Holy shit, can we stop dying for once?!
The air was thick with tension as the trio sat on the mat, sipping their tea in icy silence.
Valt pointedly avoided Shu's gaze, glaring at Honcho with a fiery intensity that could've melted the ice caps. Meanwhile, Shu kept desperately trying and failing to catch Valt's eye, his expression a pitiful display of regret and sadness. Poor Honcho, caught in the middle of this painfully awkward confrontation, secretly wished he could teleport to literally anywhere else.
The fireballs watched the scene unfold with a mix of pity and amusement, like a bunch of gossipy theater critics observing a disastrous high school musical.
Finally, Honcho could take the suffocating awkwardness no more. "Okay, you two," he blurted out. "I don't know what happened when I was out cold, but you guys have got to resolve this, and fast. This is so painfully awkward, it's like watching that Bel kid prance around the school musical, declaring himself the Dark Prince or something."
Valt refused to dignify that with a response. Shu looked to Honcho helplessly, his eyes pleading. "Help me, Honcho-san. Valt is furious...at both of us."
Honcho let out a groan. "I know, I should've told him I'm an exorcist sooner. But he would've thought I was insane. Hell, I'd call me insane too." He couldn't really blame Valt for being royally pissed at both of them. "How the hell did he even get bound to you? That's what I'm dying to know, Kurenai."
Shu let out a dejected sound. "He summoned me. I have no idea how he did it, but the guy has a sixth sense for the spiritual world. He even saw the Kossoris' true form without fainting." He paused, looking tired. "Then he made a wish, and well, I'm sure you can guess the rest."
Honcho facepalmed. "So that's why those bastards were ignoring us! It was you two! Jeez, this is a mess." Shu nodded solemnly.
Suddenly, they felt a fiery aura behind them. Dreading the worst, they turned around slowly and came face-to-face with a murderous-looking Valt. Honcho gulped audibly.
Valt spoke slowly, his voice dripping with barely contained rage. "Next time you two decide to exclude me from a vital conversation," he paused ominously, "I. Will. Hang. You. Both. For. The. Crows. Got it?" It was not a question.
Shu and Honcho nodded frantically, shuddering in sheer terror. Even in his spirit form, Shu had never seen anything scarier than the normally scaredy Valt being angered beyond belief. Honcho had witnessed Valt mercilessly murdering some bullies for teasing Nika, and it had not been a pretty sight. Valt was crushing his poor cup of tea, his grip on it like a vise. He spoke up again, his tone forcibly measured.
"So, are you two going to tell me everything now?" He stressed the word 'everything.' "Because if you don't, well, let's just say I'll miss your company, but not your lies. So, spill it." He glared menacingly at the other two. Shu and Honcho looked at each other, neither willing to be the first to speak. Valt pointed accusingly at Honcho. "Spill it."
Honcho had a pained expression. "Fine. Where should I start?"
"From when you said the Mysteries are criminals." Valt waved his hand, and one of the ghostly flames poured him some tea, making Shu sweatdrop at the sight of his flames obeying Valt instead of him. "I'd like to know when, how, where, why, and what. Please, do tell me everything."
"Alright," Honcho said, glancing at Shu, who looked just as terrified as the rest of them. "The Mysteries were created when the royal mages noticed some seriously freaky magical disturbances after the first war. The king, in his infinite wisdom, decided the best way to protect the people from these malevolent creatures was to put the most powerful and downright vindictive magic-related criminals in charge of it. Needless to say, that was a dumbass move, since the Mysteries obeyed no one and were constantly rebelling. It took the Magical Massacre: The Sequel for the royal family to realize the Mysteries were way too unstable to be left to their own devices."
"And?" Valt prompted, handing Shu a teacup without even looking at him. Honcho noted that they would've made a cute couple, if Shu weren't a Mystery. "Was that when the Soul Challenges and all that other stuff went down? And when did the exorcists form? And most importantly, how the hell did they even organize this whole mess so neatly?"
