Chapter 1
Harry sat quietly on a softly upholstered leather armchair and looked into the crackling stove fire in front of him.
It was already late at night and he had been waiting in anticipation for this moment. The cold autumn wind howled past the closed windows and cracked the floorboards of the hut under its force. It had belonged to an old fool that no longer needed it. A hiding place. Not out of fear but out of cunning, and he was as cunning as he was persistent. There were things that demanded his attention. He wasn't going to stay for long, just until ...
An inkling stirred in him and he sat attentively a little more upright in his chair. His faithful snake Nagini must have noticed it too, as she suddenly lifted her head from her scaly body, darted her tongue and then quietly slipped past his legs into the dusty darkness of the room.
With gentle eyes he looked to the ground and checked his intuition. He listened into himself, reaching in and out beyond, sensing across borders that no one had ever explored before him. He was sure of it, it was time.
With his thin long fingers he pulled the wand out of his cloak and pointed his arm forward.
The sleeve slid down to his elbow as he raised his hand, revealing his pale arm.
Hesitating a moment he sensed into himself again. Yes, there was no doubt, Harry thought and smirked.
With sweeping strokes, he carved brightly shining letters into the midair that remained ominous in the semi-darkness.
"I see you."
♠
Harry woke up screaming and sat bolt upright in bed. He frantically kicked himself free from the covers and pressed his hands against his throbbing forehead.
Next to him, his roommates had jumped up frightened and lit up their wands with concern, some also angry. It hadn't been Harry's first seizure and they were becoming increasingly less tolerant for his issues.
Harry's heart raced and shaken with terror he pressed his fist against his hot-glowing scar as he clung convulsively to the fading images of his dream.
Ron came over with a concerned look and put a hand on his shoulder questioningly to check if everything was okay. Harry's eyes still watered with pain but he looked at his friend and nodded to him as a silent invitation to join him outside.
His roommates were still staring at him and he mumbled briefly "Sorry, had a bad dream." before disappearing from the dormitory with Ron.
♠
Pacing nervously and agitated up and down the quiet common room, Harry tried to sort his thoughts until Ron whispered "Harry, what happened?"
Harry didn't answer right away but went tense to the window and looked at the star-shrouded dark sky. It was a cool autumn night and icy veils blurred the moon to an indistinct glow.
Thick swabs of fog lay over the dark school grounds and only the tips of the trees of the forbidden forest protruded through the thick haze.
He took a few shaky breaths to calm himself down, then exhaled and dropped his head in exhaustion on his arms crossed on the window sill.
Ron came over and tried to get Harry to speak, "It was 'him', right?" he emphasized the word significantly.
Harry looked up, hesitated, and nodded.
"Something happened?" Ron asked cautiously.
Their eyes met for a moment, then Harry avoided his gaze and looked out the window again.
"He punished one of his Death Eaters. He's angry." Harry lied. "Something ... something didn't work out the way he'd hoped it would."
Ron looked relieved, yet unconvinced. "But that's good!" he exclaimed.
"Yes ... yes, I hope so." Harry said, staring unmoved into the night.
♠
It was only when he was back in bed and alone with his thoughts that he found the peace to sort himself out.
Voldemort had made it clear that he knew of Harrys forays into his mind.
Harry stared at the dark ceiling and bit his lip nervously. How long had he noticed him, Harry wondered, and why had he even allowed it in the first place? Why was he revealing that knowledge to him now?
Harry thought faintly of the Occlumency class with Snape. If he had tried harder, he would at least be able to keep him out of his memories. But he hadn't followed the instructions and had never seriously tried to clear his mind before going to sleep. His ability, the connection, felt like a part of him that he didn't want to lock away. The pain was undesirable, but he had welcomed to see what Voldemort was up to, even if Dumbledore disagreed with him and saw the dangers.
He knew it wasn't right to even think it, but he was more concerned about Snape seeing that memory than about what Voldemort might do to him.
With a queasy feeling, Harry snuggled into his blanket and tried to empty his head in an act of desperation.
The next Occlumency lesson was in two days, and he didn't have much hope of learning it by then.
He concentrated on the snoring breathing of his roommates as his thoughts slowly calmed down and drifted into vast nothingness.