Sirius
Sirius sighs and closes the curtains around his bed. He’d just come from the bathroom and was trying to stay quiet since he was pretty sure that it was around two o’clock.
He casts a silencing charm and drops down on the thick blankets. He wants to sleep, he really does, but he just can’t. Sirius isn’t sure if it’s because of the full moon last evening, or the undoubtedly unpleasant letter he got from his mother during breakfast.
His curiosity gets the better of him and he grabs the envelope he had hidden under his pillow. After casting a quick Lumos, he breaks the familiar green seal with his family emblem on it.
Sirius already knows what his darling mother is going to say, he knew it the moment he saw the snow-white owl fly through the windows. He knew it when his friends looked at him, worry and anger clearly visible on their faces. He knew it when he yanked the letter out of the owl’s beak and he knew it when he spelled the owl pink and walked away right during breakfast.
But knowing doesn’t mean the cruel words of his mother hurt any less. And the hurt didn’t stop Sirius from rereading the whole thing over and over again.
It didn’t matter that his mother wasn’t okay with him dating Marcus, a Ravenclaw because he’d stopped caring. Or was trying to, at least. They broke up a week ago anyway, which didn’t matter either, because he only has eyes for one boy. A boy who so happens to be his best friend for the past six years.
Sirius felt like crying at that point. He thinks he might already be crying. He lets go of the letter and touches his face. Dry. That’s weird because he definitely hears someone crying. He wants to let it go but decides against it when the crying turns into sobbing.
He opens his curtains and speed-walks to the bed where the crying is coming from. It’s Remus’ bed. He hesitates, maybe this is none of his business and does Remus just want to be left alone. But the sobbing gets louder and he’s almost screaming.
Sirius casts a lumos again and yanks the curtains open and immediately freezes, Remus is in a fetal position, still sobbing in his sleep. His blanket is shoved down and his stomach and sheets are all covered in blood.
Sirius regains consciousness and casts a quick silencing charm before the others wake up. He knows from experience that Peter is not a big fan of blood, so he would definitely faint from seeing this
He tries calling Remus’ name a few times, but Remus is too far gone to hear him.
He then crawls inside on his knees, closes the curtains, grabs his shoulders and shakes the boy a good couple of times while calling his name. He gets some blood on his hands but he has bigger things to deal with at the moment.
Remus eventually opens his eyes, looks around and eventually looks at Sirius. He doesn’t stop shaking and sobbing, he goes on even harder, in fact.
Sirius has no idea what to do, so he just puts one hand behind the others’ curls and one on the back of his neck and starts rocking back and forth while shushing.
Remus puts his head in the crook of Sirius’ neck and eventually, his breathing slows down. They stay like this for a while, Remus inhaling Sirius’ smell and Sirius wondering where the hell all that blood came from.
“Remus,” he whispers, “why are you covered in blood?”
He doesn’t answer.
“I’m going to take you to our bathroom, okay?”
Still no answer.
Sirius debates going to Pomfrey for a while, but decides against it since he doesn’t know the extent of the wounds. Plus, it’s in the middle of the night and he knows Remus hates himself for giving the woman so much work to do. He untangles himself from Remus and helps the boy stand up.
“Can you walk?” Sirius asked.
Remus nodded shakily, trying to move forward. Just as soon as he takes another step, his knees buckle. He tries to grab something, a wall, the bed, his trunk, anything really, to stop him from falling.
Alas, he grabs air before Sirius catches him, mere decimetres from the ground, and helps him upright.
“S-Sorry,” Remus stutters. “I-”
“It’s okay.” Sirius slips an arm around his waist, careful not to hurt him and helps him walk to the bathroom. “It’s okay, I’ve got you.”
Sirius helps the boy sit on the sink. Remus almost immediately slums against the mirror. Sirius really hopes it’s from fatigue instead of blood loss.
He realises that he’s left his wand on Remus’ bed and quickly rushes to fetch it. When he comes back, he turns on the lights, closes the door and is met with a sight he’s pretty sure he’s only seen on his worst nightmares.
Remus is wearing a shirt that used to white, but has been stained with so much blood, nobody would’ve known it had been white before. And it’s not just his shirt. His arms are covered in it too, as well as his hands, with which he probably had teared at his hair with, since face and hair were coloured also.
“Merlin, what’s happened to you?” Sirius breathes, before casting an accio for some emergency medical supplies he’d kept under his bed, for when some pranks would go wrong.
The medical kit appears and Sirius positions himself between Remus’ legs, before he takes the cold metal scissors and cuts through the once-white shirt, revealing a very deep gash on his stomach.
“Bloody hell.” He swears.
“It, uh- it appears I opened a cut in my sleep,” Remus’ breathing becomes heavier.
“Gee, you think?” Sirius grabs a clean washing cloth from a drawer and pours some water on it, “good thing you told me.”
“Now’s not the time to be sarcastic, Sirius,” Remus hisses.
Sirius tilts Remus’ chin up to get a better look at all the blood coating his face and hair. He delicately thumbs away a streak of blood close to Remus’ mouth, staying silent, only smiling slightly as he looks in the boy’s eyes.
He brushes the blood off of his forehead and cheeks, before moving on to his stomach. He carefully tries to get the blood off, without touching the wound.
