Sitting in your estranged son’s room, you’ve now acquired the getup to be a DEADBEAT MOM rather than a DEADBEAT DAD. Harry Anderson spent a little too much time getting acquainted with his alchemiter; You suppose it was only a matter of time, though. It’s fitting that the post-pubescent primo uomo spent the first several hours of his session crafting unlikely clothing combinations- he’s just like his old man. Er-
You look at yourself in the mirror above your son’s bed. Your chest strums with a sudden feathercadance, and then falters. The outfit he made for you is gorgeous. It’s such a shame that it’s on your body. Your throat tightens; your eyes fixate on the faint impression of stubble on your chin. Your fear finds its justification. So fitting that your mother-son bonding is 5 o’clock overshadowed by the time you’ve lost. The time you could have spent paying attention to your own body, to your kid. That soured a sickening push in your stomach.
Still, you hadn’t any time to feel bad for yourself. A whimsical push of the narrative was there to spur you on. The time your friends bought for you and your kids would only last for so long: for two days at most. This was the time you were supposed to spend taking focus to one of the more integral cogs of the operation. Vriska. This was the most isolated room in The Medium you could find and it was the perfect place to weave in your cracks at a time loop using what scant control you have over your narrative ability. Taking in a deep breath of whimsyflow, you begin what surely must be the most difficult task you’ve pursued in this entire session: prying information from a Thief of Light.
Your phone buzzed in your hands.
AG: Hey, dipshit! Don’t 8low up my phone!
You pause.
EB: uhhhh. what? how did you know i was going to do that?
AG: For one, none of your 8usiness. 8ut for two, you’re 8asically fucking doing it, like, constantly? And your future self ratted you out a8out all of your clever schemes.
AG: 8ut don’t worry! I have, like, more eyes on this than you could possi8ly comprehend. Trained 8oth hind and fore.
EB: i’m going to take a wild guess and say you have exactly 8 eyes “on this.” you’ve been sounding like a cocksure weirdo ever since you galavanted out of the time prison or whatever.
EB: and don’t tell me this is like some weird troll shit where i have to talk to you in reverse. because i really don’t have the time for that.
AG: Oh, trust me! You do. We’ve 8een talking a LOT, Eg8ert. I would say I’ve thoroughly yanked you out of your midlife depression, 8ut that would 8e wrong.
AG: 8ecause it would 8e more accur8 to say that you just grew out of it.
EB: excuse you?
AG: No time to explain! (That’s going to 8e a lot funnier in a few hours.)
AG: I have a message from a prophet of yours. You know, the ol’ oracle of, “weird troll shit?” you insensitive human prick?
EB: uhhh. you’ve lost me.
AG: You’ll remem8er her soon. :::)
AG: 8ut for now, why don’t I meet up with you?
The perspective shifts. On the coattails of your admittedly menial extranarrative perception, a flame-crowned figure shifts out from the mirror. A woman stands on your absent son’s bed, her eyes seemingly ablaze with cerulean intrigue. For a moment, it’s difficult to tell whether she sees you as her prey, as a tool, or as something else entirely. The Thief beams a Prospitian grin.
Vriska: Oh, you look pathetic!
Vriska: I mean, don’t get me wrong. We’ve all 8een there. 8ut you’ve gotta pick yourself up when you can!
John*: jesus fucking christ! you can just do that? just fucking float out of the mirror whenever you feel like it?
John*: i’m not entirely sure how to feel about that.
Vriska: One of the many 8enefits of 8eing hell tier, June8ug.
Vriska: 8ut my cool new powers have nothing to do with this conversation. I don’t remem8er what inconsequential thing you wanted to talk a8out 8ack now, 8ut as previously implied: doesn’t matter!
Vriska: I’m here to give you this. ::BBD
Before you can get a chance to ask how she vocalized her emoticon, she shoves a torn, long piece of red fabric marked with letters in your hands. You blink, realizing the letters are teal. Looking back to the roguish intruder, she waves and seemingly disappears into a cloud of shitty smoke. You flinch back, startled, but you’re at least 88% sure you saw the woman behind the smoke cloud walk from through the wall with a, “::::y,”-esque expression. You wave the artifact smoke away, walking to the corner of Harry Anderson’s room to read the cloth you were given.
