Toujours Pur- Sirius Black

Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
F/F
F/M
M/M
G
Toujours Pur- Sirius Black
Summary
This is the story of Sirius Orion Black, someone who deserved so much better than he ever got. A boy raised in an unjust way, forced into beliefs off blood supremacy that he wished not to be apart off. Sirius goes through more than most ever will, and forces himself to break family traditions despite the outcomes.
Note
I will try and put all possible trigger warning in the notes at the top so please be sure to read them :)I would really love comments guys so please please tell me your thoughts :)TW:- This chapter contains child abuse!!!I’m sorry for the harsh beginning!!!
All Chapters

Secret Passage

Laughter echoed throughout the corridor as Sirius sprinted down them, James close behind him. They were weaving their way in and out of other students, trying to avoid running into them. 

"STOP!" Sirius shouted back to James, laughter taking over.

"Surrender then!" James laughed back "Surrender and admit that I'm the best and I will stop chasing you!" 

"Never!" he laughed, running left into a deserted corridor than he was sure he had never been in before. A gasp escaped Sirius as he ran forwards to a metal knight statue that was carrying a sword. Pointing his wand at the statue "Aufero," he said firmly and the hand of the knight moved almost inconspicuously, releasing the sword from its tight grip.

Sirius stepped forwards and pulled the long sword from the knight and held it tight in his hands as James ran round the corner and was met with Sirius grinning widely.

"Fight to the death, Potter." They both burst into laughter at the scene. James' mouth fell agape as he looked from the sword to Sirius to the statue. "Come on! Try me!" he said, approaching James.

"No!" James laughed, running around Sirius and down the hall to another identical statue which happened to be holding a sword. "I want one." He reached up, attempting to grab the sword and yet it wouldn't budge. Sirius found himself in a fit of laughter at James' struggle. "What?! How did you do that?!" 

"There is this really cool thing called magic, James! Would you believe that?" James rolled his eyes and held his middle finger up but failed to hide his smile. Sirius stopped laughing and pointed his wand at the knight statue in front of Jmaes and repeated the spell. 

"We haven't learnt that," James said, his brows furrowed.

"See, just proves that I am the best." James raised his sword and pointed it towards Sirius.

"This is heavy," James said, swinging it around his head and nearly dropping it. Sirius winced, thinking he was going to end up cutting himself or something stupid. The boys got closer to each other, laughing and holding the swords up, ready to fight. "Fight to the death."

Sirius swung his sword first, James quickly hitting his Sword in front to block him. They both froze and laughed. "You didn't think I was serious?" Sirius smirked.

"Well I tho-"

"James, I'm always Sirius." James tried his best not to let out a small laugh whilst they began fighting with the stone swords. The clashing echoed off the walls and they were lucky the hallway was deserted and away from any classrooms. They were idiotically not being careful and had almost hit each other multiple times. 

Sirius watched James' eyes widen and face drop as he looked over his shoulder and quickly took the sword and attempted to hide it behind his back. Sirius spun around quickly,  curious on what James had seen and followed his idea of hiding the sword behind his back. The Prewett twins were standing at the end of the corridor staring at the two boys in disbelief.

"I thought you were Filch!" Sirius sighed in relief before turning back to James "You scared m-"

"Ouch," the twins said in unison "That's an insult."

"How the bloody hell did you get those swords?" Gideon, at least Sirius guessed it was Gideon, asked. Sirius shrugged and let his eyes follow the direction of the Knights statues.

"Yes but how?" the other twin asked as they walked closer to Sirius and James "We've tried to get the swords from them for years but never knew a spell that worked."

"Wasn't me," James shrugged "Sirius knows a spell."

The twins looked at Sirius with pure curiosity.

"It's the Aufero spell?" Sirius said unconfidently. The twins looked at each other with the same unknowing look.

"Never heard of it," Fabian shrugged "We'll make a deal with you."

A deal?

Fabian and Gideon whispered to each other for a few seconds before nodding in agreement. 

"Okay you teach us the spell quickly and we will show you something really cool in this corridor." 

Sirius wasn't sure whether to trust them or whether that actually had anything cool to show him but he didn't mind showing them the spell anyways. 

"I don't mind showing you the spell but I just realised there's a slight problem." 

"And that is?" 

"I don't know how to reverse it." Sirius walked up to the Knight in which he stole the sword from. "The spell makes them release the swords but I don't know how to put it back properly." He put the sword back in the hands of the knight but it was loosely standing, the knight didn't regain its grip on the sword "So now I suppose anyone can grab the sword."

