Lessons at the Park
Vi doesn’t head back to her apartment to change. Instead, she finds herself sitting on a bar stool at The Last Drop, requesting a whiskey. Vander can sense something is wrong but doesn’t know how to approach the subject. So, he starts out with small talk.
“You look nice all cleaned up.”
Vi scoffs and downs her first drink. She doesn’t even have to ask because as soon as it’s gone, Vander is already pouring her another. Her eyes are transfixed on the amber liquid in the glass. Perhaps if she stares long enough at it, the substance will swallow her whole.
“Met the mother.” Vander stops. He suspected this would be a problem. They’d even discussed it. There was always the possibility the older Kiramman woman would leave it be and make no mention of the sordid history she had with the Zaunites past. It was unlikely, but there was always a chance. “She threatened to blackmail me if I tell Cait the truth about what happened.”
Vander releases a low growl as if he were a beast ready to protect his young. “What do you mean she blackmailed you?”
The two lock eyes and Vi sees the hatred for the woman boiling up. Any time the subject of the council woman comes up, he always has the same reaction. That’s what was one of the things that made the fact Cait was the first woman to garner Vi’s affection since Lex so complicated.
“I keep my mouth shut and that piece of shit stays in Stillwater. I talk, and he gets out free. She knows I’ll never sleep a wink again if that happens.” The sudden slamming of Vander’s fists on the bar reverberates through the entire establishment. All talking ceases and looks of shock and awe immediately affix to him. “Vander, he can’t leave prison. He doesn’t deserve to be free. Lex deserves justice.”
Sighing, the bartender pours two shots of rum. A remembrance shot. It was the only Vi drank the clear liquid. They’d toast to her mom and dad. They’d toast to Silco. They’d toast to Lex. All lost and moved on to whatever comes after.
“Peace to the fallen.”
“Peace to the fallen.” Vi parrots the phrase and chugs the small amount of rum. It always reminds her of the substance used to clean wounds. Smelled the same too. Once when she was 8, she’d fallen at a park. Her mother had picked her up, told her it was okay to cry because of the pain if she remembered to not hold on to it forever because she didn’t want to miss out on playing on the playground again. How much that lesson seemed to impact Vi’s life.
“Vander, we knew this was never going to work.”
“No.’
“Vander…”
“No!” He’s yelling and the stillness returns to the bar. The word echoes numerous times in hopes Vi hears it and it registers in her mind. “I saw the way she looked at you. The way you looked at her. Her mother doesn’t get to take that from you too.”
“He’s right.” Both Zaunites turn to find the woman, still in her navy gown. She elegantly strides towards them, catching the attention of everyone there. It’s not every day someone from the other side of the river shows up in the bar looking like her. “He’s right, Vi. My mother doesn’t get to choose for me.”
“Cait, this is out of your control.”
“Is it? All my life I have been told what I can and can’t do. I haven’t been a person I’ve been a chess piece. With my mother, with Maddie, and now with you.”
“Woah woah woah. I’m not playing you in a game. This means something to me.”
“Then act like it. Stop flirting and acting like I could have a place in your life only to leave when things start to get difficult. I know who my mother is and what she’s done, but that doesn’t have to stop this.”
Before Vi can stop herself, she throws caution to the wind and tells the woman exactly what she’s been sworn to withhold. “Cait, she had my parents killed. I’ve been sworn to keep the truth from you.”
Caitlyn can no longer breath. She feels the weight of the world bare down on her like never before. Rumors had made their way through her school, even when she was younger. Kids always teased her and called her “little dictator”. Once again, the war pig poster pops into her memory, but this time she can’t shake it away. She thinks of Vi telling her she wears the number 12 because that’s how old she was when her parents died. Her parents didn’t just die, they were killed. By a Kiramman.
“How?”
“A car bomb. They were going to the grocery store. I opted to stay behind and watch Powder and Ekko.”
Caitlyn looks away from Vi but catches Vander’s gaze instead. He doesn’t look angry, instead he looks sorrowful. Out of the corner of her eye, she can see Vi is fighting the urge to cry. She takes in a deep breath and exhales. What can she say? Apologies at this point are worthless, even more so coming from a Kiramman. She can’t decide if she wants to leave or envelope Vi in a hug. Before she can say anything, Vander has placed an amaretto and coke in front of her. Cait reconnects their glance and the man simply smiles before walking away.
“Vi, I don’t know what to say.”
“It’s okay, Cupcake. The sins of our fathers and mothers should not define who we become. Vander’s not completely innocent in this whole thing.” The implications of the statement hang in the air. Vi knows Vander is no saint and was just as much a part of the war machine as Cassandra. The only difference is Vander was never okay with the thought of children getting hurt.
Caitlyn remained silent, lost in the thoughts of what Vi admitted to her. The sobering realization that their lives were intertwined long before they faced one another on the field. How can Vi look at her? How can Vi trust her? After everything her mother has done how can Vi simply state that the sins of our parents are not ours to bare?
“I can never face you again.”
Vi reaches up and places a hand on Caitlyn’s cheek. “Cait, I want you to look at me.” The woman hesitates, unsure she can investigate those piercing grey oceans. Yet, desire takes over and through misty eyes, she sees the steadfastness of Vi. Vi whose commanding presence had captured her the second they’d met. Vi whose someone who could go from being the strongest person she’s met to the most vulnerable in a matter of moments. This is the Vi Jayce boasted about at her lunch with Mel. This is the Vi whose eyes act like crystal balls for a future she desperately yearns for.
“You are not your mother. I knew who you were when this started. I also knew when you found out it was going to cause issues, but I’m willing to fight through it if you are. If not, all you have to say is the word and we will go back to just being teammates. I’ll make sure you get your record and your 3rd championship. We’ll shake hands at that point and walk away.”
Nothing she does will ever make Caitlyn worthy of this woman. “I’m leaving for Ionia in the morning. My parents are both accompanying me. I swear to you I will not breath a word of this to my mother.” Vi fears this is leading down a path that ends them. Her chest begins to tighten, and she feels her breathing shallow. Suddenly she regrets giving Caitlyn an out.
“If I promise that, will you give me a kiss that will hold me over until I can see you again?”
It’s not an end, it’s a promise. Vi grins ear to ear and leans in like she did on the balcony. “Want something to help you fantasize about your dirty little secret while your away?”
“Gods your infuriating,” Caitlyn exclaims, but she’s not frustrated. She’s enamored by the fact this woman was willing to give up her deepest desires and newfound happiness to ensure Caitlyn was happy and okay. No one in her life had ever been willing to make such a sacrifice. Again, she realizes she will never be worthy of Vi’s devotion.
The kiss is soft and tender. It never deepens, it’s simply meant to let Caitlyn know she will be missed. When they pull away their eyes lock instantly and neither wants to look away.
“You still owe me a bullpen session when I get back.” Caitlyn quips.
Vi can’t help but laugh. “I mean, I think we can make that happen.”
After one more kiss, Caitlyn leaves the bar. Vi knows she can trust her secret with Caitlyn, but still wonders how everything will work. Cassandra obviously hates her and everything she represents. She will never let Vi take the role Caitlyn wants her too. Caitlyn is adamant she doesn’t care, but deep down Vi knows there must be a part of her that is dying on the inside because of it.
Two more whiskeys later and Vi has decided to say fuck it. Life is too short and can be taken away at any time to worry. Today is the day she stops worrying about the past and future and just focuses on living in the moment.