Private Lessons
The obvious answer was yes.
Sirius was laying on his stomach on his bed, reading Remus’s message.
Just me? Not the group chat?
He checked that the text was sent directly to him, then he double checked with Lily.
Sirius: did you get a text from Remus recently?
A couple minutes later the reply came.
Lily: not today, if thats what you mean, why?
Sirius: no reason, just wondering
Lily: suure
Sirius rolled his eyes and texted Remus back.
Sirius: yeah sure, what time?
Remus: around 5? You can stay for supper after if you want
Sirius: its gonna be dark right after 5 though
Remus: the dark hasnt killed me yet
Sirius: alright, see you at 5
---
The next day, Sirius got to Remus’s house around five as promised and walked with his bag to the front door.
Remus answered and let him in, “keep your boots on, I’m gonna put mine on and we’ll go” he said and walked away from the door to grab his stuff.
It was colder out than the day before but that was because the sun was already going down. Sirius and Remus walked side by side all the way to the pond.
Something Sirius wasn't expecting was for there to be Christmas lights hanging in the trees around the pond, making it more scenic.
“I could have sworn those weren't there yesterday” Sirius said, mostly to himself while looking at all the lights. It wasn't quite dark enough yet to take in their full glory but he was sure they would look great.
Remus had plugged them into some sort of battery powered radio, he kept the radio off and was just using it as a portable charger for the lights.
“I want you to teach me skating moves,” Remus said as they brushed snow off the chairs and sat down.
“We did that yesterday though” Sirius said, “no I mean that was fun and all but more of it, or part of your routine or something” Remus said.
We could make our own routine
Sirius nodded “that can be done” he said in a sophisticated voice which made them both laugh.
Remus had already tied one skate before Sirius had put his first one on. Remus watched and waited patiently for Sirius to get his skates tied just right and they took to the pond together.
The ice looked very clean and freshly flooded, any sign that they had been there yesterday was almost completely gone.
“So what do you wanna learn?” Sirius asked, seemed like a fair question seeing as he had no idea how serious Remus was going to take this.
Remus had skated about half the ice away “I don't know, just start doing stuff and I’ll see what I wanna learn or what I think is neat” Remus said.
That was a great help
Sirius stood on the spot, staring at the ice, just doing pivots to get some ideas. He settled on going through his favourite part in his solo.
Sirius started to go through that part, but he wasn't really putting all his effort into it, he was just ‘going through the steps and not really feeling it’ as Sirius had heard Minerva tell Lily a couple times.
Remus stood still, just watching from the edge of the pond which didn't really help.
“Can I show you a spin?” Sirius asked.
“Yeah go for it, it'll be cool” Remus said, “I don't know about that, I haven't warmed anything up yet” Sirius responded but began to skate in a backwards circle anyway.
Sirius kept his eye on the middle of the imaginary circle and did a few crosscuts to gain speed before going into a camel spin.
Yeah that's not high enough
As his spin began to slow down, Sirius crouched and grabbed his free leg over his skating leg and spun like that before coming up and doing a normal one foot spin, which was very fast because he had all the momentum going into it from everything else.
Remus clapped and Sirius was still spinning with both feet on the ground in an attempt to slow down and stop being dizzy.
Just as he was about to completely lose his balance, a hand grabbed his arm, then his other arm and stabilised him. As soon as the world stopped spinning, Remus let go, “this is why we warm stuff up” Sirius said.
“Yeah, do you have any easier moves for me to learn?” Remus asked, Sirius considered it for a moment, “I can teach you a two foot spin” he said, Remus agreed and Sirius started explaining.
By the end of their mini private lesson, Remus knew how to do a spin from two feet into one foot, the first real jump you learn as a figure skater, a couple transition steps, and a lunge. Remus was already a little familiar with it, seeing as some hockey players do a version of it as a celebration sometimes.
“You and Lily said you do dances, can you show me one?” Remus asked, “sure, uh” Sirius stood thinking of which one to do.