"Well..." Fabian said 

"That sounds like a problem for somebody else to solve don't you think?" Gideon laughed. Sirius looked to James and shrugged with a small laugh. He walked the three boys to the next Knight in the corridor and showed them the spell slowly and both twins tried it on the next knights until the row of perfected knights armour all had either missing swords of swords that were no longer stuck to them. 

"That's wicked." Sirius just shrugged at them, not realising it was something unknown. "Where'd you learn that?" 

"Uh I don't really know, just seen my family use it a lot I guess." 

The twins nodded in acknowledgment before saying "shall we?" Sirius and James shared the same glance and yet decided to follow the boys down to the end of the hall where they pulled forwards a statue or 'Gregory the Smarmy'. Sirius and James were both equally confused on they were showing them. 

"Now this is one of our many secrets. One in which not many know about so in all due respect, it would be much appreciated if you do not tell anyone about it." Sirius and James agreed though they both knew it was highly likely they were going to tell Peter and Remus. 

"We actually hate telling anyone about these but you've helped us out with a plan we've had for a very long time so it's only fair we keep to our word." 

"Here," They said whilst pulling it to the side completely, revealing a small archway that lead into darkness "Is the start to all your adventures." 

James and Sirius both stepped forwards to get a closer look but the passageway was as dark as it could possibly could be. 

"Where does it lead?" James asked. 

"I'm assuming you've both heard of Hogsmeade right?" 

"Of course." 

"This leads you right to Hogsmeade. There's only one path so you can't get lost. It's takes you until you're met with a locked door. Unlock the door at the other end and you'll find yourself in a cellar."

"The cellar," Fabian continued "Belongs to the Herbology shop. You go up the stairs, into the shop and out the door and BANG you're in hogsmeade." 

"We can't go to Hogsmeade till third year,"

"Oh Potter," the boys laughed before putting a hand on his shoulder. "Rules? Rules are for the boring people. This takes you to hogsmeade and the teachers will never know- if you're careful enough." 

"That's so cool," Sirius grinned whilst looking into it "You better not be lying. If I choose to go down there one day and it doesn't lead me to Hogsmeade I will be fairly disappointed."

"You're a fellow Gryffindor, Black. We don't prank our own hous- actually we do but that's besides the point. We're not lying."

"Right Fab, we've got things to plan. Boys, I hope you have fun with this knowledge and access to Hogsmeade."

"Don't forget to put the statue back every time and don't tell anyone. Thanks boys." And with that they left, leaving James and Sirius to just stand there in confusion, looking from the dark passageway to the boys that were walking away. 

"Do you trust it?" Sirius asked. 

"Only one way to find out."

"We're actually going through it?" Sirius questioned "To Hogsmeade?" 

"Yeah! Do you know how much cool stuff we could get in Hogsmeade? We have to tell Pete and Remus and see what they say. Remus can add it to that map of his and everything. The twins wouldn't of shown us a random hole in the wall would they?"

"Wouldn't put it past me."

"No you helped them with that spell, think they're telling the truth." 

The boys wandered round the school, attempting to find Remus and Peter. They checked the dorm, the common room, the library, the courtyard and yet they were nowhere to be seen. 

They waited and waited until finally they turned up at the dorm. 

"Where have you been?!" James said sitting up and looking over to them "We've been waiting forever."

"We have an adventure to go on," Sirius explained "Now." 

Peter and Remus didn't even get a chance to speak as James and Sirius pushed them back out the door and led them down to the corridor where the secret passageway led after telling them both to grab their wands, the map and money. They were slightly hesitant about the whole thing yet neither of them had a say as James and Sirius pushed them into the passageway and pulled the knight back to hide it. 

"I am not staying in here," Peter argued "Let me out right now! It's pitch black! I bet there's rats everywhe-"

"Lumos," James said, letting a bright white light glow the end of his wand. The other three copied and now they could see far into the passageway. 

The passageway was narrow and clearly abandoned. Cobwebs crept up the walls and it was slightly nerve wracking as a chill swept over them. Sirius felt nerves and fear etch it's way into him and it unmanned him. 

Each step created a chilling echo in which none of the boys liked. "Are we sure about this?" Peter asked "They could be lying this could lead us anywhere."