Honcho cleared his throat. "Yep, that's when it all went down. It took the combined power of the 13 most powerful royal mages of all time to devise the spells necessary to keep those nutjobs in check. 13 positions available, and the Mysteries are forbidden from getting attached to normal people or slacking off on their duties. We exorcists formed right after that, because we refuse to let the realm be protected by a bunch of unstable, insane criminals. Present company included, of course."
Valt seemed satisfied with the explanation and didn't press the issue further. Shu heaved a sigh of relief, his face relaxing. But not for long.
"So then how come you didn't hunt Shu before?" Valt questioned Honcho, narrowing his eyes suspiciously. "It would've saved you a ton of trouble. And Shu, why the hell did no one realize who the Mysteries are in real life? I mean, there's enough clues. What the hell?"
Honcho hesitated, nervously clearing his throat. "Well, you see... the Mysteries developed some special spells to make sure we couldn't recognize them in human form. Unless they let us in on it or we had enough magic to resist the forgetfulness, we'd never make the connection." He glanced at Valt apprehensively.
Valt turned to Shu, fixing him with a piercing stare. "And according to Honcho, you killed someone in your past life, so they gave you this position to make up for it?" Shu nodded meekly.
Valt's lips curled into a devious grin. "Is that everything? Because if not, I'm telling Zac that you, Honcho, tried to confess to Shasa on Valentine's Day and almost set the teachers' lounge on fire." Both Honcho and Shu blanched, eyes wide with terror. "And you, Shu, I'll let Zac know about your little one-night stands and your secret love of BL books."
Honcho and Shu exchanged a panicked glance, frantically flailing their arms and practically groveling as they begged Valt not to. Valt merely watched them, an amused expression on his face, and didn't deign to respond. The fireballs chittered, knowing this comedic spectacle was far from over for them…
In the middle of their Social Studies class, Ken suddenly leaned over and poked Valt, just as Daigo often did. But Valt, completely absorbed in processing what Honcho had told him earlier, didn't even flinch. Undeterred, Ken used his puppet Keru to twist Valt's ear, successfully jolting him awake.
"Ow!" Valt yelped, then realized it was Ken. "Oh, hey Ken. Sorry about that."
"Are you alright, Valt?" Besu, Ken's other puppet, chimed in. "You've been totally out of it lately. Don't tell me you've got a crush on someone!" Keru then butted in with its trademark sarcasm. "Yeah, we've had to call your name three times before you even noticed us!"
Valt nearly tumbled out of his chair. "What?! No, I don't! Why would you think that?" He paused, then added quietly, "Though I kind of wish I did..."
"Ohh, really?" Besu murmured. Ken looked guilty for a moment, but then his face suddenly brightened. "Daigo told me to tell you a story if you're feeling down. Want to hear about the School Mysteries?"
"Uh, sure," Valt replied, figuring he could use the intel on the spirit world, even with Honcho's help. "But Daigo usually just tells me the scariest ones to keep me up at night. Jeez."
"I know the perfect one!" Keru smirked. "Number 4 - The Misaki Stairs! They say you should never step on the 4th step of the B staircase by the art room. If you do, you'll be dragged into the world of the dead and cut into pieces!" Valt gulped nervously as Keru continued the chilling tale.
"And get this - students have even seen pools of blood on the stairs! But when they try to take pictures, there's nothing there. Except for a faint blood-red mist, only visible at twilight..."
Valt let out a terrified shriek, causing Ken to flinch and back away from the plants they were supposed to be watering. "S-sorry," Valt apologized meekly. Inwardly, he was panicking, remembering Shikaku-san's transformation. If changing the rumors could affect an apparition that way, who knows what could happen with this new haunted staircase story?! Valt was already traumatized from his near-death experience - he didn't need the added fear of getting ripped to shreds too! They went back to watering the plants, with Valt still shivering from terror.
"Ken?" Gumita called out. "You have a career counseling class in the art room with Ben and Daigo, right? I think you should go, it's almost time."
"O-Oh!" Ken rushed out the door, waving goodbye to Valt. "I'll see you later! Hope you feel better, then I can tell you more of what Daigo told me!" The door slammed shut behind him.
Valt watched him go, a dread-filled look on his face. "Oh god..." he groaned to himself. "I don't want to hear any more of Daigo's scary rumors. Though that was kind of him to let me know."