He settled on the one he had passed most recently instead of the one he was currently working on.
Sirius did a round by himself then asked if Remus wanted to learn part of it.
Remus agreed, “we aren't gonna go that fast though because then at least one of us would get hurt” Sirius said, which made Remus laugh.
Sirius explained the steps as he did them almost on the spot and Remus watched intently and tried to copy a little.
“The way our coaches tend to teach us is to have us follow them on pattern, so follow me as best you can” Sirius explained. He skated to the center of the ice on the right side and pushed off to start the pattern.
Sirius said all the step names out loud while doing them and tried to watch as Remus did his best to copy him.
They went around twice and Sirius was having an internal battle almost the whole time.
It would be easier if we did it together, yeah but it would be weird though if he's not into me, I don't want him to fall and get hurt so we should just dance like normal dance partners, what if he doesn't want to though, it'll be fine
Sirius stopped, “you're kind of getting it, do you wanna try actually dancing it?” he asked.
Remus stopped a few feet in front of him, “if that makes it easier yeah, and if you're ok with it” he said, “who's the girl?”
Sirius laughed, “I know the guy parts so I guess you're gonna have to be the girl, besides the guy usually has to sort of lead the girl anyways and seeing as you have no idea what you're doing it might be a good idea”.
“Hey! I got some of it, give me credit here” Remus joked back, Sirius was smiling.
Sirius motioned for Remus to come closer.
I’m so fucking glad I chose this dance cause now I don't have to look him in the eye while we do this
This dance was the only one at this level that has the partners skate side by side as opposed to in a waltz or tango position which would make them face each other.
“So you know about the little teapot?” Sirius started, Remus snorted a bit “what? What does that have to do with this? Are we gonna have a tea break?” Remus sounded really confused but was in good spirits.
“No, but that's how your arms are orientated, like the little teapot” Sirius said and held his left arm straight out to his side and his right hand on his hip. Remus copied.
“There you go, see, it's like the ‘I’m a little teapot short and stout’ and the rest of it” Sirius said, “then I have to go here” he finished and stood on Remus’s left side with his right hand on Remus’s and his left hand holding Remus’s left hand.
“Now we just do all the same steps as before, ready” Sirius started them off and stepped onto his right foot, indicating they were going to try and do this for real.
They did the dance very slowly so Remus could get the tricky parts at the ends. It was working out alright for the first round but on the second round, Remus misstepped which caused them to both crash onto the ice.
“Sorry” was all Remus said as they picked themselves up, he offered Sirius a hand. “It's ok, we all fall”.
“Not that this isn't fun but let’s do something else” Remus suggested.
“Can I make us a little routine?” Sirius asked, much more excited than he thought he would have been.
That was all the convincing it took. Before long, Sirius had choreographed a whole short routine for them both. Partway through learning it, snow started to fall gently, and with how the Christmas lights and moon were lighting up the area, it was very pretty.
They were both feeling tired by this point though, Sirius’s face had gone mostly numb and he could tell Remus was running out of energy too.
They ran through the routine one last time and gave it everything they had.
At the very end when they were supposed to stop next to each other in the middle of the ice and high five above their heads, Remus did something Sirius was not expecting.
After the high five, Remus grabbed Sirius’s hand before he could take it back and pulled him closer to himself.
Remus took his other hand and began to spin them around slowly over the bumpy surface of the ice.
Sirius wondered what time it was, he looked up at the night sky as if it would tell him, which is when he took in the full beauty of the Christmas lights along with the glow of the moon and stars above them.
Now I get why he loves the moon
Sirius brought his eyes back down to look at Remus and saw that he was already looking at Sirius, which made him want to shrink away from his gaze out of embarrassment.
He didn't shrink away though, Sirius kept his eyes on Remus partly because it was keeping him from getting too dizzy. And partly because the part of Remus’s hair that stuck out from under his hat looked cute with snow sitting on it.
