Why Did I Let You Leave?

There were some privacy wards erected by the time Severus nailed Potter and Rigel's exact location. Never the matter. He knew how to integrate himself seamlessly into wards.

"—why, Harry, why ?" Potter’s voice choked, "All for potions?"

Harry.

Harriet Potter.

Severus' heart was beating too loudly for him to focus properly on anything else. Surely the girl hadn't—

"Thorough," she disagreed, topping it with a guileless smile when he glanced at her sardonically. "You want to view the process as objectively as possible, right, Professor?"

He frowned deeply at her and she flushed slightly as she realized her mistake. "Professor?" he repeated, slightly foreboding.

"That's what Rigel calls you," she said, biting her lip in a show of chagrin. "Sorry, Master Snape."

He raised his eyebrows expectantly. Taking a breath, she said, begrudgingly, "I don't want to be treated differently because of my magic. People expect things from you when you have magic. It's dangerous."

Severus was supremely irked. "You sound like my foolish apprentice. Did he sell you on this idea?"

"I agree with him," she said easily. "Rigel would know, after all. People started treating him differently when his magic got powerful."

"Rigel is going to be the lord of a very influential family one day. There are many reasons for the way people treat him, not all of them related to his magic," He snapped.

"It doesn't help his anonymity from certain groups, though, does it?" she pointed out.

"Your situation is different," Snape sneered. "Do you really think the SOW Party is going to come headhunting you?"

No. This was foolish. There were so many things wrong with this—

Rigel couldn't be Potter's child.

He couldn't lose both his apprentices because of this crime.

It couldn't— she couldn't be Rigel—

The girl had been sent to torture him, perhaps in payment for some offense he'd laid against the gods. Every feature was a barb, digging into his soul with careless momentum. Her hair, arranged in exactly the style Lily had favored as a girl. Her eyes, a watered-down bastardization of the green they imitated. More than their color, though, it was the expression they carried that had him grinding his teeth. The girl looked at him like he was a magistrate, and she awaited an execution order. Didn't she know how foolish it was to give power over oneself to a complete stranger? She gazed up at him calmly, even with the fervent hope burning in her eyes. Was she an idiot, to place so much unnecessary faith in a name she'd read in some backlogged Guild periodical?

Severus raised an eyebrow at Rigel, "I know him, yes. He rarely publishes, and when he does it generally isn't in English. Where did you come across his name?"

"He is overseeing my cousin Harry's internship this summer," Rigel said, "She hadn't heard of him either, so I thought I'd ask if you knew his specialty?"

"Miss Potter acquired an internship at the Guild?" Severus' eyes were suddenly piercing, "They don't take on students below NEWT level."

Rigel took the opportunity for promotion with alacrity, "Harry is really good. I wouldn't be surprised if she's NEWT-level. The Aldermaster came across some of her work and recommended her. So you do know Master Thomas?"

There was something annoyingly familiar about her. Beyond the Potter hair and chin, of course. Severus sharpened his senses and examined her aura, but it was utterly unfamiliar to him—not to mention vague and rudimentary.

It was the first time in a long time that Severus could remember impatiently anticipating another brewer's work. Perhaps true innovation had returned to the English potions community at last. At the very least, Harriet Potter's potions career promised to be intriguing.

A halfblood with a modicum of talent and original ideas? Severus smirked. Not a bad combination at all.

He couldn’t look away any longer. But he wanted to.

"It's not them, exactly," Rigel said, almost squirming. "Professor, you have to understand, I…my family is really big on pranks. I know I don't have to tell you that," she hurried on, seeing his face darken, "It's just that you're right, okay? I'm not all that interested in them, but…I sort of have to be. If I don't, my dad will worry about me. Well, not worry about me, exactly, but I've always been different than my family expected or maybe hoped. It's already a lot for my dad that I enjoy potions and book learning so much, and I don't want to…"

"Disappoint him," Snape finished.

It then hit him what this meant for the Potters. For Lily.

"I never meant for it to get so out of hand!" Rigel said, voice pleading for understanding, "I'm sorry."

"Out of hand?" Potter had clearly lost it, "Sorry doesn’t fix anything, Harry! Do you even realise you could end up going to Azkaban because of this? For some childish dream of being mentored by your idol?" He spat the last word.

"I do!" Rigel's voice was a little bitter now, "I know it better than any of you, actually. I've had to live with this knowledge for years!"

"And you still don't regret it?" Potter’s voice was full of disbelief, "Just how far are you going to drag this obsession of yours, Harry? How long are you going to seek out ways to become like him? What did you get, in the end? What will you become? The smelly kid who is bullied at school? No wonder Jordan would come aft—"

Severus knew then, as surely as he knew Potter was an idiot , that something had cracked in Rigel. Something that even Severus could not heal.

"James!" It was Lily's voice.

"Go on, Dad." Rigel's voice was wavering, but it was still sharp, "Go on."

There was silence.

"You know," Rigel said quietly, "I get that it is my fault. I get that I did something foolish. But do you even realise all the ways you went wrong?"

"Stop it, you two." Lily said, her voice breaking, "We'll talk it all out at home. For now we should get you out of here—"

"No." Rigel said, throat hoarse, "You've always brushed things aside when they make you uncomfortable, Dad! That includes my passion, my dream, and me! It doesn't work like that! You can't acknowledge me and my skills whenever you see them as 'worthy' and then turn away when it's not what you hoped for! When I'm not what you hoped for."

His voice cracked, "I'm not Archie, dad. I know you want me to be, but I'm not him. I'm Harry. Just Harry."

Potter seemed to be at a loss for words.

"Some part of me expected, when we switched, that you would notice something was off. Surely you knew me that much. But you didn't. You found it perfect: Harry isn't into Potions anymore! Everything is wonderful!" Harry took a deep breath, "When I was younger, I thought that maybe someday you'd understand. Someday you'd realise that Potions are my world, just like pranks and mischief are yours. Can you imagine a life without them? Would you have changed your path, if your parents had discouraged you from pursuing them? Or would you have gone on anyway?"

"I was young and foolish and uncomprehending of the ways the world runs. But I was also hurt." Harry was barely getting the words out anymore, "Did you know that? Did you know you were hurting me? That you all were hurting me?"

There was silence.

"I haven't forgotten the stirring rod yet." Harry said, "I don't think I ever will. Because you never changed. Not unless the Potions path I chose coincided with your passions. Not unless it was a prank potion I brewed, or if I became an entrepreneur. I was never enough by myself."

"Do you know why I wanted to go to Hogwarts, Dad?" Her wand went limp by her side, "I wanted to hear Professor Snape saying that I could make it, in the field. It was to see if someone cared for it just as much as I did. I got my answer pretty early. But do you know why I didn't leave, other than the fact that I was learning things I could never learn elsewhere? Because Hogwarts became more of a home than anywhere else. Even under a false name, I could be more myself. Professor Snape… became like a father to me. Because while he told me where I was wrong, while he knew to scold and to correct, he cared for me as I was. I'm afraid you failed the latter part."

And she turned, and walked out.

Not long after, Severus caught up.