With OWLs rapidly approaching, most students could be caught scattered across the building with text books in hand. Slumped against walls, using book bags as pillows. In the library, just "resting their eyes" against the bookshelf for a moment. Even the great hall filled with snores and kids jolting awake as they realize they're slobbering all over their required text or breakfasts. Friends were now more often found chatting about Witch Hunts of the 14th century and moonstone than the newest gossip, though there were a few hours you could see it around again. They hadn't completely forgotten how to be kids. My best friend, Lily Evans, and I took advantage of hours like this, usually late at night when we were supposed to be in bed.
Tonight was no different, though we weren't alone. Sprawled across common room furniture, papers becoming a new carpet beneath him, rested Remus Lupin, clearly exhausted from expansive studying once again. The two of us giggled at the sight, taking the seats Remus had not been using for texts or his gangly limbs to complete our daily catch up. Lily is on about something or another about Emmeline Vance, I think about her being a show off in Defense Against the Dark Arts. I didn't catch much of it.
"Y/n? Y/nnnn? Earth to Y/n?" She says from beside me, waving her hand in front of my face until I snap back into reality. "Hello? Whatcha thinking about?"
"I just- its a bit chilly in here, don't you think?"
"A little. Wanna go upstairs?"
"No, no. I'm fine, it's...I don't think he will be. He looks cold." I mumble, nodding over to Remus, who had shifted a bit in his sleep, tucking one arm into the crook of the other, hiding half of his face and looking utterly pitiful and drained.
Lily agrees with my thoughts, and continues to talk about Emmeline while I stand and grab a quilt from a nearby closet, draping it carefully over the sleeping boy, who readjusts again. I think I hear him mutter a quick "cheers", making my eyes practically bulge out of my head with the thought he knows it was me. I can feel my ears turning a deep pink, matching my cheeks as I rejoin Lily.
"...and of course she's amazing but, seriously, is it really necessary to swish your hair like that? We're here to learn, not to flaunt, and eve- y/n! You're not listening again!"
"Sorry, sorry. So she was doing the spell fine?"
"Yeah, it was great." Lily rushes, eyeing me up and down. I could feel her eyes scanning me, though I was still positioned to face Remus on the couch. "Alright, spill."
"Am I allowed to look at him like that?"
"You're just making sure he's fine, right? Nothing wrong in that."
"No- he- he's just so nice to look at."
"Uh oh, does mr Lupin have an admirer?" She giggles, making me blush even harder. Remus, again, tosses on the couch, worrying me that he'd woken up to the sound of his name. Both of us let out a deep sigh of relief when he doesn't. "Come on, tell me everything!"
"He smells like old books and ginseng. I can almost bet he tastes like chocolate and tea."
"Y/n!" Lily was close to booming this, settling herself down at the realization. "Sorry! Didn't realize you thought about how he would taste, you minx. Are you guys close?"
"Not terribly. You know I'm friends with Peter, and he's friends with Remus. I guess i'd first heard of him...yeah. You would find him on a map with a pseudonym."
"I heard Potter mention a map once, you're going to have to tell me more about that later. Back to your little crush, now."
"That's the problem, it's not little. He-He could mean everything to me, Lily."
We laugh some more at my undying infatuation, my eyes barely leaving him, only a couple times to gauge her reaction. Knowing this conversation will last most of the night, we pick up a game of chess as well. Somehow, Lily's developing crush on Potter comes up after my feelings for Remus.
"I really might be at the breaking point. Next time he asks could be the one, you know?" She says, moving her bishop to e3, blocking my next planned move. She notices. "Mm, can't make your move now. At least not in chess..." Lily hints, raising her eyebrows at Moony.
"No, I couldn't. I'd never tell, not ever say a word about it, Lily. Especially not to him."
"Y/n, doesn't it ache? He's right there, so close, yet so, so far!"
"Yeah, it's oddly good to hurt if the other option is to confess. I'll be okay admiring from afar."
"You guys could start as better friends, then. You said it yourself, even sitting next to him you could not be more far apart. Just, you know, plan a study date! Nothing wrong with two friends studying together."
"I don't know him like that, Lils."
"Sure you do, miss ‘I bet he tastes like chocolate and tea’" she sang again, giving up the chess game.
"And butterbeer, and sweaters, and menthol." We laugh some more, my face falling a minute after with another thought. "But to him....I taste of nothing at all. He doesn't think of me that way. He doesn't look at me and think "I bet she tastes like-like-like strawberries or spring time". There's no way!"