Remus was still staring at him, Sirius’s eyes flicked between Remus’s eyes, hair, and mouth, no matter how much he tried to avoid it.
Unsure of who pulled who, maybe they both did at the same time but Remus and Sirius were so close that Sirius could feel Remus’s breath on his face.
Remus opened his mouth as if to speak but his eyes told Sirius everything he needed to know.
They leant in together and their lips collided. Sirius could barely feel it at first, his and Remus’s lips being almost numb from the cold, but soon he could taste the warmth as it grew between them.
Remus’s big hockey gloves were holding onto Sirius’s elbows and Sirius moved his hands so they were near Remus’s chest and shoulders.
Sirius put a toe pick into the ice so he could lean to kiss Remus better.
They stood frozen on the ice together in the snowfall and lights.
When they pulled apart, Sirius stared at the ice in between their skates, desperately avoiding eye contact as he regained feeling in his cheeks from blushing.
Sirius looked up and watched Remus look at him too, Remus held his own elbow and looked away. Sirius started to gently tap his toe in and out of the ice, it’s a nervous habit that he has seemingly always had.
Their eyes met again, a few moments later. This time there was a semblance of ‘fuck it’ in their eyes so they went for it.
The comfort of Remus’s lips back on his was instant and Sirius could feel Remus smiling.
Sirius heard the sound of gloves dropping on the ice followed by Remus’s hands up in his hair, making his hat fall onto the ice too.
Sirius’s hands wanted more of Remus but the thickness of winter coats, and freezing cold hands in his gloves made it very difficult to feel anything other than fabric.
He settled his one hand on Remus’s neck after feeling the fluffy hair poking out from under Remus’s hat, and the other held him by the waist. Remus tugged on Sirius’s hair, whether that was an accident or on purpose will remain a mystery but Sirius let out a sound he did not want to admit he made.
Sirius was so caught up in the feeling of Remus’s hands in his hair that he didn't even notice his tongue at first.
Sirius opened his mouth to let their tongues meet and in doing so, they ended up even closer to each other than Sirius thought was physically possible.
Sirius had one toe in the ice to keep him from going too far backwards, but they soon discovered Remus didn't.
Sirius and Remus started gliding on the ice, Sirius was leaning forwards, so that meant Remus was going backwards.
They stopped moving and Sirius figured it was because Remus had moved one of his feet in a way that would prevent them from going anywhere.
Remus’s hands had come out of Sirius’s hair and now resided on his jaw near his ear.
Sirius wanted to say something about how awesome it feels but anything he managed to think of saying got muffled.
There was no semblance of cold anymore, everything was just Remus and warmth.
They had been collectively avoiding breathing properly by inhaling each other’s exhale this entire time, sort of by accident. That had served its purpose now and Sirius and Remus had to take a real breath.
They pulled apart but said nothing and continued to stare at each other while waiting for their breathing to return to normal.
Remus let his arms hang awkwardly by his own sides. Sirius wanted to put his hands in his pockets to preserve the warmth they had gained, but realised he had zipped up his pockets earlier so he held onto his own hand in front of his body instead.
It was dark, even with the faint glow of the Christmas lights lining the pond, and the stars and moon in the sky. But they were standing so close together that Sirius could see Remus open and close his mouth a few times, he did the same, but no words came out of either of the boys.
Remus looked down at the skates then up at the moon then at Sirius, for a bit longer than the former two, then skated away from him, picking up his gloves right before doing so.
Remus skated to the edge of the pond, walked on the little path in the snow to the chairs, and sat down to take his skates off. Sirius grabbed his hat and followed after him.
Neither of them spoke a word as they untied their skates or on the walk back to the house.
When they got to the house Sirius took his skates out of his bag to let the blades air dry on the doormat. He looked at Remus’s bag and knew that Remus wouldn't notice until later as he was busy making hot chocolate. Sirius took Remus’s skates out and put them on the doormat too.
Sirius was sitting on the couch when Remus came in with two mugs of hot chocolates, they sat in silence, letting their feet warm up by the fireplace.
