Sirius-9
NOTE: Reiny is non-binary, hence why I used they/them pronouns for them and Tom (mentioned very briefly) is their son, one year older than Sirius and is Sirius’s friend
Sirius knew if he didn’t hurry up, he was going to be late. James would murder him if he was late, especially since this was such an important day. It was Remus’s eighteenth birthday and they were all going bowling. There was a bowling alley near the cinema in Hogsmeade and after, they were all going to get supper at the Leaky Cauldron, as the food there was the best. It was going to be a perfect party, and everyone was going to love it. Weren’t they? They were all going to have a great time. Right?
Sirius couldn’t help his anxiety. He was very nervous about Remus’s party, and he really wanted it to be amazing... After all, one only had one eighteenth birthday, therefore it had to be perfect. And if it wasn’t... Well... Sirius decided he would cross that bridge if it came to it.
He grabbed his bag and phone, shoving Remus’s present into his bag and ran downstairs, kissing Alya’s cheek on his way to the door.
“I won’t be at the shop later today but Reiny should be. See you later love!” She called to him.
“Okay! I’ll say hey to them. See you,” Sirius shut the door behind him and walked over to the garage to get his bike and helmet.
It wasn’t a long cycle to the bowling alley, but it was long enough for Sirius to forget everything and just focus on the noises of nature and the feel of speeding down the roads. Cycling was another way for Sirius to be free of the world around him. When he was feeling bad, he could just get on his bike and cycle away through the country and the village for hours.
He arrived at the bowling alley slightly later than everyone else, and when he got inside, he saw everyone else at a lane waiting for him, chatting and laughing. Smiling, he ordered himself a lemonade and went over to them.
“Hey guys. Happy birthday Remus,” Sirius grinned, sitting next to Frank on the bench.
“Sirius, hey!” Remus said, beaming back at him, “Glad you could come.”
“Yeah sorry I was late.”
“Na it’s no problem,” James said, “What shall we put your name as?”
“Dog boy,” Lily butted in before Sirius could say anything.
“Lils!”
“Psh shut up Siri. You can be dog boy. Or dog star. Which is better?” Marlene said.
“Dog star ‘coz Remus is Birthday wolf boy,” Peter said.
“Okay makes sense,” James shrugged and typed ‘Dog Star’ into the stand, causing the name to appear on the screen above the lane.
“All ready?” Dorcas yelled, grinning round at the rest of the group.
“Hell yes!” Frank yelled back, and so the game began.
There was lots of cheering, laughing, gossiping and generally tons of fun. Everyone, it seemed, had an absolute blast and loved it. Remus definitely loved it. Sirius saw how his eyes sparkled with joy and his grin was so wide, it was a wonder it didn’t split his face in two. He looked so happy. Everyone looked so happy, and it warmed Sirius’s heart to be here, surrounded by his friends, celebrating the start of adulthood for one, being happy and free.
After the first game, everyone was on a real high, especially Peter, as he had won and was refusing to tell the others his technique, which everyone else found extremely frustrating. Peter just smirked at them and sipped his drink, lounging back in his seat. While everyone was having a break, Sirius took this opportunity to quickly check his messages, and when he pulled out his phone, his face went white.
39 missed calls from R
1 new message from R
‘Oh God,’ He thought, ‘This can’t be good.’
“Um... I... I need to take a call,” He murmured in Remus’s ear, “I’m so sorry. Shouldn’t take too long.”
Remus turned to face him and saw his expression.
“Are you okay?” He whispered back.
Sirius nodded, “I just... Family shite... I’m sorry. If I’m not back by next round, leave me out. I’m happy to watch.”
“Okay. I’m here if you need me,” Remus smiled encouragingly and Sirius got up, leaving the building to stand outside. Before he checked the message, he tried calling. He called at least ten times, but Regulus didn’t pick up.
“Fucking fuck,” He whispered to himself, and he opened the message.
Sirius.
Seeing as you didn’t pick up my calls, I texted you. I need to speak to you.
I’m so sorry. Really. I never meant to snap at you the other day. I was just so worked up and upset and cross that I took it out on you and I am so sorry. I cannot tell you how sorry I am. It’s not fair that I should do that. I had had a horrid day and wanted to speak to you but clearly my day was too bad then speaking to you just bought up a whole load of other shit and I’m sorry. I hope I didn’t leave you in too worse a state and if I did, I’m sorry.
I wanted to tell you this.
We’re moving. Me mum and dad. To Bulgaria so I can go to Durmstrang. I really don’t want to and I would give anything to be at Hogwarts with you but you know... Must do everything our dear parents say (note the sarcasm there big bro.)
I’m sorry I was such an awful brother to you growing up. I know we had our fun times when we were young but when mum and dad started to get more... vicious I retreated. I so badly wanted to help you but I just couldn’t. I couldn’t bring myself to disobey our parents. I’m so so sorry and I understand if you hate me. If I were you I would hate me.
I need to tell you that I will get a new number and will not use this one again. This is the last text I have sent on this number and by the time you get this I will have a new number. I’m not going to give you my new number sorry but I am going to put your number in my new phone if I need to speak to you. I’ll give you a code name. I’ll call you Star. Remember I used to call you that when we were younger and free? I miss those days. I miss you.
Remember I love you very much even if I have been a right prick. I will always be your brother until the very end. I hope to see you when we are older.
Love you heaps big bro
Reggie xx
Sirius had tears streaming down his cheeks after he had finished reading Regulus’s text. It was heart-breaking. He was now gone. He had no means of contacting Regulus and no way of seeing him. It wasn’t fair. Nothing was fair and it just had to be Sirius that received all the bad luck didn’t it? It really wasn’t fair.