"You don't know that. You aren't even his friend." Lily continues to mock me. She looks over to Remus again, her eyes much less soft on him then mine. Suddenly, she whips her head back to me. "But I am! I'm his friend! I could totally ask what he thinks about you!"
"Lily- no. It will be completely obvious, okay? Just drop it. I'll get over it in no time, it's fine."
She agrees reluctantly, after ten minutes of me pleading. We clean up the chess game and shes quickly off to bed. I would have followed her, though Remus's papers cluttered all over the floor didn't seem like good news. Some of these kids are ruthless, he may wake up to find half of them missing. It's no big deal- right? Friends help each other clean. It's just common courtesy, see a mess, clean it up. I crawl over the common room, collecting his notes from all around. Windy nights in the towers aren't very helpful with this task, gusts often pushing them under furniture or plucking them from my hands. Eventually, I get them all picked up, sitting in front of the small coffee table and re ordering them correctly. I hope Remus doesn't think of it as an intrusion. This thought only brings along panic, which I can only help with a small note, hoping its enough.
Sorry if I messed up your notes. It was windy, I didn't want any of them going missing or for someone to steal them. Hopefully it's not too bad, anyways. -Y/N
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Remus's POV
Sun creaks in through the windows and footsteps rattle loudly on the floor above me, finally forcing me to wake. The couch- shit. I hadnt meant to fall asleep studying, at least not in public like this. I rub the sleep out of my eyes and sit up, noting the warm blanket that falls from my shoulders and the neat stacks of textbooks and loose parchment, held down with an enlarged gobstone, acting as a paperweight. There's a note on the top of them, I find, and can only hope I can switch from silently thanking the mystery angel to actually appreciating them in person. I gather my things, deciding to read it in my room as I get dressed.
Y/n. I wasn't too close with her, she's a friend of Wormy’s. She was in my transfiguration class, though, and I suppose it wouldn't hurt to make friends with her. I'd start today, maybe sit by her and thank her for everything. I can only assume she's behind the blanket, too. Maybe breakfast, instead, which I'd miss if I didn't hurry up.
I had to talk myself into it, all the way to the great hall. I'd never been great at conversing, and after I said thank you, I had no idea what to talk about. Or if she'd want to talk, maybe it was just one kind act just out of courtesy. Anyhow, I opened the doors and she was already sandwiched between Lily and one of the Prewett twins. That's fine, Transfiguration was next. Besides, I hadn't talked to the guys since dinner last night.
"Morning." I reported, taking my seat and a couple pieces of toast.
"Morning, Moony!" Sirius cheers, "Sleep well?"
"Yeah- yeah. Fine." My eyes flicker back to y/n, thinking about the quilt again. And the notes. Our eyes meet for a moment when she looks up, though her head falls straight back down after her eyes go wide. I chuckle silently a bit at it.
"Who are you eyeing down there?" James asks, putting a spoonful of eggs on my plate for me. "Better not be my Lily flower, you know I'm trying again in potions."
"No one. So, have we figured out how to alter that tickling hex yet?"
Breakfast continues on, myself looking back to y/n every so often so that I dont lose her. I wanted to make sure I didn't forget, or talk myself out of it. A small thank you can't hurt, but I know my social anxiety will convince me otherwise the longer I wait. She stands from the table, dusting crumbs off her robe and laughing a bit more with her friends. I watch her every step from the far end of the table, knowing I need to get up sooner rather than later.
"Okay, you're definitely checking someone out. Who i-"
"Hold that thought, I've gotta go."
I shove one more bite of eggs in my mouth, grabbing my books and rushing out as quickly as my sore legs would let me. Y/n left breakfast fairly early, most other kids taking it as another opportunity to study or the exact opposite, a time to get away from it all. The halls were practically empty, making it easy to find her.
"Uh- y/n! Hold on a moment?" I call out, watching her whip around to see me. I jog ahead, walking side by side with her now. "Sorry. I wanted to say thank you...for last night. I'd be dead without those notes."
"Oh! Oh, it's no problem. I won't lie, I definitely took some sneak peeks while I was putting them back in order."
"Thanks for that, too! Merlin, it would've taken me ages. And-uh- maybe i'm wrong, i don't know, but someone gave me a quilt last night?"
