Chapter 67
Garp has just kind of been staring at Sengoku for the past 20 minutes, sprawled out on one of the couches in Sengoku’s office eating a pack of twizzlers. And Garp can say without a drop of doubt he can currently see Sengoku starting to grow gray hairs from whatever he’s looking at on his screen. “What’s got you all stressed, old man?” Garp asks casually, tossing his head back to down the last twizzler.
Sengoku turns to face him, his eyes wide and a vein bulging out of his forehead. “You wouldn’t believe it, Garp. Your granddaughter, Luffy, has somehow managed to make the entire world her fanbase with her little...stunts on social media! And these platforms, they just can’t be taken down, the platforms can’t be banned, The videos and photos can’t be took down or banned from the internet! It’s like they have some sort of...immunity! The whole world knows her, loves her, and she’s flaunting her pirate life in our faces, and we can’t do a single thing about it!” His voice rises with each word, and by the end, he’s practically yelling. “And it’s not just her, the whole Strawhat crew has their own pages, her division commanders too! And even a few other pirates, so I don’t even have to do anything with her crew, she just knows them, they have these… these... untouchable platforms and It’s driving the marines insane!”
Garp laughs, a hearty, deep chuckle that fills the room. “Well, she always did have a way of making waves, didn’t she? And she’s got a knack for making friends wherever she goes. But hey, at least she’s not hiding her true self. That’s one thing I respect about her.” He stands up, stretching his old muscles. “But if she’s got that kind of power, maybe we can use it to our advantage, yeah? Maybe spread some goodwill, or keep an eye on the other pirates for you?”
Sengoku just stared at him for a long, long second, before with a lot more force than was necessary, opened his laptop and started typing away like it was the last thing he would ever do. It was another long, long second of Sengoku typing and Garp raised an eyebrow at Sengoku, but before he could say anything, a notification went off from Sengoku’s computer, making him jump and curse under his breath. Garp leaned over his shoulder to look and couldn’t help but laugh out loud when he saw the screen.
Sengoku had gone to the main source of his stress, Monkey D. Luffy’s social media profile. Before Sengoku could do anything the notification that had popped up opened and started playing the video it was notifying him about. It was a video of pure chaos on the Thousand Sunny. People were drinking, eating, laughing, yelling, dancing, fighting, playing music. In the video it was focused on Luffy and Kid dancing to a country, dance-pop, EDM and folktronica song called ‘Timber’ by Pitbull, and Kesha. Luffy’s unbuttoned shirt was flapping open in the wind, her stomach bared, as she spun around with Kid. The two pirates looked like they hadn’t a care in the world, smiles as wide as the Grand Line itself on their faces. The screen was filled with their laughter and the sound of their crew cheering them on.
Sengoku fumbled with his laptop, trying to turn down the volume as the song blaired though the speakers like a siren's call to madness. “It's goin' down, I'm yellin' timber! You better move, you better dance! Let's make a night you won't remember! I'll be the one you won't forget!” The song lyrics echoed through the room, and even Garp couldn’t help but tap his foot to the infectious beat.
“Ooh-ooh (timber), ooh-ooh (timber)! Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh (it's goin' down)! Ooh-ooh (timber), ooh-ooh (timber)! Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh (it's goin' down, woo)!”
“The bigger they are, the harder they fall! This biggity boy's a diggity dog! I have 'em like Miley Cyrus, clothes off! Twerking in their bras and thongs (timber)! Face down, booty up (timber)! That's the way we like to what (timber)! I'm slicker than an oil spill! She say she won't, but I bet she will (timber)!” The song’s lyrics blared through the fleet admiral’s office as Luffy and Kid continued to dance together like they were in some country hoedown. “Swing your partner 'round and 'round! End of the night, it's goin' down! One more shot, another round! End of the night, it's goin' down! Swing your partner 'round and 'round! End of the night, it's goin' down! One more shot, another round! End of the night, it's goin' down!”
“It's goin' down, I'm yellin' timber! You better move, you better dance! Let's make a night you won't remember! I'll be the one you won't forget! It's goin' down (it's goin' down), I'm yellin' timber! You better move (you better move), you better dance (you better dance)! Let's make a night you won't remember! I'll be the one you won't forget (you won't forget)!” The song's beat grew louder as Luffy and Kid's dance grew wilder, their laughter ringing out above the music. Garp couldn't help but grin at the sight, despite the chaos it was causing in the otherwise stoic room.
Sengoku, on the other hand, was visibly flustered. He slammed the laptop shut, the music cutting off abruptly. "This is a disaster! The whole world thinks they're invincible because they can't touch her social media! It's spreading like a disease, and we're powerless to stop it!" He ran a hand through his hair, which was definitely showing more white than it had when Garp had first entered the room.
Garp chuckled, patting Sengoku's shoulder. “Look at it this way, old pal. They're not just showing off their pirate antics, they're also keeping the people entertained. Maybe it's a good thing. Besides, we know she's got the whole world in the palm of her hand. She's always had that charm, even as a kid.”
Sengoku's eyes narrowed as he glared at Garp. “Charm? This is not the time for your nostalgic reminiscing! She's a pirate, Garp! A pirate with more followers than the World Government's entire PR department could dream of!” He took a deep, calming breath, trying to compose himself. “We need to find a way to control this, or at least keep tabs on her. Who knows what kind of trouble she'll stir up next?”