As Valt glanced out the window, he noticed Ken's plants blooming with beautiful flowers. The sight of them filled him with a sense of peaceful calm, the first he'd felt in days.
The next day, as Valt entered the classroom, he noticed Ken's plants were missing. "Huh?" Valt turned around, confused. "Where are the plants? Did the Kossoris try to prank me again?" He scanned the room, searching for the mischievous group, who were suspiciously perched on the windowsill. Candy in hand, Valt approached them.
But the Kossoris maintained their innocence. As their leader offered Valt a lollipop, Gumita strolled in, chatting with Naru and Nika. Her typically disinterested expression had been replaced by a surprisingly cheerful and caring demeanor, shocking both the Kossoris and Valt, whose jaws nearly hit the floor. Valt quickly collected himself and approached Gumita.
"Hey, Gumita. Where are the classroom plants? I thought Ken was taking care of them," Valt asked.
Gumita and Naru exchanged perplexed glances, and Nika facepalmed herself. Valt stared at the trio, utterly confused.
"Valt," Gumita began, "what do you mean, Ken's taking care of them? Kindo is, remember?" Valt frowned, recalling Fumiya's habit of overwatering the plants whenever he spotted Arman (especially if he’s with Pheng) nearby. Gumita placed a hand on Valt's shoulder, mirroring his puzzled expression. "Valt," she continued, and Valt knew with a sinking feeling what she was going to say next.
"Who's Ken?"
Valt frantically dialed Ken's number, his hands trembling. His mind reeled, unable to process what he'd just witnessed in the classroom.
Just minutes ago, everyone he knew had denied ever knowing Ken. Worse, they didn't even recognize his pictures, questioning if he was even a student at all. What the hell had happened to everyone? Valt nearly dropped the phone as he brought it to his ear. "Hello?" he said, his voice laced with panic. "Ms. Midori, where's Ken?"
"Ken who?" Ms. Midori replied, confusion evident in her tone. "There's no one by that name living here. Are you sure you have the right number?" Valt immediately hung up, his mind racing.
"WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?!" Valt screamed, causing nearby students to scatter in fear. "Why is no one remembering Ken? Not even his own mother?! What the hell is going on here?"
Suddenly, Valt spotted a drop of blood from a scratch he'd gotten the day before. An idea struck him. "The Misaki Stairs!" he yelled, rattling the bathroom stall door. "That must have something to do with this! Ken had an appointment in the art room yesterday...I better call Shu and Honcho!" Without further ado, he burst out of the bathroom, nearly colliding with several startled students.
"Shu! Where are you?" Valt shouted, frantically dialing his friend's number. But before he could even press call, Shu and Honcho suddenly materialized out of thin air, crashing into Valt with a loud thud.
"Ow, my head!" Shu groaned, rubbing the new red bump forming on his forehead. Honcho dizzily hoisted himself up, then began shaking Shu by the collar and shrieking hysterically. Valt tried in vain to pry the two apart. "Honcho, stop! I've got questions too, so knock it off!" Valt yelled. "RANTARO KIYAMA, I SWEAR IF YOU DON'T STOP I'M TELLING EVERYONE YOUR FIRST KISS WAS A GUY, NOT A GIRL!"
That threat finally got Honcho to freeze. "Kurenai, where the hell are Daigo and Ben?!" he screeched. "Nobody even remembers them, not even their own parents! WHAT'S GOING ON?!"
Before Shu could respond, Valt cut in, equally panicked. "Yeah, and what happened to Ken?! We're the only ones who know who they are - WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING?!"
Shu found himself caught in the middle of a screaming match between two lunatics as other students looked on with pity. Sighing, he dragged the two raving maniacs into the bathroom, pinching the bridge of his nose in exasperation. Once they were safely sequestered in a stall, Shu whirled around, his expression deadly serious.
"Alright, Valt, Honcho," he began, decked in full regalia, his dagger gleaming ominously, "what's this I hear about no one remembering your friends except you two?"
"I don't know, man!" Honcho grumbled, frustration etched on his face. "I was just trying to borrow some books and suddenly everyone's acting like those guys never existed! Do you know anything about this, Valt?"