It has stopped actively bleeding, but Sirius is sure it could start again with one wrong move.
“Remus, I need to disinfect it.” He isn’t smiling anymore as he retracts the cloth and grabs a labelled bottle that says: ‘alcohol’.
The boy nods and takes the cut up shirt, rolls it up, and stuffs it in his mouth.
Eyes closed, in preparation for what’s about to happen.
Sirius winces at the way his muffled screams echo around in the white-tiled room. He puts the bottle down, takes Remus’ head in his hands, and places his forehead against his. The screams turn into sobs, as he shakes in pain.
“I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry,” Sirius keeps repeating the words, but he’s almost entirely certain that he can’t hear him.
Remus clenches his teeth around the fabric. The room becomes silent, except for the occasional whimper and the constant apologies coming from Sirius.
“You’ll have to stitch it.” His raspy voice breathes. “Just do it quickly.”
Sirius knows he should, but that doesn’t make it any better. He didn’t think anything could be worse than what just happened, but he quickly changes his mind after he pushes the long needle through the skin.
Remus looks like he’s screaming as loud as he can, but no sound escapes his mouth, he just trembles and clenches his eyes.
Sirius tries to give him some encouragement, but nothing he could possible say
Would lessen the pain. It’s incredibly frustrating, not to mention unfair, that injuries caused by werewolves can’t be healed by magic.
After he’s done with the sutures, he lifts Remus’ chin again and tries to get him to drink a healing potion. It’s probably useless, but he feels helpless right now and anything’s better than just standing there, letting him suffer alone.
After it feels like hours have passed, Remus spits out the red shirt and speaks in a raspy voice, “thank you.”
“Is the potion working?”
“Yes.” Sirius knows he’s lying to make him feel better.
“Good.”
Sirius grabs the wet cloth again, and starts to get the dried up blood out of his curls.
“Sirius?”
“Yea?”
“What was in the letter?” Sirius hadn’t expected this. “The letter from your family.”
“Not my family anymore,” he chuckled bitterly.
Remus’ head shoots up, his face now mere centimetres away from Sirius’. “What do you mean?”
Sirius could kiss him now. He’s so close, his eyes look directly at his lips. He’s a bit higher, as he’s sitting on the front of the sink. If only they weren’t talking about his ‘family’.
“I got disowned. I’m no longer a Black.”
“Why?” He sounds surprised.
“Where do I even start-” Sirius snorted. “Being a gryffindor, not being a deatheater, dating a boy.”
“You got disowned for dating Marcus?”
“No, we broke up before that. Just for being gay in general.”
“You guys broke up? Why?” He seemed genuinely surprised. He shouldn’t be, almost anyone who knows him, is aware of the fact that he only has eyes for his best friend. Even Peter, who is usually quite oblivious.
“I- uh, I liked someone else.” Sirius is itching to tell Remus it’s him. It’s him he likes. He’s still so incredibly close to him. If it were any other day, Sirius would be able to smell the chocolate and tea smell, he’s always got hanging around him. Unfortunately, the only thing Sirius can smell is the metallic scent of the blood he was cleaning up.
“Oh,” he breathed.
“Yeah.”
He can’t do this. Now when he was just pouring alcohol over his wounds, not when he had just practically stabbed him with a very long needle. He’s not ready to lose one of his best friends. What if he didn’t feel the same way? Just because he was very supportive of him when he came out, doesn’t mean he was interested in him. James was supportive too and he’s probably dreaming about Lily right now. He just couldn’t take the risk.
He looks up in those amber eyes for one more time, savouring it, because he knows this could very likely be the last time they’re this close.
“I’m gonna, uh. Gonna get you a- a new shirt,” he rambles. “You must be cold, sitting there, uh, half- half naked.” He steps away cursing his inability to form a half decent comprehensive sentence.
“Sirius, come here.” Remus’ voice was low and rough, probably from all the screaming, Sirius figured.
He turns around and steps closer to Remus, still sitting in the same position as before.
He takes one step closer and Remus leans forward to grab his black shirt. He pulls and Sirius stumbles even closer, to the point where he’s back between Remus’ legs again. He inhales sharply, remembering he wouldn’t want to open up his wound again, but whatever he has on his mind seems to be more important, since he ignores the pain and focuses on Sirius’ eyes.
Remus brushes a strand of his black hair away from his face and tucks it behind his ear, he then moves his hand to cup Sirius’ face.
He’s so close, he can feel his warm breath on his face. So close he could count every light freckle covering his cheeks and nose.
“Tell me why you broke up with Marcus.” He breathes.
“Because I like you.”
Remus’ other hand comes to cup the other side of his face.
“Can I kiss you?” He whispers.
“Please-” anything Sirius was about to say, has completely vanished from his mind. The only thing he can focus on is Remus. Remus’ surprisingly soft lips. Remus’ rough hands moving to grab his hair as he deepens the kiss. Remus’ tongue inside his mouth. Remus’ little whimpers and moans, that aren’t made out of pain for once. Remus’ hand forming a fist and pulling his head back, exposing his neck. Remus’ lips on his neck. Remus, Remus, Remus, Remus…
And they lived happily ever after and no one died.