"It's fine," James nodded "Absolutely fine." His voice betrayed his confidence as he sounded unsettled. "Just think, if this actually leads to Hogsmeade it will be amazing!"

"How far is it?" Remus asked

"We don't know," Sirius answered. 

"Right... Is it safe?" 

"We don't know."

"That's reassuring, alright let's go." 

"That's the spirit, Remus." 

"James, you act like I had a choice in this." 

The walk was long yet they became less weary the further they went. Lots of questions were asked, all in which were left unanswered. After a while they began to settle and make some jokes about it and came up with ideas about how they were really being led to their deaths which Peter did not enjoy. 

Sirius was sure Peter was going to have a heart attack due to the amount of times James had jumped out of nowhere and made him scream. They had no idea how long they had been walking but they had decided that there was no point going back before they had at least discovered what was at the end. 

"Guys... is that a door?" Remus asked. Sirius' heart leapt at the sight of it. 

"It's the door! The door to the cellar!" 

After many arguments and complaints they made their way into the cellar that was filled with plants and flowers, boxes and shelves until they found their way to an old staircase which must have led to the actual shop as Gideon and Fabian had said. 

"Told you all they weren't lying," James said. 

"Shut it, James!" 

"Love you too, Pete." 

The boys were uncertain of whether it was a good idea to enter the actual shop, worried that the owner may see them and they'd get in trouble. They decided to enter the shop anyways. 

Thankfully the shop was so filled that nobody had noticed the boys come out of the cellar. The shop was like a miniature jungle, it was beautiful. Excitement began to settle in Sirius, his mind begging to escape the shop and see Hogsmeade for the first time. Perhaps he should've been nervous as they were breaking countless school rules and if his parents were to find out then he would be done for but he couldn't help but let the excitement consume him. It was so new and so thrilling to be able to be able to do what he wanted. 

It was astonishing. It was a picturesque village, filled with beauty and magic. Every cottage was stunning with thatched roofs and vines running along them. Lights hung along all the shops and it wasn't overly busy. Sirius could've sworn on his own life that it was one of the most stunning places he had ever been. 

Now that the boys were out of the shops all sense of fear left them and they were all enamoured by the village. 

"It's honeydukes!" Peter beamed "Can we go?!" 

"Peter we aren't your parents you don't have to ask permission. Of course we're going!" The three boys made their way over to Honeydukes laughing and smiling whilst pointing out different things and yet Remus stood in his spot, taking in everything around him. 

"Remus is still over there, I'll meet you in the shop hold on," Sirius said before going back to Remus. "You alright?" 

"Yeah," he almost whispered "Yeah i'm fine." Sirius wondered why he was quite so amazed by it all until he remembered that he had hardly ever seen wizarding towns. 

"Come on then. Honeydukes is amazing we have to go see it." Remus nodded whilst turning around and following him up to the shop. 

Honeydukes was nothing like Sirius had ever seen before. It was so full of colour and joy, it was impossible not to love it. 

The boys spent ages adventuring round Hogsmeade and it's shops until Remus pointed out that it was getting dark and that they'd have to be getting back before it was too late. 

The sun has already began to lower, faint hues of orange fading behind the roofs of the houses as everything got quieter- calmer. 

They had never had so much fun since being in Hogwarts, they had bought countless joke sweets and equipment from the joke shop and stocked up on confectionery. The walk back through the passage was no longer filled with terror or fear and felt so much quicker. 

Attempting to avoid anyone and everyone they rushed back to the common room with their arms filled with newly bought things. 

"Ah." They were met with Fabian and Gideon Prewett. A smirk across their faces and eyebrows raised. 

"We had to tell Remus and Peter but your secrets safe with us," James laughed "It's brilliant!" 

"It's so cool!" 

"Good doing business with you, Black." Sirius nodded to them as he and the others made their way to the boys steps. "If you have any other useful spells like that be sure to tell us." 

"Of course!" 

The rest of the weekend resulted in testing out their joke products and adding the secret passage to Remus' map. 

"You know, there's got to be more hidden passages right?" Peter said. Sirius looked over at him in thought. 

"Yeah I bet there's loads." 

"We should try find them all!" 

"Great enthusiasm and all guys but it's almost midnigh-" Remus paused as a horrid putrid smell began to fill the room, making Sirius feel sick to his stomach. The boys pinched their noses and turned round fast to see James standing in a mist of green with a look of horror whilst almost gagging at the smell. "James!" 

"That stinks!" 

