Sleepless Nights
Morning arrived before sleep had the chance to claim Hermione and she sat up, peering out the window to the grounds below. As light flooded the room she found that Hannah was sitting up in her own bed now. “Did you sleep at all?” Hannah asked softly.
Hermione shook her head. “I tried but this castle has too many memories I think.”
Hannah sighed, rubbing her temples. “I think so too. I didn’t get any sleep either. I saw you leave at around three and I thought maybe you were going to try in the common room, but then you came back so soon.”
“I was planning on reading down there. I didn’t want to bother you with the light.” Hermione explained. “But Malfoy was already down there, so I came back up.”
They sat in silence for a few minutes before Hannah said, “I feel sorry for him.”
Hermione’s gaze had drifted to the floor in the time they hadn’t said anything, but her eyes snapped up to look at Hannah when she said the words. “What?” She asked, voice harder than she’d meant for it to be.
“He isn’t all bad.” Hannah said, quick to defend herself. “I know he did some awful things to you, Ron and Harry but he’s well, different now, I suppose. Last year, some of the kid’s who’d gotten detention were in the dungeons, being tortured and it was three first years, two second years and my little sister, and well I couldn’t leave her there. So I snuck down that night to help her escape through the Room of Requirement, and I couldn’t leave the others either. But some of them were really hurt and I was on my own so it was really slow going.” Hannah explained, wringing her hands as she spoke.
“Malfoy caught us a few halls away from the Room of Requirement.” She took in a shaky breath. “I thought for sure that we were all dead, but then he just yawned and looked the other way, as if he hadn’t seen anything at all. And he never reported me or anything. Those kids all lived and are back this year and I never got into any sort of trouble for it.”
Hermione gaped at Hannah as she finished her story. After a long moment she asked, “Why didn’t you say that at the trial?”
Hannah shrugged. “I couldn’t go. I sent in a written statement though and they wrote back, saying that my testimony had been helpful in the case.” They lapsed into another bout of silence before Hannah asked, “Why didn’t Ron come back?”
“I don’t know. He didn’t like school much, aside from seeing Harry and I, but we don’t talk to Ron anymore, so I suppose he had no reason to return.”
Hannah’s eyes widened. “You and Harry don’t talk to Ron? But you three were inseparable and I thought you and Ron were dating?”
Hermione sighed. “Ron was very angry with Harry and I for testifying on Narcissa and Malfoy’s behalf.” Hermione explained, her voice a little sad. “He thought we were betraying him or something, that it was some heinous crime to defend them in court. He thought they both deserved to rot in Azkaban for the rest of their lives. And he was always so stubborn, we weren’t able to convince him otherwise.”
“Oh.” Hannah said and there was a trace of sadness in her voice. “Just another causality of the war, I suppose.”
“Yeah.” Hermione said, then in a rush, “We were never going to work out. I think we both knew that from the start, I mean, we were just… so different. We were always working towards something, we always had a goal, and we were friends because those goals aligned. But now, with our goals so vastly different… there isn’t anything left for us. We’re just… on different paths now.”
“You mean, you’re working towards a future for yourself and he’s just sitting at home, wallowing in his self-pity.” Hannah said and Hermione laughed abruptly.
“Well, I was trying to be a bit kinder than that, but essentially, yes.” Hermione found that she liked Hannah quite a lot. “So you and Neville?” Hermione asked. “I heard the two of you got together over the summer holiday.”
Hannah’s face lit up. “Yep. I had an apprenticeship at St. Mungos. I’m planning on becoming a healer there. I was in the memory loss ward most of the time, so I saw a lot of him. And we just clicked.” She said with a happy little shrug.
As if on cue there was a knock on the door. “It’s open.” Hermione called and sure enough Neville opened it. Hermione was surprised though to find Harry beside him. Both of them looked incredibly tired. “Let me guess, neither of you slept either.”
They both shook their heads. “Couldn’t.” Neville said quietly. “Too much history here, I think.”
“We just had the very same conversation.” Hannah said, sliding off her her bed to stride over to Neville gracefully. She wrapped her arms around his neck and his hands immediately fell to her waist. Hermione felt a pang of jealously as she realized Hannah’s hair was still flawless, sleek and perfectly straight, falling in effortless blonde sheets down her back.
“Harry,” Hermione said loudly, “I think that’s our cue.” She hopped out of bed, tucking her hair into a bun that she was sure looked absolutely horrendous and grabbed his arm, dragging him away from the scene unfolding before them.
Neville turned a little red as she passed, but Hannah only laughed and gave Hermione a little wink. She practically dragged an oblivious Harry down the stairs and into the common room where they flopped onto the nearest sofa. Hermione stretched out with her book, resting her legs over Harry’s lap.