(chatstart)
L1ST FOR JUN3
(chatend)
That’s Terezi. It’s even scrawled in her shitty quirk: a mildly infuriating reminder of the chores she had you do before she and her entire reality went caput. The idea that she could even remember that despite never being there was perplexing, but you suppose Vriska could have told her. The list you hold in your hands somewhat resembles your retJohn* list from Sburb’s past, but the instructions are all entirely different. They seem remarkably linear- at least from your own perspective -whereas the list from before required you to change seemingly innocuous details in the Seer’s life. And that name. In sent flutters in your chest. Was your name June in the future?
The name John doesn’t really fit you anymore. You’ve seen so many disparate incarnations of the same guys (ostensibly) that you’ve abandoned the concept of names being static and unchangeable. Names mean their own things to different people. Rose spoke in long soliloquies about the power of names, but she spoke of them as symbols. Archetypes. That never really rubbed off on you, but you got the idea that the power of a name was something of a conceptual illusion, that merely changing a name could change someone’s outlook on themselves. “John,” felt… like the name of a young man. You remember back with crippled nostalgia at your old days, a plucky young adventurer with whisps of stubble on his chin. And that felt meaningful to you before. It felt affirming. But not anymore. You feel stagnant, and simultaneously, formless. And the name, “June,” presents itself.
June. Is that your name? The name would have only come to you if future you would have decided that was her name. In a way, the future plays out its own form of destiny. Rolling the name around in your mind, you ponder it. It strikes the same whimsical cadence in your heart, that little part of you that calls out to be named and understood.
You’ll think about it.
For now, the call of adventure sprawls forth on a tattered scarf. You try to ignore the misplaced, seemingly flirtatious marks left on the fabric. That was an entire bag of worms you didn’t have the foresight or the stomach to comprehend right now. The first command was essentially instructing you, mostly in somatic descriptions, how and where to perform a simple jump through time.
----
This was a stupid idea. You couldn’t pry this oh-so-important information from Vriska’s stupid, cagey, carapaced lips. You’d spent a week interlaced in time loops keeping the pressure on her while she forebodingly hinted at her secrets.
Or at least that’s what you would have assumed it would be like. The Vriska you knew was 16 years old- the kind of woman who would rush into danger if it meant she had an opportunity to prove herself or protect her overwrought pride. But now, she seems like an actual adult. She seems like someone you never had the chance to be. Or someone you never took the chance to 8e. ::::/
June*: why do you keep talking like that? is it just to piss me off?
Vriska: Mayyyyyyyy8e. Or I could just 8e acting like a good friend and provide some useful countercriticism.
Vriska: I don’t want to give you the wrong idea, Juney: I 8asically think you were in the worst place to provide yourself any zest for life.
Vriska: Like, sure, I tease you here and there, 8ut I would 8e a total trainwreck, too, if I isol8ed myself like a little freak!
June*: hey! >:/
Vriska: I wouldn’t get too mad a8out it! I just might have if I initially had any choice.
Vriska: People are 8etter when they’re around other people. Well, good people. You’re normally supposed to reflect into connection, 8ut you went all topsy turvy on your aspect and em8raced DISconnection!
June*: i’m pretty sure lack of connection is, like, pretty integral to my aspect.
June*: and not that i’m complaining, but what’s with all the loose-lipped elucidation upon classpects. what happened to being all secretive and whatever?
Vriska: Oh, you know! A Thief knows when to 8e a little less stingy a8out these things. ::::)
Vriska: 8ut that’s not everything. You’re like my little pet project!
Vriska: I’ve 8een running you around in loops partially 8ecause I think it’s important you learn how to orchestr8 them.
Vriska: 8ut also 8ecause I think you’re going to learn how to move on my level.
June: what does that mean?
The space around you warps, the sprawling land out from Tavros’ rooftop twisting into a glimmery spiritscape, and then, a metallic room. Vriska’s disembodied voice finds its host roughly 10 feet away from you. Your heart stops for a moment, your gaze fixated on Vriska for the first time in 7 days. She seems younger than she was, then, but it occurs to you that maybe she was just that much older by the time she actually went back to give you that list. Her grin bared the visage of wicked intent, but beneath that, idle amusement.
Vriska: 8ecause that’s the only way you’re gonna get out of this hell and into the next one. :::;)
A snap rings throughout the room without Vriska needing to move her hands. For a moment, your skin runs cold with the chilly winter air of The Land of Frost and Frogs. Turning to look around, your vision momentarily fails you and you seem to be in your son’s room.