Tension was high in the house until Remus broke it, well after their mugs were empty and feet were toasty.
“Uh, I’m sorry for kissing you, I should have asked I-” Remus started “dude I kissed you back, don't be sorry” Sirius cut him off.
Remus looked at Sirius as if that was the first time he clued into it. He shook his head as if to clear it of thoughts and returned to looking at the fire.
They sort of tiptoed around the topic after that.
What have we done? I didn't mean to make it awkward
He knew neither of them wanted to talk about it so he changed the subject.
“I don't mean to intrude but shouldn't your parents be home from work by now?” Sirius asked, Remus shook his head, “they’re on a business trip so they won't be back till Friday” he said.
A few more small attempts at conversation were made, most of which ended in one sentence answers.
“I’m not in the mood to make something to eat so I’m gonna get us a bunch of snacks as a late supper” Remus said as he walked off to the kitchen.
Sirius got off the couch to follow him, “are you ok?” he asked, “yeah I’m just tired” Remus answered and grabbed a bag of chips along with a box of crackers and a jar of peanut butter.
They sat in the living room watching a random show, eating the chips and crackers, sitting far apart on the couch.
After they had eaten enough to feel full, Remus got up again. “I’m going to bed, I’m really tired, you can do whatever you want as long as you don't destroy the place” he said.
Tired Remus is grouchy, noted
Sirius waited a couple seconds before he got up and turned the tv off. He followed Remus until he made it to his bedroom upstairs.
“I’m tired too, do you have any extra blankets I can take with me to the couch?” Sirius asked and peeked around in the room to figure out where blankets might be.
He saw Remus jump a little in surprise at hearing Sirius speak.
I guess I should really announce myself more of walk louder
Remus’s room looks like he hasn't redecorated since he was twelve, a few random lego sets on a bookshelf that was attached to a desk, a poster of the constellations on one of the walls, and a whole bunch of books Sirius recognised on the shelf. Most of the books were paperbacks and they looked well loved, it made Sirius smile for a reason he couldn't quite place.
Remus stopped and turned around, “not really, do you wanna just sleep up here instead?” There was a pause almost as if Remus just processed what he said. He tried again “you can sleep on the couch without a blanket if you want, it doesn't matter”.
“Are you serious about me sleeping up here?” Sirius asked, the offer was too good to be true but could have easily been a joke or an accident, no more than a thought he never meant to vocalise.
“No, I’m Remus” Remus answered, that made them both laugh and started to break the awkwardness of the whole night.
“Yeah it's a real offer now make your decision before I regret making it an option” he said, as if he were a salesman trying to give Sirius a free car.
“Well then I guess I have to sleep up here” Sirius said, Remus nodded.
Sirius left to use the bathroom while Remus got changed and went back in after he assumed Remus would be done.
Remus was standing by his desk in his pajamas, playing with a pen that was laying there. When the door creaked, he faced Sirius, “I have some pajamas you can borrow” he said and went through a little pile of clothes in a drawer.
He handed Sirius a random hockey shirt and faded plaid pants. Sirius thanked him and went out into the hall to change.
This is too big
He left his normal clothes in a ball next to Remus’s bedroom door.
Sirius came back into Remus’s room and held out his arms to show that the sleeves were too long and Remus tried to hide his giggle.
“What, you're a lanky giant, I’m gonna trip if I take another step in these pants” Sirius lifted up one leg to show Remus how much longer the pants were than his legs.
He was over exaggerating as the pants were only barely covering his feet, but Sirius figured it would be funny.
This time Remus did fully laugh, “drama queen, you're not gonna be doing much walking if you're laying down, plus more fabric will keep you warmer anyways” he said.
Sirius honestly didn't really care that the pajamas were too big for him, they smelled like Remus, as did this entire room and that made him happy.
They crawled into bed one after the other and Remus turned the light on his nightstand off.
It was too dark to see anything anymore but that almost made it easier.
