Boys Don't Cry
I̶ w̶o̶u̶l̶d̶ s̶a̶y̶ I̶'m̶ s̶o̶r̶r̶y̶ I̶f̶ I̶ t̶h̶o̶u̶g̶h̶t̶ t̶h̶a̶t̶ i̶t̶ w̶o̶u̶l̶d̶ c̶h̶a̶n̶g̶e̶ y̶o̶u̶r̶ m̶i̶n̶d̶
"Padfoot! Wait up!" A voice yelled through the corridor, making Sirius Orion Black perk up, slow down his steps and turn around, walking backwards but now watching James Fleamont Potter jogging towards him, a wide grin on his face.
When James reached him, he turned around and they continued walking.
"Soooo I had this little plan for christmas this year. Only the two of us will do this, see this as a little prank. You know, it's only two more weeks and we still have to get the materials n stuff."
"Alright mate," Sirius said, "hit me. What were you thinking?" James' eyes lit up.
"Glad you asked."
B̶u̶t̶ I̶ k̶n̶o̶w̶ t̶h̶a̶t̶ t̶h̶i̶s̶ t̶i̶m̶e̶ I̶ h̶a̶v̶e̶ s̶a̶i̶d̶ t̶o̶o̶ m̶u̶c̶h̶
When they arrived at the common room, their friends, Peter and Remus, were already sitting on the red satin couch in front of the fire place, talking. The both of them sat down and joined in, made little jokes, just chatting.
Then suddenly, a very angry redhead walked in, stomping up the stairs loudly. Marlene, Dorcas and a very worried looking Alice followed her quickly, and after them, Frank Longbottom.
When he realized that he could hardly walk up to the girl's dormitory as well, he looked around and quickly sat down at the fire place, next to the marauders. James asked him what was happening, looking concerned for his friend.
Frank first sighed, then started explaining: "Lily was just coming back from her mysterious study class, you know, as she always does every two days. It seems like some... specific... Slytherins figured this out as well and decided to make fun of her and insult her.
Luckily, we others got there before anything else could happen. No doubt that Lily could defend herself, but they were six against one.
Then, Regulus came along, but as always, he just made up some excuse and left."
Sirius felt his heart drop.
B̶e̶e̶n̶ t̶o̶o̶ u̶n̶k̶i̶n̶d̶
"That wouldn't have been that bad for Lils, she's a tough nut, you know that. What really got her was the fact that her "best friend" was also there and made fun of her as well. I think I even saw him getting out his wand."
Shocked, the four friends sat there, hardly believing how low these snakes had sunken. Shock that fastly went over to anger. "HOW DARE THEY! SIX AGAINST ONE?!" James yelled.
"Yeah! That is not fair! Not even for Slytherin standards!" Pete added, which was followed by a very angry "Oh, these fuckers! I swear to Merlin, one shit ass day I will walk up to these goddamn pricks and just fucking-" by Remus.
As they continued bashing the Slytherins, Sirius couldn't get himself to forget the mention of Regulus' name, even if it wasn't important to the story. It was to him. He hadn't bullied Lily, he had just tried to get away. Why would he do that? He had stayed, he listened to his parents and he was probably going to get the dark mark soon. So why not keep up his reputation? Was he maybe not really like that? Why had Sirius never noticed this? He felt as though he had completely forgotten about his little brother being alone in that big, dark house with their gruesome parents.
Suddenly, he felt nauseous, as if he could puke any moment. Merlin knows what they did to him, what he had to go through. Without him being there for him. Now, that he realized it, he suddenly couldn't bear it anymore. He quickly made a decision, excused himself for a few moments and wrote a letter to Regulus.
I̶ t̶r̶i̶e̶d̶ t̶o̶ l̶a̶u̶g̶h̶ a̶b̶o̶u̶t̶ i̶t̶
C̶o̶v̶e̶r̶ i̶t̶ a̶l̶l̶ u̶p̶ w̶i̶t̶h̶ l̶i̶e̶s̶
I̶ t̶r̶i̶e̶d̶ t̶o̶ l̶a̶u̶g̶h̶ a̶b̶o̶u̶t̶ i̶t̶
H̶i̶d̶i̶n̶g̶ t̶h̶e̶ t̶e̶a̶r̶s̶ i̶n̶ m̶y̶ e̶y̶e̶s̶
'C̶a̶u̶s̶e̶ b̶o̶y̶s̶ d̶o̶n̶'t̶ c̶r̶y̶
Regulus' day had been as normal as it could get. Breakfast, classes, lunch, classes, study group with Lily. It was a peaceful and most precious thing to him, Lily was a very pleasant person, calming to be around.
He had been really happy about the opportunity to form a study group with her, though he had to admit it wouln't exactly be best for both of their reputations, so they didn't tell anyone. They found a secret spot in the library that they used. It was always planned and they got along very well.
