Stupid face
The flat was chaos.
Mapi leaned against the wall of the living room, hands on her hips, as she watched Ingrid stumble around the sofa. The Norwegian was barefoot, her heels abandoned somewhere near the door, and still wearing the fitted black dress she’d worn to the team’s fancy dinner earlier that evening. It clung to her tall frame, the material shimmering slightly under the dim light of the flat. She’d been composed and elegant at the event—at least until someone (probably Frido) had decided tequila shots were a good idea.
Now, however, Ingrid was the furthest thing from composed. She was giggling uncontrollably, her eyes sparkling in a way that told Mapi she was far too gone.
“Maríaaaa,” Ingrid slurred, spinning on the spot and nearly falling over in the process. She reached out to steady herself on the sofa but missed entirely, toppling onto the cushions instead. “Why’s the room moving? Stop the room!”
Mapi covered her mouth to stifle a laugh. “The room’s not moving, Princesa. You are.”
Ingrid propped herself up on one elbow, her hair a wild mess around her flushed face. “I’m fine,” she announced with exaggerated confidence, though the wobble in her voice betrayed her. She tried to stand but failed miserably, flopping back onto the sofa. “The floor hates me.”
Mapi shook her head, grinning despite herself. “No, the floor’s fine. You’re just drunk.”
“I’m not drunk,” Ingrid argued, waving a hand dismissively. “You’re drunk.”
Mapi raised an eyebrow. “I’ve had one glass of wine.”
Ingrid pointed a wobbly finger at her. “Exactly. Lightweight.”
Mapi chuckled, shaking her head as she walked over to where Ingrid lay sprawled across the sofa. “Alright, that is enough. Hora de dormir”.
“Nooooo,” Ingrid whined, rolling onto her stomach and hugging a cushion tightly. “I like it here. It’s soft. I’m staying here forever.”
Mapi sighed, crouching down to look at her. “You can’t sleep here, Princesa. You need to get out of that dress and into bed.”
Ingrid gasped dramatically, her eyes wide. “Are you saying you don’t like my dress?”
“I love your dress,” Mapi said patiently, though she was fighting to keep a straight face. “But you’re not sleeping in it. Now come on.”
She reached for Ingrid’s arm, but the Norwegian batted her away, laughing like it was the funniest thing in the world. “No!”
“Por favor, Ingrid,” Mapi said, switching to Spanish in an attempt to coax her. “Te sentirás mejor una vez que estés en pijama”.
Ingrid ignores her.
Mapi snorted, crossing her arms. “You’re impossible. Fine. Stay there, then. I will just go to bed without you.”
She turned to leave, but barely made it two steps before Ingrid shot upright. “Wait! María, no!”
Mapi paused, glancing over her shoulder. Ingrid was staring at her with wide, panicked eyes, like a puppy afraid of being left behind. It was ridiculous and adorable all at once.
“Don’t leave me” Ingrid murmured, her voice softer now, almost pleading.
Mapi sighed, walking back to her. “I’m not mi amor. Come on.”
Somehow, she managed to get Ingrid onto her feet, though the taller woman leaned heavily against her for support. Leading her down the hall to the bathroom was like herding a very drunk, very tall sheepdog. Ingrid stumbled more than once, nearly knocking into the walls, and Mapi had to steady her with an arm around her waist.
Once inside the bathroom, Ingrid immediately made a break for the toilet, sitting down on the closed lid with a triumphant grin. “I like it here. It’s my throne.”
Mapi rolled her eyes, grabbing her toothbrush and some toothpaste. “Sit still, Princesa. I’m brushing your teeth.”
Ingrid blinked at her, her expression suddenly serious. “Why?”
“Because I do not trust you to do it yourself right now,” Mapi said, squeezing some onto the brush. “Open.”
Ingrid obediently opened her mouth. Mapi leaned forward, gently cupping Ingrid’s cheek before carefully beginning to her teeth. No more than four seconds pass before Ingrid suddenly pulled back, her eyes wide.
“I like your stupid face,” she blurted, her words muffled by the toothbrush in her mouth.
Mapi froze, blinking in surprise. “Qué?”
“It’s so stupid,” Ingrid continued, her green eyes glassy but sincere. “It’s so… I like it. Can I touch it?”
Mapi choked on a laugh, nearly dropping the toothbrush. “Eres ridículo.”
Ingrid grinned, like she already knew this fact but simply didn’t care. “But can I?”
Mapi rolled her eyes, giving a small nod. “Fine. Just sit still, sí?”
Ingrid immediately reached up, cupping Mapi’s face with both hands. Her palms were warm, her touch surprisingly gentle as her thumbs brushed over Mapi’s freckled cheekbones. “You’re so pretty,” she mumbled around the toothbrush. “I like you.”
“I would hope so,” Mapi said dryly, though her cheeks were flushing despite herself. She finished brushing Ingrid’s teeth as best she could, then stepped back, pulling the taller woman to her feet.
“Okay, time to get your makeup off.”
Ingrid pouted, but Mapi ignored her, grabbing a makeup wipe and pinning her against the bathroom counter with her hips to keep her from wandering off. Ingrid didn’t protest, though her hands found their way to Mapi’s waist, holding her there.
“You’re so bossy,” Ingrid muttered, though there was no real bite to her words.
“And you’re a mess,” Mapi shot back affectionately, wiping gently at Ingrid’s face. “Hold still, Princesa.”
Ingrid complied, though she continued to watch Mapi with a soft, almost dazed expression. Once the makeup was gone, Mapi stepped back, tossing the used wipe into the bin.
“Alright, come on,” she said, turning to leave the bathroom. “Bedtime.”
Before she could take more than a step, she felt Ingrid’s arms wrap around her waist from behind. “No,” Ingrid whined, burying her face in Mapi’s shoulder. “Stay here.”
Mapi sighed, patting Ingrid’s arm. “Princesa, you need to sleep.”
Ingrid mumbled something incoherent, but Mapi was having none of it. She turned in Ingrid’s arms, crouched slightly, and hoisted the taller woman over her shoulder with surprising ease.
Ingrid yelped in surprise, her arms flailing for a moment before she went limp. “Maríaaaa,” she whined, her voice muffled by Mapi’s back. “What are you doing?”
“Taking you to bed,” Mapi said matter-of-factly, carrying her down the hall with ease.
For a moment, Ingrid was still, but then Mapi felt a sharp smack against her backside.
“Did you just slap my butt?” she asked, stopping mid-stride.
“It was right there,” Ingrid said unapologetically, though she was clearly trying not to laugh. “What was I supposed to do?”
Mapi rolled her eyes, resuming her trek to the bedroom. “You’re lucky you’re cute.”
She deposited Ingrid onto the bed, helping her change into some pyjamas before pulling the covers up over her before sliding in beside her. Ingrid immediately curled into her side, resting her head on Mapi’s shoulder and wrapping an arm around her waist.
“You’re the best,” Ingrid mumbled sleepily, her eyes already starting to close.
Mapi smiled, pressing a kiss to Ingrid’s hair. “Y tú eres un puñado”.
Ingrid hummed contentedly, her voice barely audible as she whispered, “I like your stupid face.”
Mapi chuckled, wrapping her arms around Ingrid and holding her close. “I like yours too, Princesa. Now go to sleep.”
Within minutes, Ingrid was out cold, and Mapi couldn’t help but smile as she watched her. Ridiculous as the night had been, she wouldn’t have traded it for anything.