Remus sighed, Sirius felt the air from it hit him because they were facing each other on the twin sized bed in the corner of Remus’s room.
“I want to ask you something” Remus started, “same” “uh, on three?” “why?” “cause it's less scary” “ok”.
Never took him to be this nervous about anything, sure he's shy but he doesn't get nervous
They counted to three.
The words were a bit jumbled, but one word they said together was ‘boyfriend’.
“Wait, what did you say?” Remus asked, “I said ‘can I be your boyfriend?’” Sirius answered, Remus laughed “I said ‘do you wanna be boyfriends?’”
They laughed together, “I guess you know what the answer to that one is then?” Sirius said, “yeah”.
Sirius tilted his head up and brushed his nose against Remus’s jaw, Remus kissed his nose.
“Ok but now I seriously am tired” Remus said and readjusted himself on the bed, not knowing where to go with his arms, or his legs for that matter.
Sirius took Remus’s arms and placed them around his body, then wrapped his own arms around Remus and curled up into him. Their legs sorted themselves out, a bit tangled but it was comfortable.
Remus settled around him and the room fell silent.
---
The next morning, Sirius woke up in a bed in a room that wasn't his. There was someone in the bed with him.
He racked his brain to remember what happened and that's when it came to him, this is Remus and Remus’s room.
Their legs were tangled together and they were hugging under the blanket. Sirius closed his eyes again to soak up the moment.
“Morning” Remus said, Sirius opened his eyes again and looked at Remus. “Morning”.
“How did you sleep?” Sirius asked, “really well” “can we stay here all day?” “probably not, but we can stay for a little while longer”.
So they did, half an hour later they got up.
Remus stood up and stretched, Sirius rubbed at his eyes, then they went downstairs to find something to eat.
“Are we really boyfriends now?” Sirius asked, “yeah? At least I’m pretty sure, if I remember correctly” Remus answered while searching for waffles in the freezer.
“I thought so, just checking in case I dreamed it or something” Sirius said. Remus found the waffles and dropped four of them into the toaster, Sirius sat on a barstool and rolled his pant legs up enough so that he wouldn’t constantly be standing on them. He did the same to the sleeves.
“I thought you weren’t into dudes” Sirius said, Remus shook his head, “no, where did you get that idea from?” “James said it at some point, I think when me and Lily were dress shopping, he said neither of you liked guys but that me and Lily were hot or something” Sirius explained.
Remus nodded, he had taken two glasses out of the cupboard and filled one with milk, held up the jug of orange juice and milk pitcher for Sirius to pick from, he went with milk.
Remus brought him his glass, “no, that's just something James does, I don't wanna accidentally out myself to anybody and he knows that so he sort of makes sure that doesn't happen”.
Sirius nodded, “that makes sense” “so does Lily know?” Remus asked, “yeah, she always has, first and only person, up until you of course” Sirius said.
The toaster popped and Remus put two waffles on each plate, brought them along with maple syrup and cutlery to where Sirius was sitting, sat down next to him, then remembered he left his glass of milk on the other counter. He got up to retrieve it then sat down again. Sirius nodded his thanks when Remus gave him a plate of waffles and Remus started to talk.
“She's cool with it then?” Remus asked, “yeah, she talks to me about guys, I talk to her about guys, it all works out nicely” Sirius said, Remus laughed.
“So we can tell James and Lily then” Remus said, Sirius nodded, “technically, but I wanna wait a bit if thats ok, maybe after Christmas?” he said. Remus nodded.
They ate their breakfast then moved their conversations to the couch.
“Sorry I was grumpy yesterday, I had a lot going on before you got here and then everything on the ice happened and it was too much to process, so I kinda went into autopilot, but I was really happy” Remus said, “I get it”.
They sat together on the couch but it wasn't long before Remus got up, pulled a blanket out of nowhere and unfolded it so they could be nice and cozy under it together.
