new people & introductions
be there in a flashcard
10:27am
dorcas: hey ??? lol
remus: who are the new people?
and why is this still the groupchat name 😐
it’s not funny or quirky
marlene: i quite like it actually
very punny 😼😼😼
lily: why don’t we all introduce ourselves
you have to say your name, your major, favorite music artist, and a fun fact
i will go first, as an example
hi, my name is lily (though all of you know that)
i am an english lit major with a minor in fem studies, i am a swiftie and proud!!!!! and i can recite the entire bee movie script by heart
marlene: it’s true, i’ve heard it. it’s amazing
dorcas: jerry seinfeld who?
lily: who’s next ????
mary: i guess i will hahaha
i’m mary. i’m a fashion major, i feel like mitski just understands me more than i understand myself and due to some bad decisions on my part i am on a year long ban from any disney amusement park effective until september 25 of next year.
remus: hmmm
i wonder if we have time to unpack all of that
dorcas: i am intrigued
sirius: it’s quite a tale
lily: mary. would you mind indulging us with this so called tale
mary: why yes of course !!!
- it was summer 2019. me, sirius and some of our mates went to disney world in america and did that drink around the world thing.
you know, 11 different countries in the park, 11 different drinks
anyway, by the time we reached italy me and our mate pete were absolutely SLOSHED
like GONE
sirius: we had to carry them for two more countries and they are not the lightest feathers in the pillowcase
remus: lightest feathers…in the pillowcase…
interesting analogy there
sirius: i can’t tell if you’re laughing at my choice of words or at me ?????
remus: why would i be laughing at you, i don’t even know you
sirius: oh
yeah no you’re right
marlene: remus be nice you git 😐
dorcas: always so mean🙄
lily: ANYWAYS
mary, continue
mary: SO me and pete were pissed
and once we got to france, we were under the scorching sun and me and him were already dehydrated
so i was really hot, trying to find a place to cool down
but it was super hot and i couldn’t take it
so i had to lose some layers
marlene: how many layers did you have….
in florida….
mary: one. layer.
dorcas: no….
sirius: yes !!!!!!!!!!
mary: it got so unbearable, i had to take my shirt off
i did. take my shirt off. and it felt so good
obviously wasn’t in the right mind to remember the children surrounding us😁😁
but i was wearing a bralette !!! it honestly looked like a crop top !!!
but i guess some people didn’t think so
sirius: some people meaning the wives of older men who couldn’t stop staring 😁😁
mary: anyways, got pulled aside by some disney cop wannabes and said i was on a year long ban from all disney parks 😍😍😍
remus: this was something
so much to unpack…
lily: mary you are something else, i’m sure you bring the fun
mary: oh i definitely do, thank you for noticing
so introductions…
GO GO GO GO WHOS NEXT
lily: NEXT !
marlene: i’ll go i suppose
i’m marlene, i’m going to school for photography and multimedia. i have a lot of favorite artists but if i had to choose one i choose phoebe bridgers. and fun fact: i am the biggest twilight enthusiast
sirius: omg taste!!
i had all of the books and went to all of the movie premiers and even had the signed soundtrack cd
marlene: THE SOUNDTRACK IS SO GOOD
FOR NO REASON
DO YOU STILL HAVE IT
sirius: YES !!!!
I HAVE THE CD THAT CAME WITH A POSTER OF ALL THE LYRICS
ITS STILL IN GOOD CONDITION, STILL PLAYS AND SOUNDS AMAZING
marlene: YOU HAVE TO SHOW IT TO ME.
