Days After Death

I know what he’s trying to say, but the snake was coincidental. Monrow didn’t have any sort of Death Eater paraphernalia on him, and the tattoo Civers had wasn’t only not moving but looked completely different from the original Dark Mark. Her brand was further placed on the wrong arm and was too far up to be in the right spot (forearm, if I’m not mistaken).

“Lily!” Nellie calls, already slurring. Merlin, this girl was a lightweight. “What’s taking you so long?”

“Merlin, please do not tell me you’re going to be one of those people who will let work completely rot your brain,” Faridah complains. Lily doesn’t have to look at her to imagine Faridah, her legs stretched over the top of Rick’s, beer bottle in hand, scowling at Lily as if writing letters is a personal slight against her. “Please, I don’t want you to become boring.”

Lily sighs and looks up from the letter she’s about to finish. Sure enough, her friends are right where she envisions them to be. Rick and Faridah are most definitely cuddled up, drinking but sober, Libba, only slightly drunk, holds her cards close to her chest, and toes Nellie, who for some reason is on the floor, cards facing the ceiling, grinning at nothing. How one can get so insanely blasted from a mere drinking game– that they were only halfway through– was beyond her.

“Sorry, it’s just been bugging me all day,” Lily sighs. “I’ll finish up real quick and send it through tomorrow.”

She turns back to it as Faridah groans something.

I know what Head Auror Potter believes, but I have brought this up with him. I will continue to do so. For now, I hope my writing to you serves as my surety on the matter.

With sincere thanks,
Auror Lily Potter.

Lily knows she should probably write in code on such a confidential matter, but she isn’t planning on sending the letter via the Ministry. She’s planning on abusing her familial relations with the Minister herself. So what?

Meanwhile, Libba snorts.

“You shouldn’t write to the Minister when you're half-intoxicated,” she teases. “It’s bad etiquette.”

Lily laughs, folding the parchment up and putting it in her pocket, so she can’t forget it.

“I’m worse with a hangover, trust me.”

Of course, Lily isn’t exactly planning to get so drunk she’ll feel it the day after, but she did have a knack for getting carried away when hanging out with certain people. Those certain people being her very evil friends who liked to impose their very evil influences on her.

Lily humours the thought for a moment, before walking back to where her friends inhabit Nellie’s couch. She’s only just sat down when Faridah has put a soju and strawberry in her hand.

“Get drunk,” Faridah orders, throwing her cards and the rest of the game away, which almost causes Lily to snort as she sips her drink.

“I can’t, I’m a working woman now,” Lily says, and Libba sighs.

“Don’t tell me you’re going to be like this forever,” she says.

“What did we expect? She’s only been banging on about being an Auror since fourth year,” says Rick, combing a freckled hand through Faridah’s dark brown hair. Libba scowls and looks away, though Lily is sure she’s the only one who notices it. Things have been tense for a while now between Libba and Faridah, ever since Ricky dumped Libba for her. Faridah has always had such a well-maintained, calm disposition, but Libba can be so obvious about it that sometimes Lily truly has begun to believe that they’re ignoring the signs on purpose.

Nellie giggles, oblivious, her blue eyes glazed over and fixed on the ceiling. Her lilac nail polish flashes as she taps her pale fingers against the red carpet she lies on, her blond hair splayed around her like a halo.

“Banging,” she repeats.

“Whatever,” Libba says shortly, ditching her deck to gesture to the twisted, folded letter that has been lying on the coffee table, now surrounded with empty glasses and a half-full bottle of vodka, cranberry and orange juice. “Can we talk about this though?”

Faridah frowns.

“What is there to say?”

“What do you mean?” Libba says, overdramatic as always. Lily watches with amusement as her gesturing to the letter gets more aggressive. “I just don’t understand why they want to have a reunion party now, of all times.”

“Why not?” Lily asks. “It’s not like it’s Hogwarts official. Isn’t this just some random inviting a bunch of people from our year?”

“Have you been listening to anything I’ve been saying? Not just some random, randoms, plural.”

“And I think they’re trying to invite everyone they can,” Rick sighs, rubbing his temples.

“Yeah, and the invite did tell us that it was specifically a reunion for the whole year.”

“No, that doesn’t make any sense,” Lily dismisses, trying to ignore her pragmatic mind warning her that there is way too much alcohol in what she is drinking. Did Faridah mix her drink?

Libba narrows her eyes at her.

“Are you going to explain or something?” she asks.

