Out of Gas
“Which one you figure tracked us?” Serenity’s captain asks his first mate.
“The ugly one, sir,” the woman answers without missing a beat.
The captain starts to nod, then glances at her. “Could you be more specific?”
Harri snorts.
Jayne glares at her.
“Do we look reasonable to you?” Marco, their idiot captain asks.
“Well, looks can be deceiving,” the other captain shrugs.
“Not as deceiving as a low-down, dirty deceiver,” Jayne responds.
Harri resists the urge to bury her face in her hands.
“Well said,” the other captain placates. “Wasn’t that well said, Zoë?”
“Had a kinda poetry to it, sir,” Zoë agrees.
“You want I should shoot ‘em now, Marco?” Jayne asks.
“Wait ‘til they tell us where they put the stuff,” Marco commands.
“That’s a good idea.” Jayne nods and waves his gun. “Good idea. Tell us where the stuff’s at, so I can shoot ya.”
Harri gives up on any modicum of dignity and buries her face in her hands with a groan.
The captain at gunpoint raises his hand. “Point of interest? Offerin’ to shoot us might not work so well as an incentive as you might imagine. Anyway… we’ve hidden it. So, you kill us, you’ll never find it. “
“Found you easy enough,” Jayne counters.
The captain’s expression turns considering. “Yeah, you did, didn’t you? How much they payin’ you?”
“Huh?”
“I mean, let’s say you did kill us. Or didn’t. There could be torture. Whatever. Somehow, you found the goods. What would your cut be?”
“Seven percent, straight off the top,” Jayne answers matter-of-factly.
“Seven? Oh.”
“What?!”
“Hm? Nothin’.”
This captain is playing Jayne like a bloody fiddle and Harri is living for it. Brief eye contact with the first mate, Zoë, indicates she’s amused as well. Harri reckons she already knows they’ve won this battle. Not that Harri’s putting up a fight - Marco is a pig.
“Not a thing,” the captain continues. “No, I just. Does that seem low to you?”
“It does, sir,” Zoë agrees.
“That ain’t low!” Jayne protests.
“Stop it!” Marco snarls.
“Seven percent is standard,” Jayne says.
“Okay,” the captain laughs. “Zoë, I’m payin’ you too much.”
“Why?” Jayne demands. “What does she get?”
“Knock it off!” Marco calls, desperately grasping for control of the situation.
“Look, forget I said anything,” the captain shrugs. “I’m sure you’re treated very well. Get the perks. Got your own room.”
Jayne’s expression drops.
The captain puts on a sympathetic face. “No? You share a bunk?”
“With that one,” Jayne jerks his chin toward the idiot they’re stuck rooming with.
“Really?”
“Hey!” Marco snaps. “This ain’t funny!”
“Yeah,” Jayne agrees. “I ain’t laughin’.”
The captain goes in for the kill. “You move on over to this side, we’ll not only show you where the stuff’s at, we’ll see to it you get your fair share. Not no sad seven.”
“Private room?” Jayne presses.
Marco whips around. “Jayne!”
“Your own room,” the captain confirms. “Full run of the kitchen. Whole shot.”
“Jayne,” Marco glares. “I ain’t askin-”
Jayne shoots Marco in the leg, “Shut up.” He lifts his gun to their other crewmate without shifting his gaze away from the captain. He jerks his head back toward Harri. “We’re a package deal. How big a room?”