Valt swallowed hard, his throat suddenly dry. "Yeah. The Misaki Stairs. Ken had an appointment with them in the art room yesterday, but they must have used the B stairs. I don't know how, but that's gotta be the cause. I can't think of any other explanation."
Shu let out a string of creative curses, waving his dagger dangerously close to the stall door. "Motherfucking hell, that's bad. No, worse than bad - this is a goddamn catastrophe!"
"How?! How is this bad?" Valt nearly shouted, his eyes wide with fear. "Can someone please explain what's going on?!"
Honcho's expression grew grim. "It's about the boundaries, Valt. You know how every Mystery has a piece of the realm to watch over? Those boundaries are like gates between the living and dead worlds. It's where ghosts and forgotten things end up. If a normal person wanders in, their existence in the living world gets erased, unless you've got serious magic to resist it."
Shu nodded solemnly. "Exactly. And it sounds like your friends got stuck on the wrong side of that boundary. We need to act fast to get them back before it's too late." He turned to Valt, worry etched on his face. "Would you be willing to help us, Honcho?"
"Hell yeah I am!" Honcho shouted. "Those are my friends we're talking about! I ain't leaving them to those deranged lunatics!" Shu winced at the volume, while Valt discreetly wiped his eyes.
“Come on, let’s take on the Misaki Stairs!”
"This is creepy," Valt muttered, and both Shu and Honcho silently agreed with him. Indeed, it was downright unsettling. "Why do you spirits always have to make everything so darn scary?"
The stairs were flowing with blood, bathed in a faint red mist that dripped fresh, gloppy droplets from the ceiling. Honcho looked absolutely terrified, while Shu grimaced and tried to avoid the pools as much as possible. Valt didn't even dare look at the crimson mess, but one stray drop landed on his palm, the iron scent making him feel dizzy. Steeling himself, he slowly stepped onto the first step, his mind racing. Honcho and Shu reluctantly followed behind.
"One," Shu counted as they ascended towards the fourth step. "Two. Three. Four." Then everything blurred together in a surreal haze.
Valt unconsciously crushed Honcho and Shu's hands in a vice-like grip as he braced himself, then realized he didn't need to. They had arrived.
The trio found themselves standing before a torii gate, the characters for "Misaki" burned into the weathered wood. Shu tapped the gate, looking pensive. "They're really doing their own thing here. Usually a Mystery's boundary depends on local rumors to take shape, but they've completely rewritten the rules to suit themselves."
The endless staircase stretched before them, its steps disappearing into the distance. Honcho's leg cramps flared up just looking at it. Ever cautious, Shu tentatively climbed the stairs, which were littered with all sorts of old and outdated trinkets. Valt reached out and touched an antique telephone floating in midair, his eyes wide with wonder. "Whoa, this is nothing like school!"
Then Valt spotted something that made his blood run cold - a lifeless doll with a black seal with the characters for Four emblazoned on it, slumped in the corner. Sweeping his gaze around, he noticed countless other dolls scattered haphazardly, their long blond hair and purple vests with gold buttons and spiked violet cloaks unsettlingly uniform. Valt gulped nervously, sensing impending doom. Not that it was the first time.
"Hurry up, you guys!" Shu called from ahead. Honcho was wheezing beside a jack-in-the-box that had scared the crap out of him. "Man, this place is seriously messed up," he muttered. Then Honcho had a realization. "Hey, Kurenai, I thought people who stepped on the stairs get shredded to bits. How come we're still in one piece?"
Shu paused, examining one of the dolls with concern. "Well, that's because the shredding happens gradually," he explained, eyeing Valt's terrified expression. "For us Mysteries, it's important that humans learn more about us to fuel our life source. So we have to make the scary stuff memorable, but 4th is really overdoing it this time." Valt made a squeaky sound, his face a picture of fear. Right then, something ringed behind them.
Honcho let out a shrill shriek and leaped into Valt's arms, nearly sending them both crashing to the ground. Shu quickly stepped in and helped steady the pair, grunting with the effort. Valt's gaze landed on a coiled telephone sitting on a nearby table, its shrill ringing cutting through the commotion. Steeling himself, Valt reached out and picked up the phone, his hands trembling.