“What do you mean? I didn’t get an invite, so obviously they’re not inviting everyone,” Lily shrugs. She’s nonchalant about it until she takes a look at the rest of her friends, simply staring at her. Even Rick looks surprised, with one pierced brow raised high, and Lily hardly ever sees emotion on his face. “What? What is it?”

“We all got an invite is what,” Faridah says, looking more confused than Lily feels.

Lily is about to reply that it doesn’t matter. That it’s just a dumb party. But if that person really wanted to invite everyone they knew, there was no way she wouldn’t get an invite too. She was the most famous person in their year. Unless it got lost somewhere upon arrival…

But then Nellie snorts, playing with the hem of her shirt riding up just above her stomach.

“Ohhhh,” she grins, “what a bitch.”

Libba giggles along, and Lily watches with a cold, sinking feeling as Faridah and Rick share a grin. She lets them have their moment for a few seconds, trying to tell herself not to seem too pathetic about it, but she breaks anyway.

“Who?” she demands. “Who’s a bitch?”

“Relax,” Faridah waves a hand at her. “It’s Adeline Finnigan-Thomas. Remember her?”

The sinking feeling only seemed to double now. A familiar, round face intrudes upon her consciousness, a smiling girl with glasses too big for her face, bangs she hated, and a lisp she despised encroaching on her mind. Lily tries to push her away, but the memory is stubborn.

“Of course I remember her,” Lily says, distant.

“Yeah, well. She was the one who sent all of these invites.”

No. She wouldn’t.

“Oh my god, we have to go now,” Rick snickers. “Lily will pop her head.”

“No I won’t,” she snaps at him, with more bite than is needed. She puts down her soju glass, suddenly agitated. “I’m not gonna go if I didn’t get an invite.”

“You are getting boring,” Faridah frowns. “Lily two years ago would’ve gone anyway. She didn’t care if someone didn’t like her.”

Lily knows she would’ve been just as gutted two years ago as she is now. Adeline and her used to be best friends before Lily had become truly nasty to her. Even she could admit that.

It’s not something Lily likes thinking about, so she tries not to as much as she can help it. But even she knows she can be downright rancid, especially now that she’s grown and can reflect on her youth.

Adeline and she had been vague friends before Hogwarts, only really playing with each other when her parents had invited her dads over for dinner. When they discovered they were to be in the same year, they had made a pact to sit with each other during the train ride over to Hogwarts, for Adeline had always been a shy girl, and Lily had always wanted to help others in whatever ways she could. Then they had both been sorted into Gryffindor, and their friendship took off from there.

They did things most girls their age did. Snuck into the kitchens for late-night snacks, debated their controversial opinions on popular people in the school, hate-watched movies together, teased each other about the boys they liked.

Lily had always known Faridah, Rick, Libba and Nellie, but she hadn’t always liked them, because they had never liked Adeline. One could guess where that went, looking at all of them now. She’d like to say it was a narrative more than stereotypical, but it wasn’t. These four were louder, funnier, prettier and more popular. They showered Lily with attention she didn’t know existed. Hanging out with them felt like she was more than the celebrity she already was. They were more alike than Adeline and she had ever been, but they tended to have a cruel streak that existed even today, something Lily could never talk them out of.

Of course that meant burning some bridges back in school. Adeline stopped coming over to her house in the summers, they stopped being potion partners, and Lily watched as she withdrew from others too.

It wasn’t as if Lily hadn’t tried to reconnect with her since her third year. She specifically remembered apologising in fifth year, when Gryffindor had just won the Quidditch Cup and they had celebrated in the common room, where Lily had gotten drunk and emotional on Firewhiskey. She had sought Adeline out, and most embarrassingly (according to Libba, who was unfortunately there to witness and laugh at it all), had spewed out an apology to her, lamenting about old memories and all that. There was another time in seventh year when Lily had tried to reach out to Adeline before they graduated.

Lily couldn’t remember Adeline ever being mean or disgusted with her attempts. In fact, the other girl had seemed quite welcoming and polite about it– always accepting her apologies and assuring there was no bad blood between them yet never taking Lily up on any plans to heal the damage that had been done.

Which is fine. Adeline isn’t obligated to be best friends with Lily again. Lily isn’t even sure how that would work considering her mates all hate her guts, but at least there had been no hostility between each other. She had always held a soft, tender spot for Adeline, and sometimes when her mates were being extra tossers she wished for her friendship back. That happened more than Lily would ever admit aloud to any of them. It was shameful, anyway.

Now she’s confronted with the fact that Adeline could’ve just been playing nice with her, which is exactly what Faridah had been insisting she was doing for years, yet Lily had always brushed it off as a deterrent for her to keep pursuing Adeline.