"Yeah, sorry. It just seemed a little brisk. To me, anyway. I didn't mean to-" she rambles, hand raking through her hair. I can't help but to snicker.
"No, no. It's just another thing I mean to thank you for. It was really nice, so, thank you."
"No problem." She smiles, looking up at me for the first time this entire walk, though she faces the floor just as quickly. We're nearing McGonagall's room sooner than I'd thought, and she seemed so sweet, I figured it wasn't too scary to talk some more.
"Do you mind if I sit next to you in here? Schapmire is a complete numpty. It's okay if not, though."
"No, that's fine! Please do! I mean, not please, or, well- yeah. It's fine."
Turns out, sitting next to her was the best decision I could’ve made this morning. I learned she makes a lot of smart-ass comments under her breath during class, leaving me having to chew on the shaft of my quill to keep from laughing too loudly. Every time I looked over at her after hearing one, she’d turn crimson at the realization that it wasn't just in her head. I was actually quite disappointed to hear the chimes alerting us it was time to move onto a different class, it came as a huge shock that class was over so fast. Y/n may have well sprinted out of the door after saying a quick goodbye to me, a bit adorable, really. After just an hour, I can see why Peter likes her so much.
I finish packing my things at the realization i'd be late for CMC if I didn't hurry, but find my thoughts interrupted by the voice of a certain redhead.
"Quick question-"
"Lily, I've already told you. If you want to use me and my notes, then you can join the study group. I don't have time to quiz you in the hallway constantly."
"First of all, rude. Second of all, it's not about class. I wanted to know what you thought about my friend y/n."
"How do you mean?"
"Just...your thoughts."
"Okay. Uh, she's pleasant."
"Pleasant?" Her voice is a bit snide, clearly not what she had hoped for.
"Well, you know. She's kind, and funny. Real funny. I suppose she's pretty, too. Great smile." Lily is practically squealing beside me. "What? That's a normal compliment."
"You're right. What else?"
"What do you want me to say, Lily? I've had a single one on one conversation with her, and she barely looked at me the whole time. I don't really have a fully developed opinion."
"Alright- okay. I'll back off." She says, rubbing up against arm comfortingly. "You could always have more one-on-ones with her. In fact, you should, and then get back to me with a "fully developed opinion", got it?"
I'm not given a chance to answer as Lily rushes off to another group of friends. She's right, though. I should get to know her better. It's just a matter of figuring out what to do and how to go about it.
Transfiguration felt like it lasted 3 minutes with y/n, and suddenly all my other classes felt 8 hours long. Even when I was with James, the time just wasn't flying. Soon enough, however, it was time for lunch. I was starving after cutting breakfast short, and I think I'd figured out how to talk with y/n again sooner than just next transfiguration class. I sat in my normal spot, just until y/n arrived in the great hall with Lily at her side. They were the only two at her side of the table, thank goodness. I walked over, talking myself in and out of asking, really hoping I'd decide on asking by the time I got over to her side.
"Uh- y/n?" I ask, standing opposite her at the table, watching her pick her head up from her food, her hand shooting over her mouth as she chewed. I snicker lightly to myself before beginning, feeling much more calm. "You said this morning that you looked over my notes last night..."
"Oh my goodness! Did I miss a page? I'll help find it, I swear."
"No, no! They're all there. I just- I was wondering if you wanted to study with me some time." Her face lights up for a moment, just to fall immediately after.
"Ah, I'm sorry. I have a lesson with slughorn on Tuesday evenings. I know that's when you do your study group."
"Oh! No, I meant...I meant maybe just us two." I try to gauge her reaction. If only she was as easy as Lily, who was all bright smiles and biting her lip. "You don't have to, though. I get it. It's just probably easier to make sure we cover everything when it's just a couple people instead of a big group." Y/n looks over to Lily for a second, then back up to me, flashing her wonderful smile.
"Yeah, that sounds great. Does 8 sound okay? I have a lot of homework."
"Yeah, 8 is fine." I smile back, myself looking to the ground now as she had all day. "Well, I'll see you then, I guess."
I get back to our table the same time as the other boys do, all of us filling up our plates and diving in. Once again, I'm totally distracted by y/n further down, and with the lack of students around, they caught who I was staring at.
"Moony- no. No!" Wormtail calls out. "No! I called her!"
"You can't call a lass, wormy. Besides, look at how happy our moony is!" James says, mock swooning with sirius.
