I am going to kill that bastard
Later that afternoon Frieda managed to grow some roses for Fred. He was already waiting by the black lake when she arrived there.
"Here you go. Fresh out of my greenhouse."
"Frieda, you’re my hero. I’m asking her tonight. Do you think she’ll say yes?"
"Is this nervousness I’m sensing? Could it really be true that the infamous Fred Weasley is scared of rejection?"
Fred chuckled "Maybe a tiny bit. You don’t do this everyday. But what about you? Do you already have a date?," he asked cautiously.
"Not exactly. I’m thinking of asking Neville."
Fred stared at Frieda in disbelief "Do you mean that little Longbottom fella from year four? The Herbology boy?"
"Yes that’s him. But I’m not sure if he’ll say yes though. I’m not exactly the most wanted girl at this school so I’ll see how looking for a date will go."
He shook his head. "That’s not true. Maybe the ones who like you are just too scared to admit it."
"Yeah right. And tomorrow he who must not be named is coming back. Fred, I’m not you who can have practically anyone at the school. So I would really appreciate if y’all would stop getting my hopes up so much."
"Y’all?," Fred questioned.
"Yes, you, Ollie and Evie are all doing the thing where you forget that I’m not generally well liked or conventionally attractive. You all forget that I can’t go around asking anyone if they want to go out with me."
"Frieda, I think you’re highly underestimating yourself there. But if you insist."
"Yes, I insist. But thank you anyways."
The two parted ways after a catching up a bit.
Why was everybody so persistent on the idea that someone might like her? Whether it being George or Neville the likelihood of either one saying yes was very small. So she should probably just wait until someone asks her or go on her own. That was honestly the only option she deemed realistic at that moment.
Frieda went to the Hufflepuff common room in order to get to her meet up with Ollie. When she arrived there, she was greeted by a beaming boy. "What happened to you Mr Knight? Good news?"
"The best actually. I got a Yule Ball date before Evie."
"You do know that it’s not a competition right? But I’m still curious. Who is it?"
"You’ll never believe me. It’s Fleur. You know, the Beauxbatons Champion."
"You’re joking, right? That’s amazing! How did you manage to ask her? I heard the wildest stories about her rejecting everyone who would dare to ask. Poor Ron Weasley is traumatized."
Ollie seemed to be just as surprised as Frieda because he answered "I honestly don’t know. I just told her that I wanted to go with her to get to know her because she seems like a nice person. Maybe it was because I’m the only one who isn’t drooling over her."
"Doesn’t matter really. I’m very happy for you."
"Thanks. I have to tell you something else though. I invited Evie over to study with us. She sounded so sad today when she talked about her study buddy so I thought she might get a little nicer if we included her more again."
"That’s a good idea actually. When will she be here?"
That question was unnecessary because right after, Evie stormed into the common room. Of course she knew how to get in since she spent more time in there than in her own.
"You won’t believe who Cedric is taking to the Yule Ball!," she shouted before even saying hello to her friends.
"Guess we’ll find out in a few seconds," Ollie muttered. "He’s taking fucking Cho Chang. Including me, there’s literally four Asians at this school and he chose Cho Chang? Is he being serious right now?"
"What do we have against Cho now?," Ollie asked.
"Have you seen her? She’s average at best."
If there was one thing Frieda could not stand, it was bringing other girls down because of a boy.
"Evie, I know that you’re upset because you really wanted to go with him. But gossiping about Cho is not the solution here. She did nothing wrong and it’s not her fault that Cedric chose her."
Evie sighed and in order to keep the peace she said "Yeah, you’re right sorry. Let’s get to studying then."
"Wait, before we start, I have to tell you something."
Frieda knew exactly what Ollie wanted to say. But the pure stupidity of him actually wanting to rub in that he had a date and Evie did not kind of baffled her. She gave him the dirtiest look she could so he would realize what he was going to do.
"Actually, it can wait," he said not wanting to be met with the anger of Frieda.
The trio was studying like in old times. They were laughing and chatting about their last week and how embarrassing everybody behaved because of the ball even though they were exactly the same.
When they were finished Frieda was a little sad. They were not that happy together in a long time and it made her forget about her red haired problem for a while. Until Evie brought her back to reality.
"So, are you going to ask Longbottom then?"
Frieda went tense all of a sudden.
"No, I don’t think so. If nobody asks me I’ll just go alone. It’s not a big deal really."
"Okay. But I’m sure he’ll say yes. I don’t think any other girl would ask him, so why not give it a shot?"
"Are you being serious right now? I’m not asking him because he is an easy target. If I'd ask him it would be because I actually like him as a person."
"Easy there. You really like him? Maybe I can arrange something for you."
"No don’t bother. It’s okay."
"I mean you have to take someone on an actual date if you don’t want to go on your own. All of your male friends already have a date."
Frieda looked at Evie asking her silently what she was talking about.
"Well, Fred is going with Angelina Jonson, George will take Heather Mancini and Ollie got himself a Champion."
"How do you know that?," Ollie asked.