WE CAN WATCH ALL THE MOVIES AND LISTEN TO THE SOUNDTRACK
sirius: TWILIGHT MOVIE MARATHON
SOUNDS AMAZING
WE CAN MAKE A DAY OUT OF IT
remus: oh god there’s two of them
lily: no no it’s good.
she won’t bother us anymore
we’re finally free.
anyway, who’s next ???????
dorcas: i’ll go! i quite like introductions.
i’m dorcas!! i’m an english literature major!
my recent obsession has been pinkpantheress and fun fact, hmmm i don’t know. i went to every girl in red show when she was touring europe
remus: makes sense honestly
marlene: omg cas!!! in 2019???
dorcas: 2019 yeah! best month of my life.
why do you ask marls
marlene: i went to the one in charing cross !!!
dorcas: NO WAY?!???
marlene: WAY !!!!!
remus: you guys are so lesbian it’s hilarious
mary: hi mary again. don’t want to interrupt this new revelation but i also went to the one in charing cross :)
marlene: NO WAY ?!?!?!!?!?
dorcas: SHUT UP THATS SO COOL OF US
mary: INNIT ?????
sirius: this is definitely fruity 🏳️🌈
mary: oh i know YOU are not speaking sirius
why don’t YOU go ?????
lily: i agree. you are one of the last two to introduce themselves.
sirius: fine, i was going to volunteer anyway🙄
hiiiii i’m sirius, i’m a studio arts major, i am also a swiftie but also a hoe for hozier and a fun fact i am the number one die hard mamma mia stan
lily: i knew i made the right choice with you sirius
swiftie supremacy ❤️❤️❤️❤️
marlene: omg mamma mia just like someone else in here
he’s actually next in introductions
go ahead remus, introduce yourself
remus: do i have to?
i really do not want to
i don’t want you guys to perceive me, i don’t give you permission
dorcas: our little ray of sunshine ☀️💓
lily: now for that, you have to give TWO FUN FACTS
and make them fun, make them snazzy
marlene: yeah make your facts the adjectives that do not represent your jumper collection 😁😁😁😁
remus: shut up about my jumpers marls
you walk out of the flat like jojo siwa bloody styled you
marlene: HEY
NO JOJO SIWA SLANDER IN THIS GROUPCHAT
I WILL NOT TOLERATE IT❌❌❌
remus: josephine siwa is doing fine, she is somewhere in america with a very sparkly sweater on with loads of money in her account where she can spend it on more sparkly clothing for her, her dog, and her girlfriend. she does not care what i have to say about her.
mary: josephine 😭😭😭
is that even her real name ???
remus: joelle
marlene: why do you know that
lily: i think you’re forgetting the dance moms obsession phase remus had in fifth year
remus: it wasn’t an obsession, i was merely interested
lily: you once bunked off slughorns slug club meeting because it was during the time of the season finale 🤨🤨🤨
remus: IT WAS THE SEASON 6 FINALE I COULDNT MISS IT
sirius: oh is that the one where they lost the finals and abby made them like leave the ceremony 😭😭😭
remus: YEAH THATS THE ONE !!!
ABSOLUTELY RIDICULOUS
mary: how do you know anything about that sirius 🤨
sirius: i dabble in dance moms once in a while
remus: as you should
we all should
dance moms is so good
lily: consider that 1 out of 2 of your fun facts
introduction, go.
now remus.
remus: fine, MOM
i’m remus. english lit major like lils and cas. music artist, idk anything i like in the moment and fun fact um
i like reading ???
lily: wow 😐
dorcas: way to break the ice dude
marlene: you really take after your jumpers remus
bland….
remus: you’ve used the word “bland” to describe my wardrobe only a million times
gifting you a thesaurus for christmas 🥰
marlene: i’d burn it
and send you the remains
remus: you’re evil
marlene: and don’t you forget it !!!! 🥰😍
lily: you guys love each other shut up
since introductions are done, and everyone knows a little something about the other
dorcas: remus excluded
lily: tomorrow shouldn’t be as awkward when the new faces join our study group 😄
dorcas: YAY NEW PEOPLE
marlene: that’s the spirit cas !
mary: lily insisted that we join, we hope that’s okay with everyone
marlene: it’s more than fine
we love new people
remus: well…
lily: oh shut up remus
marls is right, we love new people.
if i have to put up with remus’ bitchiness or marlene and dorcas flirting 25/8 i’m going to lose it
remus: oi ❓❓
dorcas: me and marlene do not flirt 25/8
marlene: yeah just like 6 days out of the week 👩❤️💋👩
remus: i mean at least you guys are aware
sirius: i’m sure mary is thrilled to be with new people
she keeps spending time with me and our male mates, i think the testosterone is affecting her
mary: last night i watched three adam sandler movies back to back
lily: oh god
you’re about to reach your amy dunne era
mary: nah fr
i’m gonna frame them and send them to jail
maybe i’ll get some peace and quiet
sirius: hey😧 i’m not as bad as james and pete
mary: no you’re not
you’re worse
marlene: ELLEMAYOOOO
sirius: worse ?!?!?!?!? how ?!?!?!