"Rich coming from the guy who yelled at him this morning about lily!" Wormtail shoots back. "Come on, Remus, don't take this away from me!"
"I don't know what you all are talking about. I just asked her to study with me, we've had one conversation."
"A date!" Siris exclaims. "Oh, Moony, it's a date, isn't it? Or you want it to be, anyways. Use your classic Remus charm, the birds love it! Remember when you made Marlene trip over her own feet? AND SHES NOT EVEN INTO GUYS!"
"Shut up and eat." I say again, ignoring what he suggested in fear that he's right. Maybe I do sort of like her. She's enjoyable enough.
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Y/N's POV
Remus and I met just outside the common room later that night, after dinner and after I had time to clean up. I know it's not a date, but Lily convinced me to look nice anyways. I collected my text books and put them in my bag, and Remus and I walked side by side to the library without much conversation. I had mentioned something about not doing too well in History of Magic, which he just so happens to excel in. We decided to start with that (which I thought was totally charming, him worried about my struggles).
We took a seat in the far corner of the library, only a lamp lit the table, which was cozy. Remus explained that this was his favorite spot, taking into account the lack of students and how easy it was to sneak from madam pince after hours. He cast muffliato around us, considering we'd entered 15 minutes past its close and wouldn't want the session interrupted. I slid into a seat first, Remus following, first sitting across from me. Our legs brushed a moment under the table and I was suddenly thankful for the lack of light, shielding my blush. After realizing we would need as much table room as possible, he switched to the seat beside me. This isn't much better, with his long legs causing our knees to knock against each other and his fingers to glide across my skirt as he bent down to pick up a quill id dropped.
We mainly started with talking about the rest of our days, awful small talk. Even with the muffliato, we mainly whispered to one another. It was suffocating, all the tension and uncomfortableness. I couldn't be happier when we actually cracked open a text book. I allowed myself to relax, groaning about the subject matter as I would if I were here with Lily.
"Yeah, the Goblin Revolts aren't terribly interesting, but have you heard of the broom revolution?" He asks, smiling over at me as I shake my head no. "Really? Its sweeping the nation."
I can't help but burst out laughing at it, trying to calm down before it turns into a rolling cackle, though Remus's mix of laughter and a shocked face wasn't helping. I ended up clutching my stomach in the pain of such a roaring laugh, out of breath and no longer audible aside from wheezing. Eventually, we both settled back down.
"Sorry, sorry." I say, wiping the tear off my face. "Woo, I'm fine."
"You really thought that was funny?"
"Obviously! Puns are an under-appreciated art."
"Yes! You get it!" He laughs, turning back to the notes. "We should brush up on our knowledge anyways." He snickers again, nudging my shoulder with his own.
After the immense laughter, Remus shoved puns wherever he could, half the time laughing harder at them than I was (he could only make puns about cleaning and gardening tools so many times. I mean, the shovels being ground breaking?). We did get a lot done though, often having soft debates over which one of us was right or how much detail was needed. Towards the end of the night, it was getting more playful and less polite.
"Yes it is! It's literally right there!" I exclaim, poking his notes with my quill, accidentally leaving a few dots of ink under the words. "It's in your own handwriting! 1612, the three broomsticks!"
"Okay! Alright! You're right!" We whisper-yell at each other, laughing furiously. "What time is it?"
"Looks like....9:58. Two minutes till curfew."
We agreed we should get going soon, Remus offering to clean up everything by himself so I didn't have a bigger risk of detention, but I was all too happy to help him out. A detention never hurt anyone anyhow, and maybe I'd land one with him. After I made it clear I'd be helping, Remus asked if he could walk me up to my dorm (or as far as the stairs would let him), claiming there was exactly one advantage to being a prefect and he'd be willing to use it on me. Obviously, I agreed.
"So," Remus begins, stopping in front of the bottom step to the girl's dormitories, "what would you think of another study date sometime soon?"
"D-date?" I choke out, not really meaning to. I think I may have sounded a bit too eager, or maybe uncomfortable based on his expression.
"Uh-" something changes within him, and he becomes more relaxed and sure of himself in seconds. I'd seen this look on him before, usually making me envious when he starts to flirt with girls in the hallway. "I mean, if you want it to be. Don't act so surprised, I'm sure a gorgeous gal like you always has guys all over you."
