“How long are you going to be gone, Olivia,” Alex asks as they sit on the couch after putting you to bed.
“I am not sure, Alex,” Liv sighs, pulling Alex close to her, “I am hoping that with this lead, it will only take a couple of days, maybe a week or two.”
“I know it is part of the job, but I hate it when you go undercover. Especially now that we have Y/N.”
“I know, honey, I don’t like going either. This will be the first time I have been gone for more than one night since Y/N was born. I am going to miss you both.”
“Well,” Alex says, moving to straddle Liv, pulling her into a heated kiss, “let me show you just what you will be missing.”
The next morning, Alex was left to get you up and ready for school after Olivia left to start her undercover assignment. They had both decided not to tell you where she was and just to tell you that she was staying at the office to work on a very important case. They should have known you would not accept that answer for too long. Alex is packing your lunch when she calls for you to hurry up before you are late.
“Y/N, come on, baby, we need to leave now, or you’ll be late.”
“I’m coming, Mommy,” you call, running down the hallway with your jacket.
“What do you want for breakfast sweetie? A bagel or a muffin?”
“Where is Mama? I wanted her to braid my hair,” you pout, reaching for your lunchbox.
“She has a really big case, so she went to work early. Bring me the brush, and I will braid it for you, but we have to hurry.”
“Okay, but I want two braids, Mommy, and the chocolate muffin,” you say before running to get your brush.
Alex drives you to school while you talk about the museum field trip you were supposed to take in a few days. When she pulls up to the school, she helps you out of the car, hugs you, and kisses your forehead before reminding you that your nanny will pick you up and that she will see you at dinner. The first night didn’t seem so bad without Olivia, and Alex tries to make it as fun as possible to help keep your mind busy. After dinner, the two of you get in pajamas and curl up on the couch with ice cream to watch a movie. When the movie is over, Alex carries you to bed and reads you a story before tucking you in with a kiss on your forehead and an “I love you baby girl” before she turns out the light. By the third night, you were missing your Mama, and no matter how much she tried, Alex couldn’t appease your questions and avoid the temper tantrum she knew was coming. Alex no sooner walks in the door that night before you run up to her attitude flaring.
“Mommy, where is Mama,” you demand, stomping your foot and crossing your arms over your chest with a frown.
“I told you, honey, she is at the station working on a really important case. She will be home as soon as she is finished with the case,” Alex says, reaching down to ruffle your hair before walking past you to start dinner.
“I want Mama now,” you yell, stomping your foot again.
“Honey, yelling and stomping your foot will not make Mama come home any sooner, but it will get you a time-out.”
“That’s bullshit! Call Mama now,” you yell, kicking the nearby armchair.
“Y/F/N Y/M/N Cabot-Benson, you do not use that language. Go to your room and calm down until I am done fixing dinner.”
“No! Call Mama! I want Mama,” you scream, plopping yourself down on the couch.
“I know you miss Mama, but I will not put up with this attitude, young lady. You have until the count of three to get to your room, or you will have a sore bottom to go with your time-out.”
“No!”
“One,” Alex slowly counts as you stare each other down, waiting for the other to crack.
“Two,” she continues counting, walking closer to where you were pouting on the couch, thinking just how much you looked like Olivia when you pouted. You had inherited her blue eyes, but the dark brown curls and soft dimples were all Liv.
“Three,” she sighs, scooping you up and carrying you kicking and screaming to your room.
When she walks into your room, she sits down on your bed and pulls you over her lap before landing 10 hard, stinging swats to your backside. She stands you back up in front of her and gently wipes away the tears falling down your cheeks.
“I'm sorry, Mommy,” you whimper, burying your head in her shoulder.
“I know this is hard, baby,” Alex soothes, pulling you into her lap and rocking you gently, “I miss Mama too, but behavior like this is not going to help.”
“Can I call Mama to say goodnight,” you ask, sniffing and wiping away your tears.