I̶ w̶o̶u̶l̶d̶ t̶e̶l̶l̶ y̶o̶u̶ t̶h̶a̶t̶ I̶ l̶o̶v̶e̶d̶ y̶o̶u̶ I̶f̶ I̶ t̶h̶o̶u̶g̶h̶t̶ t̶h̶a̶t̶ y̶o̶u̶ w̶o̶u̶l̶d̶ s̶t̶a̶y̶
Later that day, when the whole bullying situation had happened, he of course felt horrible for not helping his friend, but she understood. He later that night had sent her a paper bird, apologizing over and over again, and the answer he received was full of understanding and sweet words.
Regulus was really glad to have such a good relationship with her, even though it was rocky in the beginning due to his reputation as a Black, a hater of Muggleborns, but he soon had proven her that he was in no way like his parents.
That night, while he was having a conversation with Lily per paperbirds, he received another one. Believing it was Lily's, he opened the window and let it in, and after he had unfolded it, he instantly noticed that this was not Lily's handwriting. So he read it with caution, being nervous due to not knowing what was coming next.
Rҽց, Ӏ ƙղօա Ӏ'ѵҽ ƒմϲƙҽժ մթ ҍყ Ɩҽɑѵíղց ყօմ ɑղժ ղօե íղsísեíղց օղ ყօմ ϲօʍíղց աíեհ ʍҽ. Ӏ ղҽíեհҽɾ հҽƖթҽժ ყօմ, ղօɾ ժíժ Ӏ ϲհҽϲƙ մթ օղ հօա աҽɾҽ ყօմ ժօíղց íղ եհɑե հօɾɾíҍƖҽ հօմsҽ. lօղց sեօɾყ sհօɾե, Ӏ'ѵҽ ҍҽҽղ ɑ sհíե օƒ ɑ ҍɾօեհҽɾ ɑղժ ɑղ ɑҍsօƖմեҽ թɾɑե եօաɑɾժs ყօմ. lҽե ʍҽ ʍɑƙҽ íե մթ եօ ყօմ ɑղժ íղѵíեҽ ყօմ եօ եհҽ Ƥօեեҽɾ's ƒօɾ Ƈհɾísեʍɑs. Ӏ ժíժղ'ե եҽƖƖ Jɑʍҽs օƒ ʍყ թƖɑղ ყҽե, ղօɾ հís թɑɾҽղեs, ɑղժ Ӏ եհíղƙ íե աօմƖժ ҍҽ ҍҽեեҽɾ íƒ ყօմ ɑsƙҽժ եհҽʍ, sօ եհҽყ sҽҽ ყօմ'ɾҽ ղօե ɑϲեմɑƖƖყ ҍɑժ. Ӏ ƙղօա եհís sօմղժs sեմթíժ ҍմե եɾմsե ʍҽ թƖҽɑsҽ. lօѵҽ ყօմ ѵҽɾყ ʍմϲհ, Տ.Ơ.Ɓ.
Regulus was shocked. S.O.B. His brothers initials. An apology letter. An indirect invitation. His brother wrote to him.
After a year of nothing, no smiles exchanged, no words said or written, no damn looks in his direction, he suddenly apoplogized to him. For no reason.
B̶u̶t̶ I̶ k̶n̶o̶w̶ t̶h̶a̶t̶ i̶t̶'s̶ n̶o̶ u̶s̶e̶
Regulus had denied the invitation the first time, he stayed by his parents so they wouldn't go after Sirius. Did Sirius not know this?
Then he realized what he had said. The Potters. Christmas. James Potter. His house. His parents. Alone. He started panicking. How should he ask him when he couldn't even look at him without becoming red? What if he said no, what if he hated Regulus? Was that worth it? Chistmas with his brother?
A̶n̶d̶ y̶o̶u̶'v̶e̶ a̶l̶r̶e̶a̶d̶y̶ g̶o̶n̶e̶ a̶w̶a̶y̶
He knew, the answer was yes. The laughs, the hugs and just the being with his brother, he missed it dearly. He missed having someone to make stupid jokes with, to stay up all night with and to cry his eyes out on.
T̶h̶o̶u̶g̶h̶t̶ t̶h̶a̶t̶ y̶o̶u̶ n̶e̶e̶d̶e̶d̶ m̶e̶ m̶o̶r̶e̶, m̶o̶r̶e̶, m̶o̶r̶e̶
He knew it was a yes, long before he really knew. Because it had been too long. His heart ached and his mind screamed, yet he replied to his blood traitor brother.
I̶ t̶r̶i̶e̶d̶ t̶o̶ l̶a̶u̶g̶h̶ a̶b̶o̶u̶t̶ i̶t̶
C̶o̶v̶e̶r̶ i̶t̶ a̶l̶l̶ u̶p̶ w̶i̶t̶h̶ l̶i̶e̶s̶
I̶ t̶r̶i̶e̶d̶ t̶o̶ l̶a̶u̶g̶h̶ a̶b̶o̶u̶t̶ i̶t̶
H̶i̶d̶i̶n̶g̶ t̶h̶e̶ t̶e̶a̶r̶s̶ i̶n̶ m̶y̶ e̶y̶e̶s̶
'C̶a̶u̶s̶e̶ b̶o̶y̶s̶ d̶o̶n̶'t̶ c̶r̶y̶
B̶o̶y̶s̶ d̶o̶n̶'t̶ c̶r̶y̶