Chapter 9
The Cullens returned a week later. When they entered the cafeteria together every single conversation stopped. There was something about them that Bella couldn’t name that made you hold your breath and feel your heart beating in your chest. - Or maybe it was just Bella feeling that way? Jess stared at Edward who stared back at her without any reaction.
Bella couldn’t stop looking at Alice. Over the whole lunch she couldn’t take her eyes away from her back. It was too bad that Bella and Jess had switched places today otherwise she would have been able to catch Alice’s side profile.
At one point the others noticed that Bella was glued to Alice. Mike tapped her on the shoulder.
“You okay, Bella?”
Bella shook her head. She blinked then started laughing. “Yeah? Why?”
“You’re looking at Alice like she’ll kill you or something?”
“I mean she’s kinda weird but I don’t believe she kills people?” Jess laughed.
“But, see what I think?” Mike took a dramatic pause before he continued: “The Cullens were gone while everything happened with Seattle and now that it’s out of the news, they’re back. What if it’s all related?”
Bella gave Mike a warning side eye. “That’s absolutely weird, man.”
“It is a conclusion that makes sense, doesn’t it?” Mike shrugged, waiting for the other’s approval.
“No dude.” Jess shook her head. “You say weird shit sometimes, but I think this is the weirdest thing I’ve ever heard you say.”
“Like you’re basically accusing them of mass murder? Only because they’re hotter than you?” Erica raised her eyebrow and took a sip of her smoothie. “I’m sorry Mike, but…”
“Okay, fine.” Mike sighed and got up from his chair. “I’ll see you around.”
The girls nodded.
“Well, that was weird”, Jessica whispered when Mike was out of sight. Erica nodded enthusiastically.
“Sometimes I forget how small his ego and how desperate his masculinity is.” She laughed.
“That sounds really really bad.”
“I mean he’s so jealous because everyone keeps wanting Edward even though we’ve all been resented by him.” Erica leaned over. “I think Mike also has a massive crush on you, Bella, so… You know?”
“That doesn’t make it any less weird” Jess laughed and Bella nodded.
“Also too bad that I’m not into guys.” Bella shrugged and smiled.
“Good for you, one less heart getting broken by Edward. Sometimes I also wish I wasn’t into dudes. Especially not hot ones. They are all assholes.” Erica sighed.
“And I wish I wasn’t into pretty girls. That would make me waaay less nervous.”
Jess and Erica laughed.
“It’s hard existing in a world of hot people.”
Now that Alice was back in school and therefore also back in drama class, Bella suddenly felt self conscious again while doing all the silly but fun acting exercises. Over the last couple classes she lost some of her awkwardness when realizing that no one actually cared about it - and the only way they all cared was to have fun and support each other.
But in comparison to Alice Bella felt like she was clumsy and horrible at any kind of movement. Everything that Alice did - seemed to cast spells on Bella. She couldn’t stop smiling every time it was Alice’s turn doing a scene. It was even worse when they had to do exercises in pairs, and sometimes they had to stare into each other's eyes while reciting lines and to Bella it felt like Alice stared into her soul.
“Are you okay, Bella?” Alice was so close to Bella that Bella thought she might have a heart attack. Afterall she couldn’t think of anything else. There was nothing in her head that she could say.
“Yeah?” Bella felt her hands sweating and rubbed them on her pants. This was too embarrassing.
“You look a bit stressed.” Alice smiled genuinely.
“No, I’m fine.” Bella tried to smile as well, but her smile was probably more of a horrific grin. She stopped smiling.
“I’m glad.”
They looked into each other's eyes until the teacher finally called off the exercise and sent the students into break. Bella immediately went to get her bag. Maybe her reaction was a bit extreme but she felt like she was going to die if she didn’t get away from Alice as fast as possible. She shouldn’t feel this way. No one should make her feel that way, right? This wasn’t normal. She had never felt this way before. Not a single person she had ever met made her this nervous. - And that truly had to mean something because Bella was nervous about every single thing in life.
Bella went into the washroom and splashed cold water onto her face. She had to shake off this feeling, this sensation. When a group of girls entered the bathroom she tried to calm her breath by staring at herself in the grainy and foggy mirror that probably hadn’t been clean a day since being installed. She wasn’t going to freak out because of Alice. It was totally normal that having a crush on someone felt this way, right? Right? - But at the same time, Bella stumbled upon her own thoughts: did she really have a crush on Alice? She remembered how her other crushes had felt, and they had never made her want to run to the washroom and hide. She shook her head and left the bathroom.
Only to find Alice waiting in front of the bathroom.
“Are you sure you’re okay, Bella? You look a bit sick. And you went off immediately after class, so I just wanted to check that you’re okay!”
“I promise, I am fine Alice. Just,…life?" Bella laughed awkwardly. She already regretted even making that joke.
“I know it can be tough to move schools.” Alice nodded. “If you ever feel like talking, just come up to me, okay? I’m here for you, and you know, everyone else here doesn’t seem to understand what it’s like to be new. So…"
“Thank you. That’s really nice of you, Alice.” Bella smiled.
“I really mean it.” Alice reached out with her hand, but before she could touch Bella she moved back. “I’ll see you around, well, tomorrow.” She laughed and turned around before Bella could say anything else.
And so Bella was left standing in the hallway and her heart was pounding in her chest - so fast it felt unreal. Maybe she did have a crush on Alice? Or was she just excited to meet people who were nice without the intention of bullying and stamping you into the ground for simply existing?