“I wish we could, baby, but with this case, she can’t really talk on the phone. I know it is hard, but we must put on our brave faces and be patient until she comes home. Okay,” Alex explains, tucking a loose curl behind your ear and drying your cheeks.
You quietly nod your head and tuck it back into her shoulder, snuggling closer than before. The steady beat of her heart and the gentle rocking soothes you, and you are finally able to relax.
“Mommy, I know you told me to take time out, but can I help with dinner, please?” you ask, giving her your biggest puppy dog eyes. I want to stay with you.”
“Okay, here is the deal. We can skip the time out this time, and you can help me with dinner, but if there is any more attitude tonight, not only will you go to time out, I will give you another spanking before I put you there. Do you understand me, young lady,” Alex says in her mommy-means business voice, and you know that if you push her anymore tonight, your bottom will be very sorry.
Later that night, after Alex had tucked you and kissed you goodnight, you woke up from a nightmare. You tip-toe down the hallway and peek inside her bedroom to see her sitting cross-legged on the bed, reading a book. You lean into the door, making it squeak and causing Alex to look up.
“What are you doing out of bed, baby,” she asks, closing the book and setting it beside her.
“Can I sleep with you, Mommy,” you ask quietly as you walk up to her holding up your arms for her to pick you up.
“Did you have a bad dream, sweetie,” Alex asks, picking you up and cradling you in her lap like a baby. You nod and curl into her, sticking your thumb in your mouth. Alex pulls the blanket up to cover you both, gently rocks you, and combs her fingers through your hair.
“Sing, Mommy,” you ask sleepily, on the verge of falling asleep.
“Sure, baby,” Alex says, gently kissing your forehead before clearing her throat and sweetly singing…..
“Baby mine, don't you cry,
Baby, mine, dry your eyes
Rest your head close to my heart,
Never to part, baby of mine
Little one, when you play
Don't you mind what you say
Let those eyes sparkle and shine
Never a tear, baby of mine
If they knew sweet little you
They'd end up loving you, too
All those same people who scold you
What they'd give just for
The right to hold you
From your head to your toes
You're not much, goodness knows
But you're so precious to me
Cute as can be, baby of mine.”
-Baby Mine (Dumbo)
When she finishes singing, she looks down and sees you fast asleep. She adjusts both of you so that she can lie down with you snuggled into her chest and pull your thumb from your mouth. You snuggle deeper into her chest, and she turns out the light before pulling you close and falling asleep herself.
The following days were just as hard on the two of you. Though you tried to have a better attitude and not push Alex’s buttons, Olivia's absence was starting to take a toll on you both. By the morning of your field trip, you and Alex had both had multiple sleepless nights, which left you exhausted and cranky.
“Is Mama coming home tonight,” you ask from the backseat as Alex drives you to school.
“I don’t think so, sweetheart, but I am sure it will be soon. Are you excited for your field trip,” she asks.
“I guess,” you sigh.
“I think you will have a lot of fun. There will be lots of fun things to see.”
“Yeah, maybe.”
“Have a great day, sweetie,” Alex says, hugging you and kissing the top of your head as she helps you out of the car.
“I will,” you reply, running towards the building, knowing full well that if your plan worked, you would not be going to the museum today, at least not for the whole day.
You had spent last night coming up with a plan to get to the station house where Olivia was supposedly working the important case that had kept her from coming home for the 5 days. You had decided that once you got to the museum with your class, you would simply slip away unnoticed and find your way downtown to the 1-6.
You follow your teacher and classmates inside when the bus pulls up to the museum. After walking through the first exhibit, you ask the teacher if you can go to the bathroom. When you rejoin the group you hide behind a small statue until your class moves into the next room, and you then make your way to the exit. As soon as you get outside, the cold wind hits your face, and you realize you should not have left your jacket on the bus, but it is too late now. You turned down the sidewalk and headed toward the park you had seen earlier, hoping you were heading in the right direction. The more you walk, the colder the wind gets, and before you know it, snowflakes start to fall on your face, and you start to wonder if you are going in the right direction. You have been walking forever in a sea of people, some of which ask if you need help or where you are going, and you start to worry that you are lost and will never find the station house. The sky is growing dark and you know that by now the teacher must have noticed you were missing and called Alex or Olivia. You start to shiver from the cold but push yourself to keep walking. When your feet start hurting and your stomach growls, you find somewhere to sit and notice how dark the sky has gotten. You notice a small bench next to the store on the corner. You have only been sitting for a few minutes when you are joined on the bench by a young police officer.