Frieda fell silent. So she was right. George really liked somebody else. And of course it was Heather. She was beautiful and nice and anything a boy could dream of. Frieda could not lie, she was mad jealous. But the more dominant feeling was pain. Sudden jolts of sharp stabs went through her chest. It felt a bit like a mild heart attack. She had this quite frequently whenever something so bad happened that her body did not know how to cope with it in another way.
The first time it happened Frieda thought that she was going to die. It was when her brother got badly injured during a Quidditch match. The moment she saw him fall her chest started hurting along with her heartbeat rising. She seriously believed that she was suffering from a heart disease before understanding that it was because she was so scared. Sometimes during very bad times she could not fall asleep at night because she was laying awake in bed being scared of dying from a heart attack.
"Frieda? Is everything alright?," Ollie asked when he noticed his friend getting more quite.
"Yeah I’m good. Just... excuse me." She stood up and went right towards her greenhouse.
When she reached it the only thing she could do was to burry her face in her sofa pillow and cry. She must have stayed in this position for quite a while because when she snapped out of it, it was already dark outside. But she did not snap out of it on her own. It was her brother storming in.
"I am going to kill that bastard. Frieda, are you alright?," with his second sentence Emil's speech became softer.
"Not really. How do you know?"
"I was talking to Ollie and he mentioned what happened. So I figured I'd look after you. Can I do something for you?"
"No, thank you," Frieda said in between sniffs.
"How could he do this to you? I’ll teach that motherfucker a lesson."
"No, don’t. It’s not George's fault."
"Really? And whose is it then?"
"It’s mine."
"But how?"
"Haven’t you seen me? I‘m pathetic. If I didn’t have this stupid tea I would..." Frieda stopped herself before she could reveal too much about herself. "You would do what?,"her brother asked resting one hand on her shoulder.
"See, if I didn’t have this I would always be scared. And not just like a little nervous. I would literally be scared to death." Emil did not really know how to answer. He was not even sure if he fully understood what she meant by that "But of what Frieda? If someone’s causing you trouble I could..." "No, no not like that." At this point tears were streaming down the younger sibling‘s face.
"Sometimes I‘m not even sure what I‘m scared of myself. Sometimes it’s classes, sometimes it’s going to my dorm because I can’t talk to the other girls there. Sometimes it’s writing to our parents even if there’s nothing wrong. I’m terrified just in case something bad could happen. Sometimes it’s thinking about you, Ollie and Evie on that Quidditch field. Sometimes it’s doing my potions homework because then I have to think about Snape. And just thinking about him makes me short of breath. And sometimes... sometimes it’s thinking about the fact that I have feelings for somebody who will never feel the same for me because I‘m not enough. I‘m not pretty like Heather or witty like Evie or brave like Ollie or smart like you. I’m nothing. Just pathetic."
At first Emil did not know how to react until he finally said "Are you kidding me?" "What?" "Are you fucking kidding me? You are the coolest and smartest girl I know. If I ever need any help, you are always there for me. You know absolutely everything. Whenever I have a question, you give me the answer. If you could take the N.E.W.T.s already you would pass them. And the fact that you are scared sometimes doesn’t make these qualities worth any less."
"But..." "No. You know what, the sheer amount of bravery it takes to be the person you are despite being this afraid of things is unmeasurable. You are so much stronger than you think you are. And I can’t imagine that George can see past that. He is not stupid. Even though it sometimes looks like it." They were both laughing for the first time that day.
"Thanks Emil. And you know, if he really wants to go with Heather then he is free to do so. I’m gonna have fun either way." "That’s the spirit!"
A few minutes passed before Emil picked up the topic of the Yule ball again. "Do you maybe know who Ollie is taking?" Frieda let out a surprised chuckle "Hasn’t he told you? He’s taking Fleur. You know, that pretty girl from Beauxbatons." Her older brother looked at her in disbelief. "Oh...," he said disappointed. "But I don’t think he actually likes her. He’s just taking her because he wanted to be faster than Evie. Why are you asking?"
"Just curiosity."
The siblings were making their way to the great hall together. Emil was protectively walking in front of his sister.
When they were sat at their respective tables he did not turn away from her. Instead, he glared at anyone getting too close to her. Well, anyone besides Ollie.
He looked at Emil from afar. "So, I can see that you two had a talk. Sorry for telling him but I was worried about you."
"It’s okay. I’m just scared that he might actually kill George for real this time."
Almost at cue, the redhead walked in. But he was not alone. On his right side walked Heather holding his hand. That was it. Frieda stood up from her place at the table. But her storming out did not go as planned as George stopped her.
"Hey Frieda." "Hi..." "So, how are things going with Neville?" She looked at him confused. What did Fred tell him? "I really don’t know what you’re on about."
"You know, because he’s your Yule Ball date."
"I don’t have a date, George. But congrats on yours. If you excuse me now, I have stuff to do."
Frieda mostly ran out so quickly because of her brother who was already on his way. She wanted to save everyone the trouble. The only thing she was interested in doing that night, was sleeping and crying.