Sirius stayed outside for another five minutes, letting himself have a small cry, but he couldn’t completely let go now. After all, it was Remus’s birthday and he had to focus on Remus. He could let himself go later when he was back home with Alya, but not now.
He walked quickly to the toilets and splashed his face with water, attempting to make it seem like he hadn’t been crying. After doing so, he rubbed his face with some paper towels and stared at his reflection in the mirror. His eyes were red and slightly puffy, but it wasn’t too obvious that he had been crying. Satisfied with how he looked, he slowly walked back out of the toilets and towards the lane where everyone else was.
As he neared, he heard their cheers and he knew that they had started the second round without him. He didn’t mind, and when he got back, he slid onto the bench next to Remus, who looked round at him.
“You okay?” Remus said, “You don’t look too good.”
“I’m fine. I’m with you,” Sirius replied, smiling weakly.
Remus smiled at that but was still hesitant to accept that the smaller boy was okay, “Sirius.”
Sirius sighed and lent his head on Remus’s shoulder, “Fine, I’m not. But we aren’t talking about it, okay? It’s your birthday and it should be happy.”
“REMUS! S’your go!” Alice called, “Oh, hey Siri. You’re back. Alright?”
“I’m good Al,” Sirius replied, flashing her a smile.
“Sorry we started without you...” She said.
“Na it's okay. I’m shite at bowling anyway. I’ll watch.”
“Okay. Come on wolf boy,” Alice turned back to Remus, “See if you can get a strike.”
“I’m coming!” Remus gave Sirius a quick hug and stood up to take his turn. For the rest of the time at the alley, Sirius sat quietly and watched the game play out, occasionally chatting to the others. Lily won this round, and as soon as she won, James ran forward and swept her up into a hug, kissing her lips. Everyone, including Sirius, cheered at them and they separated, both grinning like mad.
“YES FOR JILY!” Dorcas yelled, punching the air.
“Jily?” James asked, confused.
“James and Lily. It’s your ship name,” Frank explained.
“Oh. S’cute,” Lily said, tightening her grip on James.
“C’mon guys,” Peter said, smiling at the others, “I’m hungry and the Leaky’s food is the best.”
The others agreed and grabbed their bags, chattering together as they left the alley and walked through Hogsmeade towards the Leaky Cauldron. Sirius didn’t say anything, he walked a little behind everyone else and zoned out slightly, thinking about Regulus.
“Hey,” Remus nudged his shoulder, “What happened? You look really upset.”
“Sorry,” Sirius sighed, “Just Regulus. Don’t worry about it. I’ll probs speak to Ally later. Please don’t worry Re. It’s your birthday.”
“I don’t care. You’re upset.”
“It’s okay. I promise I’ll talk to Ally.”
Remus sighed and hugged him tightly, “Alright. S’long as you do speak to Alya. I’ll murder you if you don’t.”
Sirius laughed and the two of them followed everyone else into the Leaky Cauldron. They sat around a table near the window and had a look at the menus on the table. After about five minutes, a waiter came over to them, smiling.
“Hey there,” They said, “You ready to order?”
“Hi,” Marlene said, “Yeah we are.”
“Alright. I’ll take your drinks and mains if that’s okay,” They said, pulling out a pad. Everyone ordered, and just as the waiter took Sirius’s menu, he exclaimed.
“Reiny!”
“Sirius! Hey!” Reiny-the-waiter grinned, and Sirius grinned back, “How are you?”
“I’m good. You?” Sirius noticed Remus glare at him, but he ignored it.
“I’m great. I’m interrupting you all sorry,” Reiny said, “Come round soon yeah? Tom misses you.”
“Will do. See you,” Sirius smiled as Reiny disappeared into the kitchen to place their orders and grab their drinks. The nine friends settled for comfortable chatter while they waited, and Reiny came back a few minutes later with their drinks, saying the main meals would be ready in around twenty minutes.
When the food did arrive, Sirius saw Reiny had slipped a note in his salad. He pulled it out and smiled slightly when he read it.
Did you really think I would fall for the whole ‘I’m good’ huh? I won’t pester you now coz you would hate me, but please talk to Alya. I hate seeing you upset. And get her to text me when you want to come see me and Tom. Al can come as well
-R :)
He folded the note and looked up, catching Reiny’s eye as he looked up at the counter. They looked pointedly back at him and he nodded, silently telling them that he would talk to Alya. They smiled back and he went back to eating his food.
They all stayed at the Leaky for another couple of hours, talking and joking together. Sirius tried to push all thoughts of Regulus out of his head, determined to have a good time. He knew he couldn’t keep this pretence up for long, so that’s probably why he left early. They had just finished giving Remus his presents, and Remus had loved each one of them. Sirius had looked around and saw everyone else being so happy, and even himself. He was keeping up a false pretence of happiness for his friends, and it was hard.
He left after Remus had opened the last present, giving hugs to Remus and Lily, he walked out and back to the bowling alley to collect his bike. Cycling back home, he refused to let his mind wander to anything, forcing himself to focus of the road ahead of him.
When he arrived home, he saw Alya standing in the doorway. Reiny must’ve texted her when he left, and Sirius was glad. He put his bike and helmet away and walked straight into Alya’s open arms, finally letting himself go. Feeling Alya take him into the living room, he fumbled in his bag and pulled out his phone, handing it to Alya for her to read the text Regulus had sent. She read it and held him, talking to him calmly and he nearly fell asleep on the sofa, is Alya hadn’t propelled him upstairs towards his room after almost an hour of non-stop crying.
He fell into an uneasy sleep that night. One disturbed with nightmares. It wasn’t fair. But then again... Nothing was fair.