“Hey there, sweetie,” he asks, sitting beside you.
“Hello, officer,” you say, giving him a shy smile.
“What's your name?”
“Y/N.”
“What are you doing wandering the streets all alone without a jacket? You must be freezing,” he says, pulling off his jacket and wrapping it around you.
“Thank you, officer. I am looking for my Mama and left my jacket on the school bus.”
“Where is your Mama?”
“She is at work.”
“What about your daddy?”
“I don’t have a daddy. I have two moms. Mama and Mommy.”
“Okay then, so what about your mommy? Where is she?”
“Probably at work. She had court today.”
“Court?”
“Yes, sir. My mommy is an ADA, and she sends the bad guys to jail.”
“What about your Mama? What does she do?”
“Mama is a cop. She arrests the bad guys that Mommy sends to jail. You're a cop; do you know my Mama? Can you take me to her work?”
“Do you know your Mama’s name and where she works?”
“Yep! She is Lieutenant Olivia Cabot-Benson, and she works at the 1-6 for the Special Victims Unit.”
“I know just where that is. I can take you to find her,” he says, standing up and holding his hand for you.
You take his hand and walk to the police cruiser. He helps you into the backseat before buckling you in. When the door is shut, you hear him say something on his radio before he gets in the driver's seat.
“So, is your mommy Alexandra Cabot-Benson?”
“Yes, sir. You didn’t tell her I was here, did you? She will be very mad that I left my field trip.”
“I just needed to make sure we were going to the right place. We will be there in a little while, okay?”
The ride to the station house seemed to take forever and you realize that you were a lot farther away than you thought, making you glad that you didn’t have to walk all the way. The longer you sat in the car the more anxious you became. Would Olivia be at the station when you got there? Had the cop told Alex you were with him? How much trouble would you be in?
When you finally pull up to the station house the officer helps you out and you hold his hand as you walk in. You can hear Alex yelling all the way down the hall and you can tell she is crying.
“I swear I am going to kill her, Fin. It is bad enough that I haven't been able to see or talk to my wife in a week and that I have no clue where she is but now my daughter is missing. Why has she been gone so long? I can't do this alone. What if something happens to her Fin?”
When you turn the corner you see Alex crying on Fin's shoulder as he tries to comfort her. Fin catches a glimpse of you first as Alex’s face is still buried in his shoulder.
“What do you have to say for yourself young lady,” Fin asks sternly.
“I'm sorry Uncle Fin,” you reply. At the sound of your voice Alex whips around and runs over to pull you into a bone crushing hug.
“What were you thinking young lady,” she says in a raised voice letting you know just how much trouble you are in. “I was scared out of my mind. Don't you EVER EVER do that again. Do you understand me?”
“Yes ma'am. I'm sorry I was just mad at Mama for not coming home. I wanted to yell at her for making us both so sad and tell her to come home,” you explain tears forming in your eyes.
“I don’t care how mad you are at Mama, you know better than to run away or go anywhere without an adult. When we get home you will go straight to the corner for time-out until I calm down and we can discuss your punishment.”
“Yes ma'am.”
“Let's go then,” Alex says coldly, grabbing your hand and pulling you behind her.
“Mommy, are you going to kill me,” you ask, causing Alex to stop dead in her tracks, as tears start streaming down your face.
“Of course not baby,” she says confused as she turns to kneel in front of you.
“Bbbut you tttold Uncle FFFin that you ssswore you wwwould kkkill mmme,” you stutter between sobs.
