Chapter 34
Chapter 34
Cersei was crying.
For the first time in many years.
And had anyone seen her, of the smallfolk, they would naively assume that she was mourning her beloved husband.
But that couldn’t be further from the truth.
Because Robert Baratheon was a drunken, whoring pig whose death couldn’t happen to a better person. And in that sentiment, she completely understands Lyanna Stark. But unlike all those gullible fools out there, she doesn’t pity her. At all.
She isn’t able to.
Because if there was one person on Planetos Cersei Lannister hated more than Robert, it was Lyanna Stark.
The Wolven Bitch.
The Whore.
The ever-present ghost in her marriage…
The one who ruined everything.
The one who took everything away…
Contrary to what Jaimie might think, he was not her first love.
That was Rhaegar.
The Silver Prince.
The Dragon Prince.
Her Prince.
But for all that she was not the first or only girl to fall for his pretty face and sweet songs, she was one of the very few that due to her high birth could have had her ‘happily ever after’.
But some things were not to be.
Because the Lannisters?
They were Lions. And proud of it. But while Lions without a single drop of Dragon blood within their veins were found lacking, the Dornish were not. And so in the bride race for throne, Elia Martell came out victorious. Just another girl who fell for the Dragon Prince and seemed to get her happy ending. Unlike her. And for the longest time, Cersei hated Elia.
But later, she thanked her. In the darkest recesses of her mind, but she did.
Because being spited and embarrassed in such a way? Being used by the Mad King as a hostage to gain Dornish support? Successfully, that is…
Cersei envied Elia.
Because had she been the one in that situation? Her father, Tywin Lannister wouldn’t have lifted a finger to save her had the benefits not outweighed the risks.
Cersei pitied Elia.
A Princess by right of birth, a Queen to be. But she was alike Rhaella in that aspect. Too meek. Too weak. Too submissive. A Princess only in name. A Queen that was not to be.
When the Mad King rejected the betrothal offer from her father, Cersei was devastated.
A foolish girl of three and ten thought her life to be over.
And wondered…
If the Targaryens married their sisters, if her Dragon Prince preferred to wait for one to be born over marrying her, then perhaps such relations have merit. Maybe the Septons are wrong?
What if they were hiding something from them all?
Something important?
Something you only know of should you lay with one of your own blood?
Perhaps, just perhaps, she will finally understand? Finally know her Dragon Prince? At least in such a way?
And so she pursued her brother.
Not Tyrion, that Imp. Seven help her, she would never stoop so low.
Her attentions fell on her Golden Lion, Jaimie.
But what was meant to be a fleeting memory and a secret adventure, turned into a constant. The one grounding rock of her lifetime.
She had foolishly thought that after her betrothal with the Dragon Prince fell through, the next obvious choice was Oberyn Martell as the heir of Storm’s End was already betrothed. Their mothers were the best of friends after all.
And she had thought…
Why keep her innocence?
It is not as if she will be looked down on. Especially in Dorne.
But then the Rebellion happened.
And she underestimated her father’s desire to have a grandson be King. And honestly, she could understand him. She wanted, no, yearned to be Queen. But she didn’t want to be a Queen-consort. No. She wanted power. She wanted to rule.
And she did.
In theory.
Considering that Robert Baratheon was a drunken whoremonger who cared not about politics, she got the chance. The chance immediately intercepted and taken by her own father, that is.
Her marriage was made worse by multiple circumstances. Her ‘husband’ loved (or wanted) another woman. And Cersei Lannister was no Lyanna Stark. More so, she was no virgin. Damaged goods. A whore, he called her, forgetting that he was little better than one himself.
But he couldn’t return her to her father with a scandal. Not unless he wanted to lose all Lannister military, and most importantly, financial support.
And so they were stuck together in a disastrous, not just loveless, but friendless and affection-less marriage…
But she wanted happiness.
Just a least a little…
And so when her brother opened up his arms, she threw herself into them, caring not for the consequences. Consequences, that came in the form of her three beautiful, golden-haired true Lions, hidden as Stags.
Lions that have been revealed as such, truthfully proclaimed as bastards to the world.
Her worst nightmare come to life.
And there was little even her father, the Old Lion could do.
Because once a secret is out, it cannot be taken back…