“Wait a second, where did that come from?” Sirius was suspicious, “over there” Remus pointed at what Sirius thought was the game cupboard, the one where they got Uno from the other day. “So you knew there was a blanket down here, you just wanted me to come upstairs with you so we could snuggle on your bed” Sirius was putting the pieces together. “Are you mad about it?” Remus asked with half a laugh, it was a rhetorical question, “no” Sirius said.
“Don't worry, I would have brought you upstairs somehow anyways, or joined you down here on the couch” Remus said, “I think that would have been a bit cramped” Sirius said and looked up and down the length of the couch. “Well then it's a good thing I got you upstairs” Remus said and they laughed.
That wasn't entirely true, Remus had a twin bed and the couch couldn't have been much narrower than the bed, but Sirius preferred sleeping in Remus’s bed anyway.
“I would have probably just carried you upstairs if I had enough energy” Remus said, “really?” Sirius said in disbelief, “do you think I’m not strong enough for that” Remus challenged, “well you certainly weren't yesterday” “fair enough” Remus said and the subject got dropped.
They had brought their phones to the couch and that was when Sirius saw he had multiple missed messages from Lily and the group chat.
Lily: are you still up?
Lily: Sirius since when do you go to bed before 11 on a holiday?
Lily: unrelated but I finished all my homework for the next 2 weeks
Lily: are you good?
*The Ice Kids*
James: do you guys wanna come over for new years?
Lily: I should be able to, that sounds like fun
James: cool, we can sort out details later
Lily: sure, we can check with Sirius and Remus later cause apparently theyre still asleep
James: at 11 in the morning?
Lily: its only 10:42 but it wouldnt surprise me if Sirius was still sleeping, idk if Remus sleeps in though
James: not usually, but he mightve last night
Lily: what happened last night?
James: hockey team came over and skated on the pond, but that shouldnt make him so tired that he would sleep in super late
Lily: theres a first time for everything
James: if he doesnt respond by 11:30 I’m going over to make sure he hasnt landed himself in a coma somehow
Lily: thats up to you
“James is a good friend” Sirius said, Remus did that kind of laugh where its almost a sigh “yeah, he's like that, Lily seems nice too”.
Sirius nodded.
*The Ice Kids*
Sirius: we’re not dead
Sirius: at least I’m not, dunno about Remus
He also texted Lily back.
Sirius: I’m not sure if I should be surprised or impressed, it usually takes you 3 days but its been 4 this year, if we’re counting weekends
Lily: school gets harder every year right
He let go of his phone and tucked his hand back under the blanket, the phone slid partway down the blanket but stopped before it could fall to the ground.
“Wait, the hockey team was here?” Sirius asked, remembering the texts. Remus nodded, “it's a tradition that we started I don't know how many years ago” he started.
Sirius turned his head to face Remus as he told the story. “The boys, and girls when we still had a couple girls on our team, would come over to be the first to skate on the pond ice as soon as it froze over thick enough to hold all of us on it. Usually I would go out with dad to check and make sure it was thick enough before inviting everyone, but I’m old enough now to do it on my own” Remus explained.
“If the hockey team is the first to test the ice, why were me and Lily here with James yesterday?” Sirius asked. Remus went a bit pink and tilted his head before answering. “Because we have soft spots for you guys” before Sirius could properly react he added, “and if the ice broke at least it would be ridding the world of two figure skaters instead of a whole hockey team”.
Sirius punched him gently in the arm and they broke out into laughter.
“Speaking of James you might wanna text him before he comes bursting in here making sure you aren't dead” Sirius said. Remus smiled “yeah might be a good idea” he picked up his phone and texted James.
“Wait so does James like Lily, as in have a crush on Lily?” Sirius asked, Remus nodded. “I have never seen anyone fall for anyone else as hard as James has been crushing on Lily” he said.
“Well that works out nicely then cause Lily has a thing for James too” Sirius said, “but don't tell her I said that, she would have my head if she found out I told you”.
“Her secret is safe with me, and so is ours” Remus said and held Sirius tighter, he did the same.