“What are you reading?” He asked her after she’d only made it through one paragraph.
“It’s a book on the theory of memory wipe charms.” Hermione explained. “Shit, I left my notebook up in the room.”
“I can go grab mine.” Harry offered.
“No,” Hermione said hurriedly. “We don’t know whose room they went in, and I’m quite sure you don’t want to walk in on them.”
Harry nodded and went back to staring at the fire. Hermione read three more paragraphs before he spoke again. “It’s for your parents, isn’t it? To get their memories back.”
“It is.” Hermione confirmed. “I’m worried, Harry.” She admitted. “I’ve been researching all summer, you know? And I’ve come up with absolutely nothing. I just keep hoping I’m going to read a line and all of the pieces are going to come together, but that just isn’t happening. What if they’re like Neville’s parents, and they never get their memories back?”
Harry sighed. “Hermione, even if they never get their memories back, it still won’t be like Neville’s parents. I hope you haven’t been picturing them like that. They’re happy. They’re somewhere together, with all of their happy, fake memories, living a wonderful life. Even if you never get them back, that should at least be some comfort to you, right?”
Hermione groaned, closing the book. “I didn’t mean the same like that. I know they’re happy. I just meant the same in that they’re unreachable. They’re still alive, but I can’t have them, can’t talk to them, see them. And it’s all a lie. What if they feel empty, hollowed out by some unnamed loss they can’t remember?”
“You are way too good at spells for that, Hermione.” Harry assured her, but it was little comfort. She missed them so badly, it was a physical pain to her. But she knew Harry had said all he could to comfort her and she couldn’t let him know that he’d failed.
“You’re right, I just… miss them.” She whispered.
“I know and I’m sorry. I can help you research if you’d like.” He offered gently. And something warm lit inside of her at his words. Maybe he hadn’t failed after all. She knew how much he loathed research, but for her he would do it.
They waited an hour, with Harry watching the fire and Hermione reading her book before they decided it was an acceptable hour for them to head down to the Great Hall for breakfast.
It warmed Hermione more than any fire ever could to see what awaited them in the Great Hall. Many of the students were already there, snagging a bite to eat before their placement exams. And none of them were sitting in accordance with their assigned houses, but rather mixed up to sit with their friends, which bridged across the houses. Especially the younger students, green and red and blue and yellow ties sitting shoulder to shoulder, bubbling with conversation and smiles lighting their faces.
“Maybe there is hope for us, after all.” She whispered as they walked into the room to find Ginny and Luna, already sitting at what was once the Hufflepuff table. They took their places across from the two and immediately Ginny began throwing an odd assortment of foods onto Hermione’s plate. She was grateful for it, the silent reminder that she needed to eat something- anything. She had not done such a good job of feeding herself over the summer, so enthralled in her research that Kreacher often had to remind her to eat.
At the next table over- the formerly Slytherin one- Hermione found Malfoy, Theo, Blaise and Pansy sitting all the way at the end, sitting as closely together as they could and as far from the others as was physically possible. Her scrutinization of the four of them was interrupted by a flustered looking Lavender flopping down into the seat beside Hermione. “I absolutely cannot with that heathen.” She scowled in Pansy’s direction and Hermione remembered then that they were roommates.
“Who?” Ginny asked, looking in the direction Lavender was glaring.
“Pansy Parkinson. That bitch is my roommate. I cannot stand her. You know they’ve allowed her a wand?” Lavender seethed. “She’s already threatened to hex me six times and she drew a line straight down the center of our room and told me to stay on my side! Unbelievable, absolutely unbelievable! You get flawless, kind, Hufflepuff, Hannah Abbott and I’m stuck with the bitchiest most vile Slytherin there is.”
Hermione had to sip her pumpkin juice to hide her smile. It wasn’t that she didn’t feel badly for Lavender, no one deserved to have to room with Pansy, but the thought of their two entirely different personalities sharing a living space was comical. “Technically speaking, I don’t think she did anything unlawful.” Luna said serenely.
Lavender turned her murderous stare on Luna and gaped at her when she found no humor in Luna’s expression, no sign that she was joking. “She is a bloody Slytherin!” Lavender exclaimed, quite loudly.
“Yes but they can’t just go around taking every Slytherins’ wand away.” Ginny said reasonably, though Hermione could see that she too was trying to hold in laughter.
“Why not? They’re rotten, the whole lot of them.” Lavender said, her expression malicious. “I’m going to talk to McGonagall.” She said suddenly standing and stalking off towards the teacher’s table.