mary: BEACAUSE!!! you get them all riled up and once you get them started they don’t stop YAPPING
make me want to rip my bloody hair out
lily: they sound riveting
are they coming to the study sesh ??
remus: no more new people please
i’m still trying to wrap my head around the new people we just met twenty minutes ago
sorry new people
sirius: mmm no you’re not
remus: yeah i’m not 😌😌
dorcas: i’m convinced if none of us made the effort to talk to you remus, you would be by yourself
remus: the dream 😍😍😍😍
lily: oh hush
you love us
now you’re stuck with us
now come on sirius or mary,
add the new people !!!
remus: does he have to ??
i mean this chat is already full
sirius: i’ll do it
just for you remus
remus: gee thanks 😐
[sirius added james and peter to the chat]
lily: i can tell you and remus are going to get along real well, sirius
you’ll become besties by the end of the week
sirius: i’m counting on it ack shully
james: woah what is this??
i don’t know you lot but i’m sirius’ bestie and i’ll go to war for him
remus: no war needs to take place, i don’t want to be his bestie
peter: it’s not the greatest honestly
too clingy
james: PETE!!! you’re here too ?????
peter: yeah except i don’t know what “here” is
marlene: study group !! at the three broomsticks !!
lily: we’re introducing ourselves. say you’re name, major, favorite music artist, and fun fact
it’s your initiation, go.
james: quite assertive
kinda digging it ngl
lily: oh god GO!!!!!!
james: okay okay
i’m james!! james potter. i’m a computer science major, favorite musical artist i have a lot!!! but lets see, paramore, the strokes, oooh glass animals can’t forget them. umm fun fact, i know the entire high school musical choreo !!!
sirius: YEAH YOU DO!!! BEST STUDENT OUT THERE
dorcas: student ????
sirius: yeah student !!! i taught him the dances 🥳🥳🥳
remus: of course you did
james: that’s me!!! pete, you’re up next king !!
peter: hello i’m peter or pete. im a history major and PROUD !!! huge smiths fan, morrisey is great. fun fact, i can make bird noises ???
mary: ah petey boy, our little red flag 🚩❤️
sirius: the flags are red but we’re colorblind 😁
marlene: the bird noises are pretty cool.
you’re like kendall jenner
peter: i wish i was her honestly
sirius: don’t we all
remus: we don’t actually
lily: fantastic !!! now that the introductions are done, we should be more comfy with each other tomorrow at 11:00am !!
the three broomsticks !!
james: sounds good! i’m free at that time. saturday= no class 😎
pete: same
sirius: me too
dorcas: marlene and i our free
remus: idk i’ll have to check
lily: remus i know for a fact you have nothing planned tomorrow
you’re going, i will drag you with me if i have too
marlene: if you don’t go, you’re going to miss the surprise 😼😼
remus: that’s an even better reason not to go
dorcas: surprise?
what surprise??
marlene: i’ll tell you when you come over babes.
james: well now i definitely don’t want to miss the surprise
sirius: hahahahhaahahgahaha
mary: it’s gonna be fun i feel
lily: oh yes it will.
until then, friends 💋
peter: oh mary you told the disney story
mary: HAHAHAHAHAHA
the sexiest people you will ever meet
11:03am
sexy stag: soooooo
what’s the surprise
worm boy: yeah i want to know
the light of your lives: do you not know ??
mary go-round: i swear i told you guys last night
when we were eating ????
sexy stag: when we were eating ?????
you mean when we were completely engrossed in love island 😐
worm boy: oh is that when you mentioned it
no wonder we’re so confused rn
the light of your lives: we figured you guys were listening bc it was a rerun 😭
sexy stag: mate you know we will watch love island like we’ve never seen it before
the light of your lives: should have never introduced that show to you guys
worm boy: the surprise then ????