“Oh baby,” She says, wrapping you in her arms and picking you up, “ I was talking about Mama. I am mad at her too and I said something I shouldn't have because I was angry and scared. I am not going to be killing anyone. I love you and Mama too much.”
“Wwwhy dddid you essay it,” you sob into Alex's neck wrapping your arms tighter around her neck.
“Well it is something that people say sometimes when someone they really love is driving them crazy. They don't really mean it but it lets the other person know that they are upset. Most of the time people laugh after they say it because it is something they know they will never really do.”
“It's not very nice.”
“I know sweetie but you know that I love you and Mama very much and that I would NEVER do anything to hurt you right,” she asks, nudging you with her shoulder to see your face.
“ Yes, Mommy,” you say, moving your head to look her in the eyes and with a slight smirk ask “Does that mean no more spankings cause those hurt.”
“Nice try sweetheart but that is not what I meant and you know it. In fact I think you know that you deserve a spanking today. Am I right,” she asks, putting her forehead against yours.
“Yes ma'am,” you reply, scrunching your face at the idea.
“Hmmmm. Let's go home baby,” Alex says, kissing you forehead before guiding you to rest your head on her shoulder again so she could carry you out of the station.
On the car ride home you wondered just how much trouble you were in. Last time Alex had used the words “discuss your punishment” you had not only been in time out for what felt like hours you had earned a double spanking which meant a spanking from both Alex and Olivia. It was not something you earned very often and had only experienced twice but it was not something you ever was to face again. You knew that running away from school and getting lost in the city was probably something that was deserving of such a punishment but how could you get a spanking from a parent who wasn’t there. You wanted to ask Alex but didn’t want to get in more trouble so you continued to sit quietly and look out the window. When you got home Alex sent you straight to the corner for your time-out while she went to start making dinner. A short time later Alex took a seat on the couch and called you over to join her. As you got closer to the couch you could see the wooden spoon sitting next to Alex and you knew what was coming.
“Alright young lady, do you understand why you were in time-out and why you are going to get a spanking,” Alex asks, holding your hands in hers while you are standing in front of her.
“Yes ma’am. I ran away from my field trip and got lost trying to walk to the station house. I scared you and I broke lots of rules.”
“That’s right and to make sure you understand just how dangerous what you did is your spanking will be on your bare bottom with the wooden spoon.”
“Yes ma’am,” you whisper, hanging your head, “Mommy, am I getting a double spanking cause Mama’s not here.”
“Right now we are going to worry about this spanking. When Mama comes home she and I will discuss it. Okay?”
“Okay. I am really sorry that I scared you Mommy.”
“Thank you baby. Now lets get this over with and then after dinner you can have a bath and we will get in jammies and snuggle on the couch with a movie before bedtime.”
Alex guides you over her lap and bares your bottom before landing 10 hard stinging swats with the wooden spoon. She readjusted your clothes before cradling you as you sob into her chest while she combs her fingers through your hair and comforts you.
“Shhh baby. It's okay, all is forgiven. Shhh take some deep breaths,” Alex says soothingly, placing gentle kisses on your forehead.
Once you have calmed down Alex swings you onto her hip and carries you with her into the kitchen to finish dinner. True to her word after dinner and a bath the two of you curl up on the couch in your pajamas to watch your favorite movie Mulan. After you fall asleep in her arms Alex carries you to your room and tucks you in before going to her own room hoping to finally get some much needed sleep. A few hours later Alex hears the door creak and turns to see Olivia in the doorway.
“I hear you had a pretty scary day,” Olivia asks with a smirk on her face as she walks over to the bed.
“Olivia Margaret Benson if you ever go undercover again I will kill you,” Alex says, sitting up and pulling Olivia in for a kiss.
“ So how is our resident escapee,” Olivia asks with a chuckle, pushing Alex to the bed and kissing her again.
“Sleeping with a sore bottom and that is tomorrow's problem,” Alex says, grabbing Olivia’s shoulder and flipping the so that she was now straddling her, “Tonight I am going to remind you why you never want to go undercover again.”
“Yes ma’am.”