As soon as she was out of earshot Ginny and Hermione burst out laughing, unable to contain it any longer. “She is really something else.” Ginny said between chuckles.
“She can’t be serious, can she?” Luna asked seriously, “I mean that’s almost as bad as thinking all muggleborns are weaker.”
“Don’t worry.” Ginny said. “McGonagall will shut her down real fast.”
And indeed, McGonagall did just that, as evidenced by the way Lavender came back to the table with her arms crossed and eyes filled with anger. She said nothing and just resumed glaring at Pansy, who soon noticed her stare and offering her a taunting wave and wink, a catlike smile crossing her face for a mere moment.
“I’m going to kill her.” Lavender hissed. But she didn’t have the chance as McGonagall called for everyone to exit the hall except for Ginny’s year, so they could begin the placement examinations.
***
The next day- after another night of no sleep- brought with it the start of classes. As expected, Luna and Ginny had been allowed to move on to their seventh year lessons. Hermione was glad to find that Luna was in her Ancient Runes class first thing after breakfast. Hermione was not quite as glad to learn that Malfoy was also in it. Luckily he- wisely- chose to sit on the opposite end of the room from her.
During class she found her attention flicking over to him periodically, and each time she did she found that he did not seem to be paying attention at all to the lesson. However, when the Professor called on him he answered correctly with no hesitation. Perhaps he was paying more attention than she thought.
The rest of the day was uneventful with Defense Against the Dark Arts with Harry, Ginny and Luna, charms with Harry and transfiguration with Ginny. The two of them walked together to their last class of the day- potions. It was still in the dungeons, which Hermione supposed made sense since that was where all of the materials were, but since the new professor was the head of Gryffindor, it felt on to take the class in Slytherin territory.
When Ginny and Hermione entered the classroom, they found many of the other students already inside, standing along the back wall of the class. None of them had taken their seats. Harry was quick to explain. “She told us she’s assigned us seats, but she wants to wait until everyone’s here to give them out.”
So Hermione and Ginny joined him along the back wall. Finally everyone was inside, but the teacher was still nowhere to be seen. Just as Hermione was beginning to think she wasn’t going to show, she emerged from the office that branched just off of the room. She beamed at all of them and clasped her hands together. “Hello everyone, my name is Rerly Lennoran. I was here at Hogwarts when you were in your first and second years here, and I was in Gryffindor. Professor Slughorn was kind enough to leave me with the extensive notes he took on the lessons he taught and I have used them to prepare partners for all of you.”
She seemed incredibly kind and Hermione thought she could remember her faintly from her early years in the castle. Professor Lennoran began rattling off all of the seating arrangements and Hermione listened intently for her name. But as Lennoran went on the student’s along the wall began to dwindle without Hermione hearing her name. It continued on until only Hermione, Ginny, Harry and Malfoy were left at the back. That meant one of them was going to draw the short straw and be forced to be his partner.
She prayed to Merlin that it wouldn’t be her, but of course Merlin had never been on her side in anything. “Hermione Granger and Draco Malfoy, you’re right here.” Lennoran said, gesturing happily to the back right corner station. Hermione frozen and she saw as Malfoy stiffened, the whole class began muttering to their partners and Lennoran’s eyes widened minutely. “Is there a problem?”
Hermione did not like being the center of attention and she didn’t want this young, bubbly teacher to know severity and years of animosity lying within the pairing she’d just made. So, Hermione strode over to the table purposely and, shoving down her nerves, quipped, “No, there’s no problem. They just know we’re the some of the best in this class and they’re worried for any future competitions we might have in this class.” She settled into her seat and gave a reassuring smile- at least she hoped it was reassuring. She had no idea whether it came off that way, it very well could have been a grimace for all she knew.
A little more hesitantly, Malfoy took his seat beside her and Harry and Ginny took the remaining open station. “Perfect, now I’m sure some of you have realized this already, but the textbooks you’ve been given are absolute bonkers with all of the mistakes in them, so with each potion we brew, we will be adding in our own corrections to them. If you’ll flip to page seventy nine, we will be brewing a dreamless sleep potion today. I’m sure some of you could use this right about now. So my challenge for you all is to brew this potion and attempt to make your own corrections to the instructions provided. There are exactly six errors in it. And as Miss Granger has alluded to, todays lesson will be a competition, but don’t worry this isn’t for a grade beyond effort and I will give you the correct answers at the end.”
With that she told them to begin. Hermione thought Harry must me missing Snape’s copy of the book right about now, as she scanned over the instructions. She thought back to all of the tricks Harry had told her about during their sixth year, but the memories were foggy. To her surprise when she glanced over at Malfoy, he was already crossing something out in the sixth instruction and jotting a new direction in the margin below.