mary go-round: ahh yes
remus is the name of the bloke sirius had his little run in with yesterday
worm boy: oh THATS him
yeah he’s definitely not the friendliest person
the light of your lives: oh come on he’s not half bad
mary go-round: sirius he was so tired of you the entire time 😭😭
he doesn’t even know it’s YOU behind the screen
the light of your lives: well now he is
sexy stag: OHHHHHH
IS THAT THE SURPRISE ?!?!?!
mary go-round: YESSS HAHAHAHAH
i’m deeply convinced he’s the only one who doesn’t know what’s going to happen
worm boy: he’s going to hate us even more
well not us, probably
just
the light of your lives: no don’t say it
worm boy: sirius
sexy stag: just sirius
the light of your lives: no he’s not
this is my chance to redeem myself
just like lily said
we will become besties by the end of the week
sexy stag: yeah lily
i like her
she seems fit
mary go-round: you’ve literally never met her…????
sexy stag: i know but her words, she’s so nice
the light of your lives: she said three words to you and she was annoyed of you
worm boy: you called her assertive and she was tired of you
sexy stag: mark my words
we WILL be together
so sirius you better not mess this up
the light of your lives: gee thanks for the encouraging words potter 😐
mary go-round: sirius you’ll be fine. just be your wonderful loving self
don’t listen to prongs, he’s just lovesick
worm boy: for some odd reason
over some bird he literally JUST met
i think we should get someone to analyze this
the light of your lives: maybe she’ll reject him so hard he’ll move on
sexy stag: HA!
don’t count on it
who am i if not persistent???
mary go-round: no he’s right
worm boy: dear god, he’s going to make her crazy
mary go-round: JAMES FLEAMONT POTTER YOU BETTER NOT RUIN THIS FOR ME
I ALREADY TOLD SIRIUS, IM TIRED OF HANGING OUT WITH PURE SCHLONGS
the light of your lives: SCHLONG⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️
worm boy: there were many ways you could’ve said you’re tired of living with men
but SCHLONGS????
sexy stag: you truly are something else macdonald
i’m not going to ruin it, i want her too tf 🙄
mary go-round: you better not potter
or else i’ll tell effie about your night at the eagle
the light of your lives: damn
worm boy: big oof
sexy stag: NO-
the light of your lives: she went there
worm boy: bringing out the big guns
sexy stag: YOU WOULDNT
mary go-round: i would
the light of your lives: she would
worm boy: she so would
sexy stag: OKAY
i’ll tone it down for you
and for lily
not for effie
worm boy: 😐
the light of your lives: ur so bad at lying
mary go-round: yeah sure potter
sexy stag: no i promise
i would never do anything to ruin your chance at friendship mary
i know we can be a lot sometimes and too much to handle but you tolerate us and put up with us and i think i speak for all of us when i say we’re so happy to have you as our friend
we’ve definitely grown as a group and i think we have you to thank for that mary
mary go round: christ james
why do you have to be so sweet all the time
if i was into blokes i’d fall in love with you in a heartbeat
the light of your lives: i’m into blokes and im falling in love with him right now 🥺
have been since third year
sexy stag: oh stop you guys are making me blush
padfoot you know id be with you if i didn’t see you as a brother
worm boy: WOW HE JUST BRO ZONED YOU
mary go-round: HAHAHAHAH HE DID
the light of your lives: no no it’s okay
ive known my place for a while
he couldn’t handle me anyways 😌😌
sexy stag: literally what do u mean ??
ive put up with you everyday since we became dormmates?????
the light of your lives: yeah you’ve put up with me living-wise
but you could never handle this libido potter 😼
mary go-round: ew gross
worm boy: sirius is right
swear i did not get a wink of sleep last year because the thumping on my wall became unbearable
ur lucky ur room is on the other side of the flat james
otherwise you wouldn’t be saying that
sexy stag: i couldn’t hear the bed thumping but i definitely ~heard~ other things
you’ve got a mouth on you pads
the light of your lives: in more ways than one 😉
mary go-round: throwing up and gagging and retching
i’m going to go throw my phone in the ocean
bye