----
You’re getting used to this. You’ve had to herd your friends in and measure their expectations for two whole days over the span of a month. Juggling around a stream of Junes- averting your gaze from future Junes and performing telegraphed interactions with past Junes -is a lot of hard work. You’re fairly certain that messing up would mean that there would be multiple undoomed Junes, but that’s not a risk you’re willing to take. Vriska’s been teaching you, but the more you go with the flow, the better your results are. You’ve worked up to narrative-splicing across The Medium, which works just fine on its own, but you feel like your ability primarily functions on memory rather than actual proximity. Then you have to wonder, how does someone, “remember,” something that’s never happened at all? You’ve never been to where Vriska is- save for that brief interaction in that one room, anyway.
You try to remember the room. You ignore the details you feel like your brain could be making up. It was dull. There were couches? The rest is a blur. You’re not zapping anywhere at this rate. But that felt… somehow untrue. It had to be untrue. The aforementioned stream of Junes ended- there were not infinite Junes. In fact, you’ve never kept track of how many future Junes there were, but you can’t say you remember any that you haven’t become. You think. The future is uncertain and so is the room. What if you were to imagine the room reaaaaaaaally clearly and just teleport into that? Time works in such a non-linear way. You could just make the room with your mind and maybe that would be the room. It was worth a shot. You hold onto the timeline you’re in, imagine the room, and attempt to leap through it.
Your legs impact on the metal floor and you tumble over next to a candy-red couch. A harsh voice comments on your landing, accompanied by reflexive sniffing.
Terezi: OH MY GOG. COULD 1T B3??? 4 WOM4N W43R1NG CLOTH3S THAT ACTUALLY FIT H3R???
Terezi: B3C4US3, 4S F4R 4S 1’M 4W4R3, TH1S SH1P H4S 4 STR1CT DR3SS COD3! W3’R3 ONLY SUPPOS3D TO W34R TH3 T1NY L1TTLE P4J4M4S FOR W1GGL3RS TH4T W3 GR3W OUT OF WH3N W3 W3R3 7.
June: oh shove off, terezi!
June: this is the first time i’ve seen you in years and you’re already going for the jugular? wait-
Terezi: 4ND 4FT3R 4LL TH3S3 Y34RS, YOU W4NT TO COM3 H3R3 4ND HUMBL3-BR4G 4BOUT B31NG 4BL3 TO S33? TO 4 BL1ND WOM4N? FOR SH4M3!
June: uggghhh, i walked right into that one.
Terezi: Y34H. >;]
You push yourself upwards and brush the ship dust off your sonsent dress. The blind Seer smiles knowingly and something about that cocky opacity makes your grit your teeth, makes your heart spark with ingratiated annoyance. Your gaze passes over her matured form: her silly-but-admittedly-handsome Patrick Bateman-esque suit, her vexatious grin. There’s a proverbial salamander in your throat now.
June: uh…
June: how did you know about the godtier robes thing?
Terezi: VR1SK4. OBV1OUSLY. 4ND YOU, OF COURS3. >;]
June: me? oh shit, am i seriously zipping around this ship, too?
Terezi: H3Y, JUN3.
Terezi: HOW DO YOU KNOW TH1S 1S A SH1P?
You look around the room. It’s kind of dingy and it has metallic walls. You momentarily consider how shitty the insulation must be and then you remember that it’s a vessel designed for the cold nothing of space. And how do you know this is a ship? You feel the Freedom around the base, the open air throughout it. It’s a grounded ship, you can tell that now by the shape of the rooms. But you didn’t know that before. You blink and provide a suggestion, standing up from the floor to sit on the couch next to your old… friend?
June: i guess i’ve… been here before?
Terezi: EX4CTLY. >:]
-----
You’re going through what Rose went through back then, back when she got sick. Terezi feels inclined to guide you away from that. In her playfully chiding cadence, she remarks on how ungrounded you are. Taking the bait with all but combative gormlessness, you ground yourself just to get her to stop complaining about it. Part of you just enjoys the conflict with her, but you’re also feeling a bit better. “Grounding,” sounds kind of mundane, but after a while, it feels pretty good. Thinking linearly, then turning that on and off, kind of reminds you how Dave used to handle his powers.
Terezi: TH4T’S PR3TTY 4CCUR4T3.
June: does snooping in on my thoughts amuse you?
Terezi: >;P
June: i’m taking that as a yes. you and vriska got super freaky ever since i last saw you, you know.
Terezi: 4R3 YOU K1DD1NG? VR1SK4 GOT NORM4L, IF 4NYTHING.
Terezi: SH3 H4S, L1K3, 4 C3RT41N BR4GG4DOC1O, Y34H-
June: noting that lalondism!
Terezi: SHUT UP.