More focused now, she returned her attention to her copy and found a mistake she remembered encountering in other potions in the fourth instruction. Later she found one in the seventeenth and again in the twenty-fifth. She read through a couple more times before determining that she could not find anymore problems with the text.
“What have you found?” She asked Malfoy tentatively, turning to look at him.
“One in the sixth, another in the seventeenth and one in the twenty-fifth.” He said shortly. “You?”
“Fourth, seventeenth and twenty-fifth.” She replied.
“Fourth?” He asked, surprised. He looked down at her scribbled corrections, his brow furrowed in concentration before he nodded curtly and added the correction to his before pushing his copy over for her to see the sixth. After reading what he’d written, she found that he was right and quickly added the note.
“I have no idea what the other two issues are.” She said.
“Me neither.” He replied. “Should we just go with it as is and hope for the best?”
She nodded and quickly got to her feet to collect the ingredients. They stood at the same and had the awkward stare-off over who was going to go get them before Malfoy turned on his heel and headed towards the supply cabinets. He returned a moment later, just as Hermione was resuming her seat and they began without a word.
They were nearly finished when Hermione realized Malfoy had not grabbed the baneberry due to its high reactivity to the hemlock. It was the final ingredient they needed. “If you’ll cast the stabilizing charm, I’ll go and fetch the hemlock.” She offered.
He looked at her as though she was making some cruel joke. When she didn’t laugh or react at all he said, “Granger, I haven’t been allowed a wand.” Hermione’s mouth opened in a surprised ‘o’ and she said nothing, unsure how to respond to that. “And in any case, Potter still has mine.”
“Right,” She said lamely. “I’ll cast the charm then, you get the baneberry.” He rose gracefully and went to collect it as she cast the charm. Perhaps Lavender wasn’t too far off in her suggestion of denying the Slytherins wand privileges. Only it wasn’t due to his being a Slytherin, it was because he was a death eater. She wondered how he was able to do transfiguration and charms without one.
Across the room, a potion exploded, surely someone had tried to add the baneberry without first thoroughly stirred and then stabilizing the potion. But that wasn’t what caught her attention, what caught her attention was the way Malfoy flinched violently in the mere moment before her eyes snapped in the direction of the sound. She didn’t think anyone else had seen his reaction, all too focused on the source of the noise. But she had seen and she knew what it meant.
Sure, some of the other students had jumped a little, but that flinch…
She pretended not to have seen it when he returned and dropped the baneberries in unceremoniously. She held her breath, waiting for an explosion, but none occurred. In fact, the only reaction was for the potion to turn a deep purple, only slightly off from what was the desired color. She attributed that to the two errors they’d missed.
It was too late to do anything about it now, so she ladled a bit of the potion into a vial and brought it up to Lennoran’s desk and placed it in the rack associated with her station.
With five minutes left of the class, Lennoran announced the final call for the potion samples to be turned in. Those who had not already brought them forward did so then and Lennoran examined each of them in turn. Before announcing the winner she wrote all of the errors up on the board, along with their corrections. Hermione mentally chided herself for not catching them, in hindsight they were both fairly obvious.
“Okay, now for the moment you have all been waiting for.” Lennoran said with a flourish. “Today’s winner is in fact, Miss Hermione Granger and Mr. Draco Malfoy. As we can see, Hermione was right in her previous statement, a perfect example of practicing what you preach. Tell me Hermione, how many of the errors did you and Mr. Malfoy catch?”
“Four.” Hermione said proudly.
Lennoran beamed. “As I thought. I assume you missed eleven and nineteen?” Hermione nodded. Lennoran turned to the class, “Anyone else catch four?” No one else raised their hands. Pride swelled in Hermione’s chest. “Alright, well here we are then, those two are the ones to beat. Don’t worry, I’ll have another competition for you next class, plenty of opportunity for you all to beat them. I think we’ll keep a running tally of victories, just for the fun of it.”
Class was dismissed and Hermione walked with Ginny and Harry out of the dungeons. “I thought for you the two of you were going to fail miserably.” Ginny admitted.
“Hey!” Hermione protested.
“Not because you’re unskilled or anything, come on Hermione, I know you’re brilliant. It’s just that I didn’t think you and Malfoy were going to be able to work together.” Ginny said, not quite defensively, but on the borderline of it.
“We figured it out.” She said, deciding not to mention that fact that it had been quite easy to work with him, all things considered. She also chose to keep it a secret that he wasn’t allowed a wand and how he’d flinched when that potion had exploded. Though she couldn’t for the life of her figure out why she didn’t want to share Malfoy’s weaknesses with them.