“Told you she was a bitch,” Faridah says now, flipping her thick dark hair over a shoulder. “Don’t be sad about it, the reunion would be lame if she’s one of the hosts anyway.”

“You know, I always thought she was some devout Christian girl or something,” Nellie murmurs on the floor. “Because she acts all uppity, you know? Like, she wouldn’t even drink any alcohol, or stay up late or anything, and normally that’s because people like that are super religious. And you know how religion ruins fun.”

“I don’t think you can say that,” Faridah scowls at Nellie, who only smiles wistfully.

“Anyways, that can’t be true. Remember I caught Adeline fucking Linnaea Scamander in seventh year? Like, in one of those dirty storage cabinets?” Nellie laughs. “What kind of Christian would do that?”

Before Nellie can lunge for the vodka bottle again (it’s unfortunate how common she’ll say something disgusting and blame it on the alcohol the morning after), Lily interjects with a warning tone, “I’m pretty sure he goes by Lysander now.”

“What a stupid name,” Rick snorts, and Libba is quick to agree with a resounding cackle that makes Lily wince at the desperateness of it.

“Oh, yeah, forgot about that,” Nellie hums, playing with her hair. “But, I mean, it’s totally on brand for Adeline to be a secret lesbo.”

“Shut up, Nel,” Lily snaps, reaching down to move the vodka away, as well as her empty glass that stinks of Midori. “You’ve had enough.”

Nellie frowns at Lily but doesn’t try to stop her. She’d probably just embarrass herself more if she did.

Lily starts moving the empty glasses to the sink, her skin feeling itchy. She always needs to be doing something when she gets uncomfortable, and the nauseous wooziness of guilt (a feeling she doesn’t truly understand why she is experiencing) moulds itself into a hard stone that sinks and rests at the bottom of her gut. Years ago, this would’ve made her angry.

“Ah, Lily,” Libba smiles at her with her classic air of condescension. When Lily gets like this, everything seems to be out to purposely annoy her, but her friends, luckily, still cannot tell. “You’re too much of a good person. I don’t know why you always feel the need to defend this girl who so obviously hates you.”

Her words are like a stab to the gut, but Lily swallows down her hurt. Her friends aren’t malicious, just a bit stupid is all.

“I’m not defending her,” Lily says instead, moving back to the couch even though she longs to just go home and sleep all of this off. “I’m confused too. I didn’t think we were on bad terms.”

“She’s just jealous of you is all,” Rick waves at her. “Girls can be bitchy like that.”

This earns a well-deserved smack from Faridah, but Rick only grins and nips at her ear. Libba looks positively sickened at the sight, and Lily’s pity is dulled by her exhaustion. Maybe it’s her new job– the stress her dad’s been going through with this new case and his stubborn desire to connect everything back to Voldemort– but Lily finds she can’t stomach being around Faridah, Rick, Libba and Nellie for too long. Everything they do just seems to annoy her at some point or another.

It’s just work stress, Lily reasons. I need to learn how to adapt to juggling everything.

So she plasters on a smile and says, “I think you guys should go to this thing. Don’t worry about me.”

“Nuh-uh, you’re coming.” Faridah points a finger gun at her. “You know you want to.”

Lily hesitates. Would Adeline hate her more if she came uninvited? Why does it even matter? It’s been years anyway.

“When is it?” Lily asks hesitantly.

“End of the month.”

“Well, I can’t do the 31st.”

“It’s the 30th, actually.”

Libba smacks her lips together, thrusting a glass out to her, the bronze drink inside sloshing over the rim a little.

“You know who would probably come if I asked?” she says, trying to be absentminded about it and failing miserably. “Axel.”

Axel. Her on-and-off boyfriend, who was an absolute tosser, who her father and older brothers hated and who her mother despised– who she couldn’t help but keep coming back to.

He had dumped her for a younger blondie fresh out of Hogwarts. It had made Lily so pissed that she had refused his rebound advances for a total count of four times– a record for them. And it wasn’t like she was planning on getting back together with him at the reunion party. She just wanted to make him jealous is all. Maybe a little horny. And very, very angry. Perhaps she could pick up some attractive bloke the day of just to swing him on her arm in front of Axel. He was always annoyingly possessive of his women.

“Okay,” she agrees, trying to sound like she put some rational thought into it.

By the unsurprised look of her friends, she has failed horribly. Libba smirks at her. Rick halfheartedly tries to hide a snicker under his hand. At least Lily has enough forethought to feel humiliated by it.