Terezi: BUT MY PO1NT 1S… TH4T’S K1ND OF NORM4L FOR H3R? 4ND 1 DON’T W4NT TO SAY SH3 R3M1NDS M3 OF D1RK, BUT 1N 4 LOT OF W4YS, 1T 4LL F33LS P3RFORM4TIV3.
Terezi: L1K3 SH3’S R3M3MB3R1NG TO T4CK ON H3R S3RK3T SN4RK FOR THE B1T.
June: you think so? i guess i could never tell the difference.
June: but she at least seems more mature.
June: like, on an intangible level.
Terezi: Y34H. NO SH1T, “SH3RLOCK HUM4N.”
June: but yeah, back to the time thing. i’m remembering back to when vriska popped into harry anderson’s room. she looked… i wanna say older? like not in the old lady sort of way.
Terezi: BUT YOU M34N SH3 S33M3D MOR3 PHYS1C4LLY M4TUR3 TH4N OUR VR1SK4.
June: a little? now that i have this power it would be kind of irresponsible not to clock dirk faceways at some point. but, uh, you know. i havent really gotten to it but the timeloop’s gotta end at some point. am i just gonna stay here for, like, ever?
Terezi: M4YB3. TO B3 HON3ST 1 DON’T 1M4G1N3 YOU COULD DO 4NYTH1NG TO H1M. 1 KNOW YOU ST4Y H3R3 FOR 4T L34ST 4 F3W MOR3, “W33KS.” 4ND VR1SKA ST4YS 1N TOUCH W1TH YOU FOR 4 WH1L3. BUT T3MPOR4LLY TH3 SP3C1F1CS 4R3 OBSCUR3D TO M3.
Terezi: P4RT OF M3 1S SURPR1S3D H3 H4SN’T 4LR34DY T4K3N C4RE OF YOU.
June: uhhhh. that’s foreboding.
Terezi: L3T M3 GIV3 YOU SOM3 ADV1C3 SO YOU DON’T G3T YOUR PR3TTY F4CE SM4SH3D 1N: D1RK 1S ON 4 W4Y D1FF3R3NT CONC3PTU4L L3V3L TH4N YOU.
Terezi: 1T’S L1K3 H3 FUS3D W1TH H1S SH1TTY 4UTOR3SPOND3R (B3C4US3 H3 H4S.)
Terezi: 1 WOULDN’T SUGG3ST P1SS1NG H1M OFF. BUT 1F YOU W3R3 GO1NG TO, 1 H4V3 NO 1D34 WHY H3 WOULDN’T T4K3 C4R3 OF YOU 1N1T14LLY.
Terezi: M4YB3 SO H3 C4N PL4Y UP H1S SH1TTY V1LL41N P3RSON4 4ND K1LL YOU P3RSON4LLY, 1 DON’T KNOW
Haven’t you two learned not to gossip about people when they’re in earshot?
Terezi: 1 KNOW YOU’R3 TH3R3, 1 JUST DON’T C4R3. >:]
Terezi: W4V3 4ROUND YOUR SH1TTY N4RR4T1V3 M3G4PHON3 4LL YOU W4NT.
You know, I’m quite certain I will. The insubordinate Seer was saying that neither you nor your similarly powerless contemporaries can do anything about me. I have to say, it’s kind of flattering to get the old wrench in my plan officially on board and on my side.
June: uhhh. you lost me. do- are you talking about me, or?
One of the few people with narrative control, yes.
June: i think you really misinterpreted what i wanted to do here, dude.
June: the plan originally included socking the shit out of you.
And you just might have succeeded in that if you didn’t incompetently wander into the proverbial lions’ den. And if you skirted narrative accountability by clinging to Roxy, or something. But now you’re caught between the fingers of the two stowaways on my little universe recreation project, and you’re teetering precariously between absolute theogenesis, and… what, being a normal person? Kind of a fucking embarrassing waste of your potential, but leave it to a Prospit dreamer to think in the short term.
Terezi: H3Y! >:[
June: normal or not, whether i enjoy this game or not, i’m still pretty fucking obligated to kick the shit out of you for stealing my kid!
June: or, like, compelling vriska to steal my kid.
Oh, and I’m sure you’d like to (I’m sure of your every emotion.) But the last time one of you threatened to grasp your little Egbertian hands around the narrative, I had to kill you to push you out of the way. But I’ve already got you firmly in my grasp, you slippery little Christ analog.
June: uhhh. what? glossing past that curveball of a last sentence, what’s stopping me from zapping right next to you and punching you in your stupid fucking face?