A high-pitched, unmistakably male voice rang out, sounding prim and proper. "Hello there! It's about time you picked up, servants. I am Misaki, and I want you to find my body."
Valt nearly dropped the phone in shock. Honcho eavesdropped from the side, fuming. "What the hell does that bastard think we are, his maids?! I'm gonna exorcise him with a side of hot oil!" Shu sighed, already anticipating the chaos to come.
The voice continued, "I used to live here with my servants." Suddenly, a random black-and-white film popped up next to Shu, showing a boy in the dolls' outfit ordering people around and handling paperwork. Cracks then spread across the screen, destroying it. "I died right on this spot as I was sliced up, same as the others. The first part you must find is my right arm, which I used to sign my documents."
"Wait!" Valt called out, but the voice interrupted him. "The day will begin soon. Find my arm for me before my work piles up." A large sand hourglass appeared, settling above their heads as the sand flowed down. Beneath it was a mini shrine door, decorated with purple and lilac hydrangeas. Four incense sticks were lit, giving off a faint, flowery scent.
"Um, what do we do now?" Valt said nervously as he stared at the hourglass. "Should we keep going?" Shu shook his head and sighed.
"Nah, we can't," Honcho grumbled. "Every one of them bastards are unbeatable in their turf, present company's stall included. We'll just get ourselves killed if we do. Let's find that damn arm." With that, he dove into a pile of magazines and dolls, practically swimming in the mess he made.
Valt and Shu searched the toy bins for the alleged arm, while Honcho continued rummaging through the clutter. Suddenly, Honcho emerged from the mess with an "Aha!"
Valt rushed over to him. "What? What'd you find-" he cut off abruptly, his expression murderous as he saw what Honcho had discovered. "You wasted all of that time," Valt began, his tone ice-cold as Honcho finally caught on, "to find a BIKINI MAGAZINE?! RANTARO KIYAMA, I SWEAR IF YOU WEREN'T MY BEST FRIEND I WOULD CASTRATE YOU!" Valt flung the telephone straight at Honcho's head, barely missing him. Shu went over to calm Valt down, warily eyeing the offending magazine. The perp himself was scampering away into the clothes bins, hiding in fear.
Shu patted Valt's back soothingly, using his heel to discreetly push the magazine out of sight. "There, there, Valt," he said. "Please don't kill him. He's your friend, remember?" Valt finally stopped struggling, though he still looked quite angry.
Shu dragged Valt over to the scattered pile of doll parts. "We still have to find that arm, though. Who knows what 4th will do if we don't."
Valt grumbled, "Jeez, fine." He started picking up the mismatched body parts, searching for the elusive arm. "Still, what would the arm even look like? I mean, 4th just basically expects us to know? That's a dumbass move."
Suddenly, a book bonked Valt on the head, revealing a page with a relatively normal-looking arm staring up at them. Honcho snickered from the sidelines. "Guess now we do."
"We should split up," Shu proposed. "Then we'd cover more ground and find more pieces that closely match this." He took off to the left, disappearing from view. Honcho somehow leapt up and landed right on the jack-in-the-box, launching himself straight up and off to the right with a scream.
Valt was left alone, staring after them. "Christ," he muttered to himself. "Can't I have a moment of normalcy?" Blissfully unaware, he went back to his task, even as the sand in the hourglass poured down faster.
Valt, Honcho, and Shu regrouped successfully, much to Valt's surprise. Honcho had procured an arm that looked almost normal, save for the paint and dirt smeared across it. Shu presented a robotic arm, while Valt held a dismembered mannequin limb, plucked from a pile of mismatched doll parts.
"Guys, we're supposed to find a normal arm, remember?" Valt scolded. "Honcho, yours is so filthy, I'm shocked you didn't dig it out of a swamp."
"I did," Honcho muttered. "That stupid toy launched me right into a swamp. It was the only one I could find without getting bitten by a fake alligator." Shu wisely refrained from asking for details.