My cheeks are on fire, the pit of my belly is swarming with butterflies. I'm speechless, my mouth falling open and shut over and over as I try to respond. I rake a hand through my hair, twirling the ends while Remus chuckles, stretching his arms above his head, appearing even larger than usual as my eyes widen.
"Anyways, I've had a fabulous night with you. I hope you'll at least consider a study date with me." Remus smiles, turning around and walking away as I start up the stairs. "Oh, and y/n?" He says again, getting my attention, "it's okay if you'd rather be friends. Let me know and I'll cut out this charming git crap. Have a good night."
"You too, Remus."
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I had to explain to Lily the next morning that it was no laughing matter, I simply was in love with the guy. I had the biggest smile on my face while I got ready for bed, and again when I was getting ready for class, and trying to cool it down by breakfast. For the third time, Remus stops over at my side of the table, Lily pretending she's not consumed by the drama as he sits across from me.
"That's weird, I thought I walked into the great hall, but it must be a museum." He says, the same look from last night making my stomach flutter again.
"Why's that?" I mutter quietly, trying not to seem as desperate as I was.
"Well, you certainly are a work of art." He leans in over the table, keeping his voice low and deep. I nearly spat out my tea, Remus taking notice. "Still have a lot of important dates to learn for history, wanna be one of them?" He smiles again, looking over to his usual spot and seeing his friends arrive. "I'll let you think about it. Or figure out how to tell me to stop being a nitwit."
I turn back to my breakfast, aiming for my heart to stop thumping so loudly and quickly. Lily cracks up beside me, linking our arms together and making kissy noises in my ear. I have to get away from her at the very least, and as I pass where the Marauders sit, Peter grabs my arm.
"Say, y/n, just let me know what chance I have with you?" He begs, looking into my eyes as Sirius and James laugh.
"Pete- I-" my eyes fall to the floor again, trying to figure out what to say. "I'm really sorry, Petey, but I fancy someone else. Please don't let this change our friendship, yeah?"
"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Go shove off wherever you were going."
It was hard to leave Peter like that, all disappointed and upset with me. I truly didn't want to hurt his feelings, but I couldn't bear to be there for more than a few seconds, especially not with all four of those boys staring at me. I rushed out of the doors quickly, slowing back down once I was a few feet away. I thought I'd finally gotten a second alone, but unfortunately for me, someone else was just a few steps behind me.
"Like someone else, huh?"
"And what makes you think it's you, loverboy?"
"For starters, you haven't told me to drop the loverboy act. Then, of course, there's your adorable blushing whenever I'm around." He starts, leaning his head down some as we walk so I can better hear his whispering. "And the way you won't look at me for more than a couple seconds. I know I'm not that hideous."
As we turn the corner, I hesitantly back him into the stone, nervous for my own action. I'd already pushed it this far, I had no choice but to go through with it. I stood on the very tips of my toes, hands resting on his broad shoulders as I connected our lips, focusing on his bottom one that had been the centerpiece of many thoughts of the boy. I pull back away before I can decipher how he felt about it, though with the flirting, I don't think it would be very negative.
"Merlin, then there's the fact that you kissed me." His voice has a sudden raspiness to it that's addicting. He links our pinkie fingers together and looks down at them. "And of course, how hard you laugh at all my jokes. No one likes puns that much."
I wasn't really sure what the next step was. The two of us just stood in the empty hallway, vision flickering all around, not staying focused on one thing for too long. Remus began to lightly swing our arms from side to side, making me snicker to myself. I could feel him staring at me and decided to meet his eyes.
"What's so funny?"
"No, no, nothing. I just- it's nothing." I respond, laughing a bit harder now. "Kiss me again, I need to make sure of something."
Hesitantly, he grants me the endearment. It's much better with him really kissing back, one hand grazing my jaw ever so softly. Just as I'd thought- menthol, butterbeer, tea. Chocolate, mostly. It's the most delightful kiss I've ever experienced, I could stay here forever. I'm sure Lily will have a ball when I tell her about it (and how right I was).
“Peter’s going to be absolutely cheesed off when I tell him how nice you taste. I've always pictured strawberries, but you're awfully peach, aren't you?” Remus whispers, just loud enough to fill the space between us. “Probably weird to be thinking about that.”
“No, not at all.” I respond, trying to pull back my giddiness and not expose just how thrilled I was to hear him say those words.
Oh yeah, he could definitely mean everything to me. I think he may already.