You literally can’t. I’d invite you to try, but you might accidentally trash the furniture when your fists phase through me. I’ve procured a few priceless timepieces for the control room and I’m planning on at least protecting them until I can move them to a new home in the universe your kids create. But I know you’re gonna try anyway, so at least touch my torso to make sure you can’t, first.
Your heart drops. You realize that this is what you wanted, it’s the Faustian bargain you all but wished for when you had that fight with Jade. You’re a horrible mom. Your son deserved better than you and the only thing keeping this shitty experience running was a couple of rooms away. You reeled back your fist, zapped next to Dirk, and dove at him with a haymaker.
When you inevitably passed through him, plummeting to the floor, Dirk caught your other arm.
Dirk: I know you’re mad.
----
Dirk made you a robot body. “Just in case,” he says. You really hope that, “case,” doesn’t come to pass.
The headaches aren’t as bad as they were when they started. You’re lying against Vriska as she fiddles with some sort of impossible 4-dimensional puzzle cube, her 8-fold eye scanning across its surface.
Vriska: Captain fucking Daedalus really made this pretty difficult to solve. ::::/
Vriska: I’m glad he humored me, at least, 8ut I really shouldn’t have taken his 8et for him to put each one of my octets in one of these.
June: pfft, yeah, you really fucked yourself on that one.
You jostle the ring on your finger. It’s one of those fidget rings: the kind people play with when their minds are restless. When you brought up how you really wanted to stop biting your nails as a nervous fidget, Dirk got to work and crafted this up between one of his projects. Now your nails have grown out. Rose(bot, technically,) helped you paint them with her newfound preternatural fine motor control, teasing you about how she could have done it sooner if only you were forthright about it. You feel the shoulder you’re lying against shuffle and a “clunk” on the floor. Vriska had dropped the cube into another dimensional axis again.
Vriska: Fuckin- >::::/
Vriska: Ugh. Sorry, Juney. Gotta…
Your hell tier companion scoots away from you and reaches down at the floor. With a weighty breath, she twisted her body along the fourth dimension. To you, it seemed like segments of her limbs had disappeared entirely with the other halves just floating there. Vriska’s head was entirely missing for a moment. Her face peeked out from the fourth dimension.
Vriska: Ha! >::::)
Vriska: Okay. Now to get out of this. ::::/
Vriska: I just gotta flip it........
Vriska: Turnways! ::::y
Vriska sat up, the obscured strips passing back over her body, and she re-aligned with the third spacial dimension. As she did, she back towards you, her head landing upwards on your lap.
Vriska: I h8 doing that.
Vriska: 8ut, uhh… you know! At least I get to do this puzzle from a 8etter position! >::::)
With her hair sprawled over your lap, you silently thank the gods (mostly you and your friends) that she doesn’t have her flame crown on right now. You have no idea how many times she’s done this, but at least you know to expect it, now. You have a hard time hiding your smile.
June: it would be so fucking funny if you dropped that and it got lost in the couch, or something.
Vriska: We’d 8etter hope not! Or else I’m going to have to 8r8k the rules and steal some luck to find this thing. >::::/
June: you know, do you ever think about the fact that dirk knows, like........
June: everything that’s gonna happen here? like obviously not everything. but i was just thinking, he probably knows whether or not you’re going to beat this challenge. and lots of other things. knowing him, he probably meticulously planned out what to say and do to get whatever result he wants.
Vriska: Hmmmmmmmm. I don’t think so.
Vriska: Like, I get where you’re coming from. And for some stuff, I would 8elieve that.
Vriska: 8ut I think he just talks to us 8ecause that’s what he likes doing, not necessarily 8ecause he thinks it would 8enefit him in some way. If I were him, it’d feel kinda fake to plan out something like that unless it was for a 8it, or something. ::::/
June: i guess. i don’t know, i just wouldn’t put it that far past him.
Your right hand is resting on Vriska’s middle; you’re fiddling with your ring. Did he make this ring to make you like him? Did he make this ring so that you would have this thought process about him? And what might that say about all this, about the session and your kids?
Vriska: Well, then just take it from me!
Vriska: We’re fine. I’ve got a few plans, 8ut I’m just trying to keep you from flipping your shit and going all galaxy-8rained like he is. xxxxP
June: ugggghhh. if i have to get in that stupid robot body i’m gonna blow my fucking top.
Vriska: Yup. All the more reason to avoid it, right?
The puzzle cube unlocked and the first octet fell directly onto Vriska’s face. 8luh 8luh huge 8itch or whatever.