’s too scared to ask Cas out, so she wants to try to forget about it.”

“A classic denial of feelings. Excellent. Dorcas came to me about the flying too, said she was going crazy and she had to find a way to get Marlene off her mind. I’ll pitch the blind date to her and she’ll probably agree. Then we just have to plan it and we’re all set,” James said, eyes gleaming.

“Yep,” Lily replied. “This is gonna be good.”

“Hey, while we’re down here, you mind helping me a bit more with muggle studies?” James asked.

“Not at all,” Lily responded. “What do you need to know?”

——————————————————————————————

The next day, Alice couldn’t contain her slight squeal upon finding James and Lily asleep on the couch together. James was sitting up straight with his head tilted back, and Lily was curled into his side with her head on his shoulder.

“Cas,” Alice hissed. “Get down here quick. And bring your camera.”

“Why, what’s going on- oh my god.” Dorcas immediately began snapping photos. “How long have they been like that?”

“Since last night? I never heard Lily come into the dorms,” Alice replied.

“This is too much for me. This is too good.”

“It’s about to be really bad for you.”

The girls noticed far too late that Lily had her eyes open.