Valt let out an exasperated sigh. "Yours won't work either, Shu. 4th asked for a normal arm, remember? Though I doubt mine's any better." He winced, recalling the gory process of ripping the doll's arm from its socket. Then Valt glanced up and saw the ominous hourglass, his face draining of color. "Shit."
Honcho followed Valt's gaze, his own face paling. "Oh, shit."
The hourglass had run out, a low groan resonating through the realm. Suddenly, the ringing of a telephone pierced the air, and the same ominous voice that had ordered them to find its arm spoke, "You're late. Unless you find my arm before the dolls find you, I suggest you find another place to die." With that, it hung up, leaving the trio to exchange fearful glances.
A swishing sound then reverberated through the air, and Shu was the only one who recognized it. "DUCK!"
A massive pair of scissors came slicing out of the darkness, zeroing in on the terrified group. If not for Shu's warning, Valt and Honcho would've been snipped in half. "Run!" Shu yelled, "Run! We've gotta reach the top or we'll get killed!" Valt and Honcho didn't need to be told twice, scrambling up the steps in a frantic dash for their lives.
"Don't look back!" Shu shouted, but the warning only piqued Valt's curiosity. He stole a glance over his shoulder - and nearly tumbled backwards in terror.
A horde of possessed dolls were in hot pursuit, their lifeless eyes fixed on the trio. The dolls scurried and clawed, desperate to catch up. And raining down from above, a deadly hail of manifesting scissors - slicing, whirring, closing in for the kill. Shu fought valiantly, his spirit regalia deflecting the blades, but the sheer numbers threatened to overwhelm him. Honcho zapped the dolls, but his efforts proved futile against the relentless onslaught.
Valt's heart pounded in his throat as he neared the top. Just a few more steps... Then, a doll's clawed hand clamped around his ankle, yanking him backwards. Valt's scream echoed off the stairwell walls as he teetered on the edge, dangling in the clutches of the demonic toy. His throat constricted, too terrified to even scream. Another scissor zipped at his head, honing itself in for the kill.
Valt heard Shu's panicked scream somewhere in the chaos of dolls. "Hold on, Valt!" Before he could process what was happening, Shu had scooped him up, cradling him in a bridal carry. Honcho frantically swatted the dolls aside as they rushed toward the exit, but then three Kossoris appeared on the final step, each wielding a severed arm.
"Which one?!" Honcho shrieked, zapping the advancing scissors. "How do we know which is the right one?" He caught sight of Shu carrying Valt, his eyes bulging comically. "Uh, I'm not sure what's going on here, but congrats? Oh, and by the way, we're being attacked by killer dolls! Kurenai, any ideas which arm we should grab?"
Shu's face flushed bright red. "Whichever! I don't think it matters at this point - they all look the same!" Valt struggled to hold back laughter and tears at the absurdity of the situation. Just last week his biggest worry was passing finals, and now he was near death with killer puppets and gigantic scissors. The entire situation was ludicrous.
Honcho let out an exasperated "Fine!" In a surprising move, he snatched up all three arms and smacked them against the shrine door. "Whatever! Damn you, you fucking son of a slutty bitch!" he shouted. Immediately after the arms were offered, the shrine door grew until it matched the size of the first, opening into another flight of stairs. The trio gratefully dashed up the new staircase, locking the door behind them and hastily shoving any furniture they could find to barricade the entrance, determined to keep whatever horrors lay beyond from reaching them.
Valt panted, "That was close." He turned to the others, "Can we stop this now? I really don't want to die - if I fail my Math test, I'm pretty sure Phi will drag me back from the dead just to beat me up for not even trying." Honcho chuckled, while Shu's face grew increasingly worried and unnerved. Valt noticed Shu's concerned stare. "Um, Shu, is something wrong? Why were you staring at me? It's just something he says at the start of every class, no big deal."
Honcho nodded. "Yeah, I swear that guy is the most tyrannical piece of shit to ever exist. I have no idea how his hot twin is related to him at all. I mean, Hyde offered to take us all on a ski trip and skip school when we were stuck indoors doing Calc for the winter." Shu smiled tiredly. "I don't know how two people can be so different." Honcho continued ranting, completely ignoring the same telephone voice that had ordered them to find its arm. He even pointedly turned his back on it, fully absorbed in the meaningless conversation.