"NO DUNGBOMBS OFF IN THE DORM!"

"IT WAS AN ACCIDENT, REMUS. I SWEAR!" he shouted. Sirius, Peter and Remus evacuated the room quietly, attempting not to wake other people. They forced James to stay in and open all the windows as punishment for the smell. 

After the smell had cleared they made their way back into the room, trying not to laugh at James who looked so innocently ashamed of himself. 

"James you look a toddler who's just been told off."

"It was an accident." 

"We're not mad. It just stunk." A smile slowly grew on James' face and he couldn't help but agree. 

October 16th 1971

Today has been the funnest day EVER! I fought James with a SWORD and we went to Hogsmeade. 

The twins showed us a secret passage that takes us right to Hogsmeade and it is extraordinary! We have so many joke stuff now and I just can't wait. 

I have no doubt anymore. None at all. I'm upset that my family are ashamed that i'm a Gryffindor yet I am not ashamed. My friends are the best and it's so fun in Gryffindor. 

Hogwarts is my favourite place in the world and I hope I am friends with these boys for the rest of my life. 

Sirius' sleep had began to ease. The nightmares haunted him less and his mind relaxed. Things hadn't changed, not really, except the fact that he felt safe in Hogwarts. He felt... happy. There was always things at the back of his mind but he learnt to live with it, learnt that it didn't matter so much. He was just praying that it wouldn't all crash back down on him. 

Weeks had passed by. The weeks felt as if they were getting shorter and shorter which meant Christmas was nearing and unlike the others, Sirius wasn't looking forward to it. 

November had come and gone faster than ever. It followed the same routine and the same pattern as before although each day they were getting more and more comfortable with each other. 

Sirius was hurt to find out that Remus' family emergency had not been fixed as once again, he left Hogwarts to spend a night back home at the beginning of November. More and more of him wanted to ask what it was about but he wasn't sure whether he should. He wasn't sure if he was not asking for Remus' benefit or his own. He wasn't sure if he could handle the answer Remus may give and he was slightly worried that maybe Remus wasn't like him at all. 

Sirius had found himself talking to Bonnie and Lily a little more and him and Bonnie slowly started becoming friends rather than just family acquaintances. Lily still did not talk to him unless the other boys weren't around as her and James seemed to have a rather strong disliking for each other although Sirius sent her flowers by post once every two weeks as to try and make up for the flowers her sister no longer gave her. 

A small ounce of Sirius still hoped for a letter to drop onto his plate every morning at breakfast yet one never did. It didn't necessarily disappoint him anymore but he still clutched hold of that hope. It wasn't his parents that was effecting him the most, it was Regulus. 

Regulus was his best friend, had been for 9 years and the chance that he was annoyed with Sirius made his heart fall into a black abyss. Despite the thought of going back home scared him- terrified him- he still wanted to more than anything. He wanted to see his little brother even if that meant getting a punishment from his parents because no matter what Sirius would always choose his brother. 

Sirius would never leave Regulus and he'd do anything for him. He clung to the hope that Regulus wasn't actually mad at him and that as soon as he returned home for Christmas everything would go back to how it was before.

Lessons were the same and homework was still a drag but Sirius had always made sure to keep on top of it as he didn't want to be held back in detentions like Remus had found himself doing recently. 

McGonagall's words to him about the sorting hat was beginning to settle in and he began to accept it. He wasn't that different to James so perhaps he was in the right house after all. Although Sirius would never admit it, if he went back to the sorting and had a choice which house to pick, he'd pick Gryffindor. He'd pick Gryffindor no matter the consequences because Sirius had only ever dreamed of having friends like James, Remus and Peter. He never though he would have something quite like it. 

He promised himself that he wouldn't ever make the choice between friends and family. At first he thought allowing himself to be friends with the other boys was betraying his family, was choosing friends over family but Sirius had decided he wasn't choosing one or the other. Sirius would have both friends and family no matter what, he promised himself to make Walburga, Orion and Regulus see sense. Show them that the world wasn't what they perceived it to be. That halfbloods, pureblood traitors and muggleborns weren't what they perceived them to be. 

Sirius was going to be the change. He was going to show them the reality. 

Hope was beginning to hug Sirius, comfort him as a friend. It was dangerous and cruel. Hope was a nasty thing for making Sirius believe that the impossible could happen but Sirius needed the hope because without it- without it he feared he may lose his family.

Sign in to leave a review.