The voice couldn't take it anymore and gave Honcho's shoulder a firm tap. But Honcho didn't even flinch - he just swatted his fan backwards, sending the telephone flying. Valt watched in bewilderment as the telephone teleported back behind Honcho, now wielding what looked suspiciously like an illegal, electricity-crackling cattle prod (courtesy of Hyde and Evel). The vengeful telephone floated closer, its aura radiating pure rage, the cattle prod inching towards Honcho's oblivious neck. The poor guy had no idea the threat was looming right behind him.
Zap! Poor Honcho lit up like a Christmas tree, getting a jolt from the cattle prod. Valt rushed over, screaming, unsure what to do as Honcho's body twitched. Shu joined him, equally perplexed. "Uh, Shu? Is this... normal? I mean, he just got electrocuted," Valt asked nervously.
"And in rightful retribution," the voice huffed haughtily. "Damn you, you Christ-riding, useless bastard exorcist. You're all nuisances. No matter." The phone ominously picked itself up again, the dial clicking. "Now, you must find my left arm, which I used to direct people. Can you even do it on time, you hella sons of bitches?!"
Shu stepped forward. "It's been a while, 4th-kun. How have you been?"
The voice shifted, tone grim. "The day will begin soon. Find my arm behind my work piles." With that, it hung up, ignoring Shu's question. The hourglass appeared again, sand flowing downward.
Valt shot Shu a pointed look. "Shu, who was that guy? He seems to dislike you. And why the number thing - isn't that rude?"
Honcho snorted in the background. Shu rubbed his temples, unfazed. "We're Mysteries, Valt. He's my colleague, so I know him. He's not fond of me since I'm more powerful. We use numbers for acquaintances, names for friends - it's a respect thing."
"Ugh, can't we just take this guy's yorishiro or something?" Honcho groaned in exasperation. "I'm so sick of this. I swear, I'd rather listen to that Bel kid ramble on about his 'magic powers' than go graveyard diving for random body parts. What's next, are we gonna have to search for his di—"
Zap! Another cattle prod magically appeared and shocked Honcho from behind. Valt couldn't exactly help him, since Honcho had brought this upon himself. The entire realm lit up with Honcho at the center as Valt and Shu got to work searching for the missing arm. Thankfully, they managed to complete the task without any more mishaps.
As they crossed the gate, Shu turned to Honcho. "Oh yeah, Honcho-san. 4th's yorishiro is probably in the deepest, darkest part of his realm, at the very center. So if we make it to the top, I'm sure we'll find it." Honcho groaned, though Valt wasn’t sure whether it was from tiredness or the effects of getting shocked.
So they all continued on, regardless of the tasks set before them.
After enduring 4 more grueling rounds of searching for random body parts, they finally reached the last door.
This door was a stark contrast to the ornately carved and decorated ones they had encountered so far - it was a plain, simple wooden door, the kind one would typically find in a bedroom. As the door creaked open, Valt suddenly had a revelation and mentally chastised himself for not realizing it sooner. "Hey, guys. I just figured something out," he said.
"What is it?" Honcho turned towards him, scowling. "If it's about killing and publicly desecrating 4th, then I'm in. I don't care at this point." Shu wisely opted to stay silent.
"Why did 4th even make us find his body?" Valt questioned. "I mean, he has powers, right? Shouldn't he be able to do it himself? And even if he couldn't, how did he manage to summon us in the first place? What's the point of all this?"
Shu looked thoughtful. "Good point. Though to be honest, I don't really know the answer either. We Mysteries tend to keep these kinds of things private." Honcho stuck his tongue out towards the shrine door.
Suddenly, the door slammed open with tremendous force, nearly hitting Honcho in the face. An ethereal light shone from the doorway, undoubtedly an order to eliminate Honcho for the crime of desecrating its owner. Valt sighed and, with Shu's help, dragged Honcho closer to the door. Still, he couldn't shake the sense of unease as he stepped towards the ominous light…